Daring to Dream
by Breeze2
Summary: In the city of Tashbaan, Karna had always felt as though she didn't quite belong. One night, her mother tells her a story that changes her life forever ... A story of the golden age ... Set during HHB. COMPLETE.
1. Prologue

Daring to Dream

Prologue

In the ancient scriptures of Tash, there was a clear divide between the fate of the faithful in the last days of the world and those of the traitors. In glory, the faithful would help Tash to crush his enemies and then follow him into paradise. Whereas the treacherous that turned against the great god would be crushed by his power in the final battle and thrust into a pit of endless fire and torment.

Sometimes on sleepless nights Harradin Tarkhaan had sat pondering this pit and wondering about the end of the world. He had long questioned what so horrific a place would be like, where there was no end to the horror or pain.

And all he could think of was the field of battle.

In Calormen, war was idealised. Young boys grew up on the image of what a wonderful thing it was to fight for one's country and victoriously vanquish the enemies of Tash. To become a warrior was to truly be a man. He had frequently repeated the words of the poets and wondered at their truth.

" _To die for one's country is a treasure greater than the most precious jewel."_

He whispered them now on the battlefield, staring around at what truly seemed to be the darkest place on earth.

In front of him, hundreds of men fought for their lives in the Tisroc's great army. Horses reared and brought their hooves thundering down, cracking skulls. Arrows pierced through armour, breaking bone and tearing flesh. The cries of the wounded and dying mingled with the war cries of the living, creating a cacophony of hell that assaulted the ears.

With practised ease, Harradin urged his destrier to the top of a hillock, staring about for his squadron. To his left, he caught the colours of his province and called loudly,

"To me, all soldiers of Callidar province! To me all those who fight in the Tisroc's name, May he live forever!"

Men appeared all about him, their dirty faces weary but filled with the light of battle. One soldier raised a stained hand to point out a sight in the distance,

"My Lord, the enemy are converging on the Tisroc's guard."

Harradin turned his stallion hurriedly and saw in an instant what the enemy were attempting. The Tisroc and his guard were high on a hill overlooking the battle, but the enemy were converging upon him in two groups – one from the east and one, the south. The aim was clear – to split the Tisroc's men into two groups and leave him open to attack.

Wrenching his stallion around with a loud roar, he bellowed to his men at the top of his voice, "Way! Way to me, men of Callidar Province! Follow me all men loyal to the Tisroc, may he live for ever. _Charge!_ "

As a breakneck pace, he led his men through the small valley and up towards the enemy. As clear as a knife slicing through butter, they cleaved a hole through the enemy's line and scattered their troops. Quickly burying his spear in the skull of one soldier, Harradin looked for the Tisroc. Their ruler's guard had been able to fight back the assault from the east and thankfully, it looked as though the enemy were turning to flee. In a single moment, the call to retreat was heard and the enemy started to pour from the field, making it every man for himself.

To stop them pursuing, Harradin bellowed at his men and managed to rally them before unnecessary blood was shed. "We go to the Tiscroc!" he shouted and galloped off to his general, awaiting their orders.

After pursuing the enemy to the great river, the Calormen army was assembled in a great horse shoe, all facing a cleared space in the middle. On his chariot, the Tisroc stood to the cheering of his army for many minutes, before he lifted his arms for silence.

"We have won a great victory today!" he shouted, "In the name of Tash, we give him all the glory for this great and worthy victory, for it proves the right of our claim over this barbarian land and its king! I knew that when we went against Ulvar we would be victorious and now here is our proof! Here is their king, the once celebrated warrior, Darnen!"

The defeated king was at this point shoved forwards, bound in chains and bloody faced. The army cheered and jeered at the defeated man.

"But who am I going to give the highest honour this day, you many ask?" the Tisroc continued. "Well, there is a Tarkhaan among you whose bravery and brilliant leadership saved my life. I therefore call for Tarkhaan Harradin to come forward and present himself."

The soldiers of Callidar Province roared their approval as Harradin cantered on to the field. His heart beat wildly against his chest as he realised what he what he would be asked to do. But he could see no way out. He dismounted and bowed low to the Tisroc.

Their ruler raised his arms for silence and turned to Harradin with a gracious smile. "For your great courage, Tarkhaan, I present you with my sword. I bestow the honour of executing this coward and one of our greatest enemies upon you, worthy and couragerous Harradin."

Harradin felt helpless. He struggled to find the words as he stared at first his ruler, his victorious army and then the ruin of a man upon the floor.

He took the proffered sword and considered its weight. It was more trinket that serviceable weapon. Heavily inlaid with useless jewels that affected the balance and speed with which it could be wielded. A typical ceremonial blade.

He turned to the defeated man before him and felt his blood pounding in his ears. Every rule of fair and just battle, honour, and true nobility - railed against this action. To kill a defenceless man was the act of a coward, not a knight.

Unable to act, he turned to his king with a sombre expression. "Oh great Tisroc, may you live forever, but I cannot fulfil the act that you have commanded of me. To kill an unarmed and bound man goes against every rule of nobility and honour. Ask me to perform any other task for you and I will gladly fulfil it, but not this."

The Tisroc's expression darkened. "You would humiliate me in front of my entire army?" he demanded, "when I have given you the honour of executing our greatest enemy?"

"In any other manner, my lord," Harradin pleaded. "Let me meet him on a field of battle, or in close combat. I cannot strike down an unarmed man."

His ruler glared at him. "I command you to fulfil my will."

Helplessly, Harradin proffered the sword to his king. "I cannot, oh great and powerful Tisroc, do with me what you will. For I cannot obey your command."

The Tisroc's face flushed scarlet with rage. In one motion, he snatched the sword from the victorious commander's hands and brought the blade sweeping down. He beheaded Harradin Tarkhaan with one clean sweep.

"Hear me!" He bellowed at the stunned army. "So die all traitors who fail to fulfil the will of their ruler on earth. I am the Tisroc, chosen by Tash to rule our great nation! Defy me and face the same fate as this traitor!"

On every side, the Calormen army roared its approval.

* * *

Author's note: I apologise for the violence of this prologue – but it sets the scene of the story.

 _Daring to Dream_ is set during _The Horse and His Boy_ and explores life in Calormen and Tashbaan for the normal, working class people. I am trying to create a realistic portrayal of life in Calormen society, so this will be quite a detailed, in depth look at the traditions and style of living in Calormen that I picture. All constructive criticism is gladly welcomed!

Thank you for reading,

Breeze.


	2. The Daughter of Harradin

Daring to Dream

Chapter One

The Daughter of Harradin

In the dim light, Tarneesh turned over. With a groan, he forced himself to rise from the straw mattress before staggering across the room towards a rickety table. Slowly taking the bowl that was upon it, he splashed half the tepid water it contained onto his face and used the other half of it to swill out his mouth. He carelessly spat the liquid onto the single rug that covered floor before moving towards the only chair in the room. He pulled his clothes on thoughtlessly, glancing around him at the other sleeping figures as he did so.

His gaze came to rest upon his two sons. Kanzeesh and Andur were stocky and as dark as Tarneesh, brawny lads and good fighters like their father had been in his youth.

Grunting with satisfaction, he turned to stare at the woman who lay on the other side of his mattress. Again his expression was that of approval, the most affectionate look he could ever make. Though they had been married sixteen years, Hezal still resembled the young widow he had married. As gentle and sweet-faced as she had been then—though perhaps a little thinner—she had brought four children to his house and had been dutiful and obedient.

Turning once more, his eyes came to rest on his two daughters; Tarlana and Karlis. One of them was large and stocky as her father, while the other had the small, delicate figure of her mother. Despite having the curse of being female (who were by nature less intelligent), both were submissive and compliant to their father's will. Therefore, even to them was he able to feel agreeability.

The final figure he turned to drew a scowl to his face.

Upon the mattress nearest the door he could make out the figure of a tall, slender girl. Curled up beneath her blanket, Karna's face was delicate, and like that of her mother, but with a height that both he and his wife lacked. After glowering at her sleeping form for a moment, he kicked her roughly, growling for her to get up.

Complying at once, the girl jumped to her feet. "Yes, oh my father and the delight of my eyes?" she answered.

"Get dressed, girl, and draw fresh water from the well."

She immediately nodded, hurrying behind a crooked dressing screen. She emerged a few moments later wearing a ragged dress, in the process of pulling a shawl about her shoulders. Without another look at Tarneesh, she left the house gladly, closing the door silently behind her. She smiled as the first freshness of the morning breeze touched her face.

Slowly, she made her way up the narrow, dirty street, relishing the early coolness. She made her way through the winding back streets, soon arriving at the communal well. At that early hour it was almost deserted, and she joined the back of the short queue, gladly hailing the neighbour who stood in front of her.

"Good day Maralis, in the name of Tash (may he praised). How fare you this day?"

"Good day, Karna, in the name of Tash (may he be praised). I am well, I thank you. How does your family?"

"My family is well, I thank you," Karna replied. "My father and brothers are to visit the market this day with their latest carvings of great Tash (may he be praised). They hope to make a fair profit upon them, for father says that several are of excellent craftsmanship."

"I wish them every success in their business, in the name of Tash (may he be praised)," Maralis replied.

"I thank you. Will Tamara be coming to work with us under Master Tirshan's employ this day?"

"She will, for—praise Tash—her sister is now old enough to not require her constant supervision. The added income from her work will also not go amiss." After her turn to draw water, Maralis inclined her head to Karna, bidding her a good day before hurrying off to feed her family.

Having drawn her own water, Karna moved in the direction of home, dawdling as much as she dared. She had no wish of leave the peace and cool of the street and enter the warm stuffiness of the house, or to be confronted by Tarneesh's glowering face. Hesitantly, she carried her bucket of water into the dwelling, in no doubt about the kind of reception she would receive.

However, instead of the expected hostility, she found Hezal in the outer room of the house kneading the morning loaf by the fire. With a smile, the woman rose at the sight of her daughter and gently took her in her arms. While her husband remained out of sight, she allowed herself this rare intimacy that was normally forbidden.

Heavily frowned upon in Calormen society, Tarneesh never showed affection and had little understanding of love. His sons had learned to be the same way. To Hezal and her daughters, however, it was a rare and wonderful thing. For Karna, it was the only joy that she had within the length of her long, tiring day. With delight she returned the gesture, hugging her mother lovingly before feeling the gentle touch of lips to her cheek.

Then the embrace ended, as though nothing had happened.

"How did you sleep, my daughter?" her mother asked, placing several loaves above the flames.

"Well I thank you, oh my mother and the true delight of my eyes," she replied, hastily pouring the water into a bowl to take to her father. "And you?"

"As well as can be expected."

Karna nodded, quickly kissing her mother's cheek.

She followed the morning ritual of kneeling before her father in the other room. She held the bowl up for him as he washed himself properly. He ignored her as he always did in such a posture, as though she were a lowborn slave and not his daughter.

After he had finished, she returned to the well with a second bucket, leaving the first for her siblings to wash in. By this time, the queue had increased significantly, and when she had returned, the entire family was awake and seated around the low table within the outer room. They watched as Hezal took the loaves off of the fire and served them a meagre breakfast of bread, dried fish, and a single fig for each.

After the morning meal, Tarneesh rose with his sons, taking the loaf his wife offered. He nodded to his daughters and ignored Karna. Barking an order to Kanzeesh, he checked that all the carvings were in the leather bundle and, without a backwards glance; he left for the market with the two boys following in his wake.

With relief, Karna rose and went back into the sleeping room. Smiling, she washed her face and combed the tangles from her long black hair. With deft fingers, she braided it and tidied the blanket upon her pallet before heading back into the other room.

"How fare you this morning, Karna?" the slighter of her two sisters asked, tying a simple necklace about her neck.

"Well, I thank you, Karlis," she replied, brushing the creases from her dress. "How did you sleep?"

"Well enough, though I would love above all things to know how it would feel to sleep upon the silken sheets on a bed in one of Master Tirshan's houses. Can you imagine such fine material against your skin, with a large, soft, goose-feather mattress beneath you rather than one of straw? I should forsake all the riches of the world to have one night's experience of that!"

"Do not dream of things that are never going to happen, Karlis," her mother chastised. "There is no benefit in it. Dream only of that which is within your grasp: a marriage to a fine man and a home of your own. That is something attainable."

Nodding obediently, Karlis lowered her head, though Karna knew she would be hearing more of Karlis' dreams throughout that day…and in far greater detail.

"We had best be off," stated the daughter who had not yet spoken, rising from her seat, "or we shall be late for our work."

"I am glad that _one_ of you has my efficiency, Tarlana," their mother added, patting her daughter gently on the shoulder. She handed each of them a loaf and hurried them from the room.

As they made their way through the back streets and up the various stairways, Karna walked slightly behind her sisters, only half-listening to their conversation concerning young men and their hopes for swift marriages. The object of Karlis' admiration that day was the son of their local butcher: a tall, lanky youth who had apparently smiled at Karlis. This was a gesture that was completely unheard of, and had won Karlis' young heart. She was now well on the way to falling deeply and irrevocably in love with the young man, whom Karna found herself approving of much more than the usual lustful admirers of her youngest sister.

When it came to a certain choice of one of two ways, Karlis implored Karna to allow them to take the one that passed by the meat market. Being the eldest, Karna was automatically responsible for her younger sisters' welfare. It did not take much persuasion that morning, because she was interested to judge the true depth of the young man's affections.

Karna was pleasantly surprised when they arrived. It was obvious that the young man had determined to talk to Karlis. He approached them nervously and greeted them all in the name of Tash, inquiring after their health and that of their family. The whole time they spoke, he cast subtle sideways glances at Karlis—all of which were missed but for one, which she returned with a warm smile.

After several moments though, Karna bid him farewell and hurried her younger sisters away. They passed beneath a great archway and came to the river homes that were owned by the diplomats and noblemen, Tarkaans and Tarkheenas. After passing several of these beautiful homes, they came to a large, handsome building. Around it spread a wide, courtyard-like garden with a merry fountain bubbling in the centre, and fruit trees growing upon a large, smooth lawn of grass.

Instead of entering this home through the gate, they moved toward the side of it and entered a small door cut into the wall at one end. After descending a small flight of stairs, they entered the lower floor of the home; hurrying into a small chamber in which several other girls were changing into beautiful garments of blue and green.

They quickly did the same, taking three other such outfits from the pegs on the wall. Such was expected of the servant girls of great men like Master Tirshan. In Calormen, if one was rich, one showed it off to the best of one's ability, such as through dressing one's servants and slaves in beautiful clothes. These garments were a uniform for the three sisters and each servant girl was expected to dress beautifully and always be clean.

After quickly inspecting one another, the girls filed out of the chamber and down the corridor towards the dining chamber, where their master would meet them and instruct concerning the day's employment. Once there, the head servant girl, a beautiful but rather haughty girl named Kediza, quickly inspected each girl, making sure that all of them were suitably presented for the arrival of their master and the day's work ahead of them.

About a minute later, the doors were swung open and Master Tirshan entered. A small, enormously fat man, he had risen quickly with the favour of the Tisroc after gaining immense wealth through the construction of several homes. The grandest of these was the Tashbaan home of the great Ahoshta Tarkaan, the Grand Vizier. Despite his riches, Tirshan had always failed to gain that which he pretended to have: nobility. Arraying himself as finely as any Tarkaan, he lived under the guise of being a nobleman, referring to himself as one in all but name.

Tirshan entered the dining room, taking in the sight of all the servant girls, brightly arrayed in their fine clothes. They gave him a smug reminder of his wealth, the remembrance of which caused him to puff out his large chest in pride.

"Yestereve, the great Tisroc (may he live forever), saw fit to summon his servant Tirshan, and made a request of him. He informed him of a decision he had made, and that decision was to house his barbarian visitors within one of his servant's humble homes. Thus, it is the will of great Tash (may he be praised) that my home is to be used for the barbarian visitors when they arrive.

"Within the party is the barbarian queen meant to marry the great Prince Rabadash, and with that in mind, many plans will have to be made. For, as the poet says, no great building can be wrought by idle hands; much preparation will need to be done so that the mighty Tisroc (may he live forever) will be honoured before his guests. Thus, the home chosen for the housing of the barbarian guests must be perfectly prepared and carefully maintained during their visit.

"They will be arriving after the fulfilment of the winter months, half-way through the season of the spring, and as such, several alterations will need to be made to the home to make it suitable. It will be the responsibility of you all to clean the home, and keep it clear for the length of their stay. You will also be required to give entertainment upon the evening of the feast I will be holding in welcome of their visit. May Tash the great, the inexorable, the irresistible, deign to hear our prayers this day."

With a nod, he bent his head and raised his arms, reeling off a long, much-used description of Tash's greatness. He followed that with a lengthy prayer to their god, asking him to give guidance to the great Tisroc (may he live forever) on this day, to help them all do him the honour that was his due through their actions.

After the prayer had ended, Master Tirshan swept majestically from the room; his long cape brushing the floor as he strode and the mass of frills that covered his stomach fluttering with every step.

For the remainder of the day, the servant girls could speak of nothing but the barbarian visitors who would be coming with the New Year. Rumours spread throughout the household as the girls whispered excitedly about what the barbarian land was like, of the bewitching beauty of the barbarian queen, and the handsomeness of the pale-skinned men who came from the land far to the north.

"What is the barbarian land called?" Karna's friend Tamara asked.

"I'm not certain, but I think that I heard Kediza refer to it as Narnia," a girl answered, scrubbing at a particularly tough stain.

"Is it true what they say? Is the skin of all the men as pale as cream?" Karlis asked, not focusing upon her work as she tried to imagine such a thing in her mind.

"Apparently," the other girl replied. "It just sounds very strange, doesn't it? I can't imagine what a pale-skinned man would look like."

"I don't think that anyone could look well with pale skin," Tarlana stated, "at least not next to Prince Rabadash."

At this, many of the girls giggled, for it was common knowledge that Tarlana was besotted with the Calormene prince.

"But Tarlana, any man pales in comparison to your prince!" Tamara exclaimed with a giggle.

"Yes, and all of these Narnian men are sure to," Karna added, causing widespread laughter.

"I wonder if the barbarian queen is as beautiful as she is supposed to be."

"She must be to have bewitched Prince Rabadash," Tarlana said loyally. "His judgement cannot be questioned."

"How long ago did he visit the barbarian land, Tarlana?"

"This summer past. He returned with the reaping of the harvest, and now they return the favour."

"Do you think that they will be handsome?" Karlis asked, still fantasizing about the pale men from the north.

"I thought that your thoughts were more filled with that of a certain butcher's son?" Tarlana asked slyly, grinning at her sister's blush.

This caused immediate outbursts from the other servant girls:

"Ahoz! How long have you been interested in the butcher's son, Karlis?"

"He _is_ handsome … has he given you any encouragement?"

"I knew that you would not stay unmarried long. You are the fairest of all of us."

Karlis flushed anew, uncertain how she should answer.

"He smiled at her a few days ago and came up to speak with us this morning. That is all," Karna replied for her sister, shooting a glare at Tarlana.

Karlis gave her a grateful look.

"You seem well suited for each other," Tamara stated, smiling at the younger girl. "Do you like him?"

Karlis finally found her tongue and replied that she did.

"I wish that I could find a husband. I'd give anything to get away from my father's home; the baby screams late into the night, I haven't had a decent night's sleep for weeks," Lamarla said.

"Is your mother still breeding, Lamarla?" Tarlana asked in surprise. "You must have a real houseful now."

The girl nodded, suddenly ashamed of her complaining. "I am now the oldest of nine. Father is struggling to feed us all. Even though my sister and I work, we are running out of room at home."

Karna nodded, thinking of the small amount of floor space that was left within her own home when all of the family was asleep upon the mattresses.

"But if Tash (may he be praised) wills it, then the children are a blessing, Lamarla. It is not for us to question," Tamara stated.

"But if her Father cannot afford to feed the new baby, what is the purpose of its birth? Why would Tash (may he be praised) allow the child to be born?" Karna asked, finding it difficult to understand. "Why create life only to then destroy it through hunger?"

"It is not for us to question the great Tash (may he be praised), Karna. He is God. We cannot question how he decides the loss and creation of life. It is the way he has designed the world, and the way it must be."

Karna was silent for a time, barely listening as the conversation returned to that of the barbarian visitors. She rubbed vigorously at a tile, trying to understand in her mind why a god who created life would seek to destroy it so soon after its birth. It just seemed so wasteful, so meaningless to create life in such conditions, to let innocents suffer a painful fate that they did not deserve.

But then, throughout her life, Karna had asked questions. She had often wondered why people had to dominate one another, forcing others into compliance through violence. One of her earliest memories was of Tarneesh beating her on a night when he had returned home drunk after a particularly bad day at the market. Unprovoked and cruel, he had hit her for merely sleeping across his path.

For many years, she had wondered why he seemed to beat her so much more than her siblings. Why treat Karna differently when she had tried so hard to please him? As she grew, the question festered in her mind, and she would think about it long and hard considering what made her different? As she sought answers, it gradually dawned on her that she _did_ look different than her siblings; she was taller than the rest.

She had the delicate face of her mother as well as her small hands and dark eyes. But when she tried to find a resemblance between Tarneesh and herself, there was none to be found. It had made her question whether there was something…different…about her birth, but she always feared asking about it.

As they walked back to the chamber in which their clothes were hung, she knew she couldn't feel satisfied or accepting anymore. She wanted to know who she was and to have the possibility that she could have something to be glad about. For years she had forced herself to accept a miserable existence; now she wanted to strive for something that would make things change.

After their dismissal that day, the three sisters left the home of Master Tirshan with Tamara and Lamarla. After parting with the two friends at the market, they returned home, arriving just as Hezal was returning from the communal pool with the bed linen.

"I am glad to see you have returned," she said. "There is a great deal to be done. Your Father has been invited to dine with Master Ryadin the butcher and his son. He told me that it was for a very particular reason, and I need your aid, for we have to prepare your Father's best clothes. Karlis take up your needle and embroider your father's best coat more elaborately along the neckline. Tarlana, take out the oil and work a shine into his best shoes. We will not be shamed in front of a man who wishes to invite your father to dinner! Karna, you help me to prepare the cordial that will be one of your Father's gifts of gratitude for the invitation."

The girls obeyed their mother at once, each quickly heading to her allotted task. As soon as Karna and Hezal had begun the steady pulping of the oranges to be used for the cordial, she touched her mother very gently upon the shoulder.

"What is it, Karna? Why do you look at me in such a way?"

Glancing to make sure that both her sisters were in the other room, Karna asked directly: "Mother, who is my real father?"

Stunned, Hezal simply stared at her before closing her eyes tightly. For a moment, her gentle face became pained, and she brought her hand to it, resting her head heavily upon her arms.

"Why do you ask this question now, my daughter?" she asked wearily.

"Please, Mother, I need to know. I know that I cannot be the daughter of your husband."

"But why do you think this?"

"I look at myself, and I see you within me; I see your eyes, see your features, but I see nothing of him. Please, tell me the truth of who I really am."

Finally, Hezal looked up, and Karna saw sadness within those dark eyes that she had never recognized before. For, although they had never had much within their lives beyond the three rooms of Tarneesh's home, Karna had always known her mother to be content and never complaining, always seeing the good in every situation. Through the hardships and poverty of their lives, she had always been constant, giving her daughter the love that she had never received from another person.

"I cannot speak of this now, my daughter, but I will tell you the truth tonight, once my husband has left. We shall find solitude, and I will tell you of what you ask."

The hours that followed passed with agonizing slowness. As she brewed the cordial, Karna grew impatient, believing that it would never thicken as she steadily added the juice of the lemon. Eventually, however, it began to condense, and she was able to add the remaining ingredients, careful to keep it at the same temperature so as to ensure the right consistency.

When it was eventually completed, she was just pouring the finished cordial into a clay jar when Tarneesh entered. Dusty and exultant, he was followed by his two sons, looking satisfyingly empty-handed and pleased with himself.

"Wife," he declared exultantly, "today has been a great day. Not only has the great Tash, the inexorable, the irresistible, given me a great profit, but he has also given me the invitation of the butcher, which may well end with the settling of one of my daughters."

This startled all. Seeing Karlis flush before a quick lowering of her eyes, Karna could easily guess the hopes that dwelt within her heart.

"It is a day of great joy. I have even purchased a special gift so that you might all celebrate in my triumph. Kanzeesh, bring it forward."

Nodding to his father, the eldest son brought forward a large haunch of meat, dumping it upon the floor by the fire.

"I thank you, my generous husband for the gift of this meat. We shall have a bountiful meal tonight in celebration of your success and a great day."

The next hour was spent preparing Tarneesh for his meal, with his entire body being washed, his hair thoroughly cleaned, his skin oiled, and his beard neatly plucked after the current Calormene fashion. His clothes were carefully scented with cyclamen to give them freshness, his turban was one of new material, and after slipping into his newly shined clogs, Tarneesh swept as majestically from the home as any Tarkaan. In front of him, Kanzeesh bore a torch as he strode through the streets.

"Do you think that great Tash (may he be praised) would bless me with such a marriage, Mother?" Karlis asked as they ate their evening meal, half of the meat, which had been carefully spitted and turned gradually by their mother for the past hour so that it was tender.

"If great Tash (may he be praised) wills it, I am certain that it will happen, my daughter." She smiled at the obvious joy that the prospect of the marriage brought her daughter.

Karna watched her younger sister with a great happiness. There was little fondness found in Calormene marriages, and love matches were unheard of. Normally, the parents, based upon the financial standing of each family, reached a marriage settlement. It was a rare pleasure for a possible bride-to-be as young as Karlis, still full of romantic ideas, to be so glad at the prospect of a marriage.

"What think you of young Ahoz, oh my sister?" Kanzeesh asked, savouring the rare taste of freshly roasted meat.

"I think him very strong and capable, oh my brother," Karlis replied, careful to give the expected answer. "He would be a good husband, and I will try to be a good wife to him if an understanding is reached."

Nodding in satisfaction at her answer, Kanzeesh rose with Andur. After nodding to their mother, they left to visit the local tavern.

Karna and her mother were able to slip out of the house soon after the boys' departure, heading out under the excuse of going to draw water. They moved in that general direction but stole quickly into a deserted back street. Once there, they settled themselves upon some steps, and Karna waited, watching her mother's profile in the fading light, suddenly noticing the fine lines that had cut into the smooth skin of her face with the lengthening of years.

Her mother turned to her, the same sorrow of earlier returning to her eyes as she stared upon her eldest child for a long moment. She seemed to meditate upon Karna's features. After a time, she reached out and traced Karna's face with a finger, slowly moving over her forehead and down her nose, to softly cup her cheek. She dropped her hand soon after, a bitter smile crossing her lips.

"You have so much of him within you, Karna. You may have my eyes, but you have his nose. You have his litheness of movement, his grace and poise." Her smile softened. "And his generous spirit."

She lowered her eyes, sighing, and after drawing her shawl closer about her shoulders, continued, "Your father was a great man, one of the most celebrated warriors of all Tashbaan in his day. He was called Harradin. No one could best him in swordplay. He was so swift and agile, he moved with such ease and grace that he made it seem more like a dance rather than actual sparring.

"He won renown for his talent, prestige in battle, a reputation for honour and valour. When we married, I was the bastard daughter of a Tarkaan, but he was kind to me. He taught me what it meant to be loved. He was such a rare man, so gentle and considerate. There was none like him.

"When I found myself to be pregnant, we were overjoyed. When you were born, he held you tenderly in his arms, loving you beyond any other thing, promising to always protect you. He named you Karna after my mother; such was the measure of his love for us both.

"Then, in a great battle, when the fighting was ended. The Tisroc (may he live forever) had been victorious, and as a special honour, your father was called upon to cut the enemy's head from his shoulders; but he refused. He would not kill an unarmed and bound man. Tisroc (may he live forever) commanded it, yet he still refused, and for it, he was struck down instead of the enemy. He was immediately declared a traitor, and we were left with nothing.

"Everything was confiscated; our beautiful home with the rooftop garden, his horses, and our possessions. I was sent back to my father's house in disgrace, with a year-old daughter, the only child of a traitor. They tried to take you from me, but when I refused, my father forsook me. He declared that I was no daughter of his and married me off to the first man he saw in the street. In the end, it turned out to be Tarneesh, and he has been a good husband. He has provided for me, kept a roof over both of our heads, and I have bourn him four children of his own.

"So the outcome could have been far worse. Great Tash (may he be praised) has blessed us both and provided us with everything that we need. I have learned to be content, and so must you, my daughter. If Karlis marries Ahoz, there will be one less mouth to feed. We shall be able to save money and add them to the funds my husband has already saved so that Kanzeesh may take a bride. It will be well for us. I can sense it."

Karna was silent for a time; sitting motionless, she drew her knees up to her chest and hugged them, slowly digesting the truth of who her father had truly been.

"Why have you never spoken of this before, oh my mother?" she asked, still staring at the ground.

"Because that is past. Tarneesh is your father now; you never knew Harradin, and I thought it best that he be kept from you. I thought it might help you to accept your existence, without having delusions as to what could have been."

"But what would have been so wrong with those delusions?" Karna asked, suddenly angry. "What would have been wrong with giving me something to dream of? Tarneesh does not love me, mother, he never has. He will always resent my sleeping under his roof. I will always act as the reminder of how he married the widow of a traitor."

"Do not speak so of Harradin! How dare you?"

Karna saw the fury in her mother's eyes, at once regretting her outburst.

"Harradin was no traitor. He merely sought to show mercy to a man who deserved none; that is true courage. Never did he kill merely for the pleasure of it. He only took life in the defence of his land or family.

"I kept his existence from you for your own good. The delusions of which you speak would have given you no relief, Karna, only embittered you to the life you live. Dreams such as these are not healthy. We cannot live in a dream. It is true that we might find joy for a time in this life, but it does not last, and this is how great Tash (may he be praised) has deigned it to be."

Slowly taking Karna's face in her hands, she raised it to look into the tear-stained eyes. With incredible gentleness, she kissed her forehead before taking her daughter in her arms.

"I know that you suffer, dear one, but see the good, for we have a roof over our heads and food to eat. I have wept for my dear husband, and I will fight every day to see you have a life filled with greater joy than my own. But know, Karna, it will probably not happen. So hope for joy, my daughter, but be content with what life gives you."

Karna felt the soft touch of her mother's fingers wiping the tears from her cheeks. She looked into that sweet, gentle face, seeing the love that shone from her eyes. As a child might, she flung her arms about her mother's neck.

In that dark, deserted street, she wept dry the hopeless tears of eighteen years.


	3. The Strength to Endure

Daring to Dream

Chapter Two

The Stength to Endure

Karna suddenly awoke the day of Karlis' wedding, sticky and hot from the stuffiness of the sleeping room in her family's home. She picked her way quietly between the straw mattresses and entered the other room. She picked up the cracked jug which sat upon the table and rinsed her face.

A long moment passed before she noticed Karlis, sitting hunched up and alone in a corner. In surprise, Karna moved toward her sister and knelt beside her, placing a gentle hand upon her shoulder. Karlis jumped visibly and turned with wild eyes to stare at her sister.

All at once, Karna saw how truly young Karlis was. When she had been younger, Karlis had been a sweet, chubby child who always laughed and giggled. She had been able to charm even the gruffest of old men. That child had grown into this beautiful fourteen-year-old young woman, but Karna now saw the child that still lurked beneath. She saw the girl who was nearly, but not quite yet, a woman.

"Why do you cry, dear one?" she asked, gently wiping away the tears. "What are you afraid of?"

Karlis stared at Karna before visibly crumbling and sobbing softly onto her sister's shoulder. In response, Karna rocked her as she once had when she was little. After a time, her sobs stilled, and Karlis looked at her oldest sister with scared red eyes.

"Oh, Karna, I know that I should be joyful for this chance, for this marriage to a man for whom I truly care … but I am afraid. I do not feel ready … I … I have never had a home of my own, and I have no experience of men …"

Gently, Karna hugged her sister, wishing that there were some way to just delay the wedding for a few months, a year maybe, to give Karlis some time to grow up. But there was none.

"Oh my sister," she said, tenderly stroking Karlis' hair, "you know that Ahoz is a good man, and he truly cares for you. You have no reason to fear. Do not cry, my dear one. Tash smiled upon you and has blessed this marriage; you shall be happy.

"Just imagine it. You shall have a home and just Ahoz to feed. There will not be seven people sleeping within one room, but just the two of you. You shall be able to feed and cook for one man, to start a family of your own. You are greatly blessed, oh my sister."

Karlis was still for a moment. Gradually the truth of Karna's words dawned upon her.

However, before she could speak, Tarneesh strode into the room. To the surprise of both sisters, he placed his hand upon Karlis' head, coming closer to a caress than he had ever before.

"Oh my daughter, this is a great day. To see you married to so worthy a man is proof of Tash's benevolence and goodness. May you prosper."

Karlis lowered her eyes, thanking her father as submissive daughter should.

Tarneesh actually smiled for a moment and nodded to her—before he glowered at Karna. "Fetch water, and hurry about it! We want none of your usual dawdling on so important a day as this."

* * *

After a hurried preparation, the bride's family was ready to accept the wedding guests for the breakfast. In view of all, Karlis received her father's blessing.

Dressed in an ornamented gown of red and gold, she looked beautiful. A simple wreath of flowers crowned her dark hair, with a gauzy veil pinned beneath them. A necklace of bronze and silver coins adorned her neck, representative of her dowry, with earrings of real silver hanging from her ears.

When the blessing finished, the bridal party left the home of Tarneesh, chanting and singing as the bride was led down the streets to the home of her husband-to-be's family. There, amongst the flowers and well wishers, Ahoz and Karlis said their vows, praying that would Tash bless their union. They were overseen by the local elders, old men respected among the local community who nodded solemnly upon the finishing of the ceremony.

Thus, Karlis was married. After the wedding dinner, the couple were led away to their new home, a couple of rooms that had been purchased within another back alley not far from the meat market, though a fifteen minute walk from her old home. When the family started departing, the goodbyes were reserved and lacked emotion, as farewells in Calormen were expected to be.

Karlis managed the farewells with the expected solemnity, but her face fell a little at the departure of her mother and sisters. Seeing this, Karna dared the wrath of her step-father and kissed her sister a final time before the wedding party departed, leaving the couple alone for the night.

When within the privacy of his own home, Tarneesh gave full vent of his anger upon Karna for her rash action.

"Had you no thought for the honour of our family, you stupid girl?" he demanded. "Do you know how blemished our honour is now, thanks to your burst of emotion, you piece of filth?"

As he advanced, she backed away, fearing the wrath that blazed in his eyes.

"I sought only to comfort her…" she began, only to be struck so hard across the face that she was knocked off her feet. Hezal and Tarlana started forward, but a single look from Tarneesh was enough to still them.

"You will speak only when you are spoken to, you bastard! I should never have taken in so ungrateful a tramp as you. Your mother has done well, bourn me four children, but what good have you ever done? No, you only consume my food, eat away at the money that I need to feed my own family. You are worthless, you have no value, and you are the spawn of a traitor." So enraged was Tarneesh that he kicked out at Karna, catching her hard against her side.

Terrified, Karna curled up, desperately trying to protect her head with her arms as he continued to kick her. In the end, Tarneesh ceased, his anger abated, and left Karna upon the floor. Without a backward look, he strode into the next room, shouting to his wife for warm water.

Only when her husband had finally been prepared for bed and was soundly asleep, did Hezal dare to approach Karna. Tenderly, she bathed her daughter's face with warm water until she regained consciousness.

Karna wept silently as her mother tended her bruises and cuts with a special cream. Utterly desolate and alone, she longed to escape from her world of worthlessness and pain.

At the feel of another's touch, she opened her eyes to find the sorrowful gaze of Tarlana watching as she gently stroked her hair. She had dared the wrath of her father to come and comfort her step-sister. This simple gesture touched Karna more deeply than she had expected, bringing fresh tears to her eyes, but this time, tears of gladness in the midst of her despair.

* * *

In the morning, Karna was so badly bruised that she could hardly walk. Tarlana was sent to work alone, being ordered to beg illness on behalf of her sister for the remainder of the week. Tarneesh left with a dissatisfied grunt that morning, muttering of the inconvenience caused by it all.

It was not until the house was deserted that his wife dared to enter the second room and saw the full extent of her eldest daughter's injuries, which had darkened and become more pronounced in the day's light. Tears threatened at the sight of the huge bruise that had swollen so much around Karna's right eye that it was almost shut. Her left side were so badly bruised that it was darkened all over from the repeated kicking. But despite it all, Karna smiled at the sight of her mother, wincing as she attempted to arise. Hezal pushed her back down gently.

"No, rest my daughter," she said firmly, moving to tuck the thin blanket closer about Karna's thin frame. "You need to rest. Do not try to rise, or you will injure yourself further."

Karna complied and tried lying as comfortably as she could, difficult as it was with her injuries. She was forced to lie on her right hand side, facing away from the doorway. She took the broth her mother brought her, finding that she had no appetite. She had seen the fear that lingered in Hezal's gentle eyes and wished above all else to soothe it.

Her mother was so content and cheerful in nature that she was seldom saddened. When she was, it was always on account of others' grief, not for her own sake. She had endured such hardship in her life, and yet she was still positive, accepting her lot in life with grace—a grace that Karna did not possess.

Despite the possible consequences, Karna always acted without thought, finding herself unable to endure the thought of her life never changing for the better. She knew that, regardless of what happened, she would always fight for the chance to find that freedom and love that she sought, and to find the same for those she loved.

The week passed slowly, but with each day, Karna grew in strength and her bruises slowly changed from darkened shades of black and blue to that of yellow as they began to fade. Upon the third day, her friend Tamara came asking after her, and though she knew her husband would forbid it, Karna's mother allowed the friends a few minutes speech together.

Even though she was shocked at the state of Karna's face, Tamara did not ask the cause, but instead told her friend of the goings-on of work. Eagerly, she told of the earlier expected arrival of two barbarian lords ahead of the larger party, so as to inspect the lodgings set aside for the coming of the barbarian queen. Now the work had begun in earnest. They were expected to clean the house with even greater speed and thoroughness than first told.

When Tamara left, she cast a final, sorrowful glance at Karna, her eyes saying what she did not dare speak aloud. She pitied her friend and wished that she could aid her in some way, but was forbidden to do so.

In those hours that passed between the return of Tarlana from work and that of Tarneesh and his sons from the market, Tarlana would sit with her. Carefully going about her allotted tasks, she would keep her stepsister company and speak honestly of how she missed her company throughout the long hours of the day. These simple, honestly spoken words touched Karna's heart and brought about an intimacy between the two sisters that had never previously existed.

"Do you miss Karlis?" Tarlana asked on the second afternoon after Tamara's visit, six days since Karna had become bed-ridden.

Sighing gently, Karna nodded. "Very much. She always used to make me smile."

Tarlana agreed, pausing in her cutting of vegetables for a moment. "Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and wait to hear her breathing beside me, and when I don't, I wonder where she is. Then I remember that she's never coming back."

Karna reached over to take her sister's hand in her own, hearing the grief in her voice. "We all miss her terribly, Tarlana, but she has a husband who cares for her. May Tash (may he be praised) grant us the same blessing in life as she has had."

Tarlana smiled despite herself. "My longing shall not be fulfilled unless Prince Rabadash wishes to marry into the family of a carver."

Karna laughed, glad to see her sister's change in mood. "Have you heard anything more concerning the barbarian lords?" She had found herself considering the foreigners a lot within her hours of solitude.

"Yes," Tarlana replied eagerly, "they are coming half way through the cycle of the next new moon. I am so curious to know what a pale-skinned man will look like. I try and imagine, but I can never picture it in my mind."

Karna smiled. "I find it difficult, too. But I always find myself imagining them with lighter eyes for some reason, not dark brown or black, but pale brown, almost the colour of freshly ground cinnamon."

"Kediza told us that she has heard Master Tirshan speaking to a friend, and apparently he has heard that the barbarian queen has eyes of green."

"Green?" Karna exclaimed in astonishment. "You mean as the lawns of grass that cover the Tarkaans' and Tarkheenas' gardens? I would not have imagined such a thing to be real."

Tarlana grinned. "I know, I look forward to seeing them. It will be interesting to see if the rumours prove true."

That night, Karna lay awake for several hours, struggling to sleep. Although her bruises had healed substantially, they still caused her discomfort. On top of that, she had also developed a continuous headache from her confinement in the stuffy back room of the home. Desperate to escape from it, she attempted to rise. Though her legs were at first too numb to move after days of having lain in the same position, she eventually managed to stand, and leaning heavily upon the rickety table, she rose to her feet.

To her surprise, she found that she could stand and bear the pain that shot through the legs, which, though acute, was bearable. With a growing resolve, she moved steadily towards the doorway, careful not to touch any of the sleeping forms upon the mattresses. When in the doorway, she paused for a moment, taking time to catch her breath before slowly limping towards the entrance. Each step was an effort in itself, until she finally reached the flimsy wooden frame, and drew back the bolt. She found herself able to open it with surprising ease.

Once she had left the stuffiness of the home, Karna felt her face touched by the gentle kiss of the night air. Cool and refreshing, the heat of the day had finally given way. To her, it was like the first trickle of water down her throat after days of wandering in the desert. She stood for a time, merely basking in the stillness and calm of the night, away from the crowded heat and sweaty bodies of the room, savouring the peace that the darkness always brought.

Without knowing why, she started to walk, oblivious to everything but the need to move. Not knowing how she was able to do it with such fluidity, she found herself hurrying down the streets. Her pain and bruises were forgotten as she simply walked, desperate to reach her destination, but not knowing where it was.

She stole through the dark, deserted streets, finding herself moving past closed, shadowy doorways and across empty squares. After a time, she became aware of moving roughly in the direction of the river. Before she knew it, she had entered an archway and was walking upon the smooth stone of a courtyard. In the centre, a fountain splashed.

She stood for a moment, merely watching the water fall into the smooth stone of the bowl. The very sight of it refreshed her. The moonlight slanted across the garden, gleaming its pale light upon the fountain, making the water seem like a fall of pure silver.

Karna froze, suddenly sensing another presence in the garden. She spun around and gasped in fear, for upon the carefully-tended lawn of grass stood the biggest creature she had ever seen. Despite the pale light that flooded the courtyard, his shaggy coat shone golden-brown. Its eyes were large, and to her astonishment were filled with something that could only be described as love and compassion. Yet despite the lethal teeth that showed below the cat's lip and the claws that protruded from his paws, she felt no fear, only reassurance from his presence.

Motionless, she stayed where she was, waiting for the animal to act, yet at the same time, knowing in her heart that he would not hurt her.

Silently, he padded towards her across the grass. He was tall—so tall that his eyes were level with hers. He slowly licked away the tears that she had not realised were staining her cheeks. An incredible peace filled Karna at his touch, and without thought, she put her arms about his proud neck. She began to weep wretchedly into his thick fur, feeling his tongue still licking away her tears as she sobbed away a week's pain and fear.

After a time, the tears stopped, and she drew back, simply staring into those great golden eyes. She did not understanding the calm that had entered her heart, but knew that she could now endure another day because of it. Wordlessly, she reached out and stroked the lion's shaggy mane, hearing an undeniable purr erupt, deep within the huge cat's throat.

"Thank you," she said, knowing that he understood. She longed to stay here with this great cat forever, to simply be looked upon with those great eyes, so large and filled with compassion and love, so wonderful and yet unknown in her world. For a moment, she stood there, watching the lion, loving him for some unknown reason, before reality reasserted itself. Staggering, she suddenly realised that the pain was back as her leg throbbed.

Karna felt tears coming once more as the pain grew worse and she was forced to stumble across the courtyard toward the archway. But in a few strides, the lion had crossed the pavement and was barring her way.

For the first time, she felt scared.

"No, I must!" she exclaimed. "Please, let me go."

The lion did not respond and he remained where he was, simply watching her.

Desperately, Karna tried to stumble around him, but the lion merely stepped in front of her, blocking her way. In a last attempt, she limped back in the other direction, and again, the lion barred her path. But this time, he did not pause in front of her, but continued to advance, forcing Karna to stumble back until she felt the grass beneath her feet. In a sudden, fluid gesture, the huge cat had approached her. Almost gently, he pushed her to the ground so that she sat. His large, shaggy head loomed over her, filling her entire vision.

With a sudden terror, Karna covered her face with her hands, trembling so much that she visibly shook … until she felt the touch of warm breath to her hands, and slowly drew them away to see the lion watching her. He breathed on her, but instead of rancid and stale as she would have expected, his breath was sweet and lovely to smell, seeming to warm her from within.

In amazement, Karna stared, transfixed, as he lowered his head, and gently nosed her skirt up so that the bottom of her legs were bare. After this, he gently licked her bruises, and with this tender touch, wrought a soothing throughout her entire body. Without knowing how, Karna felt her pain go, and stared at the great cat in amazement: he had healed her completely! In confusion, she felt her cheek, and realised that the bruise was gone. She stared at her leg and saw the discolouration had vanished.

She looked up and saw that he was staring at her once more, his great gold eyes gentle, still filled with that love.

"Thank you," she said again, wanting to express her gratitude.

In the moment that followed, she could have sworn that she heard the words, "Peace, dear one," spoken, though she immediately banished the notion as ludicrous.

Then, with a final look, the lion suddenly turned and sprang away into the night, gone as suddenly as he had come.

* * *

Author's note:

Hi, I apologise for the violence used in the prologue, but I wanted to set the reality behind this story.

One reason for writing this is to explore the working class culture of Calormen. I find the Calormen perception of the Narnians fascinating and have always wanted to explore the character of Peridan who is one of the few human lords mentioned by name during stories of the Golden Age.

We'll be meeting Peridan next chapter – after the little cameo from Aslan

Thanks for all those following this story, it would be awesome to have a couple of reviews. Please let me know what you think!

Thanks,

Breeze.


	4. Journeying into the Unknown

Daring to Dream

Chapter Three

Journeying into the Unknown

Though he was loath to admit it, Lord Peridan of Narnia hated sea-faring.

Tall, broad-shouldered, and strong, he was among the finest warriors of his land. He was a shrewd and learned diplomat, as well as a lord of high renown. He was widely respected, and yet he found himself nauseated by the mere pitching of waves upon the sea.

In particular, he associated his violent seasickness with his first experience of sailing. He had been but a lad of twelve, eager and excited about his first voyage over the sea. He had spent the night before their journey celebrating with his friends, sharing some stolen ale and feeling very grown up indeed. However, the next day they had not been half an hour out to sea when he had felt the ale returning and had vomited heavily over the side of the boat—and had continued to do so until they had reached their destination.

Thus had it been for the past fifteen years of his life, and though he had grown more accustomed to the pitching and tipping of the deck with frequent sea-going, he had yet to undertake a voyage where he did not experience the nausea at least once. This one was no different.

Now leaning upon the wooden rail of the small ship, he watched the horizon, blue and hazy in the bright sunlight, thinking longingly of the green hills and deep forest of the land that he loved. In his mind's eye, he pictured Cair Paravel in the summer months. A tall, magnificent castle, situated high upon a crest of hills that rolled to the shore…the warm, golden sand glistening in the sunshine. The trees rustling gently in the light breeze as the castle's inhabitants went about their business beneath the boughs.

Smiling to himself, he imagined galloping across the green country on the back of his stallion. He saw the High King Peter and his brother King Edmund riding alongside him. The kings were dear friends of his boyhood, and they had grown into manhood together. He clearly remembered the day when he had ridden into Narnia with his father, leaving his birthplace of Archenland and offering his sword in the protection of the neighbouring country. He had felt a strange kinship with these great lords of men.

"Land ho!"

Peridan jerked free of his reverie, turning to stare at the thin strip of pale land that was Calormen. Though he tried, he was unable to stop his heart from sinking somewhat at the sight of its sandy shores. Though he would be glad to have solid ground beneath his feet once more, he did not like the mission that lay ahead of them. They were called to act as ambassadors for his country, to see that everything was prepared before the arrival of Queen Susan.

He clearly recalled the previous visit of Prince Rabadash to Narnia within the summer months. He had found himself distrusting the almost smarmy countenance of the Calormene prince. There was dishonesty to the prince's kindness that had put Peridan instantly upon his guard. Further discussion with his friends had revealed a similar suspicion within the hearts of both the fair queen's brothers.

He had even spoken to her of it himself, having always thought of her as a sister. Susan had smiled and thanked him for his care of her, but was convinced of the sincerity of Rabadash's kindness. She had been greatly flattered by Rabadash's treatment and respect of her, and had taken a liking to his considerate manner and gallantry.

But now that he saw the land of Calormen, the doubt returned. He considered how the Queen Susan's sweetness and innocence had often been thought to add to her loveliness, making her seem all the more appealing.

In appearance, she was undoubtedly lovely, having long, flowing hair of the darkest brown; a pale, smooth complexion; and eyes of the brightest green. Added to the slender grace of her figure, it could easily be understood why so many kings from distant lands had sought her hand in marriage. So loving was she, and so gentle, that the mere thought of anyone trying to hurt her brought a fierce anger to Peridan's heart.

From that moment, he vowed that he would never let Rabadash hurt her; with all his might he would protect her from anyone who might wish her harm.

* * *

Karna awoke refreshed and not a little confused. With amazement, she found her bruises healed and the discolouring of her cheek faded. Hezal showed no less amazement.

"But how did they heal so completely overnight?" she exclaimed. "I would not have thought it possible!"

"Neither I," Karna murmured. She said nothing of the lion.

Tarneesh's response on seeing her healed was, as predicted, an immediate command for her to return to work. For the first time in a long while, Karna wholeheartedly agreed with him. She was eager to leave the confines of the house.

Unable to keep from smiling at her daughter's enthusiasm, Hezal allowed her the chore of going to fetch the water. She struggled to keep from almost laughing at the way that Karna almost skipped out of the doorway. Had Karna not been respectful and very careful of the custom of their land, she was certain that she would have heard her daughter singing all the way to the well.

Her welcome back to her work was no less joyful than her exuberance that morning. All about her, the girls praised Tash for her quick recovery and hoped that she would ever enjoy good health. Karna thanked them with a wide smile..

The day was a busy one, being the final day before the arrival of the barbarian lords. The home was a veritable hive of activity, with every floor and wall being polished. Even the courtyard was given a layer of oil to make the paving slabs smooth and gleaming in the sunlight. The girls were set to scrubbing the floors of the great house in the morning, and then they needed to practise the dance that they would be doing upon the night of the feast, celebrating the arrival of the Narnian lords.

Thankful that she had been gifted with the grace of her mother, Karna had picked the dance up quickly and was able to join in with the others in the graceful swaying and twirling that was central to their land's traditional dance.

When they had finally completed what felt like their fiftieth rehearsal and had satisfied Kediza, they left. Tired, but pleased with the way that they had performed that day.

Tarlana in particular was greatly excited by the prospect of the barbarian lords' coming on the morrow. She came close to bouncing down the dirty streets as they walked home, smiling and speaking excitedly of what the lords would look like. Upon arriving home, there was another surprise for them.

"Karlis!" Karna actually squealed, rushing to embrace her sister.

Karlis returned the embrace with a smile, even allowing herself a quick kiss upon her sister's cheek.

"When did you come?" Tarlana asked, moving to hug her sister as well.

"Ahoz is working late within the meat market. He thought that it would be enjoyable for me to visit my family. I am so grateful to him, for there is nothing that I would have rather done."

Their mother smiled, motioning for them all to sit as she poured tea. "She came only a few minutes ago from the hope that she would catch you after finishing work."

"And how are you?" Karna asked

Karlis smiled brightly. "I have never been happier … oh Karna! I had never imagined how wonderful it would be to have an entire home of my own with just Ahoz and I. I feel almost greedy having such a great amount of space for simply the two of us. He is the kindest and most wonderful of men, so gentle and tender. I have never thought to be so blessed by Tash (may he be praised) within the marriage state. I am blessed indeed to have such a husband."

All three women smiled at Karlis, their happiness at her joy clear in their eyes.

"I could not have prayed to Tash (may he be praised) for more great a joy that this," their mother stated. "To see you so happy, Karlis, gives me the strength to endure any hardship. My contentment for you is complete."

"If only we could all hope for such joy in our marriages," Karna commented, hugging her knees to her chest.

"All works out according to Tash's will (may he be praised), oh my daughter. You must accept your lot in life, and be grateful for the joys that you have within it."

"But I do not understand how I can put my hope in Tash (may he be praised). I don't understand how he can be so cruel to some, and so kind to others. Why would he create life only to see it destroyed before it can truly live? Did I not tell you of the death of Maralis' baby? He died of a fever just last night, and he was born but a week ago. Why take life when it has only just begun to live?".

"My daughter, if you understood the ways of Tash (may he be praised) and how he is, how would he be god? We are not meant to understand why things happen. If we did, that would make us equals to Tash, the inexorable, the irresistible."

"But mother …"

"Peace, my daughter. It is not for us to question Tash (may he be praised). Be grateful that you have a roof over your head and food to eat."

"Yes, oh my mother," Karna replied, lowering her eyes submissively as was expected. She did not wish to argue with the one whom she loved above all others. She had found herself wondering about things that day as she had worked, and could not understand why the baby had had to die. Why did Maralis have to go through such pain a mere week after giving birth?

Karna sat for a while, silent as the others began to prepare dinner. She curiously ran a hand over her leg and, lifting her skirt, stared at the skin. She moved her hand to touch her cheek and marvelled that the skin had healed under the simple touch of the lion's tongue.

But it had not just been the bruising and aching that had healed. Within her heart she had felt a strengthening and a peace settle upon her as the lion's sweet breath had touched her face. She had felt the courage to live for the next day, to go on. Something about that lion had touched her. She did not know how, but he had seemed to almost understand her suffering.

"Karna! Why are you so dreamy this day? I have already asked you three times to take the bucket and fetch some water from the well."

Startled, Karna apologised quickly.

She determined to put the lion out of her head until she had the time to dwell upon him without interruption.

* * *

Tarneesh returned from the market that evening in a foul mood, having sold less that half of his carvings that day. He exhausted the mood by raging at his entire family. No one was spared, least of all Karna, who got the brunt of a full hour-long tirade after she accidentally knocked a pail of water over.

Tarneesh's anger finally abated and he received his meal without comment, grunting at his wife to fill his cup with more ale. He asked Tarlana about the arrival of the barbarian lords on the morrow. She eagerly replied, telling him of how two lords and a small escort of warriors were arriving, having been sent ahead by their king to make sure that everything was prepared for the arrival of their queen.

"What is the purpose of sending men ahead to 'prepare'?" Tarneesh demanded, drinking heavily from his cup. "Do they not think that our great Tisroc, may he live forever, would not have known to make the appropriate preparations for the arrival of our Prince's betrothed?"

None of the family spoke.

"I suppose that this barbarian queen is supposed to be more beautiful than any creature that was ever seen within our great land of Calormen?" he continued, taking another lengthy swig of ale. "I do not know how a woman with pale skin could be seen as fair, but I suppose that there must be something lovely about her for our noble and courageous Prince Rabadash to have chosen her. Do you not think so, wife?" Tarneesh asked, suddenly regarding his wife in a manner that made her blush and avert her gaze. "Well? What say you?"

"I expect that she is very beautiful, oh my husband," his wife replied, colouring, her eyes lowered.

Tarneesh rose, ordering his sons to go to the tavern and his daughters to both go and get more water.

"Leave that," he barked at Karna, who had been in the process of wiping up the water. "I wish to be alone with my wife."

Suddenly fearful for her mother, Karna attempted to take as much time as she could in putting away the rag and pail, to only be rewarded with a cuff around the head for her trouble.

"Get out, now!" her step-father ordered, pushing both the girls outside roughly. "Don't come back for at least an hour."

Karna spun around, only getting a single glimpse of her mother's anxious face before the door was slammed in their faces.

"I hate it when he does that," she said, after their brothers had stumbled off to the tavern.

Karna's sister brushed the dust off herself and nodded. "But, my sister, it is a husband's right," she stated.

"Did you not see our mother's face, Tarlana? She always looks so fearful when he gets that glint in his eye. I saw none of it within Karlis' eye this day."

"Maybe it is different with each man?" Tarlana suggested. "I do not know what happens, but maybe every marriage is different. How can we know until our father has chosen a husband for us? It is something private, only to be shared between husband and wife."

Reluctantly, Karna forced herself to nod, falling slowly into step beside her sister as they headed absently in the direction of the well. They nodded greetings to their neighbours as they passed, eventually coming to pause outside the home of Tamara's father.

"Should we ask if Tamara is allowed to join us?" Tarlana suggested.

Karna considered it, and knocked.

A flustered-looking Maralis opened the door.

"Good evening, Maralis, in the name of Tash (may he be praised). How fares your family?"

"Well, I thank you, Karna, in the name of Tash, (may he be praised). How fares your family?"

"They are all well, I thank you. We came to ask whether Tamara might join us this evening for a walk to the well?"

Glancing over her shoulder, Maralis nodded. She called for her daughter to bring the pail. "I hope you have an enjoyable walk," she added before softly closing the door.

Tamara regarded her friends in surprise. "What did my mother just do?" she asked.

Karna grinned. "She gave you permission to spend some time with us this evening."

Realisation suddenly dawned on Tamara, causing her to grin. "Were you banished from your home?"

The sisters nodded. "We are supposed to spend an hour fetching water."

Tamara nodded in understanding. "It is often the same within my father's home. Although it is somewhat harder for me, having to keep a six and an eight-year-old entertained. My little brothers get bored."

Happily, the three girls walked along the narrow back streets together, talking, laughing quietly, and enjoying the quiet of the evening. They revelled in the joy of merely being able to be together without the pressure of having to work.

"I am anxious about the dancing tomorrow," Tarlana admitted when they had finally reached the well and were perching upon the rough stone edge. "I find it difficult to move with the grace that the rest of you have. I am so much larger in build."

"Oh, Tarlana, that is ridiculous," Karna exclaimed, regarding her sister's figure. "You move with perfect fluidity and grace. It is I who look ridiculous, for I am so tall and awkward."

"Karna, now you are being ridiculous," Tamara stated. "You are the most graceful of us all."

"Indeed I am not," Karna declared. "I have none of Kediza's sensuality, or any of your good footwork, Tamara. You are so light on your feet."

"I think you are both ridiculous to argue over something that does not apply to either of you," Tamara said sensibly. "You both dance well enough to delight all the barbarian lords in the world. I think it is in every girl's personality to doubt some aspect of herself, so it is nothing to dwell upon or encourage. We all find fault with ourselves, but we do not improve the situation or change it by complaining."

Neither Karna nor Tarlana could fault Tamara's irrefutable logic and gave way, seeing the stupidity of their argument.

Ever the peacemaker, Tamara steered the conversation back to safer territory, namely that of the barbarian lords. The disagreement was then forgotten as soon as it had been started.

"How many are arriving tomorrow?" Karna asked.

"Two," Tarlana replied at once. "The greater of the two lords is supposed to be a close friend of the kings of the barbarian land. Both of them are brothers to the barbarian queen. They also bring with them a small escort of warriors, though merely for protection, not as a threat."

"Why would they feel threatened?"

Tarlana shrugged. "I suppose because they fear the greatness of Tisroc (may he live forever) and the great Prince Rabadash."

"What is the name of the barbarian queen?" Tamara asked. "Has she some strange sounding name?"

"Well, I think it's rather plain, personally," Tarlana answered, "but I suppose if Prince Rabadash finds her attractive, it should not cause us to think less of her."

"But what is it?" Tamara persisted.

"The barbarian queen is named Susan."

"Susan? What sort of a name is that?"

"It _does_ have a very peculiar sound to it," Karna agreed. "But what of the lord? Did you hear of his name?"

Tarlana shook her head. "I only overheard Kediza speaking of Prince Rabadash's betrothed."

"I cannot wait to see her. I often find myself wondering about the barbarian land and what it must be like to live there. Don't you ever wish you could experience different lands beyond Calormen?"

Tamara and Tarlana stared at Karna in surprise.

"Why, my sister, would you wish to live in or even visit in a barbarian land that is void of all civilised society and living? I overheard Master Tirshan speaking of the strange land they hail from. Apparently they do not worship Tash (may he be praised), the inexorable and irresistible, but a _lion_."

"A lion?" Karna's eyes widened as memories from last night filled her mind. Could it be that she had met this god last night? "They worship a _lion_?"

Tarlana merely nodded.

"Are you well, Karna?" Tamara asked. "You've gone pale, and you're shaking."

Karna shuddered, forcing herself to focus. She eventually managed a pained smile. "I am well, thank you, Tamara. It simply seems so strange to worship a lion rather than the creator of this earth."

"Maybe it is some demon," Tamara suggested. "Are you sure that you are well, Karna? Do you fear lions?"

Karna almost laughed. "No, I thank you Tamara, I truly am well. Simply surprised that the barbarians worship a lion instead of Tash."

Tarlana shrugged. "I suppose that they are not named barbarians without reason."

"Do you think it is true that their men do not even wear turbans and shave off their beards to appear bare-faced as boys?" Tamara asked.

Tarlana nodded gravely. "I have heard the same; there is little wonder then why it is referred to as a barbarian land when they don't have even a knowledge of common decency."

"Why on earth would they do freely that which is considered a public humiliation?" Karna wondered. "Did not Lamarla's father have his beard plucked out when he was caught stealing? Why do such a thing voluntarily?"

Tarlana shrugged darkly. "Are we meant to understand the way of barbarians? Don't worry about it. They are different and not worthy of such thoughts."

Karna nodded, saying no more, but completely confused. She was unable to understand why these barbarians were so different.

How was it that a lion had healed her, just the night before? Why had he done it? Who was he?

* * *

Though he had been hoping, praying to Aslan for some relief, Lord Peridan knew how their welcome to Calormen would be, and he had been entirely right. Overly lavish and fussily fancy, they had been forced to endure a lengthy, condescending speech from the Grand Vizier, a man named Ahoshta Tarkaan.

He had spoken long and pompously about the Greatness of the Tisroc in agreeing to welcome these barbarian visitors on behalf of his son and to treat them with such favour in the presence of such greatness. With much flowery and haughty language, he continued on in this vein for some time until a young, tall man whom Peridan recognised as the Prince Rabadash finally interrupted him. Making no attempt to hide his arrogance, the swarthy prince advanced upon Peridan with the stance of one greatly favouring the hearer with his valuable attention.

"My Father, the great Tisroc, may he live forever," he said, "welcomes you to his illustrious land of Calormen and bids me bring you to the palace of his greatness. We are here to celebrate your arrival, and make preparation for the even greater arrival of my betrothed and her brother. If you will join me now, barbarian lord, we shall journey through the city."

With all the grace he could muster, Peridan bowed to the Prince, though he felt nothing but disgust and distrust for the arrogance of this man in his heart. He forced himself to keep a civil tongue in his head.

"I thank you, my lord Prince Rabadash, for the hospitality of your father the Tisroc, and his deigning to welcome us to his city of Tashbaan. It would be my honour to join you this day, and thank you on behalf of my land of Narnia, their majesties the queens and king, and his most royal highness the High King, Peter the Magnificent. I am Lord Peridan, and bring but a small guard with me. They are merely here to aid me in the preparations for the arrival of her majesty Queen Susan, nothing more."

Rabadash nodded, his look suggestive as he returned Peridan's bow. "I look forward to my meeting with her grace Queen Susan dearly. Lord Peridan, I am anxious to see her again and look forward to our marriage. It will be a great day."

"Your marriage, my lord Prince?" Peridan could not refrain from answering. "I do not believe that her majesty Queen Susan has yet given her consent."

"Not in word, my lord Peridan, but if her look and gesture are any indication, I find myself expectant of an acceptance from my fair queen upon her arrival. If you are prepared, I may show you the palace of my father, the great Tisroc."

With a forced smile and grudging nod, Peridan approached the stallion offered and mounted. He followed Rabadash along the paved street and towards the gates of the city, knowing at that moment that he had never wished to be in a different place so greatly in his entire life.

* * *

Foolish though she knew it was, Karna could not stop herself from grinning as broadly as Tarlana as they made their way through the back streets of Tashbaan. They had been informed that all of the dancers at that night's festivities were to have new, beautiful outfits in cloth of the brightest shades of purple, red, and gold. The new clothes would bring glory to their master Tirshan as a statement of his wealth.

"I cannot believe that we will see the barbarian lords tonight!" Tarlana exclaimed. "I hope that our dance will be of a good enough level to bring renown to our master and glory to Tisroc (may he live forever)."

"I am sure that it will, my sister," Karna replied. "We have been practising for several hours a day for an entire week now. I am certain that we will perform the dance to perfection."

Smiling to herself, Tarlana did an excited little skip-step, very unlike her usual sedate pace.

The sight of it made Karna laugh. "Tarlana!" she exclaimed. "You are more restless than a child. I assure you, we shall see the barbarian lords soon enough."

Tarlana stilled herself, smiling apologetically as they entered the finer side of the city, soon arriving at the house of Master Tirshan. Their eyes danced as they both hurried into the changing room. When they entered, they found a crowd of excited girls, all giggling and talking at the top of their voices as they waited. But still dressed in their normal clothes.

"When are we to receive the outfits, Tamara?" Karna inquired.

"Once we have all arrived, Kediza is to lead us to where the clothes are being stored. They are apparently rather … sensual."

Her eyes widening, Karna attempted to imagine what style the clothes would be cut in, considering the usually modest style of dress that was worn by all virtuous women in their society.

However, their curiosity was soon answered by the arrival of Kediza. Her entrance caused a widespread intake of breath. Her long hair fell loosely around her face; a few braids adorned her dark tresses, golden thread interwoven with the hair. Her forehead bore a single, pale jewel. Her eyes were cleverly lightened with some powder, accentuating the already exotic allure of her appearance.

The outfit was in two pieces, and cut so suggestively that it completely shocked the servant girls. The top of the outfit was an intricately embroidered bodice, daringly cut so that the bare skin was left visible between the bottom of the bodice and the top of the skirt, revealing the belly button. A long, heavily-decorated skirt flowed from her hips to the floor, swirling with every movement of her feet.

For a moment, Kediza merely observed the amazed, slightly fearful expressions of the girls. A sardonic smile played across her lips.

"I know that this outfit may cause surprise, but it is the wish of our Master Tirshan that the barbarian lords be impressed. He believes that these outfits will have the desired affect upon his guests. There are outfits of purple, red and gold within each of these sacks. Take great care as you handle them and aid each other in dressing, for the lacing of the bodice is somewhat complex."

The girls immediately divided into pairs, aiding each other into the costumes. As Karna stood patiently waiting for Tamara to finish lacing up the top of her bodice, she found herself crossing her arms across the bare expanse of flesh, feeling uncomfortably exposed. Made impatient by her discomfort, she fingered the heavy cloth of her skirt, marvelling at the number of beads and the amount of gold thread that had gone into the decoration of this skirt alone. She was astounded by the obvious wealth of her master.

After a minute, she turned to aid Tamara. She worked at the lacings with nimble fingers, regretting for the first time that she and her sister had to participate in the dance. Their society was one that emphasised the virtue and modesty of a woman, and yet their master thought it suitable for his servant girls to dress in such a manner for the sake of the Narnian lords? Confused and uncomfortable, she stood with Tamara, waiting for the other girls to finish.

Kediza addressed them once more. "Our great Master Tirshan has purchased a number to jewels similar to my own," the head servant girl said, motioning to the one upon her forehead. "They are only required for those chosen to wear gold among us. The rest of you will braid coloured thread into your hair, dependent upon the colour of your clothes. Be sure to copy my own style as best you can. The aim is to keep the majority of it falling freely about your face. Those of you who are wearing gold, please come to me now."

Uneasy, Karna approached Kediza with Larmarla, the only other girl whom she knew well that had been chosen to wear gold.

Once they were out of the hearing range of the other girls, Kediza smiled at the girls who stood before her; there were about fifteen of them in all.

"You girls should consider yourself blessed this night, for you were chosen to wear this coveted colour out of all the other servant girls because you possess something that the other girls lack. Our master has watched the rehearsals carefully and hand-picked all of you to wear this colour, so be proud and try to bring prestige to him through your dance. May Tash (may he be praised) be honoured this night through our actions."

"But why were we chosen out of the others to wear this wondrous cloth?" a girl asked.

Kediza returned her smile. "It is because you were considered fairest by our great Master Tirshan. He wishes his guests to be greatly pleased by this night's festivities, and I hope that they will. Now, the jewels are simple to attach and require only a dab of this mixture to be secured to the skin. You will form a line and I will attach them to you by my own hand."

Obediently, the girls formed a line as Kediza went about her task. Karna and Lamarla were at the end of the line.

"Why were we chosen?" Karna asked in surprise, "I have never been considered fair—my own stepfather cannot bear the very sight of me."

"I do not know why I was chosen either," Lamarla stated. "Though, it is rather flattering."

"Flattering? But Lamarla, we have been picked to be at the front and dance closest to where the barbarian lords may glance at what we are wearing. Do these outfits not make you feel uncomfortable?"

"At first, I suppose," her friend admitted, "but the cloth is so fine and beautifully embroidered. I am starting to feel rather grand. I have never been dressed in such a way."

"But my friend, we are dressed in such a way for the men to see more of our skin than is normally allowed. I see nothing grand about it."

"Oh Karna, why must you always worry so much? Have I not always been the small, overshadowed daughter of my family? Despite being the eldest, in all my life it has been my sister Taranis that was considered the beauty, and yet this time I have been chosen and am considered fair. I care not that the clothing I wear may be provocative. For my entire life I have been told to be modest, yet now we are told to wear beautiful clothes and dance for foreign lords. Can you not merely enjoy the experience? Who knows, a lord may fall in love with me and take me away from this city, to a place where I will not be overshadowed, but be loved."

Karna stared at her friend in dismay, wishing that she could tell her the real reason for their wearing such finery. She held her tongue, not wanting to ruin the illusion f Lamarla's dream. In their dull, monotonous existence, she of all people could understand the need to believe that there was something else within life better than what they had.

After a while, all of the girls were ready. Their hair had been braided, the jewels attached to foreheads, and the initial embarrassment of having to wear such outfits had given way to nervous excitement.

As she stood in line, waiting for the moment when they would have to enter the great hall, Karna felt mildly sick. It wasn't from fear of forgetting the steps, but at the prospect of having to make such a spectacle of herself before the lustful glances of old, leering men.

It could not be put off forever though, and the moment came for them to leave the comfort of the changing chamber. They hurried through the darkened corridors of the house and paused before the large cedar doors of the great dining chamber.

In that moment when she stood waiting in the darkened corridor, Karna found herself thinking of the lion she had met in moonlit courtyard. She smelled the sweetness of his breath upon her face and remembered the feel of his rough tongue gently wiping away her tears. Then, in that moment, she heard those words echoing in her mind once more, _"Peace, dear one."_

Suddenly, she felt courage enter her heart, and she knew that she could bear this humiliation. With a bright smile forced on to her face, she drew in a breath and ran into the great dinning hall.

* * *

Author's note:

Enter Peridan!

I hope you've enjoyed this exploration of the Narnian vs the Calormene perception of each other and the introduction to Peridan.

I want to especially thank Zoey Rain for being the first to review this story. Your review made my day and was so encouraging! It was so helpful to know what someone thought about my perception of the Calormenes.

Thanks so much to everyone who have read and followed this story.

Enjoy this chapter and please let me know what you think.

Breeze.


	5. Daring to Dream

Daring to Dream

Chapter Four

Daring to Dream

In a blur of colour, Lord Peridan of Narnia beheld them. Over forty girls, all of them dressed in the same provocative style of clothing, the like of which he had never previously beheld. At the forefront of the dancers, a group of them danced, clad in gold, dazzling and sensual in their movement. He found himself transfixed by their action; so graceful and fluid were they in their movements. But at the same time, he found the blatant sensuality of it off-putting. The outfits were too provocative, and the expressions of some of the dancers so practised that they seemed sculpted to the girls' features.

However, despite his reservations, he could not deny the intrigue that the dance caused. There was something curious and rather beautiful about the style of dancing, so different to that of his homeland, he found it oddly stimulating.

The dance continued for some time, and through it, Peridan found himself considering each of the dancers separately, fascinated by their stance, their expression, the easy grace with which some moved compared to others. In the centred group at the front, they had undoubtedly collected together the prettiest of the servant girls. They all danced with an easy grace, their features fair, their figures slender.

Even amongst these girls he could sense a difference. The centremost dancer of the entire set was indeed a beauty. Tall, slender and attractive, she moved with a fluidic grace, her movements refined and yet provocative at the same time. She smiled charmingly at first one and then another of the important men there, but behind that lovely smile he could sense a cool, calculating mind. Another girl who danced to the right side of the central group was altogether different.

Although she had a bright smile upon her face, her eyes did not shine with the same brightness, causing it to seem almost brittle. There seemed to him something very sad and gentle about those eyes. Though her face was indeed lovely, it seemed almost ruined by the falseness of her smile. In his mind's eye, he saw that face lighting up in pure joy, those dark eyes dancing with laughter. Without knowing why, he found that something about her intrigued him greatly, though he knew not what it was.

Quite abruptly, Peridan realised the dance was over, and found himself applauding politely, whereas others among the crowd were cheering loudly, calling for encores. In the end, the girls filed out, the majority of them glancing across at the Narnian men, whether coyly or simply curiously. Peridan became uncomfortably aware of the amount of interest himself and his men were causing. With reluctance, he turned to the feaster next to him. He was an extremely obese man who had been introduced to them as Master Tirshan, the owner of the home within which the Narnian delegation would be staying.

"Did you enjoy the entertainment, my lord?" The man asked, his double chin shaking.

"Indeed, Master Tirshan, it was most enlightening," he replied politely, "I had never witnessed the Calormene style of dancing before."

"Oh yes," the large man replied, mopping him sweaty brow with a silken scarf, "it is a truly delightful spectacle. I thought that it might create an enjoyable diversion for you after so long a journey. For, as the poet says, 'After long journey's end no greater joy can be found than that of the eyes' delight'."

Peridan blinked, not completely comprehending his host's full meaning. "Of course, Master Tirshan," he agreed.

"Are there any of the young women that you would wish to become more closely acquainted with, my Lord Peridan? The central dancer is an exquisite young woman in my employ named Kediza, she is a lively companion, and my head servant girl."

"Were they then your servant girls who danced, Master Tirshan?"

"Indeed they were, and specially chosen for their talents. The girls in gold were particularly chosen for their greater … gifts over the others."

"I am sure that they were."

"Do you not wish to partake of my offer, my lord?"

"I thank you for your kind offer, my friend, but I must decline. I am sure that they must need to return home to their families at so late an hour."

"Why no, my lord, they are in my employ and therefore must do what I require of them. The girls in gold will be joining us regardless of your preference. I wish to have a pleasurable distraction while our meal is eaten."

Horrified for a moment, Peridan carefully hid his surprise, "Are they to be forced to stay, Master Tirshan?"

The fat man laughed jovially, "Indeed they will, my lord, or either leave at the displeasure of their master and lose their employ."

He bellowed with laughter at this as though it were some great joke, only causing Peridan to feel all the more disgusted. At fear of offending, he forced himself to hold his tongue. Who was he to challenge the society of another land?

All it did was to harden his resolve of dissuading Susan from so disastrous a marriage in so terrible a land.

"Very well, if they are to be forced to remain, I would ask for the company of one young woman, the maiden who danced to the right of the front set."

Tirshan grinned broadly, as though he had unveiled some great secret, "Then my lord does have a preference from among the girls? Very well, I shall have all of the girls dressed in gold brought in; you shall have your pick of them, my Lord Peridan." Grimacing, Peridan pretended to be reaching for more wine in an excuse to look away and hide his disgust.

"Bring in the girls," Tirshan ordered, the leer broadening over his large face.

* * *

When they had reached the sanctuary of the changing chamber once more, Karna sunk upon a bench in relief, thankful that the entire ordeal was finally over. With a smile, she turned to Tarlana, and had been about to ask her to unlace her bodice, when Kediza had entered the chamber.

"Our great Master Tirshan has arranged a superior honour for those of you who wear golden clothes this night, for you are to join him and his renowned guests at the feast."

A large gasp spread about the room as the girls turned to one another, some envious, others grateful, others anxious. Karna was terrified, glancing at Tamara. Her friend instantly reached out to take her hand, muttering,

"May Tash bless and protect you this night," before they were all called by Kediza to join her. Suddenly desperate to escape, Karna glanced about her, looking for some means of exit, but finding none, forced herself to walk towards Kediza. She pictured her mother's gentle face within her mind, willing herself to accept her lot in life, to make the best of it.

The variety of reactions about the group of girls was astounding. There were those among their number who smiled as smugly as Kediza, preening themselves in readiness. Then there were those like Karna who simply looked terrified, glancing about with wide eyes. One girl in particular, a pretty, petite creature named Kezara suddenly looked terribly young and vulnerable to Karna at that moment, so much so that she put her arm around the young girl.

"Please," she said, trying to sound normal, "Kezara is but a child. Could not some other girl be chosen to fill her place?"

Kediza swung round upon Karna so suddenly that the other girl jumped. "How dare you question the order of our Master Tirshan and the will of Tash, the inexorable, the irresistible? It is an honour to be chosen and yet you scoff at it."

Before she could react, Kediza slapped Karna full across the mouth, causing an audible intake of breath from among the girls. "Does anyone else wish to question the command of our Master?" Kediza demanded, glaring around at the others. Silence reigned, and, nodding her head, Kediza led the way out of the changing chamber, making certain that Karna followed.

They entered the dinning hall to great cheers from the assembled throng, being made to stand in a line whilst Master Tirshan made a long, pompous speech. In the end, he invited the barbarian lord to choose the girl whose company he desired, and for the first time, Karna dared to look upon the face of the stranger.

Glancing up, she was astonished to find him regarding her with eyes that appeared violet in the candlelight. His skin was indeed pale, though not as that of cream; it was undoubtedly lighter than the tanned complexions of the Calormene lords.

Wordlessly, she saw him search her face, and, as though she knew he was seeking her permission, she nodded her head, almost imperceptibly, but enough for him to note and reply.

"I would seek the company of that young lady, Master Tirshan," pointing directly at her. Suddenly feeling afraid, Karna willed her legs to move and approached him, bowing her head respectfully. In a similar gesture, he bowed his head and took her hand, kissing it gently as he did so. Astonished and knowing not what to do, Karna kept her head bowed, feeling the colour that flushed across her cheeks.

This courtly gesture of the foreign lord had caused widespread merriment amongst Master Tirshan's guests, and after he had chosen the glamorous Kediza, the other lords soon stood up, wishing to make their choice of the pretty girls before them. In horror, Karna watched as Lamarla was all but shoved into a seat by one Tarkhaan, a thin man she did not recognise, with a jutting chin and horribly suggestive eyes. In turn she saw Kezara chosen one of the barbarian soldiers, and found herself sighing a prayer of thanks to Tash as the warrior gently offered her wine.

She was so engrossed in watching the others that she did not remember her companion until he cleared his throat. Suddenly aware of her great rudeness, she turned to the barbarian lord, picking up the nearest tray and offering it to him.

"May I offer you some partridge, my lord?" she asked, "it is considered a delicacy." Not daring to meet his eyes, she stared into her lap, not moving until she felt the removal of the tray from her arms. She turned to him in surprise; only to be astonished at the tenderness that she found within those blue eyes.

"I would ask your name, my lady," he said, simply. Startled by so direct a gaze, Karna lowered her eyes.

"I am no lady, my lord. I am but a simple servant girl, not worth the attention of one such as yourself."

Now himself surprised, Peridan regarded her with amazement. "Do you mean to say that in Calormen, the name of a servant is of no importance to his master?"

Karna stared at him in bewilderment. "Of course, my lord. Is it not so in your own land?"

"In my own land of Narnia, miss, we consider each individual to be of value, including Calormene servant girls. Now, with that in mind, would you permit me to know your name?"

"I am Karna, my lord."

"Karna." Peridan said it as though considering it; he repeated it a few times. "Does it mean anything?"

"I do no know, my lord."

Peridan smiled then, "If I may be so bold, my name is Peridan. I would prefer it if you called me by it."

"If that is your wish, my lord."

"It is."

"Very well, my lord Peridan."

Smiling openly now, Peridan took up the nearest dish and offered it to Karna. "Would you care for some bread, lady Karna?"

Uncertain, Karna reached for the dish, amazed that so great a lord saw fit to serve her personally. "Is it always so in your land, my lord?"

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"Do lords always treat servants in the same way that they would treat those of noble birth?"

Peridan turned to Karna gravely. "In Narnia, we believe that every creature, be they human or animal, has a right to respect and courtesy."

"Animal, my lord?"

"Yes, animal, Karna. We have talking beasts within my land and one of my dearest friends is a faun."

Karna gasped, "A faun, my lord Peridan?"

Peridan laughed, "Yes, a faun, lass. Half man, half goat, he if one of the wisest creatures I have ever met, and a better creature you will never find in all the world."

"But do you not find it queer speaking with talking animals when you hunt them as well?"

"Ah, no, I would sooner cut off my own ear than hunt an animal that spoke. They are not all of that kind in my land, we have a great number of dumb beasts as well, and they are the kind that we hunt for food."

Karna shook her head in amazement, "I cannot imagine being able to have speech with an animal! Are the horses that you ride of this speaking kindred?" Peridan laughed,

"Nay, Karna. The beasts that we ride are intelligent and courageous creatures, but they still require a guiding hand. It is not our right to take advantage of Aslan's talking beasts. Only with their permission would we ride upon their backs, and though some are glad enough to offer their services, we would never ride them without their express permission."

Karna regarded the Narnian lord in amazement, unable to comprehend the existence of animals that spoke and creatures that were half goat and half human. Yet, with her disbelief, her fear fled, and she found herself growing comfortable in the man's presence. Even brave enough to ask questions of her own.

"What is your land of Narnia like, my lord Perdian? For we hear only rumour of green hills and deep forests, all of which is gossip. Tell me, in truth, what is it like?"

For a moment, Peridan merely gazed into the distance, considering the question, but also lost in memory.

"It is home," he said at last. "There is no-one born in Narnia that does not feel some connection with the land, and though I myself was born in the distant Archenland, Narnia has always been my home. There are tall mountains, sweeping and great, forests deep and green where the fauns and dryads dance in the night. There is a clearing named Dancing Glade where we have come together late in the night, dancing and singing around the fire, telling stories of the north, tales of Aslan, of times long ago.

"Then, overlooking the great sea that is to the west is the castle of Cair Paravel, the home of the four monarchs of our land. Incomparable is the wisdom of High King Peter the Magnificent. Brave and just, he has ruled and guarded our land of Narnia for years uncounted, fair and true to all, there is none to whom he may be compared, in battle or swordplay. King Edmund the Just is to come with Queen Susan upon her journey hence to meet your Prince, and the like of his justice will not be found in any other land, for honourable he is and skilled in swordplay, a great warrior of men.

"Queen Susan the Gentle is the most caring and compassionate, so sweet and trusting is she, she is beloved of all our people, and Queen Lucy … I know none like her. She is valiant and brave, yet quick to laugh and the merriest lady that you will ever meet. She has ever been able to befriend those who are shy or uncomfortable, for there is an honest, deeply loving nature within her, the like of which I had never beheld in another, she is a marvel to me."

He was silent for a time, staring into the distance, a faint smile playing across his lips. Karna watched him, astounded at the deep devotion that this man had for his country. There was such a loyalty and even love of it in his eyes that the mere mention caused his eyes to shine. She imagined Calormen in her own mind, warm, dusty and busy; saw the great hills to the north, thought of the proud knights of her land that had fought to gain territory, and yet she felt no pride.

Try as she might, the only emotion that she could conjure up to express her feelings towards her nation was neutrality, perhaps even a little shame. For the glory of a Tisroc was measured by how much territory he won, how strong his army was, not in the depth of his wisdom.

"What are you thinking of?"

Drawn from her reverie, Karna jumped, quickly turning to her companion, she apologised for her distraction.

"Not at all," Peridan replied with a smile, "I often find my mind wondering and can often not recall what I was previously speaking of. What was in your thoughts to immerse you so greatly?"

Blushing slightly, she replied, "I was thinking of how wonderful your land must be to inspire so great a loyalty within your heart, my lord."

"Does not yours, Karna?"

Suddenly uncomfortable, she lowered her eyes. "Of course my lord, my land of Calormen is great and illustrious, we have a wise and indomitable Tisroc (may he live forever) and a brave prince whose courage on the battlefield is incomparable and renowned." She was silent for a time, not meeting Peridan's eyes. Karna felt ashamed, certain that she had, in some way, brought dishonour upon her land.

Peridan observed the girl thoughtfully, considering her words and her great reluctance to now meet his eyes. At that moment, there was something terribly naïve and innocent about Karna, a fact that was only accentuated by how odd the provocative quality of her outfit appeared next to it.

She seemed utterly lost in that moment, afraid of offending, and yet unable to suppress some hidden yearning. Without knowing why, Peridan reached out and tilted her chin up to look into her dark eyes. He was touched to the heart by the unshed tears he saw glistening there.

"Never feel ashamed of dreaming, Karna. I myself dream of things. As a lad I was filled with ambition. It is what it is to be young. You have no reason to feel guilty of having hope, it is one of the greatest gifts that you can have."

"But, my lord, what right have I to question the destiny that Tash has deigned that I should have within my life? For he does know all."

"In Narnia, we do not worship Tash, Karna, but the son of the great lord over the sea, the mighty Aslan. We believe that it was he who first created this earth and all the peoples within it, and we would also accept that Aslan has decided upon the life that we are to live. But we believe that every turmoil in this life has a purpose, that through difficult situations, Aslan teaches us, because he loves us."

Karna regarded the man, desperate to ask a certain question, but still terribly afraid of offending.

"Do not fear me, Karna." He smiled at her, his blue eyes warm and encouraging in the firelight.

Drawing courage from that smile, she spoke. "What form does Aslan take?"

"He takes no form, Karna, he is a lion. He is not a spirit. He has and always will be a lion, so has it always been."

Karna closed her eyes, willing the tears that threatened, to subside. Throughout their conversation, she had been longing to ask that question, and now that she had heard the truth, she felt no doubt within her heart that it truly had been an apparition of this Aslan that she had met that night.

"Have you ever seen a lion, my lord?"

Peridan smiled, "I have done more than that Karna, for I have beheld Aslan, face-to-face."

Karna gasped, afraid to hear more, but unable to refrain from asking, "But how can you have seen a deity my lord?"

"He is not a deity who is distant and does not care for those he has created, Karna. It was he that led our great kings and queens into Narnia from a distant land that was utterly out of this world."

"A land out of this world, my lord?" With every moment Karna became more confused, so much so that she began to doubt what she heard. Earnestly, she tried to make sense of it, and failed all the more with every attempt to understand. "How can that be possible?"

Peridan refrained from answering, seeing the girl's confusion, he decided to change the topic of conversation, enquiring instead after her family.

"Who is your father, Karna? What is his living?"

"My mother's husband is a carver my lord, he is very adept at carving images of Tash (may he be praised) from wood and stone, they are excellently finished and enable us to exist with relative ease."

"How many are there within your family?"

"I have two brothers, who aid my father in the market each day. One of my sisters and I work under the employ of Master Tirshan, and my youngest sister was lately married. She is now a wife and not required to secure an income for her home. Other than that, there is my mother whom I love above all others."

She paused, wondering why on earth she had said those last words. Peridan did not seemed surprised by it, actually inquiring as to whether she was close to her mother?

Karna smiled, "Yes, my lord, we are very close. It is my mother who understands me the best, she alone that knows the whole truth within my heart."

Peridan smiled, "It was the same between my father and I. My mother died when I was but a lad, and since there were no other children, my father grew to love me fiercely, teaching me the art of sword craft from a young age. He shared all with me. In a similar manner I returned this devotion.

My father was the man that I idolised and loved with all my soul. Late into the night he would enchant me tales of valour, recite legends of past wars and battles, acts of bravery and courage that held me enraptured. I was but sixteen when he died in a hunt and it was as though a piece of my heart was taken with him.

"For nigh on a year, I lived a half-life, caring little for anything. Though my good uncle and his sweet wife were kind to me; seeking to treat me as one of their sons, I was never at ease within their home. Then, upon the eve of my seventeenth birthday, word reached Archenland that a great battle was to happen within Narnia. It was a land that for years had been under the grip of an enchanted winter, for a powerful sorceress was said to rule the land. When I heard of the bold king Peter and his brothers and sisters, I rode away with a few friends to offer my service to this great king.

"Alas, we reached the land after their great victory and entered the service to High King Peter. At that time he was little more than a lad, but with the bearing of a king. In essence, the kind of monarch that I had longed within my dreams to serve, and thus did Narnia became my home."

Throughout Peridan's narration, Karna had listened, enchanted and fascinated by the tale. "I am sorry for your loss, my lord."

"Thank you, but it was many years ago, Karna, and I found what I had lost within my father, in service of King Peter. Narnia truly became the home to me that Archenland had never really felt to be; the kings and queens became my brothers and sisters. I could not think myself luckier."

Karna smiled, casting her eyes down into her lap. She took a slice of honeyed melon from her plate and ate it slowly, savouring the taste despite herself.

Peridan regarded her in silence, marvelling at the difference between women of Calormen. The highborn ladies that he had met that afternoon had all flirted shamelessly with him, smelling of spices and exotic flowers, their faces attractively painted, their heads adorned with flowers and ornate headdresses. The Tarkheenas' very manner of conversation had seemed practised and graceful, coquettish and yet demure.

In contrast, Karna's eagerness was unfeigned and innocent, her manner truthfully shy, her appearance almost ruined by the obvious allurement of the revealing outfit. There was a sweetness and purity to her that he found incredibly refreshing, so different to the practised charm of the other women, more like that of the honest, caring women of Narnia.

He was about to speak when he saw Master Tirshan rise.

"It is time," he declared, "that these lovely girls depart, for we do not wish to worry their parents." This caused an outburst of barked laughter from all of the Calormen men assembled there. Peridan found the mirth of it lost to him, but forced a polite smile. In a single graceful movement, the head servant girl rose, smiling seductively at her master for a moment before gesturing that the other girls follow her.

More than willing to oblige, several of the girls almost sprang away from the benches, smiling at their companions with as much dignity as they could muster. Karna alone seemed sad to depart her companion's company, but bowed her head to him respectfully, thanking him for his conversation.

"I thank you for your company, lady Karna," Peridan replied as solemnly, and, taking her hand within his own, kissed it gently, before bowing to her.

She made to leave, before pausing by him for a moment, "Thank you for telling me on your land, my lord," she whispered, "and giving me the courage to dream once more."

Peridan bowed to her again, watching her quick retreat, both surprised and greatly sorrowed.

* * *

Author's note:

A bit of character exploration here as we get to know our two main protagonists better. But I must warn you – this will eventually be a romance but we won't get there for a _long_ time. I'm afraid a lot has to happen before these two even think about it!

I have to give a very heartfelt shout out of Calyn and I . Appletje for their incredible reviews. Calyn especially – your review was so encouraging and was just what I needed to hear because I wasn't sure if people were getting what I was trying to do with this story.

Also, I have been fairly regular with updates because I have been on holiday, I'm sorry but it might slow down to once every two weeks after I go back to work on 1st September.

Anyway, thanks so much for everyone reading – for all the follows and people who are watching the story.

Please review and let me know what you think.

Thanks again,

Breeze.


	6. The Bite of Reality

Daring to Dream

Chapter Five

The Bite of Reality

In a mass of giggling and rustling cloth, the servant girls hurried into the changing chamber, most of them very relived to have escaped from the meal without any further repercussions. Karna was definitely among them, and yet, she felt almost elated at the same time.

She now felt certain within herself that she could endure. Peridan's words were still vivid in her mind. Words of encouragement, words that told her it was the greatest gift of all to dream, to hope for a better future. She stood for a moment and revelled in the comfort of his words.

An abrupt hand upon her arm brought her very abruptly back to reality. Spinning round, she came face to face with several excited girls, all of them chattering at once.

"Oh Karna, what was he like?"

"What an honour to have been chosen out of us all! Weren't you very pleased?"

"I was so jealous, you are so lucky!"

"What was his name?" Karna smiled, this last one being from Lamarla,

"Lord Peridan," she replied, "he was kindness itself, so respectful of me. He actually served me himself. I would have never expected such an action from so high a lord. He is a close friend of the barbarian queen and her brothers and sister."

"You are so lucky!" one girl squealed before giggling shrilly, her eyes dancing rather alarmingly.

"Tarleen, did you drink much of the wine?" one of others asked.

The smaller girl giggled again,"Just a small amount, Master Lirishta encouraged me to. He chose me personally, what greater honour could there have been?"

Karna raised her eyebrows, exchanging an anxious glance with Lamarla before taking control of the situation. Gently, but firmly, she steered the intoxicated girl towards a bench.

"I am sure that it was, Tarleen. Now, come along, for you must change, your mother and father shall be expecting you home sooner rather than later."

"But my sister went ahead of me," Tarleen exclaimed, laughing once more, so shrilly that it was ear-gratingly high. Several girls flinched at the noise, and a few sought to aid Karna in the girl's dressing. In a short time, they had managed to change her back into her normal dress.

The majority of the girls had removed all remnants of their costume by the time Kediza came in, but every servant girl paused at her entrance, watching her almost fearfully. In response, she merely stared at them for a moment, as though assessing every girl present, judging whether she were worthy of her attention.

Eventually, however, she did speak,

"I bring word from Master Tirshan," she announced, "we are all to receive an extra gold coin for our part in the festivities this night. The barbarian lord was most pleased with the entertainment; he also spoke with great regard towards you, Karna. For this, and your service, you have the thanks of your master, and myself."

Karna blinked in surprise, amazed that Kediza was actually thanking her. "We are given leave to depart from our master's house, may we pray that Tash the inexorable, the irresistible is honoured through the barbarian queen's visit."

In response, all of the girls bowed their heads, silent as Kediza spoke a brief prayer to their god. Even Tarleen managed to hold her peace.

* * *

The girls filed silently out of the house, conversing in whispers as they stole into the darkness of the city. Anxious for the safety of Tarleen, Karna and Lamarla had volunteered to take her home. They supported her slender frame between them, as they made their slow progress through the darkened streets.

"I wish that we could have left with the others," Lamarla admitted anxiously, glancing around at the shadowed corners as they passed gloomy alleyways. "I don't feel safe at all."

"We'll be alright," Karna replied with a confidence that she did not feel, "there's no-one about. It must be past midnight by now and everyone will be abed."

Tarleen giggled at that, "All in bed!" she exclaimed, a little too loudly, "everyone is asleep and we're the only ones awake!"

"Hush Tarleen," Lamarla said quickly, "they won't be for long if you are not quiet."

Tarleen giggled inanely, "Why do I want to be quiet when I'm up so late? Mother would never have let me, but because I was ordered by Master Tirshan, it's my duty to stay up late. Also, to be chosen because I am beautiful ... can there be any greater honour?"

"No, Tarleen, there can't," Karna agreed, willing to say anything, if only to quieten the girl, "but now that the evening is over you must go home and sleep. If you don't then you won't be rested for tomorrow morning and would you truly be fulfilling your duty to Master Tirshan if you turned up tired?"

This hushed Tarleen, and as she considered, the truth of it slowly dawned upon her drunken mind.

"I can't not do my duty," she stated solemnly after a while, "let's go home, I have to be prepared for tomorrow."

Sighing thankfully, Karna and Lamarla helped her along the street, reaching her door more swiftly than they had at first hoped. She slipped inside without a backward look, a solemn expression on her face, as though determined to fulfil her duty to the best of her ability.

For a moment, the two of them simply stood, silently thanking Tash for the silence that covered the street. In the sky, thousands of stars shone, beautiful and radiant, spreading from one horizon to the other. Transfixed by them, Karna merely stared, amazed. They had ever dwelt above the land, never changing, constant and beautiful. They had seen the rise and fall of worlds, and yet had ever been the same.

"Karna?" Turning, she saw Lamarla staring at her strangely, her face eerily shadowed by the flickering torch. "We should go; we must be rested for tomorrow."

"Of course," Karna replied, "We should probably go via your home first, it is closer."

"What were you staring at the sky for?"

"I was just looking at the stars, thinking how old they must be, I can't imagine being that old."

Lamarla regarded her friend strangely, "You're not meant to, Karna, for no-one is that old, only Tash (may he be praised) is immortal. Why you think of such things, I don't know. The most my sister ever considers is whether a handsome young man will be attracted to her enough to make her his wife."

Karna laughed softly, taking her friend's arm. "I don't know why I do either, Lamarla, but I am just glad that I have your practicality to bring me back to reality."

* * *

When she reached her home, Karna opened the door as quietly as she could, cringing as the rusted bolts groaned loudly. She saw the lamp left burning and was thanking Tash for the sense of Tarlana, before she noticed the figure sitting by the table. Covered by her old woollen shawl, Hezal sat, regarding her daughter with kind eyes.

"Mother, why did you stay awake for my return?" Karna asked, taking the only other chair.

With a gentle smile, her mother pushed a cup towards her, "I wanted to make sure that you drank this before you slept, it is a remedy that will cure any ailment created by the wine."

Laughing softly, Karna kissed her mother's cheek, "How kind you are, oh my mother, to stay awake into the night just to ensure that I might not have a headache the next day. Where is there one so considerate in the entire world?

It is so kind of you, but not necessary. I drunk no wine this night. The barbarian lord chose me for his companion throughout the meal and was more kind and considerate than I have ever known a man to be. Even though I am a mere servant girl, he served me food with his own hands, he poured water into my glass, and he even told me to call him by his first name. I have never met a man like him."

"What an honour to be chosen, my daughter," her mother replied, "And to be chosen from all of the girls dressed in gold? Tash be praised!"

"Yes," Karna admitted, "Tash indeed be praised. I felt very honoured."

"And what was the lord's name?"

"Lord Peridan. I cannot express his kindness. I had never even imagined it possible for there to be a place where everyone could be treated with the same respect but they are within Narnia. He told me that everyone, whether lord or servant, man or woman or even talking beast, are valued and treated in the same manner."

Her mother stared at her in surprise, "What? The lowest slave is treated in the same way as their king?"

Karna smiled, "Perhaps not exactly the same, but each is shown respect."

Unexpectedly, her mother did not return the smile; rather, she almost appeared anxious. "My daughter, such a society does not make sense. The very notion of it is ridiculous, for how would such a world run without utter chaos ensuing? If slaves are not treated with contempt then they do not fear their masters, if servants are not forced to obey the will of their employer, then they take advantage of that weakness.

"Everyone has a place within this society; it is not for us to question what Tash has deigned will be our lot in life. You have indulged in these ridiculous fantasies long enough, Karna; it is time that you accepted your place in this world. You are not a queen; neither can you expect to be treated as one. Ever have you dreamed, even longed for things to not be as they are, but they have not changed and nor are they like to. Accept what you have and be grateful for it, oh my daughter."

Suddenly grim, she took her daughter's hands, catching her gaze almost desperately. Karna was shocked at tears she saw glistening there.

"Do not live in the hope of impossible dreams, Karna. If you do, it will destroy you, you will waste away longing for something that will never come to pass. I tell you this because I was once such a one myself. In my youth, I dreamed and hoped for love in my marriage, and I was lucky enough to be chosen by a man so kind and loving that I could indulge those dreams, but I was forced to grow up, and reality hit me in the most painful way possible.

"On the day that my father married me to Tarneesh, I let go of my youth, of my unfulfilled dreams and decided to embrace the life that Tash had created for me. That alone is real, my daughter. I would not have you go through the same pain that I went through, and that is why I urge you, nay, beg you, let go of these dreams and be happy in your existence. Do not wish for more, accept your lot in life and be content."

In that moment, Karna could suddenly see her mother's life, see the hopes and dreams of her youth, see the pain and suffering of that fateful moment when all of it had proved in vain. Her exultation at Peridan's words faded as though it had been some passing dream, and, in this woman's eyes, she saw the reality of life, saw the truth of what it was.

She forced herself to consider the doubtfulness of what she had hoped for ever coming true. With a terrible sorrow, she bid her dreams farewell, determining to never give her mother cause to worry for her again.

* * *

The weeks passed gradually, and with the cooler nights giving way to the greater heat of the Calormene spring, Peridan found himself yearning more than ever for the lush glades and cool sea breezes of the country he loved. But for all his yearning, he was unable to dwell upon it for long.

With his arrival had also arisen a multitude of preparations that needed doing in anticipation of the delegation's arrival. From morning until night, he found himself besieged with organising social gatherings, inspecting whether the furnishings of bedchambers were appropriate and even giving advice concerning menus! In particular, the Calormenes seemed to be going to great lengths to satisfy the delegation's preferences, and most particularly, that of Queen Susan.

Throughout the busyness of those chaotic days, Peridan was so concerned with the matter in hand that he seldom gave thought to anything else. It was only at night that he would walk upon the balcony, free from the curious, prying eyes and feigned smiles of the nobility, to be alone with his thoughts. In those evenings, he would stroll about, or merely stand, staring at the vast expanse of stars above him, appreciating the one thing that he truly loved about this country, the nights.

Though he loved Narnia, it was a land far greener than Calormen, and because of this, was given to having more clouds at night, sometimes blocking the beauty of the stars. In this drier country, rain clouds seldom came, and because of it, the skies were always perfectly clear at night. They created a wide sapphire shroud studded with diamond-bright stars.

Only in moments such as this was he able to find complete calm, to collect his thoughts and meditate upon the events of the day. Without knowing why, he found his mind drifting back to the servant girl, Karna.

He had thought about her often in the past few weeks, though he had not seen her since, she had intrigued him. Sweet, innocent and gentle she had seemed, yet at the same time eager, curious and even bold when she had gathered her courage. She had reminded him of himself as a lad, but she had appeared to be older, and if he was to have guessed, he would have thought her to be about eighteen or seventeen year of age.

However, it was her very eagerness had reminded him of one much younger. She had seemed free and unconstrained, filled with the joy of youth, still unblemished by the hardships of reality.

He smiled softly to himself as he imagined Lucy's same exuberance and the she took joy in life, even after her many years of being queen. Despite the length of their friendship, he often forgot how young she still was. Having been just eight when she discovered the way into their world, she was now only eighteen, the same age he supposed Karna to be. But, for her few years, she was a learned warrior and a talented archer, not to mention a skilled rider.

Peridan found himself longing for the company of his dear friends, to be dining with them in the great hall of Cair Paravel, listening to some bard's song, or to Tumnus relating some ancient tale of Narnia.

He missed them.

* * *

"Karna, come here."

Flinching at the sudden command, Karna turned to her father, hurriedly approaching him. "Yes, oh my Father and the delight of my eyes?"

With a solemn, slightly mocking expression, Tarneesh beheld his stepdaughter,

"How would you like to be married as your sister is?"

Her eyes widening, Karna regarded her stepfather in astonishment, only remembering at the last moment to hold her tongue. "I have been asked to give my consent by Master Lavarin."

Karna blanched.

Master Lavarin was the local blacksmith. He was a hefty, ruddy man with a strangely proportioned face, having small, dark eyes and lips that had always struck her as overly large. However, the main cause for her discrete shudder was her remembrance of the looks that he had always given her and Tarlana when they passed his workshop entrance.

Tarneesh regarded her expectantly, waiting for her response, his eyes burning her skin with the intensity of his stare. Karna felt the eyes of all her family upon her at that moment. She glanced over at her mother and saw the pleading look in her eyes, begging her to accept and not anger her step-father.

Tears came unbidden to her eyes as she desperately sought for some excuse to not consent. However, when none arose, she fought the tears back, bowed her head, and knelt before her father, "Your words greatly please me, my father."

Grunting in assent, Tarneesh forcibly raised her chin, seeing the unwept tears. But, instead of being angry, he merely smirked, pushing her face away with a grin of triumph, he snorted, heading towards the bedding chamber with a decided spring to his usual slouching step. Only turning back for a moment in the doorway, he announced that he would be visiting Master Lavarin the following evening to finalise their agreement. He left the room, followed swiftly by both his sons and wife, leaving the two sisters alone.

Tarlana remained where she was, listening cautiously to the action within the next room; the murmurs of her mother and the gruff grunts of her father. She did not dare to move towards her sister until her father slept.

After a time, she chanced a glance up from her work, and was unnerved by the hunched-up form of Karna, still sat in the same position as when she had knelt in front of their father. Forgetting her fear in the face of her sister's strange behaviour, Tarlana left her seat, softly calling Karna's name. But not even that moved her.

After some hesitation, she gently touched Karna's arm. Her sister flinched away from the touch and stared at Tarlana is surprise with an expression shocked her sister to her very core.

The face that stared at her was not that of her sister. In the place of the normally bright, dancing eyes was a dull, slightly glazed pair that barely acknowledged her. Unchecked tears stained her cheeks, leaving tracks in the dust that she had not even bothered to wipe away. The features were expressionless and blank, showing neither joy nor sorrow at the prospect of her marriage. They were utterly devoid of the hidden strength that had always defined Karna in her eyes.

Horrified by Karna's expression, Tarlana felt tears coming to her own eyes. In a final attempt to seek some reassurance, she took her sister's hand, relieved to find it still warm. She gazed at her imploringly, begging her to show some recognition, to be herself. But in response, she got mere indifference.

Karna withdrew her hand, and headed over to the remains of that night's water. She splashed her face, removing all trace of the tears.

"Karna?"

She turned, regarding her sister with mild curiosity, "Yes, Tarlana?"

Still unnerved by her sister's action, Tarlana asked, "What think you of father's proposal?"

Her sister shrugged, "If it is father's will, then I shall marry Master Lavarin. For it is a daughter's duty to fulfil her father's will. I shall be content with the truth of that, my sister. Besides, by marrying Master Lavarin I shall be ensuring a secure income for my future, it is a blessing from Tash (may he be praised), and it would foolish to hope for more than that which I have in my life."

Shocked, Tarlana shook her head, "But Karna, what of the number of times that we spoke of our dislike of Master Lavarin? Do you not remember the looks that he always gives? He has always disgusted you."

Again, Karna shrugged, "We cannot be children all our lives, Tarlana. I can't indulge foolish whims any longer; I have to accept what I am and be grateful for whatever opportunities I am given in life to secure my future."

Utterly confused, Tarlana nodded slowly. She stood, watching as her sister calmly entered the sleeping chamber.

In that moment, her life had just lost one of its greatest joys.

* * *

Author's note:

I want to start by thanking ZoeyRain for another great review and you did comment that you hated Tirshan.

I do know that he is awful and treats his servants badly. But my reasoning behind Tirshan's characterization is based upon the grand Vizir in a lot of ways in that he gets what he wants through sucking up and sickeningly obsequious behaviour. My thought was that Tirshan would enjoy lauding his power over his servants and abusing his power.

So I hope that makes sense.

I know I am being appalling to poor old Karna, but we are still near the start and she will be going on a _long_ journey. I want to thank everyone who is reading this, I don't know how many at the moment sadly because my story traffic is malfunctioning, but hopefully that should be fixed soon.

As always, thank you so much for reading and please let me know what you think by reviewing.

Thanks again,

Breeze.


	7. A Re-awakening of Trust

Daring to Dream

Chapter Six

A Re-awakening of Trust

Vast, magnificent and endless, the sea spread from one horizon to the next before her. Deep and blue, it seemed to go on forever, capturing her imagination and making her dream of far off lands.

From a young age, Queen Lucy of Narnia had been able to create great, distant kingdoms with her mind. So now she tried to picture Calormen. But try though she might, she found herself unable to see beyond the scene of a large, dusty place that was barren of all things green and lovely.

The simple truth was that, try as she might, Lucy could not comprehend the idea of her sister's marrying. It just seemed so peculiar!

Though it was their tenth year of living in Narnia, she still thought of Susan as the playmate of her youth. She had also seen her brothers' react with similar uncertainty at the proposal of Susan's marrying.

The very mention of Calormen caused deep concern. She could not understand it, but the very thought of Susan marrying the prince of that land filled her with dread. In counsel before he left, she had found Peridan to feel a similar way.

She pondered this for a time, trying to make sense of it. _Why she should feel so concerned if Susan was happy with the match?_

In the midst of her consideration, she turned and smiled at the approach of her eldest brother. Tall, fair of face and kindly mannered, he had not changed in all their years in Narnia. With each year that passed, he only seemed to grow more wise and aware of the needs of others.

Peter returned her smile and gently kissed her brow by way of greeting. "Do you contemplate our sister's leaving, Lucy?"

She merely nodded. "I fear that the decision is rashly made, Peter. I don't know why, but I am concerned and can find no rest from it. I fear that no good will come of this journey."

After a moment, the high king turned to his sister, his own anxiety clear.

"You have perceived it as well," he said, "I think Ed shares our concern. He swore to me that he would protect Susan with all his power. Of course he will, but I fear that we shall need more than mere brute-strength to keep our sister safe. Let us pray that Aslan will guide them and keep all our friends safe as they undertake this dangerous journey."

Lucy nodded gravely, allowing a small smile to grace her lips despite her concern,

"At least we shall know that Aslan is watching over them. Don't worry Peter. He will not let harm come to them. We must trust him, regardless of what we feel."

Peter smiled.

"You are always the voice of reason about such things, Lu. I know you are right. Aslan's watching over them and we must leave it at that."

* * *

The change in Karna soon became evident to all. By the end of the week even the boorish, slow-witted Kanzeesh grew to notice how little his older sister now smiled and laughed.

Instead, she aided her mother wordlessly and without complaint. She no longer defied their father, or anyone in word, deed or even look. She simply went through her daily routine, rising even before their father to get the water, preparing the meals, and doing her allotted tasks more efficiently than she ever had before. But everything was done without a sparkle of wit, or a single smile flashed across the room.

Tarneesh simply treated her with the same indifference, feeling even less interest now that she was submitting. He was simply glad that he could look forward to a time when she would no longer eat his food or be a constant thorn in his side. He and Lavarin had discussed the wedding plans with all possible swiftness, finalising the amount suitable for a dowry, and both getting a great sense of pleasure from it.

To Lavarin, it was a great arrangement, for he would be getting not only a wife from the agreement, but a young, beautiful and biddable girl who would be his soul possession for life. The very thought of it brought a leer to his round face. In his mind's eye, he saw the girl, tall, slender and lovely, standing before him in her wedding gown; his and his alone.

Though he was but a blacksmith, Lavarin had a terrible vanity. He thought himself a handsome man by Calormen's standard and, because of this felt that Karna and he would greatly compliment each other when married. From the first moment that he had seen her, Lavarin had been taken with her easy-grace, the way that her eyes sparkled when she laughed, the slender litheness of her figure.

But where he had been endowed with a great self-importance of his own worth, Lavarin greatly lacked the courage to declare it to other people. He was a tall, rotund man with large, bulky features and an aggravatingly superior air. Many in the local community regarded him with dislike. However, in this circumstance people's opinions were often kept to themselves. His skill as a blacksmith was an undeniable one, and very much essential.

He saw Karna the day after the wedding contracts had been arranged and felt great satisfaction. He stood in the open doorway of his workshop, basking in both the radiance of the sun's light and his own brilliance, watching his bride and her sister approach.

They walked together, not speaking as they always had, but silent and strangely solemn. However, any further consideration of this behaviour did not occur to Lavarin. He was too distracted by comparing the slightness of his intended's frame to that of Tarlana's stocky, larger build. He was taking such satisfaction from the comparison that he almost missed them as they passed his doorway.

He only realised at the last moment that he had every right to stop Karna.

"Good day to you, Karna," he said, smiling at her sudden jerk as she halted. "In the name of Tash, (my he be praised), how far you this day?"

He regarded her intently, oblivious to the subtle shudder that ran down her spine as she turned to face him. "Good day to you, Master Lavarin," she said, her expression neutral, "I am well I thank you. In the name of Tash (may he be praised) how fare you this day?"

The blacksmith smiled broadly, taking her small hands. "I am very well, I thank you. In fact, I have never been so content within my whole life."

Silent for a moment, his betrothed seemed to swallow hard before managing a smile that might have seemed pained had he not understood that nerves were a common occurrence within young brides.

For a moment, his smile became almost kind. "Do not fear me, Karna, I shall provide for you; you will want for nothing as my wife."

"I assure you, I am certain of it, Master Lavarin," she replied. "I shall hope to be a good wife to you, that Tash may honour our union."

Beholding this meekness and docility within his future bride only encouraged Lavarin. So much so that he dared to bring her hand to his lips. He sucked upon the smooth skin in delight for a moment, before recalling himself and releasing her apologetically.

"I would not be the cause of your being late for your employment; I bid you good day Karna. Please give my compliments to your honoured father."

Unable to trust herself to respond, Karna merely nodded and forced a strained smile. She fled with Tarlana, desperately trying to keep the tears from her eyes.

But once they had escaped from the market square and the prying eyes of strangers, Tarlana turned to her sister, tear pricking her own eyes.

Desperate to gain control of her emotions, Karna stopped for a moment and leant against a wall. She struggled to fight back the tears that threatened to spill down her cheeks, her head in her hands.

She stood like this for a matter of minutes, watched by an anxious Tarlana. Uncertain about what to do, a mixture of pity and concern chased through her mind. In the end, however, she was not forced to act because Karna straightened. Her face was passive and the tears were wiped from her eyes.

But in a way, Tarlana found this reaction more upsetting than the other. Now instead of confiding in her, Karna had become completely aloof. She didn't share either her dreams and hopes or her worries. She had become a closed book, isolating herself from others so completely, that even their mother could not gain anything more than a passive answer from her.

In the past week, Tarlana had lost all touch with her older sister, and in her place was a quiet, restrained girl who never spoke without careful consideration. She missed the real Karna. She missed their whispered giggles and confessions as they walked to and from work.

It was this sense of loss which pushed Tarlana to suddenly exclaim, "Karna, why will you not speak with me any more? Are you not upset?"

With an infuriatingly mild expression, Karna turned to her sister. "I do speak with you, Tarlana," she replied calmly, "and though I might have been surprised by the … enthusiasm of Master Lavarin's action, it is to be expected. He is my betrothed."

"But Karna, you have been so altered this week, you are no longer yourself."

For a moment, Tarlana saw pain in those dark eyes, before it was replaced by the now normal calm,

"My sister, we are all forced to grow up. With that comes the letting go of our immaturity. It is a choice that we are all forced to make."

"At the consequence of destroying a part of who you are?"

Karna blanched, and Tarlana could see the struggle she was undergoing in her attempt to maintain control.

"You struggle Karna, I can see it in your eyes. Why are you forsaking your very nature? Everyone loves you for who you are; no-one can recognise this new girl who had appeared this past week. I am sure that even Master Lavarin would prefer to have the old Karna for his wife."

Suddenly, Karna could not bear it. She felt her restraint give way and, try though she might, she could not stop the tears that began to fall.

"I have to," she confessed, "if I do not accept what your father has decided Tarlana, I shall cause our mother such pain and bring yet more dishonour upon our family. I never wanted to distance myself from you all, but it is the only way that I can do this; I cannot marry Master Lavarin as I am; it would kill me. His gesture …"

She did not divulge further, but the shudder that ran through her spoke just as plainly of the dread that she felt about the blacksmith.

"But Karna why must you change who you are, merely to live?" Tarlana asked. She took her older sister in her arms and let her sob for the first time, shedding a week of suppression and misery.

After she had regained control, Karna wiped her eyes. "I have to change and accept the fate that Tash (may he be praised) has deigned to be my destiny. I must let go of my hopes Tarlana, because they do nothing but encourage me to fight, to not acknowledge your father's right to choose my husband."

Though her sister's words saddened her, Tarlana was finally able to comprehend Karna's odd behaviour. She could at least endeavour to help her sister accept her duty and fulfil it.

"You will not have to do it alone," she stated firmly, gently smoothing her sister's hair. "But never, never isolate yourself again, oh my sister. It broke my heart to not know you this past week, it was as though I was living with another person entirely."

Karna returned the hug gratefully, finally managing a smile. "Then I shall be able to face it."

For the first time in what seemed like an age, Tarlana also found herself smiling,

"I love you Karna," she said, "I know it is frowned upon to speak in such a manner, but I cannot help it. You are my sister, and you have never failed to make me smile, to comfort me when I was forlorn. What sort of a sister would I be if I did not help you in your own time of need?"

Karna merely stared at her sister for a moment as though she had never truly seen her before. By appearance, she was a normal Calormene girl, but within her, there was a wisdom that Karna had never been able to see. But it was not just wisdom, but also an understanding of who she was, of what place she had in their society, and a calm acceptance of that.

She saw their mother's patience, her fortitude, and felt suddenly ashamed. In all the years of their life together, she had ever thought of Tarlana as young and fanciful, admiring the prince. She had never considered the young woman that her sister was becoming, the way she had grown, and now truly regretted it.

"I love you as well, my sister, and I am sorry for the pain that I have brought you." Tarlana smiled,

"Then we had better not tarry any longer. We shall be late for work if we do not, and I for one would rather not lose my employment this day."

With an amused smile, Karna followed her sister without a word.

* * *

Lord Peridan of Narnia was seriously considering whether the day he was now enduring could to be counted among the most tedious of his existence.

He had bourne the company of Tarkhaan Dallakin and his wife, Tarkheena Lasaraleen for the entirety of the morning. It was becoming difficult to appear interested in the endless prattle of the attractive, though rather silly Tarkheena and the thoughtful, deliberate pauses of her grave, stolid husband, who might have been the contemporary of her father in age.

"Tell me, my dear Lord Peridan, when did you say that the queen and her brother were arriving?"

"Queen Susan the gentle and her great brother, King Edmund are to arrive with the birth of the next new moon, my lady Tarkheena," he replied politely.

"You must await their arrival with much anticipation. Are you not of close fellowship with the kings and queens?"

"They are, my lady, as close to me as kin. I do look upon the kings as my brothers, and their majesties the queens Susan and Lucy, as my sisters."

At this, the lady simpered, fluttering her eyelashes in what Peridan could only consider a coquettish manner. "You must be greatly trusted by the kings then, my Lord Peridan, to think of them in such an intimate manner."

Forcing himself to refrain from sighing in aggravation, Peridan merely nodded. This was a question which almost every Tarkhaan or Tarkheena he met asked of him.

"Wise indeed is the man who places his trust in none but the companions of his bosom," Dallakin remarked. "For as the poet says, within them does one find the surest loyalty."

"Quite so, my dear," Lasaraleen agreed, nodding her head so vigorously that her large gold earrings jangled in an almost theatrical manner. This gesture reminded Peridan of the differences between that of Calormen and Narnian style.

Within his own land, not even ladies of high birth had their ears pierced, and yet within Calormen, he had noticed that even the peasant maids had at least their ears pierced. The Tarkheenas had not only their ears, but often their noses pierced as well, adorning themselves as heavily as was humanly possible.

Tarkheena Lasaraleen was no exception to this, having the large golden hoops adorning her ears, a delicate sapphire within her nose, countless gem-encrusted bangles upon her wrists, and a slender golden thread around her neck, upon which rested the largest ruby that Peridan had ever seen.

In comparison, he thought of the manner in which Susan and Lucy clothed themselves; not with a constant display of wealth, but simply and yet with real elegance. They always chose fine cloth for their gowns to be cut from, but in a way that flattered in its simplicity. Even then, it was only Susan who always wore dresses. Both sisters shared a love of archery, but Lucy preferred to ride or hunt, when her sister would sew or read.

"My lord?" Startled from his thoughts, Peridan turned to the Tarkheena was a polite smile.

"I am sorry, my lady, I must confess to being distracted, what was your question?"

"I was just asking as to whether there are many feasts within your land? We are invited to the palace almost every day, for the Tisroc (may he live forever), has come to greatly favour my husband."

Dallakin merely nodded gravely, "He has been so great as to order my husband to lead a patrolling campaign of our country's southern-most border. It is a great honour, is it not, oh my husband?"

"As the poet says, oh my wife, where Tash the inexorable, the irresistible does deign to act, we are but pawns for him to use as he will. I will fulfil the will of our great Tisroc, (may he live forever), and pray that it may be done according to the will of Tash, (may he be praised)."

"Oh yes indeed, my husband, I am sure that you will. My Lord Peridan, have you such duties to fulfil within your own land?"

"Yes, my lady Tarkheena, I am often called upon to lead patrols of our borders by the great kings of my land. High King Peter is a wise and just ruler."

"And do you have many feasts or celebrations, my lord?"

"Oh, indeed my lady. We have feasts to celebrate the coming of every season, in the late summer, a great feast upon the shore that is below Cair Paravel. We all come together around a large fire, every man and beast together in fellowship, celebrating and thanking Aslan for the coming of another bountiful harvest."

"A feast upon a beach, my lord? All of you together?" The Tarkheena inquired in surprise.

"Yes, my lady. All together, celebrating and feasting until the early hours of the morning."

"Do the ladies not worry about the soiling of their dresses? What of the slaves?"

"We have none, my lady Tarkheena. Only servants, and they are all fairly paid, but upon celebrations we all celebrate our fellowship together. It is only the kings and queens who are seated upon chairs, and then, even they remain during only the thanksgiving ceremony, by way of tradition."

Lasaraleen was astounded, "And do the queens sit on the sand as well? Do they speak with … beasts?"

"Yes, my lady, for within my land of Narnia, the talking beasts are held with as great a respect as any man. Indeed, a dear friend of mine is a learned Raven named Sallowpad, and a more worthy creature could not be found, I do assure you."

At this statement the Tarkheena's expression was one of complete shock, "You are able to converse with these beasts, my lord Peridan?"

"Yes, my lady Tarkheena."

"And are all of the creatures within your land treated with such respect?"

"No, my lady, only the talking beasts. We have a bountiful amount of dumb beasts as well; it is these that we hunt. It would be murder to kill one who spoke."

Throughout this conversation, Tarkhaan Dallakin had merely nodded thoughtfully, occasionally stroking his beard sagely, as though considering every word that was spoken. However, within the silence that followed Peridan's final statement, he finally spoke of his own volition,

"As the poet does say, 'all things that are not of Tash's deigning will follow their own path, whether in aimless meander or to destructive end.' But this is not for us to decide, is it, my lord Peridan? Let us trust our fate to Tash (may he be praised), and his great will."

As these words were spoken, Peridan caught the Tarkhaan's gaze in surprise. There was malevolence within those dark eyes that.

For the first time in the duration of his visit, caused Peridan to lift a silent prayer to Aslan for courage.

* * *

Author's note:

Bit of a filler chapter this time – I wanted to explain the change in Karna and explore Peridan's interactions with the Calormenes a bit more.

I included such vivid detail from Lavarin's perspective because I wanted to explain his perspective of the betrothal and justify his actions from his perspective. I know he isn't a very appealing character, but I wanted to explore his perspective a little to give a better understanding to what is going to happen next chapter. (One hint: drama!)

Huge thanks to anyabar1987, ZoeyRain and meldahlie. Your reviews were just so encouraging because you really take the time to explain your thoughts and encourage me. Reviews like these are just wonderful and make all my efforts worth- while! Thank you SO much!

Meldahlie – your comment about showing rather that telling fascinated me so much that I went back to read through and I see what you mean, thank you for making me ponder and re-read!

Sadly, I have now returned to the world of world after a glorious summer holiday and my timetable is very packed since I was promoted, so updated may have to come bi-weekly. But I am aiming to try and get a chapter up every 10 days. This is a form of escapism for me!

Sorry for the long note, but thank you so much for every review and please read and let me know what you think of this chapter.

Thanks again,

Breeze.


	8. Choices

Daring to Dream

Chapter Seven

Choices

 _-dedicated to Sally Grant_

Warning: If you do not like violence, then I must warn you that there is semi-explicit reference to an animal sacrifice within this chapter, so if you would not rather read it, please skip over it.

* * *

Karna tossed restlessly on her mattress, unable to sleep. Thoughts of Master Lavarin chased her mind, making her shudder. Try though she might, she could not get comfortable as the remembrance of his sly, lustful looks filled her with revulsion.

In a final attempt to shake off her trepidation, Karna allowed herself to think of that which she had purposefully ignored for days - her dreams and hopes.

In a moment of rare bliss, she dreamed of an existence where her wildest imaginings could be real. Where she would be able to choose whom she would marry, where none had to suffer and all had enough to eat.

It was a life where her homeland would be green and lush, with water flowing through dewy forest glades. It was a life where the god that they worshipped would act for the good of those that he had created. As a people they would not praise the powerful, but the compassionate, the truthful, the just, the caring.

While Karna allowed her imagination to run wild, a single word entered her mind.

Narnia.

In her mind's eye, she pictured the land that Peridan had described. In place of Tashbaan's dusty, cobbled streets with Calormen's warm, arid climate, she imagined high green hills, deep, lush valleys and rivers running everywhere. She thought of the small, carefully tended gardens of the Tarkhaans and Tarkheenas homes, imagining them as unordered and wild, growing freely across a vast landscape.

She envisaged a society where people went about their daily lives with joy, not attempting to be mysterious and distant, but real and honest. They would throw back their heads to laugh in joy and not be afraid to openly showing affection to one another.

She dreamt of a land where the heavenly being that they worshipped did not seek to destroy the life that he had created, but protect it. Maybe even love it, because it was his creation.

Karna attempted to picture the lion in her thoughts. She could recall the sweetness of his breath, the tenderness of his lick, the calm of his voice. But at the same time she remembered his claws, saw the power of the animal, and instead of fearing them, felt reassured.

In her head, Karna saw the lion's face and heard the words that he had almost seemed to speak repeated,

"Courage, dear one."

She was back in the garden, and the lion was there. He regarded her with those wise, depthless eyes. Yet that face also held strength, power and most amazingly of all - love.

He approached slowly and softly breathing upon her. The same sweet, wonderful breath lightened her heart in a way she couldn't describe.

He gently touched his nose to hers, and spoke. "Peace, my daughter. Your sufferings are not in vain."

Amazed, Karna realised that she truly was speaking to the lion. This was not a dream at all.

Without knowing how she dared, she spoke, "Please, sir, are you the one who is worshipped in Narnia?"

"I am. I am Aslan."

Karna gasped. "The great lion that Peridan spoke of?"

In response, the beast nodded his great shaggy head, "But do not fear me, Karna, daughter of Harradin. Though I am a lion and would not hesitate to do attack my enemies, I am also the protector of my children. Does a lioness not protect her cubs against any predator?"

"I have seen your suffering, and know that you fear. Take heart my daughter, you will find the joy that you seek. But also know that the path to joy will be wracked with great sorrow. You will need to trust in your courage, but also in me."

"What do you speak of, sir? What great sorrow?"

"I cannot say, child. You must learn to trust. Know that not every situation is as it would first appear to be. Most importantly know that you are never alone, dear one."

With these words, he bent his head and gently touching her brow with his tongue before turning to leave.

Realising that he was going, Karna called out, "Must you go?"

He turned for a moment, and seemed to smile at her, "It will not be long before we meet again, my daughter. Fear not, but trust in those who love you."

* * *

The days passed with a greater rapidity than Karna could stand. Before she knew it, she was being fitted for the wedding gown and her mother was sewing a necklace of copper and silver coins to represent her dowry. Tarlana was sent scurrying to the market for different foods each day, in readiness for the great meal to be prepared upon the day of the wedding.

In a rare moment of peace, amidst the tumult of preparation, Karna stole away from the house on the pretext of drawing water. She walked slowly from the house, taking as much time as she dared.

Tarlana and she had met every night to discuss how her new role. Between them, they had been able to create the submissive, dutiful wife that Lavarin would eventually marry. It the part that she would be acting for the rest of her life.

But despite the position that she knew it was her duty to fulfil, Karna could not remove the lion's words from her mind. _"Your sufferings are not in vain … you will find the joy you seek."_ What had he meant by it?

Karna was so wrapped up in her own thoughts that she did not think of where she was walking. When she did finally stop, she found to her astonishment that she had been moving in the direction of Master Tirshan's house. Instantly afraid that she might meet Lavarin by chance, Karna hurried back the way that she had come. The street was so busy that she was forced to delay, hurriedly pushing her way through.

Suddenly, a voice cut through the din of shouts and braying of mules, making her heart leap.

"Way, way for the barbarian lords of the north!"

Karna was not given time for extra thought as she was pushed firstly from one way and then from another as people struggled to get out of the procession's way. In the end, she found herself standing in the front row of the crowd as the group of foreigners passed.

She could not help smiling as she saw the merry, pale faces. All of them lacking the beards and turbans of the Calormens and looking, in her opinion, much nicer for it.

She was about to move on, when she saw Peridan. He was laughing as he walked, talking amiably with another man and oblivious to his surroundings. Karna watched him go by, wishing with all her heart that she could have just another moment's conversation with him, but knowing that it was impossible.

But in a way, she was glad that she would not. It would almost have seemed like a moment of delusion, before she accepted her fate. No it was easier to treasure the conversation that they had had and not wish for more.

The Narnian party had, by this time, all but passed by. She walked across the street to find a way through the crowd when she saw something glinting on the ground. It was a dagger.

Finely carved and clearly valuable she picked it up, staring in awe at the workmanship that had gone into it. The blade was silver, with pearl worked into the handle. She glanced up at the retreating party, knowing that it must have been dropped by one of their number.

Karna stood there for a moment, indecisive. She was torn between wishing to see Peridan and feeling afraid to approach. In the end the decision was made for her and before she knew it, she was face-to-face with a Narnian lord. He was barely taller than she but much broader with a thin, noble face and thoughtful eyes that were somewhere between grey and green.

"I am sorry," she stuttered, nodding her head and making to leave, forgetting that she held the dagger in her hand.

"Wait," he said, in a voice that expected to be obeyed. Karna halted, not daring to lift her eyes. The horror of what she had been about to do dawned on her.

"I believe that you have something that belongs to me," he said, waiting expectantly.

With a shaking hand, Karna was about to place the dagger in his when a familiar voice called, "Marken, have you found your dagger?"

Before Karna could react, Peridan stood before her - tall and suddenly frightening. He stared for a moment at his companion, before turning to look at the girl who stood opposite.

Recognition crossed his face. "Karna!"

"You know this girl?" Marken was surprised. "How did you come to be acquainted?"

"This is the girl I sat with on the evening of our welcome feast," Peridan explaimed. He turned to Karna with a smile. Reassured, she felt her fear leave her.

"But how do you come to be here? Why are you not at work?"

Hurriedly bowing her head, Karna lowered her eyes. "I am soon to quit my employment of Master Tirshan, my lord."

"Really? Why would that be?"

"I am to married, my lord. I will therefore not need the employment."

Both men gasped. "Married? But Karna, you cannot be above seventeen."

"I am eighteen year old, my lord."

"But you are so young, too young for marriage surely."

Karna raised her head in surprise, "Indeed I am not, my lord. I am old to be getting married. My younger sister was recently wed and she was fifteen."

Both men looked at Karna in horror, "How old are they normally married in this land?" Marken asked his friend.

Peridan shrugged, his voice suddenly sad as he addressed Karna, "Could you tell us?"

Still surprised, Karna replied without thought of decorum. "The majority of girls are married at the age of fifteen or sixteen, my lords."

A thought suddenly struck Peridan, "Do you wish to marry this man, Karna?"

In embarrassment, she lowered her eyes, wishing that she had not spoken so openly,"Of course my lord, my father has chosen him for me and I am content."

Not convinced, the Narnian lord raised her chin, forcing her to look into his eyes. He remembered their conversation from the feast quite clearly and he found the real answer clearly in her face.

"Why is your father forcing you to marry?"

Karna bowed her head, trying to stop her voice from shaking, "It is his will, my, lord. I cannot act otherwise; it would bring dishonour to my family and pain my mother. I would not do that."

Not wishing to force her, Peridan merely nodded.

Confused by this strange conversation, Marken watched first his friend, and then this girl, wondering at what lay between them.

She did not seem to be different from any other Calormen woman that he had seen. She wore a simple, slightly stained dress which showed her humble upbringing. Though quite pretty, even by Narnian standards, he could see nothing very unusual about her. Only her height surprised him. She could not be much shorter than he himself, and the majority of the common people that he had seen within Tashbaan were always of a shorter, stockier build. But this girl was tall and surprisingly slender.

What was also strange was the intensity with which Peridan beheld her. For one who was normally so straight-laced and practical, he was regarding this girl with an expression that was a weird mixture of compassion, sadness, and oddly, determination.

Usually Peridan was quick to laugh, but practical enough to not be troubled by much. However he was also fiercely loyal, and was now giving it to a Calormene servant girl that he had met but once.

Anxious to have some questions answered, Marken remembered the original reason for his returning. He saw that his dagger was still held firmly in the girl's hand - so tightly that her knuckles were white.

"I am sorry for your plight," he said with real regret, "but I am afraid that we must be going, or we shall be late for our luncheon with the grand Vizier. May I have my dagger?"

Karna blushed at the realisation that she was still holding it, and hurriedly handed it over. She avoided Peridan's eyes as she did so. Although he tried to read her face he did not grasp her chin again, regretting that he had the first time.

"I am sorry for the mistake, my lord," she replied, bowing low to Marken and hurrying off into the crowd; her mind a jumble of confusion, fear and exhilaration.

* * *

Normally known for his restraint, Marken struggled greatly as he and Peridan headed towards the large, luxurious home of the Grand Vizier. He managed to bite back a number of questions that were on the tip of his tongue. But he was intrigued and could not blame himself for wanting to ask Peridan about the nature of his interest in the servant girl.

He was freely willing to admit that the traditions of Calormen differed greatly to that of Narnia and at times seemed bordering on barbaric to him. But why did this particular girl inspire such loyalty from his friend?

In their long friendship, he had never known Peridan to attach himself so firmly and swiftly to another, excepting the kings and queens, to whom he was as close as a brother. This behaviour was decidedly odd for Peridan, and that truth alone fired his curiosity to an almost unbearable level.

However, all thought of the girl was swept from his mind, as they entered the Grand Vizier's home and were instantly surrounded by people. Slender, pretty slave girls in beautiful clothes danced to one side, fierce, heavily armed guards stood at every wall and at the centre adorned in a jewelled turban and heavily embroidered robes stood Ahoshta Tarkhaan, the Grand Vizier himself.

He bowed to them, a gesture which they returned with less of a flourish, but a great deal more grace. Before he then proceeded to welcome them in the name of Tash, the hideous spectre that they worshipped, and ushered them regally into the grand dining hall of his home.

It was a large, elaborately furnished room hung with bright silks. Yet, despite the beauty of the day; the windows were shut fast and the air heavy with incense. He motioned his guests into their seats, and then, with a dramatic wave of his arms, ushered a group of slaves into the hall, bearing a covered object between them.

"Barbarian lords of the north," the Grand Vizier exclaimed, "honoured guests of the Tisroc (may he live forever), I present to you a spectacle never before seen by any of your land. A sight that will glorify the great god Tash, the inexorable, the irresistible, a sacrifice to his everlasting power!"

In an instant the cloth was thrown back and before them sat a girl - pale, slender and breathtakingly beautiful, she was enticingly clad with her naval and a good percentage of her legs exposed. She carried a snow-white kid. It was a charming little creature, delicate and small with large black eyes and spindly legs.

Peridan and Marken had only regarded the sight for a moment, before they saw the golden tray and silver dagger being brought forth and realised the intention of the Tarkhaan. In the next moment, the girl held down the kid while the Tarkhaan approached. He raised the knife high and they looked away, disgusted and horrified by the obvious delight with which the Tarkhaan killed the baby goat.

After the last pitiful bleat had died away they looked back. The Tarkhaan was holding the dead animal high, allowing its blood to stain the white fur. The blood trickled down in a thin, glistening thread, dropping on to the tray in thick, slow droplets. In the moments that followed, the Grand Vizier raised a loud, bellowing prayer to their god, offering their bloody sacrifice, proclaiming the greatness and dreadfulness of Tash.

It finally ended. Peridan felt unnerved and rather sickened by the spectacle. As he prayed silently to Aslan for strength, he had forced himself to endure the circumstances without flinching, and now felt weakened by the effort it had cost him.

Within Narnia, even the dumb animals were respected, and though killed for food, no man would have ever taken pleasure from the action. The fervour with which the Tarkhaan had killed the kid had appalled him, and now, try though he might, he could not lift the dread that consumed him. He had no greater wish than to be as far from this place as he could, but was completely powerless to do so.

On top of having to endure that appalling spectacle, he was also expected to sit amongst the Calormenes and act as though nothing had disgusted him, to seem as though he saw innocent newborn animals being slaughtered every day. As well as this, he had to tolerate the oily courtesy of the grand Vizier, to remark as mildly as he could upon the horrific display that he and his men had been forced to suffer. However, praise be to Aslan, he was not directly asked his opinion of the sacrifice.

When the vile meal had finally ended and after many polite good byes, he and his men gratefully left. As they did it was agreed that they would never, of their free will, return to that place.

* * *

Tarlana's morning had been a flurry of activity and between them, her mother, herself and Karna had cleaned their small dwelling from top to bottom in preparation for the arrival of her sister's betrothed. It was only when they had settled themselves for a quiet midday meal that Karna once more fell back into the reverie that had occupied her mind for the past few days.

There were now just two days before the wedding and try though she might, Tarlana could not gain a single smile from her sister. Instead, Karna had become completely inward looking, often not speaking unless spoken to directly.

It was a state that had not been missed by Hezal. Even she could not gain a smile, and was becoming deeply concerned at her daughter's deteriorating state.

Quietly, she took Tarlana by the arm and led her into the other room for some privacy.

Once there, she spoke, "My daughter, do you know what has happened to your sister? Over these past few days it seems that she has lost all recollection of who she was. She does not laugh or smile nor even talk as times. What is it that ails her? Can this truly only come from her reaction to her betrothal?"

Tarlana saw the fear in her mother's eyes. Tears stung her own as she responded,

"Oh my mother! She said that she couldn't be herself and submit to this marriage. She has decided that she would rather act the role of a submissive wife for the rest of her life than cause you pain."

In that moment, Hezal's face paled so drastically that Tarlana thought she would faint. Suddenly motionless, she brought her hand to her mouth, closing her eyes as though in pain. She clutched for the table, sitting heavily on the chair.

"Mother, are you well?" Tarlana asked in alarm, hurrying to fetch some water.

In response, her mother simply sat with her head in her hands, unable to control the sobs that burst from her normally placid self.

Over and over, she said the same simple phrase. "What have I done? Oh what have I done?"

Surprised by the sudden noise from the kitchen, Karna came through the doorway. She was immediately as alarmed as Tarlana by the sight of Hezal. Hurrying over, she put a comforting hand upon her mother's shoulder.

"Mother, what ails you? Are you unwell?"

Looking up with eyes that were half-blinded by tears, Hezal beheld her. Her pain and sorrow were etched into every feature and line of that gentle face.

"Oh Karna my daughter, what have I done to you?"

Horrified by the guilt she saw, Karna took the cup of water from Tarlana and gently eased it into her mother's shaking hands.

"Peace Mother you must drink something. Please, you are not well."

Her mother shook her head, "No my daughter, I am well. It is you who are not."

Karna stared at her mother in surprise, "Mother, what do you mean? I am quite well."

"No, my daughter, you are not. You are abandoning who you are to reconcile yourself to a marriage, as I told you to."

Karna suddenly understood and took her mother's face in her hands. Gently, she kissed Hezal's forehead. "Mother, it could not have been any other way."

Shaking her head, her mother sighed and took her daughter's hands in her own.

"I would not see you become a shadow of yourself, Karna. You have too much joy in life to live it as a ghost. Your gift is such a rare one and it breaks my heart to see you let it go. I was wrong."

Karna felt tears coming to her eyes as they sat, hands clasped, miserable in the acknowledgement of what their existence was and both knowing that there was no escape from it. The next moment in a rare moment of release, they shared a desperate embrace; both allowing the tears to fall as they took comfort from one another. They let themselves openly mourn for the life that could never be, for the unreachable dreams that characterised youth.

How Karna wished that she had the stoic patience of Tarlana, able to accept her lot in life. But she had never had it. She knew that even in her loveless marriage, she would always hope for better. It was this strength that would carry her forward, though she didn't know where it would lead her.

After a time, both women regained their composure.

"This is the way it has to be, Mother," Karna stated, "I have to marry Lavarin, or Tarneesh will banish me from beneath this roof, you know this is true."

Though she felt fresh tears threatening, Hezal nodded at the truth of her daughter's words.

"I will be provided for, and I can ask no more than that."

With this settling of her emotions, Karna felt ready and composed as she prepared to face her fate with courage.

So though it greatly saddened her, she took her memories of Peridan and Narnia, her dream of the lion, Aslan and with the best of her ability, banished them from her mind.

* * *

Author's note:

In a word – evil – I know!

I apologise if this chapter is a little confusing with Aslan giving hope and then that ending, but it goes in conjunction with the next chapter. So all will be revealed!

I am sorry if the animal sacrifice was a little graphic, but I am trying to be realistic in my portrayal of Calormene society. Lewis portrayed the Calormene's as very luxurious and over the top in their gestures so I am trying to follow this model, though this chapter did show a darker side of it. However, I am going to show another side of Calormene society in the next chapter!

The concept of marrying for love would also have been a very unusual one in their society. Before the 1600s in Britain, marriage was purely a monetary thing where alliances were made between families of a similar social standing. I used this for the basis of my portrayal of Karlis and Ahoz's marriage – with social convention being carefully followed.

I want to thank each and every person who is reading this story and following it. Particularly I want to thank Anyabar1987 and Meldahlie for once again reviewing – they mean so much!

Also thank you Allisonreader, Narniac4aslan and Rosazul66 for reviewing for the first time. I am so delighted that you are enjoying this journey with my through Calormen and Lewis's wonderful world!

I am sorry that it has been three weeks since my last update. But parents' evenings and trip meetings have had me working several 13 hour days (joys of education as a profession!). I hope things will calm down slightly more now and I might manage a two week update for chapter 9!

Many, many thanks to all of your kind reviewers and readers. Please let me know what you think, constructive criticism is very welcome!

Breeze.


	9. Facing the Consequence

Daring to Dream

Chapter Eight

Facing the Consequence

Master Lavarin the blacksmith strode through the streets of butchers' quarter, his wide face plastered with a cocky smile. He nodded to his neighbours in the same manner that one might have expected of the Tisroc himself.

That day, Lavarin was so assured of his brilliance and so delighted by his choice of wife, that he would probably not have cared even if he had noticed others smirking. With great care he smoothed his new robe, wanting to appear as handsome and alluring to his future wife as possible.

In preparation for the event he had carefully chosen a new robe of a rich red material, now tucked closely about his portly frame. His beard had been carefully scented with eucalyptus, and a new turban of snow-white linen sat upon his head. Overall, he had taken great pains to appear as appealing as possible to his young wife.

Though a vain man, there was no cruelty in Lavarin, merely a painfully high self-esteem. It was upon this basis that he believed himself worthy of fair Karna's hand, and upon a similar foundation that he believed her to have accepted him.

When he finally came to the doorway of her home, he left a suitable moment for a dramatic pause before knocking. With a solemn nod to the younger daughter who opened the door, he entered the home.

Karna's father was acknowledged with a grave bow.

"Master Tarneesh," he began, his voice a carefully balanced pitch. "I thank you most graciously for the hospitality of your home. Has not the poet said that _'the welcome of a worthy man is worth more than the bows of a hundred enemies.'_ "

Tarneesh bowed to Lavarin with equal severity before responding,

"I welcome you, Master Lavarin, to my home. The poet has also said, that _'the polite welcome of a fellow Calormen is far greater than the banquet of a barbarian'_. You are very welcome within this house, in the name of Tash, the inexorable, the irresistible. I greet you, he who is to very soon be kin of me."

Both men bowed to each other once more, before Lavarin took the chair that Tarneesh offered. He regarded the other man with the gravity that was considered as a mark of high breeding within Calormen.

They spoke for a time, watched over by the two sons of the carver, sombrely standing behind their father. However, only a few minutes had passed before Lavarin referred to his betrothed. With a smug smile, Tarneesh nodded, bidding his wife bring Karna forth.

With a bow to her husband, Hezal moved towards the other room. She was gone but a moment and returned with Lavarin's betrothed.

Karna was dressed as expected, in the ornate gown of red and gold. Her dark hair was neatly braided and a simple necklace of silver and bronze coins adorned her neck, a symbol of her dowry. She was a beautiful bride.

With lowered eyes she was led forward, bowing gracefully before her promised husband.

From the moment of her appearance, Lavarin had watched with great appreciation. From the graceful sway of her hips as she moved to the shy modesty of her beauty as she cast her eyes down and the alluring jangle of her anklet as she moved, he was amazed at his luck at having purchased such a wife.

Lavarin was so gratified that he even allowed himself to exchange a triumphant smile with her father. He was surprised and gladdened to see the same expectation upon Tarnessh's face at the prospect of the marriage.

To the normal eye Karna appeared to be the perfect bride - attractive, biddable and obedient. She dipped an elegant curtsey to her intended and even managed a small smile as she inclined her head to her father. As tradition dictated, she seated herself at his feet, in the place of total submission to his will.

It was only Tarlana and their mother that saw the brittleness of the smile and the utter melancholy of her expression as she sat at her father's feet. Though she played it well they could both see the truth.

She was dying inside; letting go of all that she had been, in order to cope with reality.

The minutes that followed were excruciating for Tarlana. She watched the sister she loved serve Lavarin, smiling shyly as he leered blatantly at her, often taking her hand and kissing it with sticky lips. But this thing that many fathers would have objected to, merely amused Tarneesh. He found moments to strategically ignore it, suddenly seeming very interested in his food or in ordering his wife to fetch more wine.

It was the same lustful action that had driven Karna to tears of hysteria. Yet, it was now a thing that she would have to bear for the rest of her life.

Tarlana watched with some pain. She stood, obediently silent as the family watched the proceedings, feeling completely powerless. Above all else, she wished that she could help Karna, but there was nothing she could do.

For her, the prospect of marrying such a man would not have caused nearly so much heartache and melancholy as it had for Karna. Hers was a temperament of patience and she had learnt to accept her lot in life without complaint, as her mother had. But for Karna, that patience existed without the gentle and stoic acceptance.

Where Tarlana could endure and draw strength from that meekness which she and her mother shared, Karna could not. Her sister had too vivid an imagination, to vivacious a nature and too strong a hope to accept the reality of an existence where she could not even dream of gaining what she sought from life. She had always had a natural cheerfulness and love of life that Tarlana had admired and loved about her. But when faced with the principle of enduring, it was Tarlana who proved to have the greater strength.

At the table, Tarneesh and Lavarin were heavily absorbed in their conversation about the likelihood of the Prince's marriage to the foreign queen, the barbarian beauty of the north. Karna sat, only partially listening to their discussion. She was still seated upon the floor but seemed relieved at her momentary release from Lavarin's attentions.

For a moment she was distracted by the action of brushing dust from her skirt, but then she became aware of being watched. She looked up, catching Tarlana's gaze with her own.

The expression in those eyes was timeless and in all her life, Karna's sister would never forget it. There was an immense sadness. It was a melancholy that seemed to consume her very soul. At the same time a great love lingered in her expression - an affection that shone forth and was almost more emphasised by the sadness.

But mingled with this emotion there was something that ran deeper than the melancholy, deeper than even the love.

It was spirit.

A spirit that all the restraint in the world would not be able to suppress, a spirit that her greatest attempts could not withhold.

Tarlana saw that spirit and felt both joyful and the fearful at the sight of it. The battle within her sister's heart seemed to be costing her dearly.

None but she saw the inner torment that Karna was struggling with and none but she saw the hope that refused to let her sister darken its unquenchable light.

* * *

The night was drawing in, taking with it the last rays of the dying sun's light as it enfolded the land in its velvety darkness. Lost in thought, a woman sat gazing out upon the blackening sky. The clear, jewel-bright stars shone above the tranquil waters of the sea.

A knocking drew her from her reverie.

"Come in."

A young woman was framed against the darkness of the passageway. Her usually merry face was pensive as she approached.

Her sister rose to greet her. "This is a pleasant surprise," Susan began with a smile, but something in her sister's face stopped her, "why so sombre, Lucy?"

The young queen observed her sister, seeming to choose her words with care. "Susan, are you sure that you wish to do this?"

In surprise, Susan assured her that she did.

"But do you truly know his character?"

"Yes I think I do, Lu," Susan replied, with growing bafflement. "Why would I not? Do you not think him worthy? Do you doubt his intentions?"

Uncertain and clearly troubled Lucy began to pace the chamber, before coming to stop before her sister. "I don't know why I feel this way," she admitted, "but I saw something false in his manner when we last met. I feel a foreboding, some anxiety for your safety."

"But what have you to fear, Lucy? I shall have Edmund for an escort and he shall hold my safety as his utmost priority. Not to mention the presence of dear Peridan there these past weeks. Surely he shall have made the preparations and discovered the expectations of both Prince Rabadash and his father."

Her anxiety rising, Lucy flew to her sister's side, "Do you mean to accept him then, Susan?"

Her older sister paused. She contemplated for a long moment, before eventually admitting, "I am uncertain, Lucy. To marry one such as he … to live so great a distance from our fair land, and to make so great a commitment to a man I hardly know … I truly am not sure."

Lost in thought, her fingers unconsciously took a lock of her long hair, braiding and unbraiding it in pensive agitation. After a while, she turned to her younger sister, suddenly feeling a little afraid.

"Do you think that I should refuse him?"

Lucy waited a few moments, not wanting to prejudice her sister's decision.

"Only you can make that decision, Su. My advice would be to trust your own judgement and discover Rabadash's true nature. I personally have my doubts, as do Peter and Edmund. But this is your choice and whatever decision you make, we shall support you, always be sure of that."

Susan's smile faded and she merely nodded, her heart suddenly troubled.

* * *

All about Tashbaan the evening was drawing in, bringing with it a much needed cooling of the air after the oppression of the day's heat. In the back streets of the city women opened their doors, letting the fresher air blow through the dusty stuffiness of their dwellings. The fragrance of cooking food mingled with the smell of sweat as men returned from their long day's work.

In one such dwelling a young wife stood, gently humming to herself as she stirred the stew she had prepared for her husband's evening meal. Her face was utterly content as she tasted the broth and added a little seasoning. With a careful eye she checked the preparations she had made before moving through the doorway into their sleeping chamber to quickly pull a wooden comb through her dark hair in anticipation of her husband's return.

She was unable to stop herself smiling as she returned to the fireplace. Within marriage she had found the one thing that she had always dreamed of, a bond of understanding and love with her husband.

With a gentle sigh she moved towards the door way. She glanced out into the narrow dustiness of the back street and looked up to watch the vibrant azure of the sky soften to a paler blue as the sun set in the west. Across the road, the eldest daughter of one of her neighbours swept the ground outside their dwelling with an old broom, singing softly to herself as she did so.

Glancing up, the girl smiled at her as she paused in her activity, "Good evening, Karlis," she said.

"Good evening Morana," Karlis replied amiably, "how do you fare this evening? Is your family well?"

Morana smiled, "We are all well, I thank you. We simply await the return of father and my brother." For a moment, she merely watched Karlis, a mischievous grin lightening her face, "you seem as happy as always. Your face is never without a smile and my mother always marvels at your cheerfulness."

Morana's expression softened, "I do not need ask why it is so. It is easy to see, and lightens my own heart to see a husband and wife so happily married."

Karlis looked down, slightly embarrassed for a moment. But there was no denying it, and she knew it. She looked at Morana and smiled, "I hope that you might have such joy in your own marriage as I have in mine, Morana."

Morana regarded her, now solemn. "I too hope for that Karlis. Tash has blessed you, (may he be praised), and I am happy for you. To see you so happy always lightens my own day and helps me to hope that I might have such a man as Ahoz in my future."

She opened her mouth to continue, but the calling of her name from her house stopped her. With a final smile she disappeared, quickly closing the door.

Her smile fading slightly as her thoughts turned inward, Karlis entered her own home, thinking about another wedding that was to occur the very next day. She recalled the hasty conversation that she had had with Tarlana a few days previously.

With a growing concern, she had listened to her sister relate the drastic change that had occurred in Karna. Where grave acceptance had replaced her easy smile and removed the dancing sparkle from her eyes. She had also mentioned the profound melancholy that had ceased her singing and laughter. Karna had called it an acceptance, but to Karlis it seemed more like the removal of all that made her sister so special. This marriage to Lavarin was so different to what she had always hoped and dreamed. But she had accepted it without argument.

Karlis forced her thoughts back to the stew and took it off the heat of the fire.

Why had Karna accepted the will of their father without a thought? It was just so unlike her.

With a sigh, Karlis moved towards the coolest part of the room and drew a loaf from one of the wooden shelves.

Was this not the same sister of hers who had dared to offer her comfort in her time of need, only to suffer the wrath of Tarneesh afterwards? But now, when she faced a marriage to a man that she could never love and the forced destruction of all her dreams, where was her spirit?

Karlis shook her head in confusion, cutting the bread as she did so. Her mind barely registered her actions as she attempted to make sense of the confusion that clouded her thoughts and would give her no relief of understanding.

She was still deliberating upon her sister's lack of fight when she felt a pair of arms encircle her waist and was barely able to keep hold of the knife in her shock. Feeling the touch of a cheek to her hair she turned, a smile brightening her face at the arrival of her husband.

"Good evening oh my wife and the eternal delight of my eyes," Ahoz murmured, kissing her cheek as he drew Karlis closer to him. In return, Karlis entwined one arm about his neck and smiled at Ahoz, stroking his cheek with a gentle touch.

"Good evening my husband and the true delight on my own eyes," she whispered, smoothing a hand over his hair before feeling the gentle touch of his lips to hers. They stood like this for a moment, before Ahoz forced himself to pull away.

"I praise Tash every day for you," he said softly, "to have found such love in marriage is something that I would never have thought possible."

Karlis smiled at him, "Well let us praise Tash together," she replied, kissing his again before pulling away to serve his meal.

"Sit down, my husband. I have been able to make another stew from that venison that your aunt gave us. You must thank her for me when you next see her, it has provided us with so many wonderful meals."

Ahoz grinned at the sudden change in the mood and obeyed his wife, amused. "I will be sure to thank my aunt," he assured Karlis as she placed a steaming bowl of stew before him.

He took a mouthful before looking at his young wife. Although still young, it had only taken Karlis a few days to adapt to the role of a wife and now it seemed as though she had been one for her whole life.

"Why are you smiling?" Karlis asked as she seated herself next to him. She tore some bread to dip in her own stew.

"I just find it amusing how quickly your mood can change from loving to domestic," Ahoz replied with a grin.

A smile tugging at the corners of Karlis' mouth despite her attempts to appear solemn. "Is my husband complaining about my efficiency?" she asked levelly.

Ahoz's grin widened. "Not at all, oh my wife," he teased, "I am just amazed that I have a wife so versatile that she can kiss me one minute and then thank my aunt for venison the next."

Gradually Karlis' composure broke and an unwilling giggle escaped from her mouth. The next moment, they were both laughing heartily and it was a while before either was able to stop.

"I did not mean to ruin the emotion of the moment," Karlis exclaimed, choking as she struggled to stop her laughter. "But I had been meaning to ask you to thank your aunt all day and it seemed like a good opportunity."

Ahoz nodded. "I agree, it was most kind of her and I will be sure to tell her or my uncle at the first opportunity."

Karlis nodded and returned to her dinner. With a rueful shake of her head, she sent a prayer of thankfulness to Tash for having blessed her so greatly in her marriage.

* * *

Finally alone in the solitude of his own quarters, Lord Peridan stood upon the balcony regarding Tashbaan. All about him, pinpricks of light were gradually being extinguished in dwellings across the city as the moon continued her journey across the heavens.

He sighed softly. His heart was heavy this night.

Try as he might, he could never feel at ease in this land. Neither among the pretension and oily condescension of the nobles or within the dusty aridity of the streets.

Every day he found himself longing all the more for the cool freshness of Narnia. He missed the ease and joyfulness of life at Cair Paravel among their just and merry monarchs. But as much as he longed for the arrival of Queen Susan and King Edmund, he also dreaded the coming of his friends to this place because it heralded the queen's final answer to Prince Rabadash's troth.

Dearly and with all his heart, he longed to keep Susan from this prince. He had seen nothing in this place to ease his qualms about the idea of an alliance between a young woman dearer to him than a sister, and a man as vain and arrogant as the Calormen prince.

Sighing again, Peridan allowed the pleasant freshness of the evening breeze to cool his brow. Finally, he allowed himself to relax after the stress and torment of the day.

* * *

It was late by the time that Karlis and Ahoz retired for the night. They had spent an amusing evening hearing Ahoz recount a ridiculous tale from the market that day. Karlis was just brushing her hair in preparation for sleep when they heard a gentle knocking on their door.

Ahoz glanced curiously and a little uneasily at his young wife. "Who would call at this time?" he asked. He cautiously took one of the candles and headed through to their front door.

The knocking had been growing gradually weaker and when Ahoz eventually opened it Karlis heard him gasp before calling her through. Completely mystified, she drew a shawl about her shoulders and picked up the other candle. She nearly dropped it at the sight that greeted her.

The front door was still wide open. Ahoz had immediately sprung forward to support the figure that stood at their door. It was only when he almost carried her in that Karlis was able to fully grasp the state that her oldest sister was now in.

Quickly running for water and a bowl, she told Ahoz to close the door and hurried over to Karna who sat, slumped in a chair. She was almost unconscious as she struggled to keep her head upright.

Her face was a mass of bruises, her lip was cut, blood was running from her nose and one of her eyes was so badly blackened that it was shut. Her clothes - the beautiful garments of red and gold that should have signified a joyful wedding were torn and muddied. She cradled her left arm protectively and it was not long before both Karlis and her husband realised that it was broken.

With a shuddering breath Karna forced herself to look up at Karlis, tears mingling with the blood that covered her face. Horrified by the state she was in, Karlis dipped a cloth in the water and sought to clean Karna's face, restraining her own shudder, as she felt her sister flinch with the pain.

She sent Ahoz through to their bedchamber to bring herbs to disinfect the wounds. With great care she started to nurse Karna by very gently wiping away the blood and disinfecting the wounds. She didn't speak, and merely sought to aid her sister, too horrified to ask what had happened.

Eventually, Karna's face was a lot cleaner and she was finally able to glance at her sister through her left eye, though her right was swollen shut.

In this moment, Karlis finally found her tongue. "Karna," she exclaimed, her voice coming out in a husky whisper, "what happened?"

In response, Karna wiped away the tears that fell and leant forward to gently kiss Karlis' cheek. Her voice was surprisingly calm when she replied.

"I displeased our father to the point of no forgiveness Karlis. I had actually accepted my fate and behaved as what expected for a lot of the evening, and then … suddenly, I wasn't able to bear it. I found myself unable to submit any longer. Just as father was completing the final ceremony of securing the betrothal and offering a blessing up to Tash, I couldn't bear it. I jumped up and I refused to obey.

"I can't quite remember, but I think I shouted … and father was so angry … I said that I couldn't bear to marry Lavarin. I said that I would never marry one so vile, and Master Lavarin lashed out, he said that he had never been so insulted and hit me, hard. He stormed out and Father wouldn't stop. I've never seen him so furious … he slapped me and started hitting and kicking me. At one point he picked up a chair and hit me with it."

"He shouted about how I had dishonoured him beyond forgiveness. He called me the daughter of a traitor, he spat on me and tore my clothing. He said that I would never be worthy to be called a woman of Calormen, and he threw me out of the front door. Both our brothers spat and kicked me after Father, before storming back into the house and leaving me out there."

Karna shuddered and cradled her arm all the more. She struggled visibly as tears streaked her face.

Gently, Karlis took her sister in her arms and hugged her tenderly. "You must stay here," she said firmly. "She can, can't she Ahoz?"

Her husband merely nodded and placed a gentle hand upon her shoulder. "Karlis is right, Karna, our home is your own. I will never forget your kindness to my wife on our wedding day. Karlis has never stopped speaking of your joyful laughter and the tender love that you both share. You must stay here, and I will protect you with all my strength. I promise you that no-one shall know that you are here, least of all Tarneesh."

Karna shuddered at the mention of her stepfather and nodded, helplessly grateful for their kindness and the risk that they were both taking.

Carefully, Ahoz lifted her from the chair and carried her through to their bedchamber. He set her down upon the spare mattress and Karlis tucked a blanket around her. She brought a bowl of hot water infused with some of the herbs that she had gathered.

"I will stay with her Ahoz, you go to bed. You have to work in the morning, my husband. She is my sister, and I will gladly nurse her."

Ahoz kissed his wife good night, leaving her to care for Karna.

* * *

Author's note:

I want to apologise for the long delay – it is almost exactly a month to the day since I updated. I know it's not good enough and I hope you remember what happened last chapter! The reality is a mixture of work getting ridiculous and exhaustion, but now I have a holiday so - Hurrah!

I have majorly struggled with the emotions and realism of emotion in this chapter. I know I am being vile to poor old Karna in this chapter and it's not a bed of roses for her, but it's part of the journey she has to go on to reach the end! I have tried to strike a balance between violence and realism here. I have tried very hard to be fair to Lavarin and Tarneesh because I see them mostly as the product of their upbringing and society.

On the plus side – I hope the Karlis/Ahoz scene was a bit of a break from the drama, drama, drama!

What do you think? Was it balanced? Please let me know exactly what you think! I thoroughly appreciate constructive criticism, it really helps me!

HUGE thanks to anyabar1987, meldahlie, guest (please leave your name so I can thank you properly!), Rosazul66 and Zoey Rain. Your reviews mean so much and are so worth getting for the time you take to feedback and give your input.

Thank you so much for reading and please let me know what you think!

I have two weeks of holiday so I should be able to update far sooner this time.

Thanks again,

Breeze.


	10. No Reprieve

Daring to Dream

Chapter Nine

No Reprieve

Never in her life had Tarlana known a night quite like this one. After watching her sister's spirit take hold, she had been powerless to hold her back as Karna had simply lost control. Abandoning all reserve and obedience, her tongue had taken on a will of its own.

In front of them all, she had not only refused to marry Master Lavarin but had insulted their visitor and called him vile. In short, she had disgraced her entire family in the worst possible way.

Utterly powerless, she and her mother had been forced to watch while first Lavarin and then their father had beaten her beloved older sister. She had turned away, unable to block out the cries and shrieks of Karna. When next she had dared to look, Master Lavarin was gone and Tarneesh had bodily thrown Karna out of the house before spitting on her. Eagerly, his sons had followed his example. The door had slammed and after shouting and ranting at his wife, Tarneesh had stormed through to the bedroom. He had closed the door so violently that it was nearly wrenched out of its frame.

A sleepless night in the main room had followed this as the family tried to get comfortable on the mats and tattered rugs. Once she had been sure of her brothers' slumber, Tarlana had nestled her head in her mother's lap.

She had wept silent and bitter tears as Hezal stroked her hair; murmuring over and over again, "Why? Why did you do it, Karna? Why?"

In the first light of morning she had awoken to find her mother leaning against the wall; her pale cheeks scored with tear tracks, and her eyes staring into space. Startled by Tarlana's movement, she glanced down and stroked her daughter's cheek before rising.

On the table, the remnants of the meal still sat, uneaten and some upturned by the violence. Wordlessly, Tarlana helped her mother tidy the room. With care they stepped over the two snoring figures of her brothers as they lay, sprawled upon the mats. Neither of them spoke as they worked to meticulously clean the room. Eventually with the task finished, they took the dirtied fragments of plate and left the house.

It was still very early when they arrived at the well. Few were about. Even the beggars still lay, huddled beneath their piles of rags.

So in the dim light they both sat, side-by-side. Each lost in her own thoughts, unable to speak as they thought about the previous night.

Eventually Tarlana forced herself to look at her mother and saw a reflection of the hopelessness that crushed her own heart. With an effort she managed to say what they were both thinking, but didn't wish to admit.

"She can never can home, can she?"

For a final moment, she indulged the juvenile hope that her mother might be able to do something, to say that it would be all right. Almost desperately, she sought to banish her common sense as it smothered the silly, childish hope that her sister might one day return to their home.

However, her mother's answer and tone was enough to end any foolish fancy. "No, my daughter, she is beyond our reach. Karna is lost to us. Forever."

There in the light of early morning, in that back street of Tashbaan; a mother and daughter wept openly, hugging each other. They gained what solace they could from the other's presence, weeping for a loved one whom they would never see again.

* * *

Unlike many of his companions, Lord Marken of Narnia lacked an ability to converse easily with those with whom he was not acquainted. In comparison to the courteous Peridan, he had never enjoyed meeting new people. This was something that had caused him to question King Edmund's decision to make him one of the Calormen delegation many times.

Their primary aim in being sent to Calormen ahead of the royal party was to oversee the preparation of the house within which Queen Susan was to reside. The fulfilment of this task required them to attend meals with people of influence and importance. Action done to develop acquaintances and good relations - a thing that Marken could not have been less qualified to fulfil!

They had now been in Tashbaan for over a week and every evening had been spent in feasting and polite conversation, whilst each day required engagements and the attendance of meetings. All in all, he had found their time in Calormen to be extremely dull.

It seemed both wasteful and even disconcerting, as they had been exposed to some sides of the society that he had at times thought barbaric. Only in the company of his friends had he felt the ease to laugh and truly be himself.

Now, as he dressed in a clean tunic to attend yet another lunch with the Grand Vizier, he found he anticipated little pleasure in the event.

Peridan heartily agreed with him as they met in the garden of their residence.

"I do not care for this Grand Vizier either Marken. But until Queen Susan arrives, we must maintain a show of courtesy and politeness. I am of one mind with you concerning this country and its people, though. The more I see of it, the less I am pleased."

"What do you think of Prince Rabadash?" Marken asked as they nodded to their soldiers, good men who had come as a sort of escort for their party.

"I find him as vain and untrustworthy as I did in Narnia and have spoken of this with Queen Lucy. She agreed with me entirely. There is a strangely veiled manipulation and cunning about his courtesy and gallantry to the queen. I find that I distrust him even more in his own country."

"I am glad that I am not the only one who found little to trust when he was with us at Cair Paravel …"

Marken had wished to go on but was stopped by the entrance of the Grand Vizier's guide. Both men inclined their heads as was expected in response to the guide's low bow.

"My master the esteemed Grand Vizier has asked me to escort you to his humble home. Would you please care to follow me, my lords?"

"We humbly accept the offer of your master and will follow," Peridan replied formally. He inclined his head once more to the man before he led them away down the road.

As he strode ahead, he called loudly. "Way! Way! Way for the barbarian lords of the north! Way for the lords of Narnia!"

As they passed through the dusty, cluttered streets, Peridan found himself once again wondering about the girl Karna. He recalled the expression on her face when he had last seen her. Flustered and submissive, she had shown little of the wonder and curiosity that he had seen at their welcoming feast. Instead, she had seemed almost deadened and lifeless as she had told them of her forthcoming marriage.

He had been truly shocked to find that maidens were forced to marry against their will in this country and something within him had longed to aid her in her distress. The intensity of this longing had taken Peridan by surprise.

In his life, he had ever been a man of judgement and contemplation. But now he found himself fervently wishing to help this girl, despite the impossibility and likely failure of his intervention even if he had happened to find her.

The man led them out of the busier streets and into the wide, cleaner cobbled ways that led to the gardens and palaces of the Tarkhaans and Tarkheenas. They were taken into the now familiar garden of the Grand Vizier.

As always, Peridan was struck by the lovely fragrance of the jasmine that grew in abundance. Amidst the dust and dirt of the city, the garden was a haven of beauty and serenity. But they did not dawdle in that pleasant place and had soon gone into large, cool entrance hall of Tarkhaan Ahoshta's palace.

As he entered, Peridan took in how ornately the walls were carved, beautifully inlaid with coloured stones and a masterpiece in themselves. However, he had little time to admire the beauty of the architecture. The Grand Vizier stood before them with a silken turban upon his head and a wide smile upon his overly oiled face.

He bowed low to the Narnians, emphasising the hump upon his back. He appeared rather silly, to bow so deeply and yet be bedecked as he was in all his finery. Peridan had long ago surmised that this man owed a lot of his success to having developed a great talent for flattery.

"My honoured lords, in the name of Tash - the inexorable, the irresistible, I welcome you to my humble home once more. It is indeed an honour to have been so graciously accepted by your most excellent persons. Have the poets not said that the condescension of great men is worth twenty times the flattery of a pauper?"

Playing the role that was expected of him, Peridan returned the bow with one of his own,

"We in turn do thank you, most gracious host, for the kindness of your extended invitation and in the name of Aslan, we greet you."

The Grand Vizier nodded gravely before drawing aside,

"My lords, you are most welcome, please enter and partake of your refreshment. If you have any wish whatsoever, do not hesitate to ask. My slave-girls will attend to your every whim. Refresh yourselves before beginning your meal."

Still rather embarrassed by the Calormen tradition of being waited upon hand and foot, Peridan accepted the fragranced water bowl gratefully. He failed to receive even a glance from the slave girl in response. Her eyes remained downcast and obedient.

After the rest of the Narnians had seated themselves, the Grand Vizier lowered himself into a cushioned chair. At the clap his hands, servants hurried forward bearing countless dishes and platters.

"How do you find the cuisine of Calormen compares to the fare of your own land my lord?" The Grand Vizier enquired, taking great care to only eat after his guests had started.

"I find the cuisine of Calormen quite similar, my lord," Peridan replied, "although there is a greater abundance of somewhat simpler foods eaten within Narnia. All of the food of Calormen is wide and varying. There is such a variety. The tastes are so rich and I find myself experiencing a different dish at every meal that I attend."

The Grand Vizier nodded agreeably before taking a delicate sip of wine from his goblet. He seemed to deeply contemplate every word Peridan spoke.

"We take a great deal of pride in the diversity of our cuisine, my lord Peridan. It is the mark of a good host and hostess that a guest never experiences the same dish throughout their stay. I look forward to the day when I shall have a wife to aid me in the expansion of my own table's variety."

Peridan paused. "Are you to be married, my lord Ahoshta?"

The Grand Vizier nodded sagely, attempting to remain solemn, though Peridan could see eagerness in the man's small eyes.

"I am, my lord, to take the Lady Aravis Tarkheena as my wife this coming autumn. She is the daughter of Kidrash Tarkhaan the governor of Calavar Province. A lady of great family and noble birth. I very much look forward to our forthcoming marriage."

"How old is the lady, my lord?"

"She is not yet fourteen, and of very marriageable age I have been informed by her father. He is as pleased by the match as I, and even the great Tisroc (may he live forever) has nodded in condescension at the suitability of the marriage."

"What sort of lady is she?" Peridan asked, forcing back his exclamation at the extreme youth of the bride-to-be. Within Narnia, such a child would have still been under the tutelage of her governess.

"One of grace and virtue, modesty and beauty," the Grand Vizier replied self-satisfactorily. "I have met the lady on three separate occasions and found her to be very pleasant and agreeable. These are definitely qualities to find desirable in a wife."

Peridan forced himself to keep a pleasant smile upon his face.

"Have you a wife my Lord Peridan?" The Tarkhaan asked politely.

"I have not my Lord Ahoshta. As of yet I have found no reason to desire a wife and have not met a young lady whom I might consider as compatible with myself."

The Calormen nodded solemnly,

"If one doesn't find oneself compatible with a woman it does not savour of much good for the future relationship," he agreed, taking a sip of his wine. "Have you seen any women among my own race who have caught your fancy, my lord?"

The Grand Vizier's glance became suddenly suggestive as he motioned towards the servant girls who stood along the walls. Peridan visibly struggled to maintain his composure at the implication of the Calormen's words.

"I have seen no women who would inspire such feelings within me, my lord," he replied somewhat stiffly, cutting his fish with more vehemence than was completely necessary.

It was an action that was noticeable to all in the room. Least of all the Grand Vizier who adroitly changed the subject to hunting, sensing the anger of his guest.

* * *

All of her life Karna had loved the colour green, but in the dusty, cluttered back streets of Tashbaan there was not a colour that they were less likely to find.

As a child, she had loved walking with her mother by the side of the river and catching glimpses of the green sanctuaries that had been created for the enjoyment of the Tarkhaans and Tarkheenas. Even later in her life when she had first gained her employment under Master Tirshan, she had loved walking with Tamara and her sisters amongst the vegetables gardens. They had even occasionally dared to glance into their master's own beautiful escape from the dust of the city.

But she had never walked upon grass until that strange night with the lion. Yet now, her dreams seemed to be full of the colour green. When she slept she would find herself within deep forest glades; either dancing among the trees in the firelight or lying upon grass in the sun. She was surrounded by the colour and loved it.

At night she would remember tales that her mother had told her about the colour green. Of jewels that were supposed to contain the very depths of nature in their colour - emeralds they were called.

Only in sleep did Karna find her rest and peace.

Her days were filled with a pain far greater than any that she had every experienced. Every day Karlis would sit by her, tenderly nursing her wounds and caring for her needs whilst going about her everyday life. Always keeping her hidden.

But there was very little that she was able to do for Karna's arm.

It had been hit so badly by Tarneesh that it had broken, and the result was agony for Karna. It meant that she could find no rest as she lay in perpetual misery. Rest was only found when Karlis mixed together certain herbs to give her sleep. But even then Karna would wake in the morning feeling drowsy and be ill for the rest of the day. It was a condition that did little to raise her spirits or aid her recovery.

However, the poverty of their lives meant that no doctor could be called for and, as she was, Karna was forced to suffer from the broken arm, without hope of recovery or healing.

As the days passed, she grew in strength. By the end of the week she was able to sit up in bed quite comfortably, although her lip was still badly scarred and her bruises quite prominent. She felt relatively comfortable except for her arm, and was able to feed herself with her left hand.

After much coaxing, she was finally able to persuade Karlis to leave her for an hour to visit their mother and tell her of Karna's condition and safety. This apprehension had been concerning her all week and causing concern for their mother's health. But after a short time Karlis returned, bringing their mother with her.

The joy of their reunion was greater than either could express.

With tears of relief and thankfulness in her eyes, Hezal embraced her daughter. She gently kissed her forehead and looked into the bruised, abused face with a mixture of joy and terrible sadness.

"Oh my daughter, my child," she murmured, "what has become of you?"

"Hush mother, I am well and safe," Karna comforted, gently taking her mother's hands in her own. "Karlis has taken care of me since the night of the attack and as you see, I am alright."

Hezal shook her head. "We thought that you were dead! No-one had seen you, though we asked far and wide throughout the city. There had been no sight of you and we were terrified that you have been killed.

"Oh my daughter, Tash be praised that you are all right! I have never prayed so fervently for anything in all of my life as I have prayed for your safe deliverance. But what is to become of you? We must pray that your step-father never hears of you again or it shall be worse."

Karna looked down, "Mother he will not care to hear my name spoken again and he will certainly not pursue me. I am dead to him. Do you not remember what he said that night?"

"Yes Karna, I do. But if he even hears your name again he will seek you out to kill you. He feels so greatly dishonoured and I have never seen him angrier."

Karna hung her head as tears stung her eyes. As she did so her arm throbbed once more, carefully bound though it was. She lacked the strength to restrain the shudder that wrenched through her body.

Always alert, Hezal missed nothing and reached out a gentle finger to remove her daughter's hand from her arm. Fearful, Karna watched as her mother touched the wounded limb lightly. Even this gentle pressure of a finger proved painful and she was unable to stop a cry escaping from her lips.

When she dared open her eyes, she saw the paleness of her mother's expression.

"Mother, is there no hope of it mending?" she asked fearfully, already seeing the answer.

"Oh my daughter … dearest Karna we have no money, and such an injury … it would cost more money than we could make in a year to set. A surgeon would never come to us."

Hopelessly, Karna let the tears fall, feeling the last of her hope drain away as they wet her cheeks.

She was utterly helpless, lacking even a body that worked.

* * *

Author's note:

More misery! I do apologise, but this is a bit of a filler chapter before we get more of Peridan. He's going to be playing a much more active role from now on and there are some interesting moments coming up! Some more Hezal coming up as well, her role will be more explained in later chapters.

We'll be seeing Susan probably the chapter after next. I'm currently working out a time frame for the rest of this fic, but I know the main events and have it roughly drafted.

HUGE thanks to my awesome reviewers – narniac, anyabar, meldahlie and Zoey – you guys just made my week! The comments were just so awesome and I was so pleased by how much you're enjoying this dramatic journey with me!

Meldahlie – thank you so much, you never fail to make me smile and your review was so long and entertaining and just brilliant, so major thanks!

Again, thank you so much for reading. I hope this upload schedule makes up for my previous absence! I am going to be (hopefully) say two weeks for the next one … maybe? : D

Please read, review and let me honestly know what you think!

Thanks again,

Breeze


	11. Enduring

Daring to Dream

Chapter Ten

Enduring

In the darkness she turned over, now wide-awake. Slowly, she sat up. With a thin blanket about her shoulders, she sat listening to the sounds of her family. The room was overly hot as it always was, whatever the season, but she had long grown accustomed to it.

To her right her husband snored lightly, his breathing shallow and raspy. She observed his dark form in the gloom and sighed. Though he was blunt and at times cruel, Tarneesh had never failed her as a husband. He had done all that he had thought necessary, providing her with a home, clothes and the same for their children. He was as he had always been, a blunt working man who sought to keep himself and his family alive.

Their sons were just like him and had been raised in the way that was expected in their culture. It was folly to expect love in marriage when betrothals were made for monetary reasons. It was simple, a way of life that Tarneesh understood and lived by.

So, when she regarded her husband, she could not hate him. She saw the shrewd judgement behind his decisions and could understand them fully. He had simply acted as his father had taught him to. As Calormen had taught him to.

It was not her place to judge and she knew it well … but her heart ached within her.

Silently she rose to her feet and moved between the sleeping figures. With a final glance over her shoulder, she moved through to the other room and carefully opened the front door.

Outside the night was dying and soon she would have arisen anyway to start her family's morning meal. But there was still time. In a moment of rare indulgence, she allowed herself to remember.

Carefully, she lowered herself on to the front doorstep of their dwelling and spoke a single word aloud.

"Hezayla." Without thinking, she moved her hand up to touch her hair and sighed at its coarseness. "Silk, my love?" she murmured softly, "it is not silken anymore."

Unbidden, she felt tears come to her eyes and actually let one stain her cheek before wiping it away. She shook her head and let another sigh escape from her lips. "I am not Hezayla anymore…"

Slowly, she began to sing. So softly at first that it was barely a whisper, but in her heart and in mind she heard the words come alive once more as she allowed herself to remember. Its words told of the beginning of the world, of a time when all things had been created and beauty had filled the earth.

It was a song that she had sung to Karna as a baby when she had rocked her in her arms in the stillness of the night. She had sung it on her wedding night when she had walked with Harradin in their garden, wanting to share something that was personal and precious to her, a young and naïve bride. Then she had sung it a final time, holding her baby daughter in her arms just after they had taken her husband away. Before the soldiers had come for her, to take her back to her father's house.

Slowly, the first light of dawn began to steal through the street, and eventually, she reached to dry her cheeks, now soaked with tears. She no longer was Hezayla, a Tarkheena who had been married to a Harradin Tarkhaan. An innocent, fearful child who had learnt to love and adore her husband.

No, Hezayla had died with Harradin to become Hezal, who was the wife of Tarneesh the carver. A woman who was satisfied and content with her lot. But now she had seen Hezayla again, alive and vibrant - in Harradin's daughter. She had tried to prepare her beloved daughter for the life that Tash had deigned for her. But in doing so, she had tried to smother the strength of her daughter's will - only to see it shine forth, all the more potent and strong under suppression.

She knew that there was no hope. But in that moment, Hezal wished and longed for Hezayla to exist once more. If not in herself - then in Karna. That at least one of them might know what it was to pursue a dream and have some hope of actually seeing it happen.

* * *

Marken stirred. Someone was groaning.

In the stillness of the chamber, he turned his head and listened. There it came again. A long, drawn out groan quickly stifled in a pillow.

Slowly, he opened his eyes and started to get up until he caught the sound of a voice. He lay still for several moments before a grin touched his lips. That was Timeon's voice and if he listened to the groaner – yes, that was most certainly Dalken.

Openly smiling now, Marken turned over and buried his head in the pillow to enjoy a few more minutes of rest. But sleep eluded him, and for once he found that he didn't mind in the least.

Instead he lay on his side and listened to the groans as poor Dalken was remonstrated by Timeon. Once, quite clearly, he heard the word "ale" muttered and was unable to stifle his snort.

No longer able to maintain the façade, he rose and saw Timeon glance up, his sharp eyes missing nothing in the dim light of the sleeping chamber. Even the seasoned healer was unable to hide the smirk in his eyes.

"Has Dalken been over zealous in his appreciation of the Calormen ale again?" Marken asked, motioning for Timeon to join him on the balcony, away from the soldier's hearing.

Timeon raised a sardonic eyebrow in response. "Need I dignify that question with an answer?"

He glanced over at a groan from Dalken. Marken smirked and turned to glance at the view.

Far away in the east the sun was beginning to rise in a glory of red and gold. It bathed the entire land in its warm light, illuminating the pale roofs of the buildings in the city. Far to the east it touched the tops of the distant mountains, blue and hazy in the distance. Before the peaks spread a wide land that was green and hilly. It gradually rolled away to touch the base of the mountains.

It did not seem so different to Narnia, and yet …

Timeon cleared his throat.

"You were deep in thought my lord," he observed. "Does something intrigue you about the land of Calormen?"

Marken glanced at the scene again, suddenly finding it disconcerting. "I found myself wondering at its resemblance to Narnia," he eventually confessed. "It seems so similar and yet …"

"So completely different," Timeon finished with a nod. "I feel the same way. It is a magnificent country, rich in its own traditions. Yet for all its beauty, it seems so very different to home."

Marken nodded. "Can you understand why, Timeon?"

The older man shrugged. "I have not the eloquence of your lordship, but as you ask I will attempt to express myself."

The older man paused for a moment as he gathered his thoughts. "There is a formality and mystery in the manner of Calormen that is thought to be impressive. I do not find it so myself. In fact, I find that it leaves me uncomfortable. There is a constant concern about the right way to act and the acceptable thing to say. For example, I cannot imagine laughing for the sheer joy of it. The very notion seems ridiculous in the presence of Master Tirshan, let alone the Grand Vizir. I must confess, my lord; I miss the informality of the Narnian court dreadfully. The only time that I can recall feeling at ease in this country is in the company of our fellow Narnians."

Marken considered what Timeon had said.

"I believe you are right Timeon," he eventually responded. "You have put into words what I have been wondering at throughout our time here. I could never understand why I felt so ill at ease. I found myself dreading the formality of the dinners."

The healer nodded. "I believe we all feel somewhat ill at ease, my lord Marken. I do not think that we can help but feel isolated at times in this land, courteous though its people are."

Marken was about to reply when someone knocked on the door. With a slight unwillingness, he re-entered the chamber and glanced about at his stirring men; some of them were already half dressed. Dalken was drinking heavily from a water pitcher.

"Shall I answer it, my lord?" Timeon enquired. The young lord nodded,

"It will probably be the slave girls with the water. Thank you."

Hurriedly, Marken pulled a shirt over his head and replaced his light trousers with some breeches. He had been startled the first morning when the slave girls had arrived bearing water, only to find half of the Narnian delegation topless and still asleep. One girl had been so disconcerted that she had dropped her pitcher in shock.

Still, he mused with a half-smile, the crack of breaking pottery had certainly awoken Dalken with a start.

However, it was not the slave girls at the door but Peridan, and long awake by the sight of him. Instantly alert, Marken hastily finished the buttoning of his tunic as he moved to join him.

"What is it Peridan?" he asked, seeing the man's expression.

"I need both yourself and Timeon now," he replied, "on an urgent matter that cannot be delayed."

"What is it, my lord?" Timeon asked, quickly approaching.

"I require your skills as a healer urgently, Timeon."

"My skills, but why? Lord Peridan, are you ill?"

"Nay I am well." Peridan's voice was impatient. "There is a girl who is in great need of your healing, Timeon. She has a broken arm and if it is not properly seen to by a physician it will heal wrongly and pain her for the rest of her life."

Without another word, Timeon strode to his bed and drew out his healer's satchel.

Marken forced himself to swallow the thousands of questions that entered his head. He knew better than to question Peridan when he was in such a mood, but that still begged the answer. Who was this girl? Why was she in such need to aid?

These and many other questions whirled through Marken's mind as Peridan led the way. His face etched with worry and concern. He strode ahead of his companions. But there was something else in his expression that seemed odd, a stern resolution in his eyes that seemed out of place.

Unable to restrain himself further, Marken spoke. "Peridan, who is this girl?"

At first his friend did not respond. but eventually he did, never slackening his pace. "Do you remember the Calormene servant girl that we bumped into in the street about a week ago, the one who picked up your dagger?"

Marken nodded in bewilderment.

"I rose early this morning to take a walk in the gardens. But when I re-entered the house I passed the entrance to the servants' quarters and heard a girl crying. I stopped to listen and could discern two voices. I would have passed by but one voice clearly said the name 'Karna' and my curiosity would not be satisfied until I had enquired about the girl. So I approached and asked the girls why they had spoken of Karna. The one who cried is her sister. Eventually she told me that her sister had broken her arm and that it would not heal. So I agreed to help her. We are now going to meet her now."

Marken listened in surprise. "A servant girl? Why Peridan?"

"I don't have time to tell you now, Marken, but I assure you, I will give full justification for my actions after this has been dealt with."

Still wildly curious, Marken forced himself to be content with this reply. They rounded a corner and he noticed the direction they had taken for the first time.

In the duration of their stay at Master Tirshan's house the Narnian delegation had kept to the guest quarters and the impressive public rooms. But Peridan now led them down a side passage that came out somewhere near the kitchens. Marken took in the bareness of the walls. A stark contrast to the luxury of their own chambers.

"Tarlana?" Marken looked ahead and saw Peridan approaching a peasant girl who waited silently in the shadow of a doorway. Small and stout, she was silent and watchful but there was a pain in her expression that he would not soon forget. The reddening of her eyes that gave evidence to recent tears.

Peridan approached her slowly, his voice quieter and kind. "I've brought the physician of our delegation, his name is Timeon and he will see to your sister's healing."

The girl glanced at Timeon and nodded shortly, her eyes downcast as she motioned to the direction they would take.

Peridan agreed. "Yes, we must leave immediately." Hurriedly, he turned to Marken. "I need you to excuse my disappearance from breakfast, please tell Master Tirshan that I was called away on an urgent matter of business."

"But Peridan, how long will you be gone for?"

"I cannot say, but I will return as quickly as I can." Noticing the misgiving in his friend's eye, Peridan looked at him more urgently. "I will explain myself to you properly later, Marken, I give you my word, but please make my excuses."

Marken forced down his doubts and nodded. "Of course," he said, "Be swift."

Peridan nodded and motioned for the girl to lead the way as he disappeared out of the door.

* * *

Every morning that passed that week brought a growing pain to Tarlana. With every new day she had risen with the dawn and gone to fetch the water, a task that had always been Karna's. She had helped her mother with the meals, done the chores that were asked of her and walked to work alone or sometimes with Tamara. But each step had pained her.

All about her she saw memories of her beloved sister. At the market she would pass by Master Lavarin's stall and shudder as remembrances of that night came flooding back. Once she had even seen him standing outside his stall on her way home, talking to another stallholder. Thankfully he had not seen her, but the horror of what had happened still haunted her.

It had been the same on the eighth morning since Karna's departure. As always, Tarlana had left home at the usual time and found herself in step with Tamara. This was a thing that seemed to happen more and more often as the days passed.

When they were young, Tamara had always been Karna's dear friend. But now, as they walked to Master Tirshan's house every morning a bond had grown between the two young women that was a comfort to each. They had loved Karna with the same great love. But did not dare visit her too often for fear that she might be discovered. Instead they talked of her between themselves and took comfort from these conversations.

"Have you seen her?" Tamara asked as they left the market, taking the road that led to the Tarkhaans' and Tarkheenas' homes.

Tarlana nodded. "I managed to visit Karlis after work yesterday and her bruises are fading quickly."

"What of her arm?"

Tarlana shook her head slowly. "There is nothing that can be done."

Tamara closed her eyes in pain. "So she will always have it."

Tarlana nodded weakly, forcing back the tears that once more threatened.

"We can do nothing but let it heal badly. Mother lacks the skill needed and this is no common injury. Even if we had the money to afford a healer, one would never come."

Tarlana shook her head as they came near to Master Tirshan's house. "Karna was wrong, there is no hope. Tamara, nothing can be done. She is simply lost to us all, and if Father ever deigns to visit Karlis and Ahoz then she is finished."

Tamara gently put her hand on Tarlana's shoulder. "We can only pray to Tash (may he be prasied)," she said softly. "May he have compassion upon her and bring healing."

Tarlana shook her head. "Why would Tash, the inexorable, the irresistible show mercy to a girl who has so dishonoured her family, Tamara? Why should he? She dishonoured our father so dreadfully, calling Master Lavarin vile and…"

She closed her eyes as they approached the servants' gate, feeling tears choke her as she stumbled through the doorway. Gently, Tamara put her arms around her and let Tarlana weep.

They stood like this for sometime, until Tarlana eventually found her grief too much too bear.

"Karna," she exclaimed, "why did you do it? Why must you be lost to us now, forever?"

Softly, Tamara brushed Tarlana's hair back from her face and stroked her back. "She is in the hands of Tash," she said soothingly, "he will protect her."

But the next moment a male voice suddenly spoke, making them both jump as they stared in horrified surprise at one of the barbarian lords. He regarded them intently, frightening them both with the closeness of his scrutiny.

"Did I hear you mention Karna?" he demanded, before noticing the girls' obvious fright. He was instantly contrite, softening his voice in apology. "I am sorry," he said, "I just wanted to ask why you were referring to Karna? Is she alright?"

Tarlana looked at the lord and slowly recognised him as the leader of the Narnian delegation. He could only be the man whom Karna had spoken of with such respect and warmth.

"Are you … my lord … are you Lord Peridan?" Normally she would not have dared to speak so openly to one of the nobility, but there was a gentleness to his gaze that encouraged her.

He nodded. "I am. How do you know Karna?"

"She is my sister. Oh my lord, I must apologise for disturbing you with such a noise."

"You did not disturb me," he immediately assured her. "I merely wished to know how she is and I heard you speak of her. Is she now married?"

The affect of this simple enquiry was immediate and before she could restrain herself, Tarlana felt the tears returning. Hurriedly she turned away, hiding her face in her hands.

Tamara interceded. "My lord, she is not married and has brought terrible dishonour upon her family. It would shame Tarlana to speak of it. The very mention of Karna's name is forbidden beneath her father's roof."

Peridan's shock was great. Unable to restrain his tongue, he demanded what Karna had done to bring such dishonour upon their family.

Shocked by the intensity of his questioning, Tamara exchanged a nervous glance with Tarlana. For the second time in a few minutes, Peridan was contrite. He apologised as he remembered Tamara's words - of the dishonour that mere mention of Karna's deeds would bring upon her sister.

Inwardly, he was shaken by the unexpected strength of his reaction.

As an experienced Narnian ambassador, he had spent many years refining the art of diplomacy and had thought himself to have long ago mastered his emotions. So the force of his reaction was as shocking to Peridan as it had been to these two girls. In that moment he had lost the careful control and restraint which he had come to pride himself upon.

Hurriedly, he hid his confusion behind a mask of calm, pushing the disquiet to the back of his mind. He forced himself to focus upon the task at hand.

With a softened voice he tried to ease the girls' alarm. "Is Karna alright?"

For a moment neither girl responded. Eventually, Tarlana lowered her hands from her eyes having regained control.

"She spoke highly of you my lord and because of that I want to trust you. But if I do, have I your word that you will tell none of what I am about to say?"

Peridan regarded the girl solemnly, struck by the dignity with which she spoke. Slowly he nodded. "I give you my word."

Tarlana took a deep breath, not daring to make eyes contact with Tamara as she forced herself to speak.

"My sister greatly dishonoured my father by refusing to marry the man of his choice. It was awful. She spoke rashly, calling Master Lavarin _vile_ to his face and on the night of the betrothal. My father and Master Lavarin became angry, they beat her and she was thrown from the house.

"Somehow, by the good will of Tash (may he be praised!), she found her way to the house of my younger sister and her husband. They have taken her in and she is healing, but her arm is broken, my lord. If it is not properly set, she will be disfigured and unable to work for the rest of her life. We do not know what will become of her. If my father ever wishes to visit my sister and her husband, then he will kill Karna for sure. My mother and I can never see her again or we will risk her life."

Throughout her retelling, Tarlana spoke with that same quiet dignity, her eyes still reddened from the tears that she had so recently shed. But in her grief she had finally found the strength to speak of it without crying. Instead, she held on to her faith in Tash all the more, believing that He would deliver her sister from this dreadful situation. Eventually she added, "Tash will save her if he wills it, my lord, all we can do is pray and hope."

Peridan had listened silently to Tarlana's dialogue. Alternately horrified at the situation and then moved by her grief. The solemnity with which she had spoken struck him deeply. It was the words of a mature woman from the mouth of a girl who could not have been more than sixteen. There was a profound love in those words and yet such an acceptance of the situation. It was the tone of a woman who had seen and experienced much, but intermingled with the wrenching grief of a young girl.

Above all, he found himself wanting to help these girls. He knew that Marken would heavily disapprove. Despite it being against all levels of propriety and tact, Peridan determined to follow his instinct and act against his better judgement. Though he didn't know why, something within him needed to do this. For once in his life, he was going to act upon impulse, according to his heart rather than his head and in that decision he found a strange sense of freedom.

Peridan turned to the girls, feeling somewhat relieved now that he had determined upon a course of action.

"I am decided," he said firmly. Tarlana frowned.

Peridan noticed and quickly explained. "When I first met your sister, Tarlana, I was immediately struck by her brightness for life. There was an enthusiasm about her conversation and actions that reminded me very much of myself when I was young. She questioned me thoroughly about Narnia and seemed enchanted by the very notion of such a land.

"The vitality and joy that she showed in life greatly reminded me of home. I would protect that at any cost. To have found such joy in life in the dusty back streets of Tashbaan is a rare thing indeed, and that is why I wish to help your sister. When I spoke with her, she reminded me of why I first journeyed to Narnia. In her bright imagination I saw the enthusiasm and love of life that had once spurred me on to enter the service of High King Peter, to take that risk and ride to Narnia with my friends.

"I very much wish to help your sister. I would not have that vibrancy destroyed and that is why I am going to offer the services of our physician. He will be able to help your sister,. I just pray that it is not too late to set her arm."

He saw the expected surprise upon the girls' faces and lowered his voice again. "I am quite in earnest," he assured them, "if you will take me to your sister's home, I will go and fetch our physician."

Tarlana stared at the barbarian lord. Had she truly heard him correctly? Astonished, she tried to process the information faster, forcing herself to respond.

"But my lord," she exclaimed, "why would you do this for us?"

Peridan's eyes softened. "I esteem your sister and I would not see her future lost. To see anyone's future ruined is tragic. What sort of a knight would I be if I did not help those who needed it when it was within my power?"

She shook her head. "But my lord, we are commoners …"

"In Narnia, we do not separate commoners from nobility. Please, do I have you permission to do this?"

Dumbly, Tarlana nodded. A gentle smile touched the lord's lips. "Thank you."

Numbly, she watched him stride away.

* * *

Author's note:

Gasp! She's updating, the same week? I know, I don't believe it either, but I was lying in bed and the story was buzzing around my head. Also, a HUGE part of it has been the extraordinarily kind number of reviews. About five new people have reviewed and are enjoying this journey with me – I cannot thank you enough!

So, things are finally starting to happen! I hope you enjoyed this look into Hezal and Peridan's minds. I hope this chapter also answers a few questions I have received about Peridan's reasoning for helping Karna. I know that I have made them an eventual pairing, but I am afraid that is not going to be for a long time! We had a ton of drama and action to get through first! I have introduced the character of Marken to try and give another Narnian perspective upon the unusual nature of Peridan's actions in comparison to how he normally acts.

Also, I received a question about why Peridan said that Aslan only takes the shape of a lion. I was writing it from Peridan's perspective as a man who came to Narnia as a young man who has probably only seen Aslan a few times at the most, I don't think he would have witnessed Aslan taking another shape because he takes the other forms in _Voyage of the Dawn Treader,_ hundreds of year after the golden age.

I know I said Susan and Edmund would be arriving soon … it might be chapter after next, we'll just have to see what happens!

HUGE thanks to anyabar, moonshine19, narniac4aslan, Kilgharrah, Zoey Rain and alivebygrace for your wonderful, encouraging reviews.

I just wanted to give a special mention to Zoey in particular, thanking you so much for being with me from the start, it means a lot that you are still enjoying the story!

Again, please read and review, let me know what you think and thank you SO much for reading!

Breeze.


	12. The Hand of Hope

Daring to Dream

Chapter 11

The Hand of Hope

The further they travelled into Tashbaan, the more Peridan realised how little they had actually seen of this great city. Though she was stout, Tarlana travelled with the focussed urgency of one with a destination. This left little time for Timeon or himself to look about them as they travelled down winding alleys and across broad market squares – one for the fishmongers and another filled with carpentry items.

It was still early enough for the streets to be relatively empty and there was comfort in their anonymity. They were descending a steep flight of stairs to the south of the butchers' quarter, when Peridan noticed the subtle change in architecture from the finely carved homes of the nobility to the more functional walls of poorer dwellings and businesses.

This new region was a maze of dark doorways and narrow, winding passageways as they traversed the dwellings of the workmen and peasants. They passed a line queuing for a well. Peridan saw many questioning looks and whispers being exchanged at the sight of these strangers in this very Calormen part of the city.

Nervously, he asked Tarlana if they were nearly there. She nodded and ushered them towards one of the alleyways. It was barely ten feet wide, with doorways lining the wall. A woman was hanging washing across a line and two girls played a skipping game by a doorway.

Tarlana steered the two lords towards the third doorway on the left and knocked urgently. It was immediately opened by a frightened young woman. Her eyes grew wide at the sight of the strangers.

Immediately, Tarlana hugged the young woman. "It's all right Karlis. This is the Narnian lord of whom Karna spoke. He overheard me speaking and wishes to help."

Her sister still seemed reluctant.

Peridan interceded. "My name is Peridan," he said gently. "I simply wish to help your sister." He gestured to his companion. "This is Timeon, he is our delegation's physician and will be able to help with Karna's injury."

Karlis' eyes widened with understanding and she gave a small nod. She backed slowly away, allowing them admittance.

The dwelling was very dark after the light of the street and their eyes took time to grow used to the gloom. Peridan identified a table, some chairs, a cooking fire and a few rugs on the floor, but it was a simple dwelling in comparison to his own.

The young woman led the way through this first room and into the second. It was even darker in what was certainly the bedroom, with only a small oil lamp giving light. Peridan stooped through the doorway and recognised a human form lying on a pallet. Karlis knelt by this form and touched it was a gentle hand.

"Karna," she whispered. The form stirred. "Karna, I am sorry to wake you, but you have visitors."

The figure made a move to turn over, but it caused an audible moan.

"What do you mean, _visitors_?" she asked wearily. "Is Mother here?"

Peridan caught the gleam of an eye before the figure jerked upright at the sight of the two large forms and cried out as her arm was jolted.

Timeon did not think. He was a healer before all things and quickly moved to the young woman's side.

"Miss?" he enquired gently, "my name is Timeon. I am a friend of Lord Peridan's and I am a healer. Would you allow me to help you?"

Karna stared at the unfamiliar man with disbelief. "A healer?" she repeated.

Timeon nodded. "But sir, we cannot pay for your services, we have no money …"

"I ask for nothing," Timeon replied. "You are injured and my calling is to help those in pain. So I ask again, will you let me help you?"

Unable to speak, she merely nodded.

Timeon returned the nod. "I thank you. Miss Karlis, is it?"

"Mistress," Tarlana interjected.

"Mistress, I apologise. Mistress Karlis, would you please bring me hot water, clean linen and some form of alcohol if possible?"

It was Tarlana who organised herself and her sister, but they both fled to do Timeon's bidding. It was only with their departure that Peridan allowed himself to approach.

"Karna, can you tell me how long ago your arm was broken?" Timeon's voice was very gentle as he spoke.

"Eight nights, sir," she replied weakly.

"And your arm causes you constant pain?"

She nodded.

"I am going to be honest with you, Karna. If I allow your arm to continue healing at the angle it is, you will never have use of it again. We have to break it again cleanly so that I can set it at the proper angle. It will hurt and cause a great deal of pain, but you will have full use of your arm again and it will heal properly. Do you understand?"

The girl nodded, her face set.

"I will use the alcohol to make you lose consciousness; this will help to deaden the pain."

"May I speak to Lord Peridan for a moment, sir?" she asked.

"Of course."

Peridan approached her quietly.

Though the small lamp only cast a weak light, he was shocked by the transformation in this once vibrant young woman. Her right eye bore the fading bruises of a black eye and was still slightly swollen. Another fading yellow bruise adorned her left cheek. Her hair was lank and greasy from lack of washing and her expression was pained and hopeless.

The bright hope and joy in life that he remembered was utterly gone.

"My lord?" she said through cracked lips.

"Yes Karna?" he asked gently.

"I want to thank you. You had no reason to come to this place, I don't know why you did, but we can never repay such kindness."

"I would never ask for payment. In Narnia we believe that every individual, whether they are human or talking beast, has the right to live a full and productive life. What kind of a knight would I be if I did not do everything within my power to help when someone is in need?"

"But my lord, I am not a Narnian."

"You are a young woman in need of help which myself and Timeon could provide. Please rest easy and do not worry, Karna. Lie back and rest."

Though she was still amazed, Karna allowed herself to lean back upon the pillow and accept what was happening. It seemed half a dream to her that she had been once again dreaming of Narnia and now there were two Narrnian lords kneeling by her bed!

Reality reasserted itself quickly as her arm throbbed and she saw Tarlana and Karlis re-enter the room with the required provisions.

The hour that followed was one of the most difficult of Peridan's life.

He had witnessed gory scenes before on the field of battle but those had all been the result of needful action, Karna's seemed so pointless by comparison.

But why did he care so much?

It was a question that Marken had asked him many times. Peridan found himself pondering it as he watched his friend work.

It could not be denied that he was drawn to the innocent hope of this young woman. Her very idealism reminded him greatly of himself at that age … but there was more. She was so without artifice or falsehood, she spoke as she felt and there was a real refreshment in that honesty. Especially in this society where a sense of mystery was considered attractive and refined.

Peridan had always been a plain talking man and he abhorred any lies or flattery, as did every Narnian. It might seem strange, but he decided that he was drawn to her because of how much she reminded him of his beloved homeland. Also for something entirely her own. It was a positive hope in life that fascinated him.

As Peridan was pondering these things, Timeon was giving Karna a large amount of alcohol. It was a relief to see it take effect as she started to lose consciousness and the pain obviously lessened. It was needed in the minutes that followed.

Karlis and Tarlana proved to be patient, capable helpers as they held their sister down and supported Timeon in his work. He worked as quickly as he could to carefully re-break the bone and set it in its proper place.

Karna groaned loudly and flinched away from the pain. She was stopped from causing herself further injury by the loving support of her sisters.

With practised skill, Timeon reset the bone and tightly splintered it to ensure no movement from its new position. He bound it securely with bandages and only allowed himself a smile when Karna was resting comfortably upon the mattress, her arm carefully bound to her side with a sling.

He moved to his healer's satchel and pressed a pouch of dried herbs into Mistress Karlis' hand.

"Four times a day for the pain," he stated. "As long as she does not move it, she should make a complete recovery and have full use of her arm in between six and eight weeks. I will want to see her again in a week or so."

The young woman stared at Timeon as though he was heaven sent.

"Thank you sir," she exclaimed. "Thank you both. We haven't words enough to express our gratitude. Thanks to you, our sister will have a future."

Peridan nodded. "We could ask no more, Mistress Karlis. Now, if I might beg an escort from Miss Tarlana, we must return to our quarters as swiftly as we can. We have many preparations to make."

Karlis bowed them out and with a final look at the unconscious Karna, Peridan led his companion from the dwelling.

* * *

Lord Marken of Narnia was getting very flustered. He had been approached by no less than six different people that morning, enquiring after Queen's Susan's preferences with a growing hysteria that was starting to affect his normally tranquil thoughts. For the tenth time he inwardly cursed Peridan for leaving him in this situation.

He had just managed to banish Master Tirshan's cloyingly obsequious butler to polish the looking glasses for a third time, when he saw the approach of a fussily-dressed woman he recognised as Mistress Abilene, the princess' dressmaker.

Marken forced himself to take several deep breaths before turning to the lady with a pleasant expression.

He bowed. "May I assist you, Mistress Abilene?"

Mistress Abilene made a great show of curtseying low and ducking her head. "I thank you for agreeing to see me, Lord Marken," she stated gravelly. "You do me much honour."

"That is my pleasure," Marken replied through gritted teeth, wishing she would just get to the point. "What can I do for you?"

But the dressmaker seemed oblivious to his urgency and continued in a similar vein. "Has the poet not said that the welcome of a virtuous host is better than the dismissal of a thousand undeserving?"

Marken blinked as he tried to follow her quote. "I thank you," he repeated. "Please tell me how may I serve you?"

"Your barbarian lordship does me much service in accepting the presence of one so unworthy." This speech was following by another bow and he felt his patience wearing thin.

"I apologise for my abruptness, madam, but how may I serve you today? I have many preparations to still make before the queen's arrival."

"It is concerning the barbarian queen's arrival that I have come, my lord," she replied, finally getting the hint. "As you are probably aware, the great Tash, the inexorable, the irresistible, has seen fit to gift me with the patronage of their most noble and honourable highnesses, the Princesses Javenis and Ritaraleen. I have been bidden by their most esteemed personages to speak to you about the barbarian queen's colour preferences. They wish to ensure that her apartments are furnished precisely to her tastes."

Marken nodded. "I see, well from my memory, her majesty favours green and gold. Bright colours suit her dark beauty."

Mistress Abilene bowed once more. "I thank your lordship for your excellent advice. Might I enquire as to which shade of green the queen favours?"

"I believe a fresh, brighter green?" Marken tried. "I have often seen her wear a chartreuse dress. A similar hew to that of sunlight on grass."

The absurdity of his reply struck him as the woman bowed her head graciously. "I thank your lordship for your helpful advice and will return with various fabrics for your inspection."

With a final bow, Mistress Abilene left Marken to the relief of his own company and a renewed rising off ill-feeling towards his absent friend.

 _Fabric colours?_ He had faced hundreds on the field of battle and galloped from giant armies and yet his duty to his country in this foreign land was to discuss _fabric colours_?

Marken paced the room, trying to relieve some of his nervous energy.

For want of something to do, he took a sip from a golden goblet and took a sip of the iced sherbet. He was just contemplating throwing the cup from annoyance when the doors opened and he spun to find his absent companions striding into the room.

Merely concerned with the fulfilment of his duty, Timeon only stayed long enough to give a report before leaving to check on Dalken.

Peridan remained silent throughout the physician's account before turning to his friend with a solemn expression. Marken regarded him in silence for a full minute before realising that his companion was waiting for him to speak first.

Eventually, he gave in. "Well? What have you to say, Peridan?"

His friend sighed. "What do you wish me to speak about first Marken? My actions or the motive behind them?"

"Both!" Marken exclaimed, allowing his anger to propel his words. "Have you any idea of the situation you left me in?"

Peridan started, "I do …"

"No you do not! I had to attempt to explain to Master Tirshan why the head lord of our delegation had suddenly decided to absent himself from proceedings only a few days before our queen's arrival. Have you no idea of the insult this casts upon the preparations? I had no explanation for him and had to assure him that you would be returned for the meeting with Prince Rabadash _and_ the Grand Vizier tonight, with no certainty that you would!

"I have spent hours this morning discussing fabrics and menus and dances and dress codes, with no real understanding of the queen's preferences. What is worse Peridan, I had no conception of why you would risk insulting our hosts for the sake of a single servant girl we know nothing of and have no allegiance to."

Marken's friend stared at him for a long moment. He considered his words for a long time, before forcing himself to speak.

"I _am_ sorry, Marken. I confess that I might have been rash in hurrying away this morning, but I implore you to listen to my motive before you judge me harshly. I overheard Karna's sister crying and speaking of how her sister would face a life with a crippled arm because a broken bone had healed at an awkward angle. Karna would never be able to work again with such an injury and face a life of unspeakable hardship. I took Timeon to help her and cannot regret my actions. We were able to provide aid that saved a young girl's life."

Marken forced himself to agree with the truth of Peridan's words.

"I have no problem with Miss Karna herself, Peridan, she seems a pleasant girl. But I am struggling to understand the motivation behind such a rash action, my friend. You are renowned for your calm head and gift of diplomacy. What about this Calormen girl inspired such loyalty? I do not mean to seem heartless, but I am sure there are a hundred such cases of life's cruelty in this great city."

Peridan nodded. "I cannot deny the truth of your words, Marken. But when we spoke at that first banquet, there was something about Karna that struck me.

"Have we not been witness to every art of flattery and allurement that women kind can create at Cair Paravel, as they attempt to capture Peter and Edmund's notice? Do you not remember how we have laughed at the painted peacocks and their vanity? Do you recall how great a difference we have drawn between the frank honesty of their majesties Queen Lucy and Susan, and the visiting ladies of noble birth?"

His friend nodded.

Peridan sighed. "Would you be surprised if I told you that Karna reminded me of dear Lucy?"

Marken stared. "Truly, Peridan?"

"Indeed. From the moment I met her, I was struck by Karna's joy in life. She had been raised in the same poverty and hardship as the other girls. But there was a vitality, an exuberance to her happiness that stayed with me. She listened with such awe and wonder when I spoke of Narnia that I couldn't help being touched. It was so refreshing to see such frank honesty and curiosity.

"Her sister told me that she was engaged to a blacksmith and as the daughter of a carver this was a fine match for her. Apparently, she tried to be subservient and do what was expected of her. You see, a girl is expected to marry the man her father chooses. But Karna was very unhappy with the match. Her spirit could not submit and against all expectations of decorum, she openly declared her aversion to this man at their engagement ceremony and refused to marry him.

"I couldn't help remembering the stubborn young girl of twelve who once ignored the advice of her older brothers and friend to not ride an unruly stallion, and ended up with a broken arm! Lucy has always allowed her feelings to guide her actions with an innocent passion. I could not help comparing her to Karna. They are so alike."

Marken regarded his friend for a long time. "I understand Peridan. Lucy and Susan are as sisters to me as well. I would have acted similarly. I apologise for speaking so forcefully to you."

Peridan clapped his friend on the shoulder. "No Marken, I must apologise for leaving you in an uncomfortable situation with no clear explanation."

The two knights smiled, glad to have resolved the situation.

Peridan cracked a grin. "Has Master Mardeesh been bothering you incessantly about the silver work?"

Marken groaned, "And the looking glasses! He has returned twice already this morning, seeking my assessment of the polishing. I did explain to him that Queen Susan is very unlikely to notice a finger smudge upon a silver candlestick. The man looked horrified at the idea."

Peridan laughed. "He takes pride in his work, Marken. Hadn't you realised that a Calormen's home in the ultimate display of their wealth and prestige?"

"And how does Queen Susan's preferred shade of green help the diplomatic situation, may I ask?"

"I see Madame Abilene got to you!"

"Not just got to me. The woman took half an hour to stop bowing and quoting poetry at me before getting to the point."

Peridan laughed loudly. "I am sorry Marken. I have more patience for such discussions. I have forgotten she had an appointment this morning."

"Well you can meet with her to discuss the exact shade of chartreuse Susan would prefer for her cushions. I was actually comparing shades of green and quoting verse like some poet! I have never had a more absurd conversation!"

Even Marken was forced to laugh as he retold the conversation to Peridan and they both left the chamber for the midday meal feeling far more relaxed.

* * *

Author's note:

I am SORRY! I know it's been over month and although I have a proper excuse that is still a long time for an update. Two weeks of flu, exam marking and report deadlines are my excuse, judge me as you please! I actually starting writing this the next week as an escape from marking, but ask any teacher and they will tell you that untouched marking just grows until you can't escape from it to write (no matter how much you want to!)

I am sorry this is shorter than normal but I was desperate to update.

But there is a light at the end of the tunnel (Hurray!). I break up on 16th and am planning to update before and after Christmas.

I hope you enjoyed this look into Peridan's thoughts and justification for helping Karna. I am thinking of Marken as his voice of common sense in this chapter, because he did rather leave the poor man in the lurch!

I did some research about medieval bone re-setting and apparently, there used to be professional "bone re-setters" who did it for a job. I considered doing a detailed explanation of the operation but found that the chapter focussed more upon Peridan's thoughts because I thought it was important to explain what's going on in his mind to justify his actions. I know it's going to be an eventual Peridan/OC but I want to make the development of feelings realistic and gradual.

Next chapter will see Susan's arrival, Edmund, Corin, Rabadash and lots more! Let's just say things are going to start happening!

I want to sincerely thank every person who has reviewed this story so far. Your reviews mean the WORLD to me, especially those kind people who have reviewed from way at the beginning.

So, many thanks to anyabar1987, narniac4aslan, Kilgharrah, ninita the witch, Rosazul66, meldahlie and Zoey Rain. The fact you reviewed so quickly means the world to me and just motivates me to write. I have felt so guilty about not updating sooner, I promise the next will be up in a MUCH shorter time!

Thank you so much for reading and please let me know what you think!

Thanks again,

Breeze.


	13. The Arrival of a Queen

Daring to Dream

Chapter Twelve

The Arrival of a Queen

From the moment his father had come striding into to one of old Dusty's lectures on the history of Archenland and him that he was to journey with the Narnian delegation to Calormen, Prince Corin had been very excited. What had followed were two hurried weeks of preparation before the party left Narnia at dawn on the Splendour Hyaline.

So far, the journey had not failed to fulfil Corin's expectations. It seemed that every passing day brought new and exciting experiences.

There were hours of freedom spent exploring the ship's cabins and even the enormously high rigging (though First Mate Ralph made him promise not to tell). Half hours were spent learning the rules of seamanship with King Edmund. There would be lessons in history when kind Mr Tumnus would retell stories of great battles and adventures (far surpassing Old Dusty's plodding speeches). And every evening saw an hour spent with Queen Susan playing board games and in the telling of stories.

Though he had met the queen several times before this journey, it was only during these evenings that Corin grew to look upon the young woman as an aunt. Rather than dismissing his imaginings and thoughts, she would listen and speak to him as an adult. It was one of the first times in his life when an older lady (who was not his old nurse) would listen and discuss his concerns.

They had even spoken about Mother, though briefly, and he had delighted to hear about her kindness and merry heart. Queen Susan had known the late Queen Embeth in her girlhood and had heard her speak of her joy in her young son when he was only a toddler. They had even mentioned Cor – the brother he had never known.

"I can never speak of Mother or Cor to Father," Corin had confided. "He always grows so sad and grave at the mention of either. But it has been a relief to finally speak of it. Thank you, my lady, truly."

Queen Susan's simple response had been to squeeze his hand and suggest a game of cards.

That was one of the things Corin liked about the queen. Whenever things got heavy and he might embarrass himself, she never pried or tried to get him to talk, but distracted him with a game or puzzle.

So the days passed in a happy blur for Corin. But even he grew curious as they drew nearer to their destination and the land on the shore changed from thick woodland to the rolling hills on the downs.

His curiosity got the better of him one day when he was sitting with Mr Tumnus and the queen in the stern sitting room.

"What is Calormen like, Mr Tumnus? Have you been there many times?"

The old faun closed the book he was reading and smiled at Corin.

"Which question would you like me to answer first, young prince?" he asked, carefully folding his spectacles.

Corin pondered for a moment. "What is it like?"

"Well. Calormen is very like Narnia and your father's land of Archenland and yet utterly different. It has similar land marks. The Western Mountains tower to the very sky so that the snow never melts from their great heights – similar to that of Mount Pire on Archenland's southernmost border. There are rolling hills to the east of Tashbaan that are like the steppes in the south west of your father's land. But it is also a very different country.

"Theirs is a land of vast desert with sand spreading out as far as the eye can see. The great city of Tashbaan is also very different to your father's castle of Anvard. Where Archenland is filled with villages and small towns, Tashbaan is a vast city, situated all around the sides of a great hill. Thousands live within its walls and make their home in its dusty streets."

Corin's mouth was wide. "How many live there? Father told me that we have around four hundred living in Anvard."

Tumnus smiled gently. "Well multiply that number by at least five hundred and you might have an approximation for the population of Tashbaan."

The prince's eyes were wide. "200,000?" he gaped. "Surely that number cannot live in all the world!"

The faun laughed and patted Corin's shoulder. "I see my prince is quick with his numbers."

The boy smiled. "I love arithmetic, but Old Dusty … I mean … my tutor tells me I should focus more upon the study of politics and diplomacy. I can't wait until Father will allow me to train full time with the knights."

Queen Susan, who had been listening the whole time, now chose to speak.

"Do not forget that a king must have the skill of wisdom as well as talent with a sword, Corin," she stated.

The prince nodded. "Yes your majesty, I understand. But I do wish there was _more_ swordplay and slightly less politics."

The queen laughed. "You remind me of the high king Peter. He too found diplomacy a most dull topic of study. He has ever thanked Aslan that our brother has a greater gift for it than he. It is always his excuse for leaving trade negotiations early. Lucy has often believed that he has asked Oreius to invent some invasion or skirmish to escape from the negotiation table!"

They all laughed at this image of the noble High King, of whom Corin was much in awe.

"Now Susan, we all have out gifts and talents," Tumnus interjected diplomatically. "Just as yourself and Lucy are as different as night and day."

"It is true!" the queen exclaimed. "I am often amazed at the difference between us."

Tumnus had just opened his mouth to speak when they all heard the clear call of the look out,

"Stormcrest Point off the starboard bow!"

In a moment, the comfortable atmosphere of the cabin was lost as their destination grew suddenly much closer.

"Isn't Stormcrest Point a day's sailing from Tashbaan's port?" Corin queried, moving to stare out of a porthole.

The faun nodded. "Indeed, my prince. Only a day left before we reach Tashbaan."

Corin glanced up to see Tumnus regard the queen with an unusual gravity. Queen Susan laughed at the faun's gaze and moved over to kiss his wrinkled cheek.

"Dear Tumnus, don't appear so severe. You look as though we are heading into dangerous waters."

Though Tumnus' expression softened at the queen's laughter, his tone was still solemn when he replied. "That, my dear queen, remains to be seen."

* * *

Through all his years of experience as a diplomat, even Peridan would admit a growing monotony in the endless ceremony of life in Tashbaan. He was just dressing in his green tunic for yet another dinner, (one of only two ceremonial tunics he had bought with him which he was sure was being remarked upon by the gossips of the Tashbaan nobility) when there was a swift rapping on his door.

"Enter," he barked while trying to do up his new belt. The leather was proving resistant.

Marken strode in, similarly dressed for dinner. "I have just had word that the Splendour Hyaline was sighted off Stormcrest Point."

Peridan grinned, "They will arrive in less than a day?"

"Prince Rabadash's scout is predicting mid-afternoon tomorrow."

"Then, by the mane, thank goodness I insisted upon confirming the menus today rather than tomorrow."

Marken snorted. "I really doubt that her majesty would have cared Peridan."

His friend smiled. "No, but Master Tirshan would have, and probably taken it out upon his staff if everything had not been perfect for the time of her arrival."

"With that in mind, we still have a dinner to attend."

Peridan rolled his eyes. "Hopefully the last where we will be the chief attraction."

Marken laughed. "What? You mean you haven't enjoyed being the centre of attention for the past three weeks, Peridan?"

"I think you know the answer to that."

In the end, the evening's meal proved to be one of the quickest of their visit, as most of the party were distracted by last minute preparations for the Narnian queen's visit.

Peridan found that he was actually able to finish his main course before a simpering Tarkheena Lasaraleen was bowing before him. He rose politely and returned the gesture.

"My lady Tarkheena, I trust you are well this evening?"

"I thank you, my lord Peridan, I am very well." The young woman bowed her head once more, causing her large gold earring to jangle. "We were thrilled to hear about the sighting if the barbarian's queen's ship. I understand that she will be arriving by tomorrow afternoon?"

"Yes, with her brother, King Edmund the Just."

"But the High King is not to accompany them?"

"No, High King Peter was to have originally been of the party, but our northern border was attacked the giants of the north and King Peter had to respond immediately before lived were endangered."

"How frightful! I do so worry about the safety of my own dear husband. The Tiscroc (may he live forever) has deigned that he remains on patrol for the next month. There is real fear of an attack by those dreadful barbarians in the land of Ulvar. Do you know the terrible land beneath our southern border?"

"I have heard of it, but never visited."

"Oh, neither have I or wanted to. It's a dreadful place by all accounts. It was thoroughly routed by our great Tiscroc seventeen years ago and their awful ruler was killed, but it remains important to always be vigilant."

"Indeed madam." Peridan nodded and was trying to find a way to extricate himself politely from this conversation, when he became aware of a Tarkheena standing behind Lasaraleen.

She was a tall woman and much older, beautifully dressed, but without the usual flair of the younger Tarkheenas. It took Lasaraleen a moment to notice the other woman, before she flushed slightly, hastily gesturing to her companion.

"My lord Peridan, you must forgive me. I came over to introduce my friend to you and quite forget my purpose! We are all just so thrilled by the queen's imminent arrival."

"There is nothing to forgive my lady, Tarkheena. Please introduce me to your friend."

"My Lord Peridan, in the name of Tash, the inexorable, the irresistible, may I present Tarkheena Menelay of Tashbaan, wife of Tarkhaan Abramman, chief counsel to the Tisroc (may he live forever)."

Peridan bowed to the older Tarkheena and was at once struck by the directness of her stare. It was honest and straight, without the coquetry of every other Calormen noblewoman he had met.

"My lady Tarkheena Menelay," he replied, kissing her hand. "It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance."

"As it is mine, my lord Peridan," the Tarkheena replied. "I apologise for not meeting you sooner, but my eldest daughter has recently given birth to my first grandchild and I wished to meet him."

"I congratulate you, my lady. A grandson, I take it?"

The older woman beamed. "Yes, my lord. A strong boy, in excellent health."

"And how is dear Anaraleen?" Lasaraleen bludgeoned in.

"She is well, I thank you, Tarkheena Lasaraleen. Exhausted but recovering from her labour."

The younger Tarkheena gave an ear-grating giggle. "I suppose she is not looking to give the young lord a sibling any time soon?"

"Not for at least a season, I should think, my dear."

Peridan watched the older woman with a growing respect as she introduced the younger woman into a nearby conversation and expertly removed herself.

She returned to Peridan with a wry smile. "I apologise for my companion but she is as she is, the product of her upbringing. Very like her mother."

Peridan smiled. "It has been my observation that the younger Tarkheenas believe a certain pitch of giggle to be particularly becoming."

Tarkheena Menelay allowed herself a low chuckle. "I am afraid it is so, my lord Peridan. They are brought up to charm and please their husbands. It is very rare for a Calormen noblewoman to take an interest in politics, or to seek to aid their husband in a more profound way than beyond the running of his home and the throwing of parties. Lady Lasaraleen and her ilk will purely see Queen Susan as a rival for Prince Rabadash's affections. They will not see the political gains behind the match."

"You are very blunt, my Lady Menelay."

She smiled back. "I speak as I find, my lord."

It was instantly clear to Peridan that Lady Menelay was a very skilled courtier. She had the ability to please everyone, but also the ability to recognise a person's true intentions.

What followed was a frank discussion of Narnia and Calormen's trades and the likelihood of there being a match made between Prince Rabadash and Queen Susan.

"My daughter is a friend of Princess Ritaraleen and she has spoken of the prince's clear regard. He is apparently quite smitten with your queen."

"I do not know the depth of her majesty's feelings," Peridan admitted. "But she was serious in her consideration of the the prince's suit when I left."

"She is fortunate to have the freedom to make such a decision, it is unheard of in Calormen. A young woman's husband is always chosen for her here."

Peridan nodded. "I have heard of your country's traditions. Queen Susan has not mother or father, so it makes sense for her to be able to make her own decision."

Lady Menelay smiled. "If such were the case in Calormen, she would be under the protection of her brother and would marry the man of his choosing. It is what is socially expected."

"How long have you been married, my lady?"

"Many years, my lord Peridan. Twenty next summer. What of you? Have you a wife waiting for you in Narnia?"

He shook his head. "I have not. We do not arrange marriages for monetary gain in Narnia. If I were to meet such a young woman, I would certainly visit her father to ask for his permission for her hand, but it is less of a business transaction in my country."

The Tarkheena nodded. "Then you are fortunate, my lord. I hope your Queen Susan knows how fortunate she is herself to live with such freedom."

Tarkheena Menelay then bowed graciously to him, leaving Peridan feeling both confused and thoroughly intrigued.

* * *

Though she had been walking to work with Tamara for over a fortnight now, Tarlana could not help laughing at the other girl's enthusiasm as she all but bounced to work that day.

"She's coming, she's coming, she _finally_ coming!" Tamara exclaimed as they rounded a corner and met Lamarla outside her door.

They had received word the previous day from Kediza that the barbarian queen's ship had been sighted. This had instantly reignited the speculation and curiosity about the queen's appearance and whether her beauty would be as great as was foretold.

"I've heard that her hair is as dark as night," Tamara said.

"But we all have hair as dark as night," Tarlana responded, "why should hers be so remarkable?"

"Because she has eyes the colour of grass and skin as pale as freshly churned cream," Tamara replied.

Lamarla laughed. "We've already had this conversation! No-one can have skin of such a hue. She must go out in the sunlight _sometimes_! None of the Narnian lords in the first delegation had such pale skin."

"But the barbarian queen is a _woman_!"

The conversation continued in this vein all the way to Master Tirshan's house. It was only once they were within the changing room that they were brought back to reality by a loud call from Kediza.

"Silence!" she called. "I know that there has been much hearsay about the barbarian queen's arrival and I can confirm that Master Tirshan has received confirmation from the great Prince Rabadash that her ship will be arriving by no later than this afternoon. So we have a very busy day ahead of us and will be required to clean this house from top to bottom. I myself will be overseeing the cleaning of the queen's personal apartments. You must go beyond your usual level of diligence and ensure that every room is perfectly presented. Failure to do so will result in immediate dismissal from Master Tirshan's employ. Do you all understand?"

The crowd of girls nodded and swiftly set about their prescribed tasks. Tarlana was pleased to be grouped with Tamara and Lamarla, meaning that their previous conversation could continue as they polished the walls and floor of one of the bathing rooms.

"Do you think we might actually see her?" Lamarla asked.

"I doubt it," Tarlana responded. "She'll be spending the majority of her time at the Tisroc's palace, (may he live forever)."

"But surely she'll need to come back to sleep?" Tamara suggested hopefully.

"I suppose so," Tarlana agreed.

"What of the Narnian men?" a girl called Tarleen added. "Do you think the visiting king will be handsome?"

"If the other men are anything to go by …" her friend added with a giggle. "Did you hear about what happened to poor Kezara?"

"No."

"She took them their water for their washing one morning and the door was answered by a shirtless man!"

The girl all exploded into scandalised giggles.

"Oh poor Kezara!"

"What did she do?"

"Fled for her life apparently," Tarleen's friend continued.

"Well I am sure Prince Rabadash would never act in such a way," Tarlana stated. But then, the memory of Lord Peridan's actions returned to her and she felt guilty for speaking in such a way of his kin.

"Whatever they did, I am sure it was an accident," she added, focussing entirely upon a dirty corner and giving vent to her feelings as she scrubbed.

The truth was, she had pondered the Narnian lord's actions for over a week now and was still no closer to understanding them than her mother or sisters. Besides an obvious regard for Karna, there seemed no other explanation as to why he would have acted in such a way. No Tarkhaan ever would.

But _why_ did he have such a regard for her sister? She was one servant girl that he must have come across among hundreds. Yet, he had not only saved her sister's arm, but also firmly stated that they owed him no payment or even thanks. It simply made no sense to her.

She was so engrossed by her thoughts that the rest of the morning passed in a blur for her and then, before she knew it, they were being shooed out of the main rooms of the house because the queen was due to arrive.

For the time being, she pushed all thoughts of Lord Peridan aside as they waited for the queen's arrival.

* * *

From the moment Stormcrest Point had been sighted, Lord Edmund of Narnia had been troubled. Up until this moment, it had been easy to pretend that they were simply on a voyage of pleasure. But with the sighting of that point had come a swift return to reality and the truth of his dear sister actually considering the hand of a spoilt, vain prince.

It had been a wonder to himself and his other siblings from the start that Susan would even consider marrying such a man as Rabadash of Calormen.

Since the last summer when the Prince had visited them at Cair Paravel on a visit of state, Edmund had been struck by his extreme arrogance. But with his true nature hidden under a veil of brittle charm, he had seen his elder sister taken in and flattered by the foreign prince. Even now she was cheerfully anticipating their arrival, dressing herself for the occasion and seeming to look forward to her reunion with Rabadash.

He was startled from his thoughts by a croaky voice, "You seem troubled, sire?"

Edmund turned to greet Sallowpad the raven with a solemn nod. "I am Sallowpad and I believe you can understand the turn of my thoughts?"

The raven nodded. "Indeed, my lord king. But I believe that we all trust the judgement of our lady queen?"

"Indeed we do."

"Then we must trust my lady, Queen Susan to make up her own mind about Prince Rabadash and trust that she will have his true nature revealed to her. My lord, if I might be so bold? Why do we not ask Aslan for guidance and trust her to his paws?"

The king smiled. "As always Sallowpad, you are the voice of reason. I wish I had more of your wisdom and half of Queen Lucy's faith. She is always a voice of guidance upon such matters and said very similar words to me before our departure."

"Then might I humbly suggest that we both follow the queen's advice, my lord king? We know that Aslan guides the lives of all Narnians and we can be certain that he will guide the Queen Susan in this most important decision."

Edmund felt himself smiling for the first time in a day. "I thank you for your wise words my friend, I will trust in Aslan. Now I should probably follow my sister's example and change for this great arrival. Knowing Prince Rabadash it is sure to be as long and ceremonious as he can manage."

The raven cackled. "Then feel pity for the Lord Peridan, lord king. He has had to put up with their ways for three weeks already!"

The young king laughed. "I do, my friend. I daresay even Peridan will have been driven to distraction by their mysterious ways by now!"

When they did eventually dock, Edmund was washed and deemed suitably "kingly" by even Susan's exacting standards. He had donned a pale blue tunic and even wore his crown, (at Tumnus' suggestion). Susan herself was stunning in a gown of spring green with her tiara placed in her long black hair, her throat bearing only a single emerald upon a simple silver chain. She looked beautiful and held her head proudly as the ship drew alongside the dock.

It was a relief to Edmund when the first face he saw was Peridan's. Smiling widely, his friend strode up the gangplank and they shared a warrior's embrace, clasping arms and slapping each other upon the back.

He bowed low to Susan and kissed her hand, but received a scolding embrace and kiss from the queen.

"How can you greet me with such formality, Peridan?"

"I am merely trying to live up to the expectations of our hosts, my lady queen," he replied. "If I have learnt one thing these past few weeks it is that the Calormen people love their ceremony and poetry."

He bowed once more. "May I have the honour of escorting you to his highness, the prince? There is a litter prepared and he is waiting to greet you in all his pomp and circumstance at his father's palace. He has sent the Grand Vizir to greet and escort you through Tashbaan."

Susan was surprised. "He has not come to escort me, himself?"

Peridan shook his head. "I regret not. He wished you to see him in all of his riches and splendour."

A little taken aback, Susan nodded and recovered her smile. "Very well, let us greet the Grand Vizir."

"Prepare for the pontification," Peridan murmured. The queen smiled slightly ruefully.

Grand Vizir Ahosta was expectedly long-winded and obsequious as he bowed before Queen Susan and King Edmund. He bowed so low that his nose touched the floor once and Edmund found himself wondering whether the carpet had been especially laid with this is mind.

After a tediously drawn out speech about the graciousness of Tash (the inexorable, the irresistible) and the greatness of the Tisroc (may he live forever!), the queen was finally able to enter the luxurious litter and Edmund to mount the horse provided for him.

They passed through crowded, curious streets on their way to the Tisroc's palace and as they moved, Edmund found himself remembering the two other occasions when they had visited this impressive city. It was so different to their own beloved Cair Paravel. The sheer number of inhabitants seemed overwhelming as he glanced down at the staring eyes of the common folk, watching the arrival of the barbarian lords.

Eventually, they wound their way up the grand colonnade and arrived outside the Tisroc's intimidating palace. Great marble pillars soared above to meet the huge roof of the building. They dismounted and were then led into the huge antechamber before the main throne room.

Here stood Prince Rabadash, gloriously clothed in blue and gold, a jewelled turban upon his head and a proud smirk upon his lips. He approached the queen with an arrogant swagger, bowing deeply to her before he kissed her hand.

"My lady queen," he drawled, "Allow me to welcome you to our great city. I cannot tell you what a pleasure it is to welcome you to my home at last. It has been far too long an absence and I have missed the radiance of your presence."

Susan curtseyed deeply and rose with a smile, thanking the prince with her usual graciousness. "It is indeed a pleasure to return to your great city, my lord prince," she replied. "We were honoured by your invitation."

The prince returned her smile, "Might I have the honour of escorting you into the royal presence?"

The queen nodded her acquiescence and allowed herself to be escorted through the vast oaks doors. With a slight dread, Edmund fell into step behind them, knowing that there was now no turning back.

* * *

Author's note:

Early Christmas present! I promised to update sooner and I hope this was worth the month's wait! I won't be able to update before Christmas again but my plan is to before the new year so (fingers crossed!) it might be once a week before I have to return to work in January.

Anyway, they have arrived! I hope you enjoyed this viewing of Susan's arrival from four different perspectives. I've had to do a lot of re-reading of HHB for this chapter because of wanting to be accurate. They are apparently in Tashbaan for three weeks, so we have a lot to get through before they leave again.

This was my first Karna-less chapter in the whole story, don't worry, she will be back in the next chapter and the character of Menelay is going to become a very strategic one (wonder if anyone can make an educated guess?) I did leave a clue in the chapter!

Words cannot express my gratitude for the continued reviews and kindness of people. To hear that an update made someone's day just made my week (thanks Zoey!). Your reviews just motivate me to update sooner and sooner.

Thanks so much for reading, I hope this chapter met expectations.

Many thanks to Guest, Mel, Kilgharrah, Rosazul, Anyabar and Zoey Rain for reviewing, you guys are amazing and HAPPY CHRISTMAS!

I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday,

Thanks so much,

Breeze.


	14. Home

Daring to Dream

Chapter Thirteen

Home

Timeon made a slow assessment of the arm and eventually gave a nod of approval.

"Healing well," he stated. "We caught the break in time and I'm pleased with the progress of the healing. How does it feel, Miss Karna?"

"Comfortable enough, as long as it isn't jogged," she replied.

Karna smiled slightly at the older man. Compared to the other Narnians she had met, Timeon was older and more thoughtful. He was also something of a mystery.

Where Peridan and Marken were open, there was something almost guarded about the healer.

"The herbs truly help with the pain, sir. Thank you."

"No need to thank me miss, it's my calling," came the gruff reply.

She nodded. "Well I thank you nonetheless. We could never have afforded the physician's bill."

Timeon inclined his head by way of reply. He was a man of few words and often struggled with women, least of all a young one. But there was something so earnest in this young woman's inquiries that he couldn't help listening.

"Where did you learn your arts, sir?"

"I wouldn't call them arts, miss. There is no magic in what I do. I was trained by my uncle."

"From where do you hail? Are you of Narnia?"

Her dream was fresh in her mind.

"Nay. I was born on Galma."

"Galma? Where is that?"

"It is an island far to the east."

"An island? By Tash, do you mean surrounded by water? My mother spoke of such things in my girlhood."

"Indeed, miss. It has water on every side. Picturesque I suppose it might be called. Very different to Calormen, though."

"It must be. I have only ever seen the sea from a distance. On a high cliff overlooking the Eastern Sea and the Bight of Calormen."

"Well Galma is three days' sailing to the east."

The girl's curiosity was voracious and somehow, she had drawn him in.

But Timeon saw a sudden change come over her. She leant back and became almost _shy_.

"Do … do … do they worship the lion on Galma, sir?"

He watched her face carefully. Her peculiar question caught him completely off guard. _Where had this inquiry come from?_

"We do, miss," he replied slowly. "Aslan, the great lion, is worshipped by all who live north of the Winding Arrow River."

She nodded.

Try though he might, he could not help pressing her. "Why do you ask?"

Karna flushed and looked down. The edge of the blanket was pulled to almost a tourniquet around her fidgeting fingers.

"I … I was just curious when Lord Peridan mentioned him. He seems very different to Tash."

"Aye, that he is. As different as night from day."

"Have you ever seen him?"

The older man paused. A long moment passed before he spoke. "Just once, from a distance. He came to Cair Paravel on the day of Queen Lucy's eighteenth birthday and I saw him. None who were there that day can forget it."

Karna's mouth dropped open. Karlis gasped.

"You actually _saw_ a deity!" Karna exclaimed. "What was he like?" She felt her heart give an odd flutter.

For the first time in their short acquaintance, Timeon smiled deeply.

"Wonderful," he said. "Powerful, strong, beautiful, magnificent – everything you could dream of or ask for."

His expression was hard to describe at that moment – peaceful and happy, but it ran deeper – to a contentment that seemed to capture his very soul.

Karna felt it again, that odd fluttering of her heart. A yearning deep within herself.

In that moment she knew that she longed to share that feeling, to experience the same bliss. She was about to ask something else, when a loud hammering came upon the door.

They all jumped.

Karna felt a spike of pain streak up her arm at the sudden jerk. Karlis gave a small scream. Timeon sprang to his feet with a hand on his blade.

"Who could it be?" whispered Karna.

Karlis shook her head. "I don't know."

Though her hands still shook, Karlis forced herself to rise and moved into the other room. She firmly closed the door to the bedroom, trying to still the swift beating of her heart. _What was wrong with her? It could be anyone!_

Unable to stand the tension, she opened the door quickly.

Tarlana stood there.

Karlis smiled from relief. She moved forward to embrace her, but Tarlana's expression made her pause.

Something was wrong.

"Come in, my sister," she said, moving aside.

Tarlana walked into the room as though in a daze. She turned to stare at Karlis and her expression could only be described as haunted. Swiftly, her younger sister urged her into a chair and started some water heating for tea. She also opened the door, assuring the others that it was only Tarlana.

Karna was so alarmed by the sight of her sister that she made to rise. Timeon gave a helping hand and soon had her installed in the other chair.

Tarlana jerked back to reality at the sight of her eldest sister.

"It's Mother…" Her voice shook. "She's been coughing a great deal this past week and I was worried, but she told me not to fuss. Then I found her collapsed on the floor this morning. Even Father looked worried and told me to take the day off work to tend to her. I've spoken to Maralis and she offered me some herbs that she uses when the children have a fever, but they don't seem to be working."

Karna took Tarlana's hand in her own and Karlis brought her a cup of tea. Both were wordless with horror.

"What are her symptoms?" Timeon's reaction was immediate. He knelt by the young woman. "What ailments is she suffering?"

Tarlana took a shaky sip of tea. "Fever, night sweats and a dreadful hacking cough, sir."

Karlis and Karna gasped. They knew these symptoms. Every Calormene citizen knew the signs of the most dreaded disease. Timeon voiced their terror.

"Consumption most likely. By the mane, if only I could see her …"

Karlis gasped. "Sir you can't, you know you can't. Karna's anonymity is only protected here because it is far enough from our Father's residence. If you were seen entering that house, then word would most certainly reach him."

"What do I care of that?" Karna exclaimed, "Mother is very ill and here is a good man who is not only willing but urgent to help her. You must take him Tarlana."

Tarlana stared at her eldest sister, hope and fear chasing each other across her face.

Karlis remained adamant. "It must not be attempted Karna, if you are discovered there is nowhere you can go. You know our father will hunt until he finds you. It is only because he thinks you dead that he has not done more."

"What does that matter in the face of our mother facing death?"

Timeon finally spoke. "If I might interject. I believe that no decision should be made rashly. There is a great deal to consider and before a course is chosen, I wish to speak to Lord Peridan. We need to discuss every choice and its consequences. Karna I do understand your urgency, but your sister is right. No decision can be reached until we have given this some serious and careful thought. The risks on either side are great."

He rose with a sudden weariness and drew a small bag from his healer's satchel. "In the meantime, Miss Tarlana, take these herbs and give them to your mother in an infusion of weak tea every other hour."

Tarlana rose and took the bag gratefully.

Timeon followed her to the door.

"I have already lingered longer than is wise," he stated. "I will return tomorrow evening after a conversation with Lord Peridan. Until then, do nothing."

He held Karna's gaze for a long moment. "Regardless of what your heart is telling you to do, heed my words. Do nothing. Rash action is the greatest danger at this time."

Karna returned his stare with a reluctant nod. She knew his wisdom was true, but her impulsive nature balked at the inaction.

The healer rested a hand on her shoulder for a single moment before nodding to Karlis. "Have patience and trust that all will be well."

Tarlana and he left together, disappearing into the bustling streets.

* * *

Peridan had always loved the dawn. Rising with the birds had been a habit since he was a child, and growing to manhood had not altered his routine.

It was that half hour, just before the sun properly rose. When the darkness was fading, giving way to the first pale light of a new day. A fresh chance to undo mistakes and make the most of a new opportunity.

Dawn was slightly different in Calormen, but the feeling was the same.

Fewer birds sung, but the freshness of the air had a greater significance. It gave a respite from the unrelenting heat of the climate. The same stars waned in that half hour as the sun's brightness banished their presence for another day.

At home he would always spend the dawn walking through the woods, or along the beach that lay below Cair Paravel. It was often during these times that he would walk with his great friend Sallowpad, discussing issues of court or questions of diplomacy. In their many years of friendship, the talking bird had become a true confidante for the knight.

They had continued this habit after the royal party's arrival and though not home, had found the house's garden to serve just as well for their dawn walks.

It was the sixth day when Peridan entered the garden again, slightly later than their usual hour of meeting. Sallowpad was perched upon the wall, overlooking the city as he often did.

"Sixth morning, my friend," he croaked before Peridan was half way across the garden.

The lord laughed. "Indeed. I apologise for my lateness; I seem to have developed a taste for the Calormen people's excellent plum wine."

"I shall have to take your words for it," Sallowpad replied with a ruffle of his feathers. "I have been pondering a mystery this morning, Peridan."

"What mystery, my friend?"

"What we are still doing in this alien city. Do you think our fair queen is blinded to the arrogance of this prince? Does she not see the brittleness of his charm?"

Peridan sighed. "I do not know, Sallowpad. Susan seems delighted with all that she beholds. But it is a wonder to me that she could ever imagine herself happy living among such vanity. I cannot help feeling that every Tarkheena who approaches her in the name of friendship is seeking intimacy in order to find a fault that may be used against her. Her majesty is so trusting that I am afraid she will be taken in and grievously hurt."

"Have you spoken to her highness of this?"

"Not candidly. I dare not. She must come to her own conclusions about Prince Rabadash."

"What does the king say?"

"We are of the same opinion. King Edmund also wonders at her majesty's choice. But he is loath to influence her, he wishes Queen Susan to make her own decision. Freedom of choice is what our dear country is built upon. I have seen the consequences of forced marriage first hand in this land and would not force any creature to marry against their will."

"Do you speak of the servant girl you met?"

"I do. If she had been given the freedom to choose her husband, she would not have been forced to reject him so publicly and suffered as she has."

"But Peridan, you must remember that every culture is different and has varying traditions."

"I have certainly seen enough of this world to know it, Sallowpad. But though I might have to show respect for differing traditions, it does not mean I have to agree with them."

The raven nodded, though he still appeared troubled. "I suppose all we can do is trust the queen's judgement and aid her as well as we can."

Peridan agreed. "As we will always do. It must be the queen's decision. Come, let us speak of other things."

They spent a lighter half hour discussing the various characters and absurdities they had met over the six days of their visit, when they were joined by a red dwarf. Peridan inclined his head.

"Good morning Droggin, how may we be of service?"

The dwarf gave a small bow and fingered his beard. "Good morrow my lord, Master raven. If it please you, Mr Tumnus bade me come and fetch you both. He wishes to have a meeting before our departure for the Tisroc's palace."

Peridan nodded. "Then please lead the way, we will not have long before it is time to depart."

After a quick discussion concerning arrangements for the day, Peridan found himself following behind the king and queen as they left for yet another entertainment.

It seemed that the prince was determined to show off to the queen in every possible way. After exhibiting his skills as a rider in a jousting tournament over the first three days, there had then been an expansive tour of the city and endless dances held every night in the Tisroc's palace.

Today's excursion was to be a pleasure cruise down the river as far as the Eastern Sea on the Prince's grandest ship. They were to have breakfast and their midday meal on the vessel, before returning for a banquet at the Tisroc's palace that evening.

Unable to forget memories of his last voyage, Peridan sought any distraction and decided that a detailed consideration of the passing scenery might aid his wretched sea-sickness. He was just comparing the lush gardens of the river-side homes to that of the distant desert, when he became aware that he had company.

Slightly embarrassed, he bowed deeply to the Tarkheena. "My lady Tarkheena, I am so very sorry, I did not see you there."

Tarkheena Menelay smiled. "Do not apologise, my lord. You seemed lost in your contemplation of my fair homeland."

"Indeed," he replied. "I was just pondering how it was your gardeners are able to cultivate such verdant gardens in an arid climate."

"With great skill my lord. They are careful with their use of water and choice of plant. I do not lie when I say that we have some of the cleverest gardeners in the world."

"I do not doubt it. I have a great fondness for the garden attached to our house."

The Tarkheena nodded. "I have a great love for my own garden. I take delight in tending it myself, though it would shock my fellow nobility to hear such scandal."

Peridan laughed. "Then you may join the Queen Susan in that scandal, my lady. She too enjoys gardening, though its chief care falls to the moles. They are greatly gifted in tending the soil."

She nodded. "Your companions have caused much wonder, my lord. Many among the nobility of my country are amazed by the population of your country."

He smiled. "It does take time to properly grow accustomed to the talking beasts, but each race has their own area of skills that humans cannot hope to compete with. For the moles it is their cultivation of plants, for the birds it is their sight, for the dogs their sense of smell and so on."

"You make me feel quite envious," she confessed. "I understand you do not come from Narnia originally, my lord Peridan?"

"Nay, my lady Tarkheena, I was born in Archenland."

"One of our neighbours. Though almost unreachable with the desert in the way."

"Indeed. It is a far distance."

"Do you miss it, my lord?"

He considered this for a while. "Not overly, my lady Tarkheena. You see, I left Archenland at the age of sixteen in pursuit of adventure and have only returned occasionally."

"Do you not miss your family?"

"From time to time, but I was a second son and my eldest brother Per was to inherit the estate. So I decided to follow my friends in pursuit of adventure in the new land of Narnia. That was over fourteen years ago now and I have never regretted my decision."

Menelay's normally merry face was strangely sombre as she spoke. "So you have found acceptance and happiness in your new land, my lord?"

Peridan watched her carefully. "Indeed, my Lady Menelay. I beg your pardon, but have I offended you I some way? Are you quite well?"

She nodded. "Our conversation has just reawakened some long-buried memories." She turned to stare out, across the river. "What would you have done if you had not felt at home in Narnia? Would you have returned to your home land?"

"I suppose so," he replied, confused. "May I ask from where these questions come?"

The Tarkheena was silent for a long time. Peridan regarded her without pushing. He waited for her to speak.

Eventually, she found the words.

"Have you ever heard of the land of Ulvar, my lord?"

He thought for a moment. "Yes. Was it not on Calormen's southern border before the Tisroc invaded many years ago?"

She nodded. "It was finally vanquished in that war, but it had long been besieged by the Tisroc (may he live forever). They took many slaves in the decades before the campaign that saw their king captured and beheaded."

Peridan waited, watching her face. The Tarkheena's expression was hard to read. Her eyes were pained and angry, but her tone was almost wistful.

Slowly, she turned to him. "My lord, my mother was an Ulvarran. She was kidnapped from her home in a night-time raid. She was just twelve when she watched her family's home burnt to the ground. My grandfather, my grandmother and both my uncles still trapped inside. She was given no choice … it was either marry my father or become a slave. She always told me that I was the greatest gift she was ever given.

"You see; my father was killed in a border skirmish when I was only three. Mother was pregnant with my brother at the time so we were taken in by my uncle. He raised my brother but hated me, so he married me off as soon as he was able."

A slight smile touched her lips. "I was very fortunate, my dear husband grew fond of me and has been very good to me. I had a friend in my youth who had a very similar experience. She was also reviled for her birth and married off as soon as her father was able to find someone willing to take her on. We would always visit each other while our husbands were away."

She paused.

"I appear to have shocked you, my Lord Peridan."

Peridan was quiet for a time as her narrative sunk in. "I am only a little surprised by your tale, my lady. I did not know that the Calormene nobility married in such a manner."

"They do not often, my lord. My mother always told me that Father claimed he fell in love with her on sight. She mourned her family, but chose to make a new life. She thought that it was the only way to survive."

Peridan nodded. "And my story of leaving my homeland reminded you of your mother?"

She returned the nod. "Indeed. I have always wondered about the life I might have had if mother had married in Ulvar, but then I remember that such thoughts are fruitless and only lead to regret."

"My own father used to say that if we pursue them, the ghosts of what might have been will eventually drive us mad."

Menelay smiled slightly. "You have a hidden talent, my lord. I had no idea that you had such a poetical turn of phrase. You must share your gift with the Grand Vizir."

Peridan laughed at the Tarkheena's wicked smile. "If you dare say such a thing, I shall have to think up a suitable revenge, my lady Tarkheena."

Laughing for the first time, she patted his hand kindly. "Then I think we shall call it a draw, my lord."

* * *

Author's note:

I know, I know! I haven't updated in over a month and I deeply apologise. The truth is that I have been writing and re-writing this chapter for the past fortnight and not been happy with how it was turning out.

RL has also been throwing several things at me, such as work being crazy and also BECOMING AN AUNTIE!

I may have to write a baby into this just so my gorgeous nephew can have a cameo … we shall see!

There has been some significant plot building in this chapter, and I hope you are following my building of extra characters such as Timeon and Menelay.

I will be updating sooner rather than later as term calms down and I find some time to breathe. Anyway, happy new year! Thank you for all the reviews and support Narniac, Meldahlie, Anyabar, Gilgharrah and Guest, I hope you haven't forgotten the story line, I know it's been quite a while.

Thanks again and please read and review! They really do motivate me!

Breeze.


	15. Lineage

Daring to Dream

Chapter Fourteen

Lineage

Author's note: Warning, this chapter is very emotionally intense and deals with the issues of suffering and death.

* * *

It was dark.

In the dim mustiness of the room, Karna sat leaning against a wall. She had not moved for fear of waking Karlis and Ahoz, but her mind was a whirl. Sleep had proven impossible in the face of her mother's illness.

For the first time, she forced herself to consider the reality of her future. Though she could never thank Karlis and Ahoz enough for sheltering her, she could not stay here forever.

But she had nowhere to go.

Karlis had spoken truly when she said that Tarneesh would kill her if he knew she was alive, bur Karna's mind balked at the idea of staying away. This was her _mother!_

Hot tears sprang to her eyes at the prospect of never again seeing Hezal's beloved face. For years, she had been the only person who had ever loved her.

Now she was facing death and she couldn't even nurse her for fear of being seen.

Karna hit the wall in frustration.

 _Was there_ _ **nothing**_ _she could do?_

She buried her face in her hands, desperately trying to find some way that she could escape from this nightmare. Mentally, she tallied up the options.

Visit her mother and risk being discovered. Stay away and let Mother die. Ask Lord Peridan for help and risk a visit from Master Timeon. Another risk that would inevitably lead to questions.

In despair she let herself cry. There really was nothing she could do.

Not caring that her arm might be jolted, Karna balled up on her side and allowed the tears to flow freely. She was done trying to be strong and find a solution. This had all happened because of her _wretched_ dreams. What good had they ever done her?

If she had obeyed her stepfather and married Lavarin, she would now have a settled home and stability for life. She would have been allowed to visit and care for her mother. As it was, she had spurned a sensible match and was now homeless and powerless to do anything to help the one person she loved the most in the world.

Karna cried on, heedless of Karlis' rising and Ahoz's preparations for the day. She did not hear their quiet conversation during the morning meal or his departure for work. She was not even aware of Karlis' return until she felt the cool touch of a wetted cloth to her cheek and turned to see her younger sister bending over her.

Marriage had changed Karlis. She was no longer the quiet, innocent girl who had needed protection from the world of men. She had become a thoughtful, conscientious young woman who loved her husband and knew her place. She had a tranquillity that Karna now recognised and truly envied.

Since she had been a young girl, Karlis had looked up to her oldest sister. Always bolder and more adventurous, Karna had led all the children on their street into many capers and her youngest sister had followed along, dazzled by her older sister's daring. As they had grown older, Karna's confidence blossom into a surety of who she was. With that assurance had come a stubbornness to have her own way which had led to many a punishment at the hands of their father.

But now, Karna wondered if that assurance had been a delusion. _What good had her stubbornness ever brought her?_ Beatings, punishment and the never-ending resentment of her stepfather.

She rose carefully from her huddled posture and took her younger sister's hand. Karlis returned the touch with a squeeze. Her expression was gentle.

"You've been crying." It was a statement of fact.

Karna nodded. "I'm so sorry for putting you and Ahoz through this, my sister."

Karlis stared. "Through what? Karna, you are my sister. What else would I do?"

"Not risk your life for one who doesn't deserve it."

"Don't speak this way. Such thoughts are wrong and only lead to pain."

"How can I not feel pain, knowing that every day I remain here is putting your life in danger?" she demanded.

"And just how is my life in danger?"

"If he finds you here …"

"Why would Father come here? You know he has little interest beyond knowing how my husband's business does. Our father is many things but he isn't curious, Karna."

"Your father." The words were so quiet that Karlis first thought she had misheard. Karna fixed her eyes on the floor, refusing to meet her gaze.

"Excuse me?"

" _Your father_." The words were whispered but distinct. Karlis stared. Her mouth became dry.

" _My_ father?" She choked on the pronoun. Karna was silent.

Karlis stared at her sister in shock. She tried again, this time begging her older sister to look at her.

"Karna," her voice broke and her sister forced herself to look up.

Karna's expression was pained. "Yes, dearest," she murmured, " _your_ father."

Karlis reached for Karna's good hand and grasped it like it was a lifeline. Her heart beat violently inside her chest as she struggled to comprehend what her sister was telling her.

"Tarneesh isn't your father?" she eventually got out. She stared at her sister and received a nod of clarification. "How long have you known?"

The older girl swallowed and settled herself more comfortably, searching for the words.

"Mother told me the night that we first heard of the Narnian delegation's visit," she replied. "I had been wondering for a while and she finally confirmed it for me that evening. You see I am so much taller than all of you, I wondered where my height came from."

"Who is your father?" Karlis asked, wide-eyed.

Karna hesitated. "His name was Harradin Tarkhaan."

"Tarkhaan! Your father was a nobleman?"

"Yes and Mother was married to him very young. I was only a year old when he was killed by the Tisroc and she was sent home to her father's house, the widow of a declared traitor. My grandfather tried to take me from Mother and she refused to give me up. So in revenge he apparently married her off to the first man he saw on the street. That was your father."

"A declared traitor?"

"My father was a great warrior. Mother told me that he saved the Tisroc (may he live forever)'s life in battle and for a reward he gave him the honour of beheading the Ulvarran king."

Karna felt new tears pricking her eyes as she continued. "My father refused to attack an unarmed man. He said that he could not do such a thing in honour. He begged the Tisroc to let him fight the king, or bid him ask him to do any other service, but the Tisroc refused and again commanded him to strike down the bound king. My father apologised and beseeched him to understand."

She wiped away a tear. "My father was struck down for being a coward and declared a traitor because he refused to be a barbarian. _That_ was his reward for years of faithful service to our king and saving his life (may he live for _ever_ )."

Karna sniffed and withdrew her hand to wipe her nose.

Karlis' expression was horrified. She was too shocked to speak. All her life, she had known this girl and loved her. Yet their mother had kept this secret from them all.

"Why didn't you tell me?" she asked eventually.

"What would have been the point?" Karna replied bleakly. "It doesn't change who we are, or what we feel for each other. It just leads to another never-ending line of what ifs. It doesn't affect who I am Karlis. I'm still the same person I always was."

"That's why Father mistreated you," Karlis realised. "I wondered why he punished you far more than the rest of us. I always thought it was because of your stubbornness, but now …"

"He had to live every day with a reminder of who he had married. The widow of a traitor. But with a dowry from a highborn Tarkhaan, which carver could have refused such an offer? Certainly not your father."

Karlis shook her head. "And now you cannot even see her."

Karna closed her eyes, willing the tears to still. Instead of speaking, her younger sister drew her gently into her arms, offering the only comfort that she could.

* * *

It was proving to be a long day. Peridan had spent the morning in the company of Tarkhaan Dallakin, his wife Lasaraleen and several other Calormen nobility. He had found the Tarkheena's attempts to ingratiate herself even more vexing than usual and had been forced to seek solace in the garden. She had been extolling the virtues of their country's army (interspersed with solemn nods and acquiesces from her husband), until he had wanted to leave the room. To hear the ridiculous young woman, speak, she thought it a fitting and acceptable practise for Calormen to invade whomever they wished.

"But what if that country has not attacked Calormen in the first place, my lady?" he had inquired.

Lasaraleen had laughed at this and fluttered her fingers at him. An odd gesture, but one which she seemed to think alluring. "Oh my dear Lord Peridan, the Tisroc (may he live forever) would not attack without just cause. Everything he does is done with discernment and much forethought. Is it for so, my husband?"

Tarkhaan Dallakin had gravelly bowed his head at this. "Indeed, oh my wife. For as the poet has said, the Tisroc (may he live forever) is the chosen vessel of Tash (may he be praised!) upon this earth and all his decisions must be respected and obeyed."

"Indeed, my dear, just as I would have put it. So you see, my lord, everything is as it should be. The Tisroc (may he live forever) does not err in his decisions."

"It must be very reassuring to live in a country ruled by a monarch who is always right," Peridan remarked dryly.

"Do you not trust your kings and queens, my lord?"

"Indeed I do, my lady. But I do not think they would ever claim to have never made a mistake."

"Is your High King not called the Magnificent?"

"It is true; he was named so by Aslan himself …"

"The deity you worship named the king himself?"

"Indeed, my lady. He gave titles to all of our monarchs."

"So does it not then follow that their judgement is correct in all things, if they were chosen by a divine being?"

"I suppose in a way, my lady Tarkheena. But I know that even the kings and queens would not claim to be infallible."

"It is only in the certainty of one's trust in one's monarch that one can be sure of one's country," Tarkhaan Dallakin stated.

"Quite so, my husband," the Tarkheena simpered. "A country is only as strong as its king."

And so the conversation had progressed, endlessly dwelling upon the greatness and surety of their Tisroc's rule, to the point that Peridan had felt decidedly uncomfortable and made a weak excuse to absent himself. He had been trying to will himself to return when the sudden appearance of Timeon had thrown him.

"Timeon?" he enquired, "what is it?" The healer's expression greatly concerned him.

"The girls' mother is gravely ill, Peridan," he replied. "I've just come from there. Karna is beside herself with wanting to return. I persuaded her to remain where she was until I could speak to you."

Peridan frowned. "Consumption? Surely that will be fatal among the peasants of Tashbaan?"

Timeon was grave. "I am certain of it, my lord."

The Narnian lord closed his eyes in pain. "Those poor girls. It seems that one calamity after another haunts their family. How are they?"

"Karlis is more level-headed. Karna was all for returning to her father's home. She was heedless of the danger."

"That is true. She is a passionate young woman and can allow her emotions to lead her astray."

"What is to be done, Peridan? The matter is not as simple as our first visit to heal Karna's shoulder and that journey in itself still holds danger."

The Narnian lord started to pace, his brow furrowed. It seemed that there was little that could be done, but he was loath to let the girls' mother die.

"I must speak with the king," he decided. "I will not act without the counsel of Mr Tumnus and he. The situation is delicate. How is Karna's arm?"

"Healing well, she is simply in need of rest."

Peridan nodded. "I thank you for your help in this matter, my friend. It is a difficult situation."

The healer bowed, leaving Peridan pacing the garden.

He was desirous to pull his friend aside and speak with him that moment, but he knew that such a rash action would raise questions. Discretion was key if this situation was to be resolved. They had already taken too many risks of late.

He forced himself to return to the noisy hall and was soon re-absorbed into another conversation. Only half listening, he found himself looking around at the assembled throng. There were several groups of nobility, laughing, flirting and deep in serious discussion as servants carried trays of food around the room.

The queen and Prince Rabadash stood off to one side, deep in discussion. The couple were surrounded by several Tarkhaans and Tarkheenas, as well as Mr Tumnus and King Edmund. It was impossible to deny that they were a striking pair; both black haired and tall. Her pale and fair and he, bronzed and proud.

Yet there was an undeniable sweetness to Susan's expression which Peridan feared would be crushed by the Calormene Prince. Rabadash was strong and impressive, but there was an undeniable arrogance to his manner that could grate against the most patient temper.

Peridan watched him as he made a joke. The Prince's Calormene companions responded with an easier laughter, whereas Her Highness gave an embarrassed blush and King Edmund managed a polite smile. Mr Tumnus gave a polite nod and managed to turn the conversation to a different topic. Peridan observed a small smile of gratitude from the queen before he noticed the young boy who was standing aloof from the group.

Prince Corin had been pretty well entertained during the first week of their excursion, but he had found today's activities incredibly dull. They had toured the great temple of Tash and he had been forced to feign interest in the boring droning of the High Priest as he had explained the daily sacrifices and running of the place. King Edmund had reprimanded him for inattention and though he had tried to listen, his attention had inevitably waned.

The building had been very large and the massive jewelled statue of Tash was impressive, but he had swiftly lost interest. Now they had been stuck in this stuffy room for close to an hour and he was finding the adult conversation thoroughly tedious. He was just about to go in search of another dessert when he saw Lord Peridan approaching him and smiled.

He liked the Narnian lord a lot. He was an adept story-teller and could often tell some amusing stories of his father's youth. He also felt a connection to Peridan as he had been born in Archenland and knew many of the same people and places.

"Are you bored, my young lord?" Peridan enquired with an undeniable twinkle in his eye.

Corin smiled. "I simply wish to go outside, my lord. Will you take me to the garden?"

"I have already been, but I shall be glad to take you. Will you lead the way?"

The prince needed no further urging and ran out of the room, narrowly avoiding collision with a servant bearing several goblets of wine.

"Less speed, Prince or you will shame us all," Peridan snapped, muttering an apology to the harried server.

Corin had the grace to look shamed, "I'm sorry, my lord Peridan," he replied.

Peridan allowed the boy a smile. "I understand, but it is best to think before you go charging off. Now come before you cause any real damage."

He led the boy along the passage and out into the sunlight. Corin immediately relaxed and took to running around the edge of the garden at Peridan's suggestion.

"See how many circuits you can make before someone comes looking for us."

The prince leapt on this suggestion and was on his eleventh journey round when King Edmund entered the garden with a surprised smile.

"Your idea, my lord?" he enquired.

Peridan laughed. "Indeed, your majesty. His highness seemed a little energetic so I suggested that some circuits might help to alleviate his um … restlessness."

The King laughed and clapped his friend on the shoulder. "I know today's activities have not been an ideal diversion for the young, but we have all had to endure these royal visits in our youth. I remember my own boredom when we toured the Tisroc's palace on our first visit of state. I was only thirteen and far more interested in studying swordplay than diplomacy and politics."

The lord nodded. "I can quite believe it, sire."

Their conversation continued in this vein until they were standing at the far end of the garden, away from curious ears. Once there, Peridan fully explained the history of his relationship with Karna and her family, not sparing his own feelings or his personal comparison of her and Lucy. He gave a full account of his actions – first in bringing Timeon and then of promising their continued aid.

"I could not bear the thought of such a young, vibrant life facing no future," he confessed. "Please tell me if you think I have acted rashly, but I believe I would do the same again."

Edmund was silent was a long time as he digested his friend's narrative. Carefully, he considered their next course of action.

"I could never find wrong in an action that sought to aid one so wholly in need my friend," he began. "But there is much to consider when deciding upon our next action. I cannot but consider the danger we would put her in, by even one stranger showing up at her father's door to help her mother. You have been lucky that no-one has noticed your visits to her brother-in-law's house but I am afraid that our aid must end there. It is too dangerous to offer any assistance beyond medicine."

Peridan nodded. "I was afraid that would be your conclusion, Edmund. I must confess that I concur, but I must go to see her myself. Do you give me leave to visit her tonight when all are abed?"

The king paused. "Can you find your way to Master Ahoz's dwelling without being noticed?"

"I am sure I can, your highness. I believe that I owe Karna an explanation for why we cannot assist her."

Edmund nodded. "It is a difficult situation and I am glad that you could offer some vital aid. But I pity the girl, who can know what course her life will take after this?"

The lord shook his head. "She had faced great hardship, your majesty. Being forced to marry against her will and then being strong enough to stand up to her father."

"I can see why she reminded you on Lucy. She has a will of iron, as Peter would say. I have never seen a more determined mind than she when she feels strongly enough about something."

Peridan smiled. "But they also share an infectious joy in life. Karna was completed transfixed by my descriptions of Narnia. She was utterly lacking in that 'air of mystery' which most Calormene people think impressive. I could not stop thinking about her …"

A new thought struck Edmund. "Truly, Peridan?" he enquired. "Have these thoughts remained?"

The Narnian lord turned away to hide his expression. "They are just thoughts, your highness," he replied. "I shall not regard them."

The king sighed ruefully and joined his friend by the wall. "If they are the type of thoughts that I predict, they might not be so easily ignored, my friend," he stated. "Marken informed me that he has never seen you so distracted. He confessed that he could not comprehend your apparent fascination with this particular maiden."

"It is not fascination, my lord king!" Peridan exclaimed. "I simply could not bear the thought of her light being extinguished. The idea of Karna suffering a life of drudgery and forced servitude to a husband she could not stand …"

"You could not bear the thought?" Edmund finished.

Peridan nodded. "I could not bear it. She was so young and vivid. So refreshing after all I have experienced in this country."

His king agreed. "Then you must do all you can to help her. I give you my leave, Peridan. But do not be caught and do nothing that would threaten her life."

"I thank you, my liege." Peridan bowed deeply before making his departure. He had much to think about and needed to plan his journey carefully. Speed and anonymity were of the essence.

* * *

Ahoz was deeply troubled.

Since his marriage, he had seen the close relationship that Karlis shared with her sisters. It had pleased him to gain two sisters through marriage (after being raised with five brothers) and he had willingly opened his home to Karna when she was in need.

But since the operation upon her arm, Ahoz's concern for Karna had been growing. He was unsure about where she would go after she was healed. He knew that she would want to work and gain her own living, but where would she live? It was unheard of for a woman to live alone in Calormen, unless she was a widow. Karna would face questions her whole life about her past, her husband and how she came to be alone. But he also knew that she could not live with himself and Karlis forever. The knowledge of her existence would eventually get out and Tarneesh would eventually hear of her survival.

He had tried to speak of this with Karlis, but the conversation had inevitably ended in frustration when they could not find a solution. The intervention of the barbarian lord had amazed him. Even when Karlis had explained the nature of their acquaintance, it had still seemed extraordinary to Ahoz that this foreigner would wish to help a Calormen servant girl.

He had been lost in thought for most of the day and had even received a chastisement from his father for inattention. Abashed at his distraction, Ahoz had pushed the quandary to the back of his mind until he left the market for home.

However, even with the problem of Karna's future, he could not help smiling at the thought of returning home to Karlis. He had never known such deep contentment and happiness since his marriage and would never have changed their life. They had managed to attain a marriage of true love as well as economic sense, a very rare thing in their land.

Eagerly, he turned into the passage that led to their home and was quickly through the door. Karlis waited for him with her usual smile and he entered to the welcoming smell of a meaty stew upon the fire.

"Welcome home, oh my husband," she said, drawing out his usual chair.

"Thank you, oh my beloved wife," he replied, kissing her before he sat. "How have you fared this day?"

"Well enough I thank you," Karlis replied as she busied herself with serving the dinner and passing him a cup of ale. "Karna has not been well and she told me … something." Her voice faltered and Ahoz looked up.

"What is it Karlis?" He took her shaking hands in his and drew her on to his lap. Karlis ceased her shaking but he could see the tears in her eyes.

"It's … it's Karna."

"What about her?"

"She … oh Ahoz, she isn't our sister. She's our stepsister. It's why Father was always so cruel to her!"

Unable to help herself, Karlis poured out that morning's revelation and allowed herself to properly lean on someone else for the first time. Ahoz held his wife as she allowed her to finally cry.

It was a surprise and yet it also made a great deal of sense. He had always wondered at his father-in-law's great aversion to his eldest child and now here was the reason. He shook his head at the burden Karna had been carrying. The poor girl. She had already faced such hardship and now she could not even visit her sick mother.

Very gently, Ahoz settled his wife upon his chair and poured them both a bowl of broth. She had calmed down and now allowed him to care for her, drinking from a cup of water and obediently sipping from the bowl of the broth he placed in her hands. They ate quietly until both were finished.

It was not until she had cleared the bowls that Ahoz asked the question.

"How is Karna?"

"Calmer since this morning. We had a long discussion and I think it was a relief to finally share the truth of her birth."

Ahoz nodded. "We must reassure her that she will have a home with us as long as she needs."

Karlis smiled gratefully. "I know, my love. I have told her this. But I think she finds the truth about Mother terrible to bear."

Her husband nodded. He rose to speak to Karna when a quiet knock came upon the door. Cautiously he opened it and was faced with a tall figure, shrouded in a thick grey cloak.

Karlis immediately jumped up. "My Lord Peridan!"

Ahoz stepped aside at the Narnian lord's name and bowed deeply. "It is a pleasure to meet you, my lord. I am Master Ahoz, Mistres Karlis is my wife."

The lord returned the gesture. "I thank you for allowing me to enter your home, Master Ahoz, your wife has been most accommodating. I must apologise for my unannounced visit, but it is vital that I speak with Miss Karna."

The butcher ushered the lord into his home. "Of course my lord, you are most welcome. Karlis, would you wake Karna?"

After thanking Ahoz, Peridan moved through to the other room and found her lying on her usual mattress. She looked exhausted and her brow was creased with pain. Karna moved hurriedly at the sight of him and tried to rise. Immediately, he placed a hand upon her shoulder.

"My lord …" she croaked through dry lips. Karlis passed her a cup, urging her to drink.

"Please rest, Karna. You are not well," Peridan stated, lowering himself beside her. "I am so very sorry about your mother. I wished to speak to you."

"Master Timeon urged me to wait and I have. But what choice do I have, sir? This is my mother."

"And if your father finds out you have visited he will kill you Karna, that is the simple truth."

A tear stained her cheek. Karna angrily brushed it away. "Would you please tell me sir, what good is there in having dreams at all if they only lead to pain and destruction? What good have mine ever brought to me? How can a god which inspires such love and trust in those who follow Him allow an innocent, loving woman who has only ever accepted her lot in life with patience, to be struck down by this vile illness?"

Karna choked through her tears as she continued. "How can your god let my mother … m-my loving and wonderful mother die so young when so many evil people are allowed to thrive? Why can I not even see she who is my whole _world? Why my lord_?"

Peridan listened in anguish as the young woman poured out her grief to him. His heart ached for this vibrant, innocent mind which had had to bear so much strife and pain. Struggling with a stinging behind his own eyes for a moment, he gathered his thoughts.

"Karna. It's true that Aslan is loving and merciful, but he is also fair. He is not a puppet-master who controls our lives. Every man and beast who lives on this beautiful earth has the freedom to act as they chose. Aslan did not will this upon your mother and it grieves him to see her unwell. I am so sorry for your pain. But your mother became ill from where you live, from the dirty water, the close proximity with those who live near you. It was not Aslan's doing. Health and illness are part of our lives. I do not know why some live and some die, but I am so very sorry that your mother is ill."

The girl listened to him mutely. She had no response for him beyond the raw agony of her helplessness. This foreigner … this unknown man from another land had listened to her and shown such kindness. If she had ranted at her step-father in such a way she would have been struck and called a bastard. But this man chose to listen. He chose to console her and explain why these awful things had happened.

A memory stirred. She was standing in a garden, facing the very lion Peridan had spoken of. Words returned to her, words that had haunted her dreams …

" _Take heart my daughter. You shall find the joy you seek, but know that the path to joy is wracked by great sorrow. Trust in your courage and trust in me.'_

"The path to joy is wracked by great sorrow." Karna spoke the words without realising it and found the Narnian lord staring at her.

"It is," he agreed. Karna flushed and looked down. She wiped her cheeks, embarrassed.

"I am sorry, my Lord Peridan," she murmured. "It has been a _trying_ few days." Peridan nodded. "I thank you for your words, I have much to think on."

"Karna." She made herself look up. "I have spoken to King Edmund. He greatly sympathises with your situation, but we both agree that the danger to you is too great. We cannot risk a visit to your father's house."

Karna could not help replying. "Stepfather, my lord."

Peridan stared at her, "I beg your pardon?"

Suddenly she found that she could not bear any more lies. "Tarneesh is my stepfather, it is why he has always hated me."

Before she could think better of it, Karna poured out her story for the second time that day and was thoroughly exhausted upon its completion. Shocked, Peridan sat in deep thought for a long time before he eventually rose.

"I should leave," he said. "Please give me your word that you will not visit your step-father's house Karna. Please, I ask you."

Too tired to fight any more, Karna agreed.

Peridan nodded. "I thank you. I have much to think on. Please know that I am doing everything in my power to help you."

Very gently he lifted a hand and with a touch as soft as a bird's wing, stroked her cheek.

"I will not let you abandon your dreams, Karna daughter of Harradin. You must live and have hope."

As silently as he had come, the Narnian lord disappeared into the night.

* * *

Author's note:

It would be fair to say that this chapter has exhausted me to write. I hope I've managed the right balance with the emotions and drama of the situation. But it is my longest yet (except chapter 1)!

The problem is, it was only on writing the characters dealing with the reality of the situation that I've realised how horrible I have been to Karna! The conversation between her and Peridan was a particularly difficult one to balance and pace.

I have also explored a lot more of Peridan's feelings for her and where they come from (he's finally starting to get the hint!). I am now officially on holiday and apparently exhausting myself!

I am aiming to write the next chapter later this week (when I have recovered from this one!). Thank you so much to Meldahlie, anyabar, Kilgharrah, guest (Narniac?) and Tellyouallaboutit for reviewing. It amazed me how quickly you reviewed. I was very flattered to see how enthusiastic you were about the update. Hope this one lived up to it!

Again, thanks so much for reading, it really means the world!

Breeze.


	16. Getting to the Heart of the Matter

Daring to Dream

Chapter Fifteen

Getting to the Heart of the Matter

Even in the depths of winter, Queen Susan of Narnia slept with the windows open.

Her favourite sound had always been the waves crashing upon the rocks, far below Cair Paravel. Its music had often lulled her to sleep, during both calms and storms. It was one of the things she missed the most in Tashbaan.

The prince and his people had been very kind. No expense had been spared in the setting up of their home and she had every luxury that heart could desire. But the metallic tinkling of the fountain beneath her window was nothing compared to the never-ending breathing of the Eastern Ocean's great waves.

She had even mentioned it to the prince and he had had a pretty little caged bird brought in to please her. The dear little creature sung merrily all day for Susan. But she found herself more heart broken by it captivity than comforted by its song.

She lay within the silken sheets of the bed, comparing this chamber to her own in Cair Paravel as she had done so many times before. It was beautifully decorated in greens and golds, bright tapestries covered the walls and ornate tiles covered the floor.

She glanced down at the panther that slumbered upon the hearthrug and smiled.

Dell, her panther guard and closest friend, had struggled with the warmer climate. Though she was not one to complain, the big cat found the sand and arid climate very irritating. There had been several muttered references to "sand in paws" and there "never being a fresh breeze".

As quietly as she could, Susan rose from the bed, endeavouring as she often did to sneak past her friend. It never worked.

She was only a few steps away from the bed when a husky voice enquired,

"Will you ever cease in your attempts to sneak past me, your highness?"

Susan turned with a smile to see one bright dark eye watching her. Dell was still in the same position but she stretched her back paws lazily, eyes never leaving Susan.

"I remember when you first tried that as a little girl. It amused me then. It seems that old habits die hard."

The dark-haired queen laughed. "Wouldn't you be shocked if I didn't persist in such tricks, Dell?" she enquired.

The panther gave a languid smile and finally stretched, rising from her bed upon the rug. "I suppose so, Susan." She approached the young woman with a smile. "Good morning my friend. I trust that you rested well?"

Susan touched the panther's head in a tender gesture that Dell tolerated from no-one else. "I did I thank you. What of you? Did the heat bother you again?"

"Fur as thick as mine was not meant for such a hot climate, but your highness' suggestion of lying by the open window certainly helped."

"I am glad." Susan's response was warm, but her eyes turned to linger upon the view with a distraction that struck Dell.

"Susan?" The queen glanced down. "Tell me what distracts you. You seem … concerned."

Susan bowed her head and did not immediately respond.

The panther waited. She knew that her queen would speak eventually, though it sometimes took a long time for her to gather her thoughts.

Eventually, she did.

"Dell, what think you of the prince?"

Dell blinked. "In what manner, your highness?"

"Do you think him a good man?"

"He is certainly very impressive."

"I know and that is what I have been puzzling over. During the past two weeks he has been attentive and charming. He and his excellent father have been very obliging, but I still do not feel as though I properly know him and that is what bothers me."

"Do you think he is hiding his true nature?"

"Not hiding exactly. But I cannot tell what his true nature is behind all the air of mystery and grandeur that they put on here. In manners and attitude, he seems to be exactly what he should be, but I've seen no burst of real feeling from him. Every speech and action seems carefully rehearsed and it bothers me."

Dell gently nudged Susan's leg with her head. "Susan, look at me."

The young queen glanced down. "My friend, no-one is forcing you to make a decision about this Rabadash today. I would suggest that you make it your task to discover his true character. Ask him probing questions that will force a true opinion and not allow a charming façade. Trust you own judgement, my queen. I can avouch for its being perfectly sound."

Susan allowed herself to laugh and knelt down to hug her friend. "Thank you Dell. I will follow your advice. I suppose the truth of getting married to a man who actually feels like a stranger frightened me."

The panther rubbed her face against Susan's cheek; a low rumble escaped from her chest. "Trust your heart, my queen. I too will watch and together we will discover the Prince's real character."

* * *

 _The music was infectious as she wandered through the main ballroom of the Tisroc's palace. To her left she watched the beautifully dressed couples dancing elegantly to the musicians' music._

 _Unable to help the memories that flooded her mind, she remembered the time when she had danced at such a gathering, her cheeks blushing with every scorching gaze she had received from her new husband. He might have been a full twenty years older than she, but he had proven to be a very loving husband. His new bride had received more affection from him in the first month of their marriage than she had experienced in all of her lonely childhood._

 _She found a seat to one side and watched the dancers happily, a hand resting upon her swollen belly. Harradin had been against her attending tonight's ball, but she had not wished to miss her friend._

" _I'll be fine, Harradin," she had chided as they dressed. "Or I won't see Menelay until the autumn. She'll be leaving for her husband's palace before the month is out and you know that I won't be leaving our home any time soon."_

" _But Hezayla you will exhaust yourself."_

" _Not if I'm careful and I promise you I will be."_

 _In the end he had relented, but not before he had fussed over the positioning of rugs and curtains in the litter._

" _Honestly, my husband, you are worse than a nursemaid."_

" _I simply wish to feel assured that my wife and child are well cared for," he replied with a significant look._

 _Hezayla laughed. Struck anew by how privileged she was to see this tender, gentle side of her brave husband. Harradin Tarkhaan was renowned as a fearless opponent in battle and she could only imagine how his enemies must feel when facing him on the battlefield._

 _The evening had passed in a comfortable blur as the feast had been enjoyed and the dancing begun. Harradin had seen Hezayla comfortably installed in a chair before heading off to discuss tactics with Elgamuth Tarkhaan. She had just considered taking a turnabout the room when a familiar form had blocked her view of the dancers._

" _Menelay!" she exclaimed, struggling to rise._

 _The older girl laughed and stayed her with a hand. "Stay where you are, my friend," she advised, taking the next seat. "I'm amazed Harradin allowed you to come tonight in your condition. How long do you have?"_

 _Hezayla smiled. "Just under a month. When summer is at its hottest."_

" _I'm surprised he isn't taking you away to the Southern Mountains for your health."_

" _He's afraid that journey will be too much."_

" _But wouldn't you prefer the cool of the countryside in summer's awful heat? I'm certain that the Valley of a Thousand Perfumes would be divine at this time of year."_

 _The younger Tarkheena smiled. "It would, but I have so little time left before the birth that there seemed to be no point."_

 _The two young women spoke for a time before Harradin approached. He offered his wife his arm with a deep bow to Menelay._

" _I apologise for stealing her away, Tarkheena Menelay but I have indulged her need for social interaction and must now insist that I be allowed to take care of her health, even if she will not."_

 _With a laugh, the older Tarkheena curtseyed deeply. "I salute your excellent care of your young wife, my lord Harradin."_

 _Hezayla joined in the laughter and moved to follow her husband, only to find that she could not find him. In a moment, the colours swirled around her and she found herself unable to focus upon one face of point in the ball room. "Harradin?" she called, "Menelay, where are you?"_

 _Instinctively, her hand moved to rest upon her belly. To her horror, she found her stomach flat. "Karna?" she called, "My daughter, where are you?"_

Soaked in sweat, Hezal jerked awake. She searched the confines of the room and found the concerned face of her daughter …

"Tarlana," she exclaimed, lying back down.

"Mother, are you well? You seemed to be having a nightmare." Tarlana bathed her head with a cool rag. "You mentioned Karna," she added quietly.

"I … I could not find her …" Her mother murmured.

Hezal searched the room urgently.

"They're all add work," Tarlana comforted. "Father, Kanzeesh and Andur all left over an hour ago."

"Why are you not at work, my daughter?"

The girl gently pushed her mother back down before remoistening the rag.

"Father has given me the past three days off to care for you, Mother," she replied. "I have been doing what I can, but you have been drifting in and out of consciousness. The fever broke last night."

"Three days?" Hezal struggled to sit up. "How have you been coping? How is Karna's arm?"

"She is healing well, Karlis says. Would you care for some broth?"

Hezal accepted a cup of watery soup, though she had little appetite. "I dreamt of your sister," she confided. "Before she was born."

Tarlana nodded. Her relief at her mother's waking was palpable and she busied herself with tidying the bedchamber to hide it. She had not left Hezal's side in three days and little rest and sustenance had taken their toll on her spirits. She took a long sip of water and tidied her brother's blanket, just to have something to do.

"Karlis may visit today," she said. "Karna has been going frantic from not being able to see you, but we all agreed that it was for the best."

Hezal nodded sadly. "It would do no good and only risk her life if she were to come. I suppose she took the news badly?"

Her daughter sighed. "She did. But we have even consulted with the Narnian lord and he promised to do all within his power to help us."

Her mother was suddenly solemn. "The Narnian lord knows our concerns?"

"Yes Mother."

"It would do better for him to stay far from this business. The more he is seen outside your sister's door, the more risk there is of her being discovered."

"He said as much, Mother. It was agreed that he would not return and the healer will only return if he is needed."

"Good," Hezal nodded her approval. "It is a relief to know that she is alright. I don't know what we would have done if he had not offered."

"We must praise Tash for his benevolence at this difficult time."

"Yes, we must …" she began, but could get no further as a violent cough wracked her body. Tarlana was by her side in a moment, offering a bowl.

"Mother, you mustn't exert yourself. I can take care of Father and my brothers. You must focus your energies upon getting better."

Hezal allowed Tarlana to bear away the bowl and once more wet her fevered brow. What she missed was the blood that smeared the bowl and her daughter's haunted expression.

She sank wearily on to the mattress, remembering the dream. It seemed odd to think that she had once worn the finest silks and cared about the state of her hair. If her young married self could have seen the future that lay ahead …

Annoyed at the turn of her thoughts, she chose to watch her daughter instead as she tidied the room, carrying away the bowl and running a quick broom across the floor.

"How has business been, this week?" she asked.

Tarlana continued her work as she spoke. "Well enough. Father predicts a rise in demand as Prince Rabadash's marriage to the barbarian queen approaches."

"Are they not yet betrothed?"

"Not officially. But we all expect to hear the news soon. She has now been here close to two weeks."

Hezal listened to her daughter speak about the suitability of the marriage, returning to her old topic of how no-one would ever be worthy of their noble crown prince.

At one point she nearly laughed. It was pleasant to hear Tarlana sounding more like her old self.

"Have you seen the barbarian queen, my daughter?"

"I did the day before you fell ill, Mother. It's true that she is indeed very lovely. She has curling hair as black as night, but her skin is much paler than our noble prince's. Her manner of dress is very funny as well, she only dresses in silks and satins, but her hair is never adorned with veil or head scarf. I heard Kediza remark that she had only every seen the queen wear a delicate crown upon her hair called a tiara. Hers was wrought from gold and inset with many red stones called rubies."

The conversation continued in this manner for the rest of the morning until a quiet knocking brought the entrance of Karlis. After an affectionate greeting, Hezal managed to sit up and they enjoyed a cup of tea together. Karlis had brought some special herbs from the Narnian healer and had the pleasure of seeing her mother's face regain some colour. They spoke quietly of Karna and but avoided the unspeakable topic.

It was only once Karlis had risen to leave that Hezal made herself ask. "What does Karna say of the future, my daughter?"

Karlis sighed. "Very little, Mother. We do not know what can be done. The suggestion has been made that she might travel to another city to find work as a maid or servant. But we do not know. Lord Peridan has offered his help, but what could he really do?"

Hezal patted her youngest daughter's hand. "We must trust her future to Tash and be have faith in whatever He decides, my daughters."

And with that they were forced to be content.

* * *

Lord Marken of Narnia sat staring at the piece of parchment. He had been asked to write an official letter of thanks by the king to Master Tirshan, expressing their gratitude for the excellent home he had provided them with for the duration of their stay.

This was the type of task for which Peridan was perfect. But again, he was not to be found. Instead, it was _he_ who had been asked to write a flowery epistle to satisfy their hosts' ridiculous notions of decorum.

Marken sighed and thrust the pen aside for the moment. He rose abruptly and started pacing the length of the room.

He knew that it was not just he who had noticed the difference in Peridan's behaviour. Over the past three weeks, his friends had dramatically transformed from an experienced and learned ambassador to someone that was distracted and fixated upon his own desires.

Peridan has always been focussed upon the task at hand and had an innate ability to interact with any culture or people. He had never failed to complete his duties without complete attention and skill.

But here he was again, left in the lurch while Peridan was away on some unknown errand and undoubtedly to do with _that girl_.

Marken bit his lip at the ungallant thought.

It wasn't that he had any problem with Karna herself. She seemed a pleasant and nice enough girl. He also empathised with the hardships she had faced. But surely there were a hundred such stories of poverty and human cruelty in this large city? _Why_ was it that Peridan was so fixated by this one girl?

He shook his head.

He did partly understand the attraction; Karna _was_ a pretty girl. But what he could not fathom was how his conscientious friend could so easily abandon his duties.

Again, Marken shook his head.

In his mind he greatly feared the future that his friend faced. He believed that they would not be in this city for much longer and by the mane, what would Peridan do when they left?

With a groan, the Narnian lord forced himself to return to his chair and the odious task at hand.

* * *

Peridan returned to the Narnian delegation's house as the shadows were lengthening. He had barely had time to wash and remove his dusty tunic before there was a loud rapping upon the door.

He pulled a clean linen shirt over his head before calling, "Enter!"

He grinned at the entrance of Marken and saw his friend's now familiar world-weary expression.

"What was it today, Marken? Mistress Abilene's continued inquiries?"

Marken scowled. "No, it was a letter of gratitude to Master Tirshan about the loan of his home. Though why King Edmund did not ask Mr Tumnus to write I will never know. We all know that he has by far the most skill with a pen."

Peridan laughed as he chose between his two dress tunics.

The sudden thought of the Calormen nobility's scandal at his limited wardrobe amused him. He was sure that they would have noticed that he only had two smarter tunics for evening occasions and would have gossiped scandalously behind their perfumed and be-ringed hands about him.

He chose the blue and was just donning it when he realised that his friend was still frowning. "What is amiss, Marken?" he enquired. "I am sure the letter was a tiresome thing to write but it cannot have put you _that_ much out of humour, surely?"

Marken sighed. "Peridan, I am concerned, my friend …"

"What about?"

Marken was silenced by the entrance of Kind Edmund stating that they were bidden to come for dinner.

Peridan bowed and turned gravely to his friend. "I can see that you are truly worried Marken and promise that we will have this conversation, but we must depart."

The other lord nodded, but determined that they would. This matter _must_ be discussed without much further delay.

The affair that evening was a party within the Tisroc's pleasure gardens. All of the royal family were present, including the ruler himself, which meant that the ceremony continued for even longer than usual.

Peridan played his role as he always did, making polite conversation with the Princess Ritaraleen and Prince Aklamash, the Tisroc's fourth son. They were just discussing the pleasures of riding when he found himself pondering Karna's words from that morning.

Her father had actually been a Tarkhaan? That made Karna a Tarkheena, regardless of her upbringing. He was so wrapt in thought that he missed a comment from the Princess.

"I apologise your highness, I missed your last comment?"

The princess tittered prettily. "I was just remarking, my lord, that we cannot wait to hear of Queen Susan's official engagement to my brother. Aklamash has remarked that he has actually heard Rabadash pacing long into the night, it is such an amusing thought!"

Peridan felt a nervous lurch in his gut.

"Why, princess?"

"Why because Rabadash has never been so besotted by a woman before as he is with your queen! We have seen his interest rise and wane over a couple of months with other ladies, but he has driven us positively to distraction with his recounting of Queen Susan's many perfections over the winter months. And now to hear that he has actually taken to pacing to help release his excess … energy …"

Prince Ritaraleen broke into helpless giggles and Prince Aklamash made a hurried apology for his sister's behaviour.

"We mean no offence, my lord," he quickly assured him. "But our brother is desperate to claim the queen so that they may be married."

Peridan nodded, trying to turn the conversation to safer topics as he felt his anxiety growing. He knew as well as Edmund that Susan was hesitating because she was still not sure. The longer that they remained, the more awkward their situation would certainly become as their hosts grew impatient.

He was spared the effort of finding a new topic, however, as they were that moment called into dinner. Peridan bowed to both royals and offered the princess his arm as they entered the little tented pavilion that had been set up for the meal. He found, to his relief, that he was not seated near either.

It was only once the soup was being served that he realised who his eating companion was.

"Well met, my Lord Peridan."

He smiled with pleasure. "Good evening, my lady Menelay, it is a pleasure to see you again. It has been a few days."

The older Tarkheena smiled. "All of four, my lord. I am glad I made such a positive impression."

Peridan inclined his head and relaxed into a more enjoyable conversation. There was something so candid and honest about the older woman, he did not feel on edge as he so often did around the Calormen.

They spoke easily of the evening's entertainment and the previous day's boating excursion. Peridan was even so forward as to admit his sea-sickness, a thing which made the Tarkheena laugh.

"It is good to know that I am not the only person who struggles with watercraft, my lord!"

Shared anecdotes of childhood follies then followed this amusement and they were well into the fish course before Menelay's face sobered and she returned to a more solemn topic.

"I am grateful to your lordship for listening to my tale the last time we met. It is not a topic that it is considered polite to speak about. But I thought you would understand."

Peridan nodded. "I do indeed comprehend, my lady Menelay." A thought struck him. "May I ask a more sensitive question?"

"Indeed, my lord."

"What would be the fate of an illegitimate child in Calormen?"

She sighed. "It would entirely depend upon who its father was. No Tarkhaan would kill his own child, but the matter would be hushed up and the child raised as a burden. If a boy he would be sent off to the army and if a girl, she would be married off to the first groom who offered."

"What would happen to the wife of a declared traitor?"

Menelay stared at him. "A declared traitor, my lord?"

"If a man was declared a traitor to his country by the Tisroc, would his family be made to suffer?"

"Yes. His wealth and possessions would be claimed by the crown and his wife would be homeless. Probably sent back to her father's house."

They were silent for a time, both lost in their own thoughts. Peridan tried to engross himself with his meal, worrying whether he had asked too much. There had been a light of recognition in the Tarkheena's eye that had alarmed him.

It was she who broke the silence.

"If you will forgive me, Lord Peridan. It seems that your questions spring from some prior knowledge of similar events?"

Peridan swallowed. He _had_ asked too much. Where was his usual calm, measured thought? Why had he blurted out such a question that could only raise intrigue and inquiry?

He was still mentally berating himself when she spoke again.

"I only ask, my lord, because your questions remind me greatly of events that occurred nearly twenty years ago."

"Indeed, what events are they, my Lady Menelay?"

She gave him a penetrating glance. "My only request, my lord. Is that you return my candour with equal transparency."

Peridan frowned and chose his words with care. "Madam. I have no greater wish that to speak openly with you. But please understand, there are those who might be hurt if their current situation was known. Do you give me leave to conceal sensitive information where situation requires it?"

Though clearly intrigued by his cryptic response, the Tarkheena agreed.

"Very well, my lord. Your words reminded me of a man declared a traitor twenty years ago by the Tisroc (may he live forever). His name was Tarkhaan Harradin, a captain in the Tisroc's army and a very noble man. His wife Hezayla was a childhood friend of mine and a very dear woman. He was declared a traitor after refusing to behead the Ulvarran king at the Tisroc's request (may he live forever). The Tisroc beheaded him for his disobedience in that instant and his wife was forced to return to her father's home with their young daughter. I had never heard of her since."

"They had a young daughter?" Peridan all by sputtered.

Menelay nodded, surprised by his response. "Yes, my lord. Harradin was so kind as to let his wife name their daughter after her own mother, a poor servant girl that had been seduced by her father."

"What was their baby's name?"

"Karna, my lord."

* * *

Author's note:

Duh, duh duuuuhhhh!

The link is finally out! I hinted at this about seven (?) chapters back I think! Did anyone see it coming? Peridan finally knows Menelay's connection to Karna and who can tell where this link will lead … wait and see my friends!

It's actually very exciting to get to this bit because I know my way to the end from here. It will take us a while to get there, but I know where we're going now!

The tension is building, Rabadash is working off him (ahem) energy and Susan is getting confused. Heza's health is deteriorating and we are heading towards some dramatic times people!

I am sorry this isn't up when I promised but work re-started and one bout of food poisoning later (thanks work!) we have a new chapter.

I have to admit one thing though – Dell or the idea of the Pevensies having large cat body guards is an idea I have borrowed from an old friend of mine on here. Her name is rthstewart and her wonderful fic _By Royal Decree_ (on my favourites list) mentioned Edmund having a wonderfully sardonic tiger companion named Jalur and I wanted Susan to have one. So Dell was created. I am not trying to steal from Ruth's genius, just borrow this one idea because I wanted Susan to have someone to confide in and a hand-maid didn't work in my head. Dell is actually based on my own little panther, a very noisy teenager of a panther called Kipper who is currently curled up beside me and has a very similar habit of never missing me leaving my bed in the morning (although he inevitably announces it is time for his breakfast rather than being a listening ear).

I hope you enjoyed the different consideration of the characters' problems.

Thank you for reading and please tell me what you think. The response to the previous chapter just made my week! You were all so supportive and I became very nervous about covering more sensitive topics, so a HUGE thank you! Especially Mel, Kilgharrah, anyabar, narniac (again guest!) Zoey and Hachiko33200.

I will try to update soon and please tell me what you think in the reviews! I value every view, review, favourite and person who puts this on their watch list.

Thank you all!

Breeze.


	17. A Mother's Love

Daring to Dream

Chapter Sixteen

A Mother's Love

Peridan stared at Menelay for a full minute before he managed to choke out.

"I am sorry, my lady, could you repeat what you just said?"

The Tarkheena observed the Narnian lord for a long moment. "I said that their daughter was named Karna, my lord. She was named after the lady Hezayla's mother. She was a pretty servant girl seduced by the son of her lord and promises of marriage. A story that is all too often seen, I am afraid."

Menelay regarded her companion shrewdly. He nodded but seemed deeply in thought. It was obvious that something in her story was familiar to him. But what, she could not imagine.

He eventually spoke.

"How old would this child be now?"

"Eighteen. She was born the same year as my eldest son."

He nodded again. His expression distracted.

"Eighteen … do you know anything of your old friend, my lady?"

"Nothing, my lord. Hezayla disappeared from society immediately after the news of her husband's death was told. I do not know what happened to her, or her daughter. I always thought that she must have remarried."

"She did."

Menelay gasped. "You have heard of Tarkheena Hezayla, my lord Peridan?"

He sighed. "Not that name specifically. But I have met a servant girl called Karna whose mother is called Hezal."

The Tarkheena stared at him.

Peridan grew embarrassed. "Forgive the ambiguity of my words, my lady. But what I have to relate is a delicate matter. There are lives at risk if I am too candid. Have I your word that you are a true friend of the Tarkheena Hezayla and her daughter?"

"Your have to ask, my lord?" came the indignant reply. "I can assure you that I would do everything within my power to help my friend, or her daughter."

Despite her obvious outrage at the question, Peridan felt justified.

"I apologise, but I had to be certain." He drew a deep breath, gathering his thoughts. "I am acquainted with Miss Karna. I first met her because she is a servant in Master Tirshan's household. She was part of a dancing display that he put on to welcome us to Tashbaan and I chose to sit beside her at the meal that followed. I was instantly intrigued. She is a fascinating girl and has a voracious curiosity about the world. She was so … different to what I expected from a Calormene servant girl."

It was only as he spoke of it that Peridan realised how long ago that now felt, though it had only been a month or five weeks at most.

"The others girls I have met have been so afraid and subservient, but Karna was so interested in places she had not seen. She reminded me of a friend from home. About a week passed and I was walking to a meal with Lord Marken when I chanced to meet Karna in the street."

He paused, the memory returning vividly. "She was so changed. All vibrant curiosity was extinguished and she seemed so dull and lifeless. She said that she was to be married most advantageously to a blacksmith and I was struck by how little emotion she showed."

"A blacksmith? Whom did Hezayla marry?" Menelay spoke quietly, the reality sinking in. _What had become of her old friend?_

Peridan sighed. "Karna has told me that her grandfather forced her mother to marry the first man he met on the street. I understand he is a carver named Tarneesh."

"A carver … but why would her father lower himself to such a connection?"

"I believe that her mother refused to give Karna up and so the Tarkhaan married her off in revenge for her disobedience."

Menelay closed her eyes in pain. "Oh Hezayla. What a choice to face! If I know my friend, she would have borne her father's will and submitted to the marriage without complaint. I never knew a mother more in love with her child than she with her daughter. They both worshipped Karna."

Peridan nodded. "It sounds as though she has faced much hardship. But Karna and her two sisters have grown up to be kind, intelligent girls. I understand there are also two sons."

A slight smile touched the Tarkheena's lips for a moment. "Five children. Hezayla would have loved that. She always wanted a large family."

"I have never met the mother, but her daughters are a credit to her."

"Why were you so concerned, my lord? What did you fear by letting me know of my friend's existence?"

He frowned. "I did not hear of Karna for a week after our meeting in the street. The next thing I knew of her was when I overheard her sister Tarlana crying in our house one morning. She mentioned Karna being in great trouble and I could not stop myself from asking what had happened. She had been unhappy with her betrothal from the start and publicly disgraced the man by rejecting him in front of the local elders and her stepfather. Her stepfather was enraged and beat Karna badly because she has so publicly humiliated him. She managed to make it to her sister Karlis' house with severe bruising and a broken arm."

He took a sip of wine and frowned deeply. "I agreed to help and brought our physician Master Timeon with me to heal Karna. It was a risk, because if her stepfather finds out that she survived he will be sure to seek her out and kill her for so publicly mortifying his honour. Timeon was able to reset her bone and patch her up, praise Aslan. But she is now living in hiding with her younger sister and in fear of her life if she even steps outside the door. To make matters worse, Mistress Hezal has become gravely ill and it seems likely that she will die of the consumption. Karna is understandably desperate to see her mother, but to go anywhere near Tarneesh's house would mean death."

Menelay stared at him for a long time. Her food had long since gone cold and she seemed rooted to the spot as she took in all he had said. Peridan watched her anxiously. He had no idea how she would respond to his story, though he felt sure of her support for Karna's plight.

When she did speak, her face had drained of colour. "It is vital she is never seen by her step father, my lord. I can understand why she acted as she did, but to so publicly declare her distaste for the man her stepfather has chosen and in front of the elders … that is a true humiliation in Calormene society."

Peridan nodded. "This was explained to me. It is why I was so hesitant about sharing her whereabouts with you."

"I understand, my lord, truly. Karna is in a dangerous position."

"I am very concerned about her. She cannot remain at her brother-in-law's house indefinitely. There is great fear for her future. She will be unable to work in Tashbaan without having to give reference to her previous work and there is little opportunity of income for an unmarried young woman who has left her previous employment."

"I might be able to help, my lord. Do you think Karna would be willing to come and work in my house? My husband and I have a palace on the Northern Plains. She could come to work for us there without fear of discovery and start a new life. She can only do that through leaving Tashbaan."

Peridan's heart leapt. "You would be willing to help her, my lady?"

"Of course, my lord. I would do anything in my power to help the daughter of my oldest friend."

Peridan would have bowed to her if they had not been sitting. "My lady, you have eased my heart greatly. Thank you, so very much."

Menelay smiled for the first time. "I am pleased I can help. But we must have more a more private conversation, my lord Peridan. This is hardly the safest location to discuss such delicate matters."

He chanced a look around the feasting hall and though none were listening in, their neighbours' proximity was a cause for concern.

He nodded. "I agree. May I invite you for lunch tomorrow, my lady Tarkheena?"

She smiled. "I should be delighted, my Lord Peridan."

He returned to his food, his heart feeling lighter than it had in days. Silently, he sent a prayer of thanks of Aslan. Maybe Karna's troubles would finally be over.

* * *

Karna's existence seemed to be a mixture of two emotions at the moment – tedium and worry. Her days were spent in Ahoz and Karlis' inner room, waiting for her arm to fully heal with little to do while she worried about their mother. She could not even use her hands to distract herself with sewing, cookery or something useful because of her arm. So she took to entertaining Karlis as best she could while her sister went about her everyday tasks.

Karlis would cook, clean and mend, whilst switching between exasperation and amusement at her older sister's antics. She could certainly empathise with Karna's boredom, but there was little she could do to alleviate it, and she was also dreadfully worried about their mother.

She had been somewhat reassured by her condition during her last visit, but Tarlana had also shown her the blood soaked cloth that Hezal had coughed into. None of them wished to face the reality of what certainly lay ahead. So their days were spent living for the moment, not looking beyond.

"I wonder how the girls are at Master Tirshan's?" Karna mused one afternoon as Karlis scrubbed the floor. "Do you think they are still awkward around the Narnians?"

Karlis smiled. "I would imagine so. I am still taken aback when Master Timeon visits. He is so different to the Tarkhaans and Tarkheenas."

"In appearance and manner," Karna agreed. "What do you think of Master Timeon's manner of address? I find it so refreshing compared to the Calormene style."

"You mean the fact that he gets to the point rather than quoting poetry and being mysterious?" Karlis queried.

"Yes. I wish that we could greet our neighbours with a simple, "good day" rather than having to quote and say "has the poet not said" or "is it not quoted in verse that". Master Timeon simply enquires after our health with perfect curtesy and then gets to the point."

Her sister laughed. "Yes, but is it not more impressive when such a manner of speech is used?"

"I think there is a difference between mystery and tedium."

Karlis laughed heartily. "I can see the truth in that. It does seem that the nobility is far worse at doing it than we common folk."

"Well they have more time to waste."

Both sisters laughed at the quirks of their culture.

"It seems that you are very taken with the Narnians, Karna," Karlis suggested with a smile.

Karna sighed, not missing the implication. "I cannot deny it, Karlis. I find their lack of affectation so refreshing. Do you not recall how long I spoke about my conversation with Lord Peridan? Think of what they have done for us in our brief acquaintance. He brought his physician to heal me, has done everything within his power to help mother and has even offered his help with sorting my future. They are a noble people and it cannot be denied."

"That is true. But have you not considered that Lord Peridan might have an ulterior motive?"

"What do you mean?"

Karlis toyed with her brush for a moment to avoid looking at her sister. "Maybe he would not have been so quick to offer help if … if it had been for another person."

Karna blinked, confused. "What?"

"Karna, think of what he has done. Not only has Lord Peridan risked offending their hosts by coming to heal you, but he came instantly to speak to you when he heard about Mother's illness."

"He did that to ensure I would not be hurt or act rashly."

"Exactly. _You_ were his inducement for immediate action. He could have sent Master Timeon to give advice, but he came himself."

"Are you accusing him of disinterest towards Mother?"

"No, I am saying that helping Mother, though important, was not his primary motivation." Karlis huffed with exasperation at her sister's slowness. "I am saying _you_ were the inducement, Karna. He came to see and help _you!_ "

Karna stared as Karlis' idea sunk in. "You cannot mean … Karlis you cannot think that Lord Peridan has come to care for me in _that_ way?"

"What other reason is there for his attentions?"

"He is fulfilling his knightly duty."

"That does not explain the lengths he has gone to, Karna. You know it."

"I do not know it. I don't agree Karlis, he could not care for me in that way. It cannot happen."

"Why should it not?"

"Because he is a Lord! I am a mere servant girl. We are from two such different cultures! There is no way that we could ever marry."

"But why could you not, my sister? If he loved you …"

" _Love_? Karlis, please be rational and face reality. You and Ahoz are so blessed to have what you do. I have never seen love in a marriage, except yours. There is no chance that a noble, honourable man such as Lord Peridan could care for so lowly a maiden as I."

"Why not, Karna? Why do you sell yourself so short?"

"I do not, I just know real life."

Karna sighed.

"I have not given up dreaming Karlis, but I have a better understanding of what real life holds now. You have found love, but it came through an arranged marriage. When have you ever heard of a woman choosing her own husband?"

"But things are different in Narnia …"

"Are they? Do you not see Queen Susan of Narnia visiting Tashbaan at this very moment, for the purpose of having an arranged marriage? We dream of such things in girlhood, Karlis, but they almost never come true."

Karlis did not reply but attacked a muddy streak with slightly more vehemence than was probably necessary. She did not think her interpretation of events was so wrong. But then, Karna had faced such hardship that maybe it would always affect the way she saw things.

The afternoon passed in its usual steady plod and she was just looking for Ahoz's return from work when the door slammed open. Neither sister had reacted before Tarlana started to speak. Her face was streaked with tears.

"It's Mother ..."

Karlis gasped. Karna screamed.

"No!"

Tarlana wiped her eyes and nodded. "She took a bad spell and has been coughing horribly. She can't breathe. I don't think she has long. I left Tamara with her …"

Karna was on her feet in a moment.

Karlis jumped in front of her. "Where are you going?"

Karna's face was deathly pale, but her eyes were hard. "To see my mother."

Tarlana joined Karlis. "Karna, you _can't!_ "

"You might be seen by Father …"

"Why should I _care?_ " Karna exclaimed, starting to cry. "What purpose does my life have if I cannot say good bye to the one person who gave up her life _for me?_ My sisters, I have three people I love in the world and I can hug and kiss both of you. But I _must_ say good bye to her." She choked on her tears. "I can't … I _can't not say good bye_. I have … I have … to hold her, to tell her I love her."

Karlis was crying now. "But Karna. If you are killed, Mother will never forgive herself, it will kill her."

"It will kill me to not say good bye," Karna whispered, suddenly calm. She knew what mattered to her the most and was going to see it through.

She embraced both her sisters and, gently pushing them aside, left the home.

Tarlana was after her in an instant, Karlis close behind. But sudden fear of recognition stopped them from calling after her. In a quick conference, Tarlana followed and Karlis took off at a sprint. She had mentioned running for Ahoz, but she thought that she knew the one person who could get Karna to see sense.

Adrenalin helped Tarlana to keep pace with Karna as her sister strode through the back streets. With her longer legs, she would normally have left her far behind. They moved swiftly but cautiously as they passed known associates and acquaintances of their father.

"You should not be with me, Tarlana," Karna muttered as they passed beneath an archway. She drew her shawl up over her head, seeking to hide her face. "I do not wish you to be hurt."

"Karna I beg you, return with me now before it is too late," Tarlana pleaded. She jumped to the side as a vegetable cart rattled went past. "You can still come back with me."

Karna passed quickly on, heedless of her sister's words.

Tarlana glanced around, realising that they were mere streets from their family home. "Karna. _Please_ my sister. You know Father will be returning any time now from his day's work."

"Then stand watch, Tarlana. You can observe and give us warning when he is returning." Karna's eyes were suddenly bright at this suggestion. "Please, my sister. I just want to say good bye. Can you not understand that?"

Tarlana felt herself crying, "Of course I can Karna. But at the sake of _your life_?"

"I do not think I will have a life when she is gone." Karna's voice was so quiet that Tarlana nearly missed it.

Forcing her horror aside, she made herself to act. "Very well, but you _must_ leave as soon as I come."

Karna kissed her sister's cheek quickly. "I promise, true delight of my eyes. I love you."

Tarlana started to weep freely. "I love you too, my sister. More than I can express."

The sisters shared a quick embrace before hurriedly separating.

* * *

As soon as Tarlana had spoken, Karna had known her course of action. She had no choice. This was _Mother_.

She moved as quickly as she could without making herself conspicuous, though it was difficult with her arm swinging in its sling. She passed beneath an awning and recognised the main street that was parallel to their home's. It was busy with traffic and Karna was able to pass quickly through the amassing crowds, her eyes fixed upon the passageway that would lead to their front door.

Carefully, she ducked past the familiar well and drew her shawl close about her face as she approached _the door._ She saw Maralis' door open and three of the children playing in the street. Not daring to make eye contact, she dived for the door and flung it open, slamming it behind her.

Tamara jumped and hastened to the doorway. She gasped when she saw Karna's familiar form, a thousand questions coming to her tongue. Karna merely nodded before ducking around her and kneeling by her mother's mattress.

It was as bad as she had feared.

Hezal was soaked in sweat. Her face was pale and there was a bowl near her head, filled with water. Several bloodied rags littered the floor. Tarlana had been right. She was close to death.

Gently, Karna took her hand. It felt as frail as a bird's wing.

"Mother." She ran a soft hand through her hair.

Hezal stirred.

"Tarlana?" Her eyes opened a fraction. Recognition dawned and she jerked up in concern. "Karna, my child, what are you doing here? Your step father …"

"I _had_ to see you," Karna stated, her voice choked with tears. "Mother …"

"Peace my daughter." Hezal raised a frail hand to touch her cheek. "Be at peace, oh delight of my eyes."

Karna could only sob and kiss Hezal's cheek. Her mother touched her forehead lightly with her lips and smiled. "All will be well, my Karna."

"Mother, how?" she exclaimed. "I love you … I can't let you go …"

"It is Tash's will, my child. Who are we to question the will of the inexorable, the irresistible one?"

"But … I love you …"

"And I love you. I will be pleased to see your dear father."

Karna could do nothing but sob, burying her face in her mother's blanket. She felt Hezal stroking her hair.

"Karna, you must listen to me." Her daughter raised a tear-stained face. "My love, you must go. Leave Tashbaan."

She started. "Leave my home?"

Hezal nodded. "My child, you no longer belong in Calormen. I have heard you and your sisters speak of this Narnian lord … you must go with him. Go to Narnia and dare to fulfil your dreams, my daughter. Find the happiness you seek … the happiness I could not give you here."

Karna felt the tears falling anew. "Don't speak of such things, Mother. You and my sisters have been my one source of happiness. Who would I be without you? I can't live in a world where you aren't alive."

Her mother was suddenly firm. "Yes you will and you must. Karna, hearken to me. You have always had a curiosity, a fire in you that could not be quenched. Even when faced with the prospect of an unwanted marriage and all its certainty, you stood up to your stepfather and stood by your dreams. You _have_ to go on and live. Promise me that you will live the life that you have dreamed of. If you do … my dreams and hope for you will have been fulfilled."

Karna choked on her tears and desperately clasped her mother's hand, as though holding on for life.

Eventually she found her voice.

"I promise …"

The words had just left her mouth when the door slammed into the wall and Tarlana cried, "Karna you must go now, he is coming!"

Unable to speak, Karna kissed her mother's cheek and stared at her face for a moment, fixing it firmly in her mind.

"I love you," she whispered, before running for her life.

* * *

Author's note:

I know, I know! Hate me all you like but the next chapter is already half written and the good news is that I break up on Wednesday (23rd) so I plan to update hopefully within a week.

Well, what do you guys think of all the drama? I've given both Karna and Peridan a reality check about their feelings now to show where they both are. It's just so new for them both that they are slow on the uptake in that department.

I am sorry to kill off Hezal, she's been a lovely character to write – but I'm afraid she was doomed from the beginning. Her input is kind of vital for a later decision of Karna's … wait and see!

What do we think? I'd love some feedback about the pacing. I included a Karna/Karlis funny conversation because this chapter was a little intense without it!

But what will happen next? I think we might see a knight in shining armour come riding in .

Thank you for all the views, reviews and updates, they mean the world and really do motivate me to get the next up quicker. But I am in the groove now and managed to get this out in two weeks so the end though not that close is getting closer.

Thank you for joining me on this crazy journey with Karna, it's about to get even more dramatic!

Breeze.


	18. The Price of Dreaming

Daring to Dream

Chapter Seventeen

The Price of Dreaming

Karlis ran.

The lower streets of Tashbaan passed in a flurry of dust and bustle as she wove her way swiftly through the crowds. She had one destination in mind and focussed solely upon reaching it. Any other concerns were pushed aside in the pursuit of her goal.

Sooner than she would have thought possible, she entered the cobbled streets of the merchant's quarter. The wider lane was filled with the stalls of cloth and leather traders.

Karlis ducked aside for a cart and pushed her way through the crowds as quickly as she could. She was just passing beneath the archway at the start of the noble quarter when she heard the usual cries of the guides. The nearest was declaring the passing of some military commander.

Carefully, she slipped between a man guiding a mule and a woman carrying a basket of dates, when another voice reached her ears.

"Way! Way for the barbarians of the North! Way for the Narnian lords!"

Karlis found herself pressed to the side of the street as the group passed.

The Calormen guide led the way but was markedly different to his companions, with his dark turban and oiled beard. He even moved in a different manner, with more caution and care.

Karlis marvelled at the ease with which the Narnians moved. They looked about themselves with curiosity and interest, smiling openly. Two men near the back seemed to be sharing a joke and one threw back his head and laughed with such open abandon that Karlis almost found herself wanting to smile with him.

They were soon past and she had not seen a face that she recognised.

Not allowing herself to stop and consider what she did, Karlis plunged on through the crowd, heading straight for Master Tirshan's house.

It felt odd as she approached the familiar entrance and slipped through. But instead of heading right as she had done so many times before, she now headed left to the guest wing.

Fear slowed her feet as she headed towards the rooms and uncertainty gripped her mind. She had been so focussed on her journey here that she now stopped to think.

 _Where would she even find Lord Peridan?_

It was one thing to speak openly with a stranger in your own home. It was quite another to step boldly up to their very door and demand to speak to them.

Karlis dithered in the dark corridor for a full minute, willing herself to continue. She might have remained there for much longer had it not been for a familiar voice calling her name.

"Karlis?"

The young woman jumped as she turned to find Lamarla approaching her. Fear was replaced with relief.

"What are you doing here? Isn't your mother ill?"

Karlis forced herself to speak. "She is, she's dying. But Lamarla, I need your help. Do you know where Lord Peridan is?"

"Who?"

"The Narnian lord. He's was the head of the earlier delegation and sat with Karna during the feast."

"The one who is slightly taller than the others, with hair the colour of sand?"

Karlis nodded in relief. "Yes. A party of Narnians passed me in the street but he was not among them."

"He must be in their private parlour with the queen. Come."

Lamarla ushered her friend along, not stopping to question why she wished to speak with a visiting lord. Karlis followed quickly behind her and all too soon, they were standing before a door of the first floor.

Lamarla turned to go, "Do it quickly," she advised. "You must not be caught."

Karlis nodded and knocked twice before she could hesitate. The door was opened by a small man, about half the size of a human, with a long brown beard.

"Yes?" he enquired.

She forced herself to speak. "May I please speak to Lord Peridan?"

The small man blinked in surprise and nodded. "Please wait here," he said.

He disappeared for about thirty seconds, though the time felt like a full day to Karlis as she waited.

The door was suddenly opened then and Peridan stood before her. His expression was wild with curiousity.

"Karlis?" he exclaimed. "What are you doing here? Please, come in."

He ushered the young woman in and she instantly poured out her story.

"I am sorry for coming, my lord. But I had to! Our mother is dying and Karna was desperate to see her. Tarlana came to my home and told us. Karna became distraught and would not be consoled. She kissed us both and hurried off to say her farewells. My lord Peridan, she's there at this very moment and if my father returns …"

"By the mane …" he clasped a hand to his mouth. "If your father sees her..."

"Yes, my lord, if my father sees her, he will kill her. If he knows that she still lives he will not stop until he has avenged his public humiliation."

The Narnian lord nodded. "We must leave immediately. If we can reach her in time …"

"Peridan, what is it? Who is going to be killed?"

Karlis spun and felt her insides contract. Seated upon chairs not fifteen feet from her, were the Narnian king and queen, among others. The golden haired king was speaking and had risen from his seat. The queen too was sitting forward, her lovely face concerned.

Karlis bowed deeply and prostrated herself upon the floor. "Please forgive me, my lord," she began. "I have no right to stand in the presence of such …"

"Please, Miss," the queen rose and actually knelt beside her. She raised her to kneeling with a gently touch on her arm. "Never prostrate yourself before us in such a manner. You are Peridan's friend and are welcome in our rooms."

The young woman gaped at the beautiful queen. It was incomprehensible to her that this exquisite, graceful woman of royal blood should kneel beside a dusty peasant girl, dressed in her silk gown and smelling as though she had bathed in roses.

The king was quick to add his assurances. "The queen is right. Please, Miss, seat yourself and take refreshment. You look exhausted by the sun. Broggin, of your courtesy, would you fetch our visitor a drink?"

The smaller man bowed and moved toward a refreshment table as Karlis was led towards the sofa by the queen. She was not allowed to speak until she had drained a glass of iced sherbet.

She didn't have words to describe that drink. It both cooled and quenched her parched throat, allowing her to calm her nerves and collect her rattled senses.

They all waited for her to finish before Peridan spoke. "Queen Susan, King Edmund, may I introduce Mistress Karlis of Tashbaan to you. She is the younger sister of the young lady I sat next to at our welcome banquet, Miss Karna."

They both inclined their heads. King Edmund's expression held something more, a deeper comprehension than his sister. He drew a greater significance from her presence than the queen.

"I beg your majesties' pardon for invading your private rooms. I would not have done so under any circumstances less serious," Karlis' voice shook slightly but was resolute.

They both nodded.

The king spoke. "Lord Peridan has told us of your sister's situation, Mistress Karlis. We completely understand the urgency."

"We are so very sorry to hear about your mother," the queen interjected.

Karlis nodded and bowed her head as tears threatened.

Peridan rose. "If Mistress Karlis is feeling recovered, we must leave immediately."

Karlis snapped back to reality and felt her heart lurch as she remembered Karna's predicament. "Yes." She bowed to the king and queen. "I thank you most sincerely for your hospitality and welcome, your majesties," she said. "It has been an honour to meet you."

After a hasty farewell, she and Peridan left the home quickly and were soon hurrying through the streets. Neither knew whether they would be in time.

* * *

From his boyhood, Tarneesh had known and understood his place in life. He had learnt his trade from his father, as his father had learnt it from his. He in his turn had taught his two sons the art of carpentry and had imparted the necessary wisdom about what to expect from life. It was a pattern that he knew and understood.

But when he had returned one day to find his wife gravely ill, it had shaken him more than he had expected.

He had never loved his wife. He'd never expected to.

However, after having lived with the same woman for over half his life, even he could not deny the connection and comfortable sense of companionship they had shared. He knew that he would miss her if she died and this in itself was surprising to the apathetic carpenter.

Tarneesh was not given to great thought, but even he had considered his marriage with pleasure upon occasion. Hezal and he had been a suitable partnership from the beginning. He knew that he would miss her calm and steadying presence in his home.

It was for this reason that he allowed Tarlana to remain home from work and nurse her ill mother. Yet even he had been forced to concede the hopelessness of the situation that morning.

He had left for work, knowing that his wife might not be alive when he returned. But mouths needed feeding and without the selling of that week's carvings, they could never hope to pay for a funeral.

Andur and Kanzeesh had followed their father as usual, but without their usual squabbling. They had been silent and morose throughout the market, taking money for carvings without comment. They had not even badgered him for a few coins for ale, as was their usual habit after a successful day of selling.

The three men made their way home with the silence they had maintained all day. It was only once they had left the market that Kanzeesh spoke up.

"Father?"

Tarneesh turned. "Yes, my son?"

"Do you suppose we will find our mother living when we return?"

Tarneesh sighed and continued his walk. "My son. As the poet has said, the sun rises and falls and we rise and fall with it. I do not know if we will find your mother living. But remember also as another has said, that as the sun rises and falls, so also does the need for food never wain, nor can work ever cease. You will one day face such another day when you have a wife and you must remember to keep working that day as we have done this day. In the name of Tash (may He be praised) so passes the way of the world."

His eldest son nodded and they continued in their walk until they came to the end of their alley. Tarneesh was just turning when he spotted a figure emerging from his home.

He watched the figure carefully for a full half minute before the truth dawned. Tall, thin and definitely female, she had chanced one glance in their direction before running in the opposite direction.

All thought of his dying wife was lost in a minute as blinding rage filled Tarneesh's mind.

" _You!"_ he bellowed.

He dropped his bundle of carvings and was off in a minute, heedless of his astonished sons left far behind as he chased after _her_. The bastard he had raised and fed for sixteen years. The wretched creature who had publicly humiliated him, not just in front of his family and neighbours, but actually in front of the elders.

He had thought she was dead. He had been sure than none could survive after the beating he had given her that night. But somehow, she had.

Tarneesh didn't think of anything but revenge as he ran through the streets, desperately trying to keep up with the retreating figure. He knew that she was wearing a faded red dress and had noticed that she had pulled a brown shawl over her head when she fled.

He tracked her along three streets until the crowd began to thicken.

Furiously, he pushed past carts, stall holders, mules, street urchins, men and women alike in his pursuit of his prey. The figure was ducking and bobbing around the crowd with desperation as she tried to keep away from him.

They passed through two more streets and were half way across the fish market before Tarneesh got caught up in a passing stream of humanity. Pushed and pulled from multiple sides, he had to take his eyes off her for a few moments to elbow his way through a passing herd of sheep. After exchanging a few well-chosen phrases with the shepherd, he looked up and saw a sea of brown coats and shawls heading in every direction.

Tarneesh yelled in frustration and smashed a carving to the ground.

In his rage, he roared across the square.

"If I _ever_ see you again I will _kill_ _you bastard!_ "

A few passers-by stared at the carpenter but quickly passed on. One furious glance from Tarneesh was enough to show any that this was not a man to quarrel with.

Down an alley on the opposite side of the square, sheltered by a tall refuse pile, a single Calormen maid drew her brown shawl over her face and sobbed from terror and relief.

Somehow, she had survived.

Darkness had fallen by the time she dared to move. She had sat, slumped and silent behind the refuse pile for a long time, listening to the heavy thumping of her heart. Her mind was awhirl after the events of that day.

Had she really been sitting, bored but content with Karlis that very morning?

Now, she had run away from her only safe haven, said good bye to her mother forever and run for her life.

Where could she go?

Karna had pondered this question for hours. Thought after thought had chased each other through her mind, each more hopeless than the last.

Return to Karlis and Ahoz's home?

Not safe now that Tarnessh knew she was alive.

Try to find another job?

No-one would give her work without a reference and wanting to know far too much about her family history.

Leave Tashbaan?

And go where? Where did she have to go? Who did she know outside of this city?

No-one.

The truth was that Tashbaan was the only home she had ever known. Certainly, she could dream to far off green lands and their magical deities … but what did she know of them? What would she ever know?

Unwanted, her mother's words filled her head:

"Go to Narnia and dare to fulfil your dreams, my daughter. Find the happiness you seek … the happiness I could not give you here."

 _Go to Narnia?_

Karna scoffed and pushed the idea aside as she wrapped her shawl more tightly around her.

What had her dreams ever got her but heart break and pain? Yes, she had dreamed of going to the mythical land of Narnia, but when did dreams ever come true? Had her dreams been able to save Mother?

Slowly, tears started to fall down her cheeks and she didn't bother to wipe them away.

What was the point? Why had she run from Tarneesh? Why hadn't she let him kill her? It would have all been so much simpler if she had.

Eventually, Karna let the exhaustion take her and fell into an exhausted sleep.

 _It was dark._

 _Above her the sky was prickly with stars, but they were sometimes blocked by a branch as she made her was forwards._

 _At least, she assumed they were branches. She was passing tree after tree as she moved onwards through this place._

 _Though she had never seen one, Karna thought this might be a forest._

 _Her mother had once told a story about a creature that lived in a forest called a dryad._

 _Hezal had described how there were thousands of trees, all different types, shapes and sizes. Sometimes they had grown so close together that the sky could hardly be seen. Within each, there had dwelt these spirits. The heart of the forest she had called them._

 _Karna wasn't sure why, but she kept moving onwards. She passed the silvery branches of one and was just reaching out to touch a silken leaf when she first heard it._

 _Clear, merry and bright. The sound of a bird's morning call, welcoming the coming of a new day. She noticed the paling of the night as the first grey light of dawn started to filter through the canopy._

 _Again the bird's high whistle reached her ears and she turned to follow the sound. Eventually she found the bird. A small, dark creature with a glossy plumage and small, jewel-bright eyes. It sat on a lower branch and sang merrily._

 _She didn't know how long she stood and listened. But it seemed to be much lighter when she eventually turned at the sound of a snapping branch._

 _A gasp escaped from her mouth._

 _He was standing thirty feet away. Tall, powerful and beautiful._

 _A lion._

 _No, the lion._

 _Even in the pale light, his fur shone as though lit by the sun. He was more breath-taking and terrifying than she could express._

 _Soundlessly he made his way across the clearing towards her. His tread was sure and he never blinked, his gaze locked with her._

 _Karna's heart beat painfully against her chest._

 _He stopped ten feet away and sat down. Simply watching her._

" _Are you he, sir?" her voice was a thread of sound._

" _I am."_

" _You are the one they worship?"_

 _He nodded._

" _Sir …" She hesitated._

" _Speak, child."_

" _Why do I not know you?"_

" _But you do, Karna, my daughter."_

" _How do I know you?"_

" _You have been seeking me all your life. Though you did not know it."_

" _Are you … are you Aslan?"_

" _I am."_

 _She heard the blackbird once more and remembered where she was. "Do you know why I dream of this place, sir?"_

 _He nodded. "It is your heart's desire, my daughter."_

" _Where are we?"_

" _This is Narnia."_

 _Karna felt her heart thrill strangely. "Narnia?"_

" _Indeed."_

" _Please?"_

" _Ask, my child."_

" _Why am I here? Why am I dreaming of you and this place? I know I will never come here."_

" _How do you know, child?"_

" _Sir, my dreams of this place, of you, have brought me nothing. My mother …" Her voice broke and she felt herself falling to her knees._

 _Tears fell freely down her cheeks. She buried her head in her hands and wept. She did not know for how long but she felt something rough gently nudge her hands. She looked up and saw that the lion had nudged her hands apart. He licked her tears away with a soft tongue and breathed into her face._

 _It was not the rancid breath one might expect from a lion, but sweet. Instantly. Karna felt her breathing calm and stood to look him full in the face. His eyes were sad and yet, also filled with love._

 _Karna's eyes widened as she grasped the truth of that look. Love for_ _ **her**_ _._

" _Take heart my daughter, you will find the joy that you seek. But also know that the path to joy will be wracked with great sorrow."_

 _As he said the words, Karna felt as though she had heard them before … and then she knew._

" _You spoke to me in the garden," she stated. "You were warning me of this … you knew my mother was going to die … but why? How could you allow this to happen if you love us?"_

 _The lion did not speak, nor did the sadness in his expression change._

" _My daughter, I cannot change what has happened, but I can give you a hope."_

 _She stared._

" _You will see her again, and you will find the joy you seek, though it seems far off. Please, trust in me."_

 _He breathed upon her once more and she felt her heart lighten. If he said that she would see her mother again, then she would._

" _But where can I go? I haven't got a home anymore."_

 _He simply looked at her before the words once more filled her mind, "Trust in me."_

Karna jerked awake. She was sitting on the floor of a dirty alley next to the fish market, hidden from view by a rubbish pile. Her arm throbbed and she didn't doubt that she smelt awful.

She stood carefully and at once knew what she had to do. She would go to the only friends she had left.

She would go to the Narnians.

* * *

Author's note:

Apologies for the delayed update. I had my first case of writer's block but I managed to get back into my grove and remember my characters. I am sure a few of you will need to re-read to remind yourselves what happened last and I apologise.

This chapter was far harder to write than I expected – all because of Tarneesh! One thing I have tried to do all the way through is give a balanced portrayal of the Calormene characters and explain why they feel justified in acting as they do. Tarneesh's rage was very hard to write and took major redrafts to complete!

I've also learnt that from being terrified of writing her, I now rather like writing Susan! Anyway, on to the next stage – Karna is finally joining the Narnians! (Or is she ..?)

Thank you so much for your patience. I am now back at work so fortnightly/three week updates should be expected.

Please read and review, your comments really motivate me!

Thank you to meldahlie, Kigharrah and anyabar for reviewing, you guys are amazing and they mean so much!

Thanks again,

Breeze.


	19. The Truth of Hidden Emotion

Daring to Dream

Chapter Eighteen

The Truth of Hidden Emotions

It was only once they had reached the now familiar archway leading into the merchants' quarter that Peridan was struck by something.

This was the third time in two weeks that he had rushed to Karna's aid.

Unbidden, Marken's words came back to him.

" _What about this Calormene girl has inspired such loyalty?"_

It had been the day of Susan and Edmund's arrival. Marken had been driven to distraction by the obsequious fawning of Madame Abilene and had demanded to know why Peridan had abandoned his duties in order to help this apparently ordinary Calormene servant girl.

At the time, he had swept his motivations aside as immediate action had been required.

Now … here he was once more heading to the poor quarter, regardless of the offence he might be causing their hosts or the danger he might be putting himself in.

But then, the king and queen had both agreed that urgent action was required. They had supported his decision to help …

So why was he questioning his motives? Was he not acting as any knight would, in rushing to help those in need?

But why _her?_

From the first moment he had seen her, Karna had stood out to him, and not for obvious reasons. In a group of beautiful, sensually dressed young women, it had been her innocence and fixed smile that had struck him. Then they had met and her curiosity had fascinated him.

Instead of flattering and flirting with him as most Calormen noblewomen he had met, she had asked questions and being so obviously enraptured by the stories of Narnia. He would never had believed that such appreciation for life and spirit could come from such poverty and hardship.

Then, regardless of her life's difficulties, Karna had refused to accept a humdrum and safe existence in favour of her dreams. Of course, she could be stubborn to the point of futility, but with that obstinacy came a fierce love and loyalty for those she cared about. A devotion that would lead her to risk her own life …

Peridan swallowed hard and forced himself to focus upon the matter at hand. They were drawing close to the dwelling and Karlis urged him to seat himself within a dark corner.

"Please keep your hood up until I return, my lord," she stated. "I will be as swift as I can. I will say I have come to enquire after my mother's health."

She bobbed him a quick curtsey before hurrying away. Peridan kept his sword out but safely covered by a fold of his cloak, ready and alert for danger.

It seemed as though she was gone for hours, though it could not have been above fifteen minutes. Peridan tried to remain alert for every sound, but he could not help his thoughts once more returning to Karna.

 _Why was he so concerned for her welfare?_

If he was being brutally honest with himself, he knew that his interest could not be excused as the concern of a knight for one in need. Marken had been right. There were a hundred such cases of abused daughters in this huge city … so _why_ did he dread the time when they might leave …?

Peridan shuddered at the thought and thrust it aside.

He had to face reality …

He cared for Karna.

And it was not the way he cared for Susan or Lucy or any of the other women he had befriended in his life.

If he was being honest, he knew that he had never felt the way for any woman that he now felt for Karna. Had not Edmund said as much?

But how much did he care for her? Certainly enough to drop everything and rush to her protection when her life was threatened.

A memory stirred and he found himself remembering the feel of her cheek. Just one touch, but he had been unable to stop himself.

Her eyes. They transfixed him. Her beautiful, dark eyes that had looked at him with such trust and gratitude.

What would he not do for her?

Peridan swallowed hard and forced his mind back to the present. He didn't even know if she lived … but she _must_. Surely he would know if she had … died?

A cold fear stabbed his heart.

If he had doubted before, Peridan knew what he felt in that moment.

A sudden movement caught his eye and he spun, blade raised.

Karlis stood before him, smaller and more delicate, but almost the twin of her sister in facial expression. Her cheeks were streaked with tears but her eyes were bright.

"My … my lord Peridan, Karna lives."

Peridan released a breath he had not known he was holding.

"Did your father see her?"

"Yes, but she fled and managed to escape. Tarlana and I believe that she must have fled to Master Tirshan's house. There is nowhere else for her to have gone …" Her voice shook and Peridan saw the tears start to flow freely as she choked out the words. "My … my lord … I cannot come with you. Please … please tell Karna that we love her. But we have to think of our family. My moth … my mother is d-dead …"

She started to sob and buried her face in her hands. Peridan stood and was about to urge her to seat herself when the young woman regained her composure.

"My lord Peridan. I love my sister so much, but we cannot help her. Our father is still ignorant of the role we played in her escape. Tell her … tell her I am so very sorry but we can do nothing more. We have to keep living and if our part was ever discovered …"

The Narnian lord places a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"Mistress Karlis," he stated. "Anyone who has seen you cannot doubt the love that you share with your sisters. I understand and so will Karna. Please, rest assured that I _will_ keep her safe."

The young woman returned his gaze directly for the first time. Her eyes were very like Karna's, large and dark and showing every emotion of her soul.

"Please take care of her," she implored. "Tell her we love her and love her for us, my lord. I can see that you do, even if she or even you don't know it yet."

Peridan stared at this young Calormen woman.

She was an illiterate peasant girl, raised to fulfil one role in life … and yet she had seen plainly the truth which had eluded him. He, an educated and learned diplomat had missed the simple truth … that he was starting to fall in love.

He gaped at her for a full minute without moving.

Karlis regarded him gravelly before she reached up to kiss his cheek.

"Good bye, my brother."

She whispered these parting words before hurrying away.

Peridan was left in a tumult of emotion.

He remained there long after she had disappeared into her father's dwelling. His mind was awhirl, overwhelmed and momentarily incapable of rational thought.

Eventually, a loud horn blasted, announcing the closing of the city gates. Peridan jerked back to reality and realised that darkness had fallen.

Urgently, he drew up his hood and hurried back to the house. If he was not quick, he might miss Karna all together when she came seeking shelter. The thought of her being alone in the city at night and unprotected was unthinkable.

He entered the familiar street that led to Master Tirshan's house and sighed gratefully when he found no beggars waiting at the door. It was not an unusual occurrence for them to come seeking food or even respite from the danger of the streets.

Peridan knocked loudly and an angry voice asked,

"Who goes there?"

"Lord Peridan of Narnia."

The door swung open and a stooped figure peered out. Peridan lowered his hood and made eye contact with the old door keeper.

"Good evening Grushta," he said with a nod. The doorman bowed deeply, his voice dropping to a sycophantic purr.

"Good evening, my Lord Peridan. You are late tonight."

"I had business in the city. Might I enquire whether any young women have come calling tonight?"

The door keeper arched a curious bushy eye brow. "A young woman, my lord?"

"Yes, a tall, thin maiden wearing a red dress and brown shawl. Have any answering that description sought entry?"

Grushta leered conspiratorially. "No, my lord, but I shall be certain to grant her admittance when she does arrive. I had wondered when your barbarian lordships might be seeking such _company._ "

Peridan grabbed the door keeper roughly and slammed him against the wall. " _How_ _dare you insinuate such a thing!_ " he bellowed. "Get your mind out of the sewer, vermin and do not dare to ever think such a thing again about _any_ Narnian! Do you understand me?"

He thrust the door keeper against the wall once more for emphasis.

Grushta was instantly contrite, bowing to the floor and almost crying from fear. "Forgive me. Please forgive me, your honoured lordship. I meant no offense to yourself or the young lady."

Peridan forced himself to take several long breaths before he spoke. "Just see that the door is opened if she arrives," he stated. "I do not know how much longer I will be out. Remain alert for my return."

The door keeper bowed once more before Peridan heard the door slam shut behind him.

Unable to repress a shudder of disgust at the man's assertion, he moved to sit in the shadow of a nearby doorway. Once he had approved his vantage point, he kept his sword balanced upon his lap and pondered Grushta's train of thought.

The very idea that he might have invited such a woman back to the residence of his king and _queen_? Peridan winced, revolted by the idea.

He was not naïve. He knew that such practises took place in countries outside of Narnia. But the thought that the doorkeeper could believe such a thing of him …?

He wasn't sure whether he was more disgusted or angry.

In the end, he didn't have to wait very long. He couldn't have been sitting in the doorway for longer than five minutes when he saw a dark figure cautiously moving along the opposite wall. The size and shape were right for Karna, though the head was covered.

Peridan decided to act. He rose and approached.

"Karna?"

The figure turned to him.

"My lord Peridan?" The voice shook and he recognised it as Karna's. Though it was too dark to see her face.

Relief hurried his steps as he reached her. It was only when he did that he realised she was visibly shaking.

"My … my lord I am so very sorry, but I … I didn't know where to go … my _mother."_

Peridan simply drew the young woman into his arms and held her. He felt every tremor that rocked her slim frame as she sobbed upon his shoulder.

"Karna I am so very sorry. So very sorry for your loss."

He gently stroked her long hair, cradling her as she wept.

A week ago, such an action would have been inconceivable to Peridan. But in that moment he knew that it was the only thing that he could have done.

He only let go when her tears had stilled and she was calm. When he did, they were both slightly embarrassed. Karna drew in a shuddering breath and Peridan forced himself to speak.

"We must get out of the street, Karna. It is not safe to remain here. Come."

He knocked once and hurried her through, past the lowered eyes of the doorkeeper and into the main house. It was not until they were installed in a small antechamber that he allowed himself to speak.

"Karna, I cannot imagine what you have gone through today. Your sister came to find me and we went in pursuit. We thought you would be identified by your stepfather."

She flushed and nodded. "I am sorry, I never meant to cause anyone worry. But the thought of never seeing my mother again was just impossible, my lord…"

She felt the tears once more threatening and allowed Peridan to lead her to a sofa. He did not permit her to speak until she had taken a long sip of lemonade.

"I understand," he assured her, taking a seat nearby. "I would have done the same thing. Your sister and I were just relieved that he never caught you."

Karna nodded, embarrassed by the trouble she had caused.

"I am so sorry …" she began.

Peridan held up a hand. "Please don't apologise. It is enough to see that you are alive and safe." His expression softened. "Karna, know that you are safe now. I promised Mistress Karlis that I would never let any harm befall you and I intend to keep my word."

Karna felt tears pricking her eyes, though she was not sure whether from relief or pain.

Suddenly she felt tired, exhausted and in pain. Her arm throbbed and her head was pounding. She leant wearily back against the sofa.

Peridan was instantly contrite.

"I'm sorry, you must be exhausted." He rose quickly and headed for the door. "I will send someone to watch over you. Please do not fear, none but I have access to this room. You can rest at ease."

Karna nodded and allowed herself to relax. "My lord …"

Peridan turned.

"I do not know how to thank you for your kindness to me. I have no idea what I would have done if you hadn't …"

"Listen to me, Karna and heed my words. I promise you, no-one will ever hurt you again. Don't be afraid, you have friends and people who care about you … _deeply._ "

He was never sure whether Karna heard this last phrase because her eyes had closed. But whether she had heard or not, Peridan determined to show her that care in every way that he could.

* * *

As she had drawn steadily nearer to Master Tirshan's house, Karna had found her certainty of welcome fading with every step until she stopped and dawdled in the next street for a long time. She had experienced every emotion that day from the agony of loss to the terror of fearing for her life to the physical pain of her arm. By the time she reached the street by the house she found herself exhausted, grieving and terrified about her future.

 _Why would the Narnians want to help her?_

Fear and hope chased each other through her mind as she tried to deduce the next sensible course of action.

In the end her apprehension grew so great that she forced herself to move from the fear that she would remain in that spot all night. So she had moved.

Cautiously she had clung to the wall, trying to think of a way to gain entry besides the main guarded door. Then she had heard her name being called and turned to find Lord Peridan striding towards her.

The relief had proven too much to handle. She been unable to utter a coherent sentence as her emotions had overwhelmed her and she had burst into tears.

The next moment, she had found herself held in the strongest, safest embrace of her life.

Karna had never been held in such a manner.

No father had ever gathered her close when she was upset. No brother had ever lifted her away from danger. The only hugs and touches she had ever known had come from her mother and sisters. Even these had been exchanged in secret, away from the disapproving gaze of Calormen society.

She had never known the feeling of being held securely in a man's arms, of actually being cradled. Karna had nothing to compare the feel of Peridan's arms around her to. All she knew was that in that moment, she knew that she never wanted to leave.

For the first time in weeks, months or maybe even years, she felt properly safe.

This man did not tell her to pull herself together, to stop crying and showing weakness. He simply held her, condoling with her pain and offering the only comfort he could. It soothed and helped her to calm more quickly.

Of course, once she was composed they both blushed at the impropriety of such an embrace. But Karna could not find it within her to regret it. On the contrary, this man had not only comforted her but was now offering his protection. How could she regret the acceptance of his kindness?

Once they were within the house and a small room she recognised as Peridan's private study, Karna realised the folly of her actions that day. Again her stubbornness had nearly gotten her injured. Yet at the same time she knew that she would never have acted differently. Even to save her life.

She would always be able to hold on to those precious final words from her mother. And she knew she would treasure them.

Karna listened to Peridan's assurances of safety with gratitude, but found the right words hard to find as her weariness started to take hold. It was only after she had allowed her eyes to close that she thought she heard him mention something about people caring deeply …

This was Karna's last thought for quite some time.

She slept the exhausted slumber of one who has experienced too much and can only seek healing in rest.

When she did eventually awake feeling refreshed, daylight was streaming through the small window and someone was watching her. Alarm quickly turned to relief as she recognised Timeon's lined face.

"Master Timeon, I am so pleased to see you!" she said, moving to a sitting position.

The older man smiled gravelly as he offered her a glass of orange juice.

"My dear young woman," he replied, "you have faced more hardship in the past month than some face in a life time. I was so very sorry to hear about your mother."

Karna accepted the drink gratefully, wanting to focus on anything but her loss. It was chilled with ice and quenched her parched throat like rain in the desert. She drained it is one gulp and thankfully accepted a top-up from a jug.

"How long have you been here?" she asked.

"Lord Peridan asked me to watch over you after you came in last night," he replied. "It was a pleasure to see you get a good night's rest."

"Thank you. I think this is the most rested I have felt in weeks."

Timeon smiled. "I am glad. How is your arm?"

Karna tested it. "Still tender, but the strapping has helped to keep it relatively stable."

The next few minutes were spent in the checking of her arm. The healer did not say much, but he seemed please.

"Healing well," he stated after it had been carefully secured once more. "Though I would not make running a habit, Miss Karna. The arm is jostled far too much with such activity."

She ducked her head. "I know. I am sorry, but I am sure you understand the need?"

Timeon nodded. "Lord Peridan has filled me in on what occurred."

Karna felt herself reddening. "Do you think me stubborn and reckless?"

The older man sighed. "I think passionate and motivated might be a better choice of words, but I won't deny that you were foolish, Karna."

The girl blushed slightly from shame as he continued. "I know you loved your mother very much Karna. But with such passion come carelessness. You were lucky to escape alive last night, especially after all the care that has been taken of you."

It was strange. Karna had been scolded and punished by her stepfather all her life. Yet she had remained untouched by every word and slap she had received at Tarneesh's hand. However, Timeon's words cut her to the core and caused tears of regret to sting her eyes. She _knew_ she had been reckless and things could have turned out so very differently.

"I am sorry," she stated, fresh tears staining her cheeks. "I've always been impetuous. It just never caused any real harm until recently. It was only ever I who suffered for it."

The older man smiled sadly and patted her hand.

"As long as you learn from your mistakes, that is the main thing lass," he said. "And you can also rest assured that you never have to see your stepfather again."

Karna felt her calm returning and was just about to speak when a loud knocking on the door made her jump. Timeon rose and opened it carefully. He stuck his head through the gap and huffed.

"You were told that you were not permitted to enter this room, your highness."

"But why has Lord Peridan cancelled our sword training session?" demanded a young voice.

Karna sat up in surpise, it was the last tone of voice she expected. A boy's voice.

"You know that Lord Peridan was called away on urgent business."

"And he returned with a guest. Grushta the door keeper told me just ten minutes ago. Can I meet her?"

"The lady is tired, your highness."

"Then I expect an early morning walk will do her good."

Karna saw the door being pushed and the next moment a young boy had ducked under Timeon's arm and was regarding her with open curiosity. He was about twelve years old with bright blond hair and curious eyes that were somewhere between green and grey. His expression was open and friendly in the way that only a child's can be.

He smiled to her and gave a neat bow.

"Good morning, my lady. I am Prince Corin of Archenland. Might I escort you round the garden for a stroll? It is a beautiful morning."

Karna was so charmed by the young prince that she actually laughed. Timeon strode over with a rueful smile.

"I apologise for the intrusion, Miss Karna. His young highness should know better."

Karna stood and curtseyed to the prince. "Please do not apologise Master Timeon, his highness has quite charming manners. I am Miss Karna of Tashbaan, your highness. In the name of Tash, the inexorable, the irresistible, it is a pleasure to make your acquaintance."

Corin shot Timeon what could only be described as a smug look before repeating his offer of the stroll.

"Miss Karna has not even broken her fast, my prince," Timeon objected.

The boy nodded. "Then we shall breakfast in the garden. I shall see to it, Master Timeon, please do not trouble yourself."

The healer pursed his lip but did not scold as he might have done. "I will take care of the meal but please be sure to stroll in the private garden _only_ , Prince Corin. We do not wish for our guest's presence to be known by the entire household."

Though Corin's curiosity was evidently piqued, he merely nodded and offered Karna his arm.

Despite herself, Karna was charmed by the boy and took it as decorously as though they were strolling through the palace gardens.

Once they were away from Timeon the prince instantly piped up.

"I know that you being here is meant to be a secret and I want you to know that I am an _excellent_ secret keeper."

"Oh?" Karna queried.

The prince nodded. "Oh yes. I've kept many a secret from Father and the staff at home. I'm the best secret keeper in Anvard."

"Anvard?"

"It's my home back in Archenland. My father's castle."

"I see. What sorts of secrets have you kept, my young lord?"

"Mistakes and accidents caused by the adults mostly. Although there was one time when I saw father's butler taking a whole tray of buns for the cook's pantry …"

Corin kept his chatter up all the way through the house until they had reached the shelter of the house's private garden. It was shaded, pleasant and only overlooked from two windows. Karna could understand why Timeon had suggested it.

The boy saw her comfortably installed on a stone bench and then left, promising to order her "something good" for breakfast.

Karna was just laughing to herself at the boy's enthusiasm when she saw Peridan watching her from the steps. He had a wistful smile on his face and seemed happy about something. She instantly rose to curtsey.

"My lord Peridan!"

He raised her quickly.

"Please do not bow to me, Karna. You need to rest and heal."

"How can I do anything but honour you for what you have done for me, my lord?"

Peridan shook his head and urged her back into her seat.

"Please do not thank me. I would do it again in a heartbeat."

Karna's heart fluttered strangely. "You would?"

"Of course. How could I let you get hurt?"

"My lord, it isn't your duty to protect me."

He was quiet for a long moment before he spoke. "Maybe not. But I promised your sisters that I would take care of you and I plan to fulfil that promise in any way I can, Karna."

He had taken a seat next to her and there was little space between them.

She stared at him. His eyes were a similar shade to Corin's, that strange greeny-grey. Though his were closer to green. They were warm and so earnest that she could not doubt his words.

"But why?" The question was out before she could stop herself. "Why would you make a promise to protect me, my lord?"

"Karna, don't you know?" The words had escaped from Peridan's mouth before he could stop them. "Can't you see why I have done everything I have done since I first met you?"

Karna stared, unable to form a response. Peridan registered her shock and looked away, struggling to find the words.

"I only realised myself yesterday what I had grown to feel … what I …"

He looked at her once more. "Karna I …"

"My Lord Peridan!" They both jumped apart as Prince Corin came bounding down the steps. Karna turned her face to hide the blush, whilst Peridan stood, angrily facing the boy.

"Prince Corin you cannot jump out at people in that manner. You quite frightened Miss Karna."

The boy paused, his faced crumpling. "I only wished to say that I got Cook to promise he would make a special treat for me this morning," he mumbled.

Karna's heart gave a small lurch. "It was an accident, my lord," she urged. "No harm was done and I am looking forward to trying this treat, Prince Corin."

She stood and went to the boy. Corin grinned toothily up at her, earning a reluctant chuckle from Peridan.

"I suppose I cannot blame you for dreadful timing, your highness," he admitted. "But learn that it is better to announce your presence in future rather than simply charging in."

* * *

The rest of the morning passed in a pleasant haze for Karna as she strolled in the garden with the irrepressible Corin and experienced one of the most luxurious breakfasts of her life. She was just considering another rest when Peridan came to tell her that a bath had been drawn for her.

Karna stared. "Truly, my lord?"

Peridan smiled at her disbelief. "Truly. I ordered one for myself and thought you would appreciate a wash; though Timeon asks you to keep your arm out of the water."

Karna nodded and followed him to a bathing chamber that she had cleaned so many times. Cautiously she removed her dirty red dress, suddenly aware of its shabby state. She would need a new dress soon though she didn't know where she would find the material.

With a sigh she folded it carefully upon a chair and lowered herself into the sweet smelling water. She had never had a bath and found the whole experience overwhelming. For the first time in her life she used expensive soap and oils. She even bathed her hair with the provided shampoo.

Once finished she rose and wrapped herself in one of the linen towels that she had often washed and hung to dry. She was just reaching for a comb when there was a light knock upon the door. Alarmed, she drew her towel more tightly about her.

"Lord Peridan?" she queried nervously.

A gentle voice answered. "No Miss, Lord Peridan sent me, may I come in? My name is Flora."

Karna assented and watched the young woman entered. She vaguely recognised her as Queen Susan's maid. She was smaller than Karna but had a merry, friendly face.

"Lord Peridan explained your predicament, Miss Karna and asked whether I might have a dress you could borrow? I'm afraid it might be a little short but I think it will fit you well enough."

She held up a blue gown and smiled.

"No, I thank you, Flora. But I couldn't wear your dress."

The young woman would not be refused. "It really isn't any bother and by the look of your red dress, it will be needed. Unless of course, you wish to remain in that towel."

Karna stared at the maid and couldn't help laughing. "I thank you. I would be grateful to have something to change into."

Flora nodded and smiled. "Excellent. Well you go and try it on behind that screen. His lordship has also asked me to help deal with your hair. He has a visitor for lunch who he wishes you to meet."

"A visitor? What visitor?"

Flora shrugged. "I'm not sure, Miss. I believe it is a Tarkheena."

"But why would he wish to introduce me to a Tarkheena?"

"I don't know, Miss. But you had better change quickly. You don't want to keep them waiting."

Karna nodded and hurried behind the screen. She felt overwhelmed by the speed with which things were occurring that morning. Who else was she to meet?

The dress did fit well enough, though the neckline sagged a little and it was a little short. It was made of a soft, cotton material that felt feather-light against her skin. Flora helped her comb and neatly braid her hair back once she had come out from behind the screen.

"Flora, what has Lord Peridan told you about me? Is it not strange for him to have a Calormene guest?"

The young woman shrugged. "I know enough, Miss Karna. He saved your life and has brought you here for safety. We all trust Lord Peridan's judgement. There's no finer judge of character. He trusts you and so we all do. That's all I need to know."

Karna listened in surprise. What must it be like to live in a society where people are able to trust each other so implicitly and not doubt intentions?

"That's you done, Miss," Flora said kindly. "It was nice to meet you."

"And you Flora," Karna replied with a smile. "I am grateful for your help."

The young maid led Karna to dining parlour and left her with a quick curtsey. She stood before the door for a moment before gathering her courage and knocking.

"Come in." She entered the bright chamber and was welcomed by Peridan's smile.

"Miss Karna, may I introduce her ladyship Tarkheena Menelay of Tashbaan."

Karna dropped into a deep curtsey and rose to see a tall, beautifully dressed woman regarding her. But instead of the haughty composure she would have expected, the older woman was smiling.

"By Tash," she said, "You look so like your mother, my dear."

* * *

Author's note:

Apologies for ending it there but this chapter proved to be a lot longer than expected. I also started writing it about a fortnight ago and have re-written the first half about five times. Apparently, deep discussion of awakening feelings is not something I find easy to write!

I think it's because I have been beating around the bush for so long with these two and it's very hard to finally work out how to realistically get them to realise and admit their feelings. I even had an argument with my husband about this when asking him to describe when he realised he fell in love with me! Apparently, guys find it hard to express their feelings, much less explain how they realised – so I am partly going to blame Peridan's gender for this! I hope I did it alright… what d'you think?

Corin was my much needed comic relief because this chapter was very intense and hard to write!

We're definitely at the angsty and dramatic part of the story now but more to come! What will Karna do? Will she stay with Menelay? Will she go to Narnia? Will Peridan ever learn to express his feelings?

Find out next time! I am not sure how many chapters are left … we're close to HHB events now so I would say maybe … three more in Tashbaan? Not entirely sure but I think less than ten overall.

Thank you so much to Mel, Anyabar, Kilgarrah and Zoey for your continued support and reviews, you guys really are amazing. And thank you Ashensong for your lovely review, it really encouraged me.

Thanks again and please let me know what you think!

Breeze.


	20. Revelations

Daring to Dream

Chapter Nineteen

Revelations

Karna stared at the Tarkheena. _Had she just said what she thought she had?_

She stood there, frozen for several seconds before she remembered where she was. Quickly, she flung herself to the ground in a bow.

"My lady Tarkheena," she began.

Gentle hands raised her. She looked up to see a lined, caring face. Beneath all the finery, the Tarkheena was askind as Lord Peridan.

"Please, my dear, do not bow," she said firmly. She led Karna to a futon and gave her a glass of iced sherbet. "Never bow to me. I cannot stand such formality, especially among friends."

Karna stared. "Friends, my lady?"

The woman nodded. "Friends, my dear. As I was saying, you look very like your mother when she was your age."

"You know my mother?" Karna exclaimed. "When? How?"

"We discovered it quite by chance," Peridan interceded. "Have a drink and let us explain."

The young girl nodded, blushing at her lack of self-control. But this woman had known _Mother!_

"Please allow me to introduce Tarkeena Menelay. Tarkheena, this is Karna, daughter of Tarkheena Hezayla and Tarkhaan Harradin."

Karna's mouth dropped open. How did he know the name of her father?

"I am very pleased to meet you, Miss Karna," the Tarkheena said warmly. "I must apologise. You appear quite dumb-founded. I am sorry to spring such a story upon you, but every word of it is the truth."

"You knew my mother?" Karna queried.

The older woman nodded. "I knew her as Hezayla and she was one of my dearest friends growing up. We were married within a year of each other."

Karna allowed this new information to sink in. She had known that her mother was a Tarkheena, but to have met someone who knew her when she was her own age … someone who had known her at her happiest…

"I am sorry to tell you, my Lady Menelay, but my mother … died."

She bowed her head and felt the pain rush through her at the finality of her statement. Mother was dead. She would never see her again. Eventually she managed to regain her composure and look up. When she did, she was greeted by two expressions of sympathy. They nearly made her well up again.

"I know Miss Karna and I am so very sorry. Hezayla was a dear friend of mine and I will always mourn the fact that we were never able to see each other again."

"Hezal," Karna choked out.

"What?"

"My mother was called Hezal. She shortened her name when she married my step father Tarneesh."

"I see. Was she happy in her second marriage?"

Karna hesitated. "She was content, my lady."

Menelay nodded, not missing what was not said. "And I understand you have siblings?"

"Four. Two sisters and two brothers."

The older woman smiled. "Five children. Hezayla always wished to have a large family. She was all but in love with you when you were born."

Karna actually felt herself smiling. "Will you tell me about her? About my father?"

"Hezayla was so bright and vivacious. We would meet most days. She loved to dance and paint. She was actually a very talented artist when she gave her attention to it. But she always wanted to be here, there and everywhere."

Menelay smiled. "When their betrothal was announced your mother was obviously nervous of your father. He was such a good man Karna. A full twenty years her senior, but he cared for her and she grew to adore him. Do you know anything of your grandmother?"

Karna shook her head.

The older woman sighed. "She was by all accounts a very pretty maid. She served in your great grandfather's home as the head servant girl and she caught the eye of his first-born son. I apologise for the wording but he was an absolute scoundrel. He had a pretty face and charmed your poor grandmother off her feet. He promised her the world – marriage, dowry, wealth, if she would only return his love. Of course the poor innocent believed him and found herself pregnant at just seventeen.

"Her family cast her out and her master would not listen to her. She would have died had your grandfather not found his conscience at the last minute and admitted the truth of his words. Of course the father raged and would not accept the child, but in the end he was forced to and your poor mother was raised as a charity case. She told me of her poor mother's sad story and honoured her by naming you in her honour."

Karna gasped. "I am named for my grandmother?"

Menelay smiled gently. "Yes, my dear. And I hope that you will find greater joy than your poor mother or grandmother."

The girl nodded. "Is it true that my father was beheaded as a traitor by the Tisroc (may he live forever)?"

The Tarkheena's expression was sombre. "Yes, my dear. I honour our Tisroc (may he live forever) and his will is the will of Tash, the irresistible, the inexorable. But I have also heard it said from a reliable source that your father was killed for refusing to behead a chained man. The Tisroc gave him the duty as an honour and your father asked him to allow fair combat because he could not in honour kill an unarmed man. The Tisroc saw it as an act of insubordination and beheaded your father on the spot, declaring him a traitor."

Karna stared at her hands and simply nodded. "My mother had said as much, my lady Menelay," she finally managed. "But if you will give me leave, I will remember my father as an honourable knight, rather than a traitor."

"I would not have you remember him in any other way, child," the older woman replied. "He was a man of honour and I will always recall him as a dear friend."

A sombre silence fell upon the room for several moments. Karna toyed with the sleeve of Flora's borrowed gown, pondering the truth of what she had heard.

So now she knew where she had come from. She knew that she had been loved. That a father had once kissed her head and held her safely in his arms.

"Karna," she jerked up to stare at Lord Peridan. "Forgive me. I know that this is a lot to take in, but we both thought that it was important to know where you come from, so you can move forward."

Karna returned his gaze. "I thank you for your kindness, my lord," she replied. "It is just …"

"I know, my dear, it is a lot to take in," Menelay finished kindly. "But Lord Peridan is right, we wanted you to know how much you were and have been loved. I know life has not been easy for you."

Karna sighed. "I can understand Tarneesh's feelings towards me, and even more so now that I know the truth of my father's death. I would have seemed a burden from my very first moment under his roof and the bastard of a traitor as well …"

"Karna, you were no bastard. You were born into a loving marriage."

"Then the brat of a traitor at the very least, madam. I suppose I didn't help myself by being so wilful, either. If I had been as obedient and submissive as my sisters …"

"You would not be who you are today, Karna," Peridan finished. "And you would be married to the blacksmith."

Karna shuddered.

Menelay interceded, "Karna, may we now looked forward? I have a proposal to make to you."

"A proposal, my lady?"

"Yes. You see, though you may not know it, I was appointed your godmother when you were a baby."

"My godmother?"

Karna felt stupid repeating every phrase back of Lady Menelay, but she was starting to feel overwhelmed by the number of revelations she was being told.

Menelay smiled at her confusion. "It is true, my dear. I was named your godmother when you were a month old in the great temple of Tash and I would like to offer you a home."

The young girl simple gaped.

"My only daughter has been married for two years and I have no companion to keep me company. My sons are all either married or in training for the army and my husband is so often away."

She took Karna's cold hands gently in her own. "In other words, I would be honoured if you would come to live with me."

The young woman stared for a full minute before forcing herself to speak.

"Live with you?" she gasped out. "In Tashbaan, my lady?"

"No, my dear. We think it would be safer for you to leave Tashbaan so the plan would be to take you to our palace in Jazeera for the summer months at least. Both Lord Peridan and I think you need a fresh start."

"You wish me to be your servant?"

"No, Karna. I wish for you to be my companion, my guest. To experience the life that you should have had from birth."

"To live as a _Tarkheena?_ " Karna exclaimed shrilly. She gawked at the older woman, unable to help herself. Peridan was forced to smother a chuckle and even Menelay smiled.

"Yes, but without any pressure to marry against your will, dear."

"But, my lady, what would your husband say?"

"I have spoken to Abramman at length and he agrees with me, Karna. He remembers you as a babe and has fond memories of Hezayla. He asked only that you visit our home before we leave the city for Jazeera. He would like to meet you."

Karna nodded, though she was finding it hard to find words.

The older woman was kind. "I know this is overwhelming, my dear. So I would advise you to rest, think and consider my offer. I know that Lord Peridan has offered you his protection. I shall depart and allow you to have speech with your friends."

The Tarkheena rose and gave a small bow before turning to leave. Karna hurriedly returned the gesture before walking with her towards the door.

"Thank you for your great kindness," she stuttered.

Menelay turned and gently touched her cheek. "You are so like your mother, my dear," she stated. With a final smile, she left.

Karna had only been sitting at the window for a minute before Peridan entered after seeing Menelay to the door. His expression was curious but strangely nervous at the same time.

"How are you feeling, Karna?" he asked.

"Overwhelmed, my lord," she replied. "I had no idea …"

He nodded. "I know and I am sorry I could not be more explicit, but Tarkheena Menelay wished to tell you the truth herself."

She nodded. "Do you think I should accept her offer, my lord?"

"I think it would be wise, Karna. I can only offer you my protection for as long as we remain in Tashbaan …" Peridan paused, his expression suddenly guarded.

Karna stared. "Are you leaving, my Lord Peridan?"

"Only when it is necessary, Karna."

Suddenly, the truth struck her. "The queen will refuse Prince Rabadash?"

Peridan hurriedly hushed her. "Please do not speak such words, even in these walls, Karna," "We only remain as guests of your king as long as the prince believes her majesty will accept his proposal. I have heard nothing to the contrary from the queen but many of us fear that the marriage will not take place."

"But, my lord, how will you escape? The prince will never allow the queen to leave Tashbaan."

"We do not know her majesty's thoughts upon the subject. But suffice to say, I do not think we will remain much longer in this city as honoured guests."

Karna suddenly shuddered. "But my Lord Peridan, if the prince discovers …"

"Hush Karna, please do not fear. My King and Mister Tumnus our chancellor will have a plan to ensure our safe departure, I am sure. Now please, do not worry for me. Use your energy to consider Tarkheena Menelay's proposal. You are not friendless or without protection. I would advise you to get some rest and think carefully upon your decision."

Karna nodded. "Thank you, my lord."

Peridan smiled and was about to rise when the doors suddenly burst open. He spun to see Marken standing, wild-eyed and urgent in the doorway.

"Peridan, it's Prince Corin … he's _gone!_ "

* * *

Queen Susan of Narnia had never been much given to pacing, but after two hours without news of their young charge, she had been unable to focus upon her embroidery. Dell's eyes had followed her the whole time and the panther seemed frustratingly calm to the young woman.

"How can you just lie there, Dell?" she exclaimed, rounding upon her friend.

The feline blinked patiently. "Will becoming hot and flustered help the situation, my queen?" she enquired.

Susan glared at her in a very unladylike way before seating herself.

"I just feel so … helpless!" she exclaimed, feeling tears starting to fall as her anger softened to sorrow. "He is so young Dell … what if he is hurt?"

The panther rose and gently butted Susan's knee with her head. "Do not weep, Susan. You know as well as I how head-strong and capable young Corin is at getting into scrapes. I am sure that he is just as adept at getting out of them."

"But what if he is injured and unable to get help?"

"I have never known a youngster so capable with his fists. Please do not worry about him."

The young woman wiped her eyes and managed a watery smile.

Dell returned it. "That is better. Shall I fetch Flora to help you prepare for this evening?"

Susan hesitated. "I suppose I cannot use Corin's absence as an excuse to remain at home?"

The cat regarded her shrewdly. "Do you need an excuse, your majesty?"

The queen found herself flushing. "In truth, I should enjoy a quiet evening. I know that the prince has put on all these entertainments for my enjoyment but this pace of living is … well frankly quite exhausting."

Dell nodded. "Well it is something you will have to get used to, if you are to one day be the prince's wife."

She again nodded but she did not meet her friend's eyes. The panther sat back on her hind paws and refused to look away. She saw the trace of a blush staining the young queen's cheeks.

"Susan, may I be so bold as to make an observation?"

Eventually, green eyes met black.

"Yes, my friend?"

"I believe there is another reason for your hesitation."

"Which is?"

"My queen, you know the reason. You have to admit it to yourself."

Susan felt the tears returning but forced herself not to look away from Dell. "I … I don't love him …" she stuttered. "Oh Dell what have I done? Why did I come here? How could I have let myself be taken in by flattery and charm like a gullible child?"

Dell placed a paw on her knee. "Susan. Heed my words. You are not gullible or foolish as you imply. I myself saw the behaviour of this Rabadash and was taken in. He _is_ charming and appeared to be an honourable, noble prince. I am afraid that we were both deceived. It appears that his true talents lie in manipulation and presentation rather than truth and honour."

"I am humiliated by my own weakness …"

"You are not humiliated. You made him no promise."

"But if it hadn't been for my decision Prince Corin would still be safe…"

"And getting into mischief at his father's castle rather than in Tashbaan. My lady, this is not your fault. Now if I may, our first action must be to tell your brother the king and Mr Tumnus. We must acquaint them with your decision."

"But they are out searching for Corin and Prince Rabadash still believes we will be attending tonight's feast."

"Very well, I will find Flora, if you will write a message to the prince. First we must make your excuses."

The panther left and the queen sat down to deal with the necessary note.

By the time it had been sent there was still no word from the search parties and Susan was again becoming worried. She was just going to send Flora for news when she remembered their unexpected visitor.

"Flora, did you meet Lord Peridan's guest?"

Her maid smiled. "Yes, your majesty. I leant her my spare dress. The poor thing only had one and it was terribly dirty."

"King Edmund and I met her sister. Did you hear whether she slept well?"

"We did not speak of that, your majesty. She seemed more shocked than anything else. She couldn't understand why we were helping her. It made me sad to think that she would be so surprised by kindness."

Susan nodded. "Her sister was similarly surprised by our offer of a mere drink, Flora. It saddened me also, but I believe Calormen is a very different land to Narnia."

Flora nodded. "Can I bring you a drink, your majesty? It is very hot in here. Today seems more airless than others."

"Some lemonade would be very welcome, thank you. In fact, could you bring a pitcher and a bowl of water for the Lady Dell? I should also like to speak to Miss Karna if she feels well enough."

Susan's maid bobbed a curtsey and left.

As she waited, Susan pondered the revelation that Dell had forced her to admit to herself. She didn't love this prince, had never loved him and the thought pained her. Had it really only been flattery that had brought her here?

She flushed at how easily she had been taken in.

It was true that other princes had sought a marriage of alliance with Narnia and asked for her hand. One when she was seventeen and another when she was twenty-one. But she had not cared for either.

By comparison, Rabadash had both impressed and intrigued her. He had seemed to be everything that a prince should be … but then she had questioned him more carefully about him role when he was king. He had spoken passionately about the greatness of his nation, of how they would crush their "enemies" into the dust.

Yet, he had then spoken about her life as his wife. He had boasted of how she would only wear the finest silks and most expensive jewels. He had made her sound like a possession rather than what she wanted to be – a partner, a helpmate. She wanted to help her husband rule the kingdom, not simply be the bearer of his children and a pretty ornament upon his arm.

Susan sighed. She knew that she would die as the wife of this man. She could _never_ marry him and stay true to who she was.

"My lady." Susan stood as Flora entered, followed by a tall, bashful young woman. She kept her eyes down and bowed deeply to the queen. The dark-haired queen was quick to raise her and urged her to sit on the chair opposite.

"It is a pleasure to meet you, Karna," she said kindly, offering her a glass of lemonade. "I had the pleasure of meeting your sister yesterday."

Karna looked up in astonishment. "My sister, your highness?"

"Yes. Mistress Karlis came to beg the assistance of Lord Peridan and he was urgent to help you. I must say we were all greatly relieved to hear of your safe arrival."

"Th-thank you, my lady. I do not deserve such kindness …"

Susan held up a hand. "Karna, please listen to me. Yes, you do. Peridan has told us of the hardship you have faced and it is the least we can do to offer you shelter in your time of need."

"But, my lady, with all due respect, you don't know me! Lord Peridan has been _so kind_. First by bringing Master Timeon to heal my arm and then by giving me protection. I have never known anyone like him."

The queen suddenly smiled gently. "And I believe he would say the same about you, Miss Karna."

Karna stared. Susan actually laughed at her stunned expression. "Forgive me for my candour, may I call you Karna?"

The Calormen maid nodded mutely.

"Karna. I have known Peridan for over ten years. We have grown up together and I can tell you than I have never known Peridan to be so protective over any young woman besides myself and my sister. Don't get me wrong, he is honourable man in all he does, but I have never known him to act with such passion. He is renowned for his tact; it is why he is our chief ambassador."

Karna flushed and took a sip of her lemonade. It was so cool and refreshing that she finished the glass in a few gulps.

"Forgive me if I have been too candid," Susan apologised. "But I know what it is to feel lost and overwhelmed by my circumstances. I just wished you to know that you are not friendless or alone in this."

"Has Lord Peridan told you of Tarkheena Menelay's proposal, my lady?"

The queen nodded. "He has."

"And would you advise me to take it?"

"I believe it is the safest course of action Karna."

"I believe so, your highness. But then, how does pondering Lord Peridan's character serve me, my lady queen? If my safest course of action is to live with Lady Menelay how can thinking of him or Narnia help me?"

Susan nodded. "I understand your quandary, Karna. But I simply wished you to know the truth of the matter before you make your decision. With the circumstances as they are, I would advise you to meet with Tarkheena Menelay and her husband tomorrow. I know that it is Peridan's dearest wish to keep you safe."

The Calormen maid nodded, her eyes downcast. She could see the wisdom of the queen's words; she knew what logic would dictate. But once again, she felt her deepest desire warring with the safe choice. Very quietly, she allowed the words to escape from her lips.

"But what if what I dream isn't the safe option?"

She forced herself to look up and meet the lovely queen's clear, honest gaze.

"It is your decision to make, Karna. Listen to your heart."

* * *

Author's note:

This is a bit of a plot filler but it's also wrapped up a lot of unanswered questions and Susan has finally realised what Rabadash is! Sorry I know this wasn't very action filled but there's a lot of character/plot building also going on.

I hadn't originally planned to have Susan in this chapter but I loved writing her and Dell's scene a few chapters back and I couldn't imagine her being under the same roof as Karna and not wanting to help.

So … what will happen next? Corin is gone and we're finally up to the events of HHB so things will be happening soon!

This is the night before they spot Shasta so it should all (hopefully!) fit together next chapter! I also have a week of half term so may (reports willing) get another update done by next week (maybe can't promise!).

Thanks so much to Mel, Kilgharrah and Zoey for reviewing, it meant a lot. Thank you to everyone who is following and who has favourite this story. It's a real labour of love and we're finally getting there!

Also thanks Mel for the romance tip – a couple of Miss Austen's characters have had an influence on the Susan/Rabadash character discussion (can anyone guess who? ).

As always thank you so much for your support and reading, please review and let me know what you think!

Breeze.


	21. What Lies Ahead

Daring to Dream

Chapter Twenty

What Lies Ahead

Master Sallowpad of Narnia had never really cared for buildings.

Cair Paravel had been constructed in such a way that the talking birds were able to enter and exit through several cleverly devised roof entrances. In a similar way there were a few roosts built into the castle to enable them to live in relative comfort.

The architect of Master Tirshan's house had not made such considerations in its construction.

In order to let Sallowpad exit the building with some independence, the delegation had taken to leaving doors and windows open throughout the house. The many servants had protested greatly at first, concerned about the queen's privacy. But once the reason had been explained, they had relented and now tolerated the behaviour as one of their guests' many "eccentricities".

Sallowpad was personally of the opinion that the Calormene people considered the Narnians very 'outlandish' or even 'barbaric' (as he had heard them referred to behind a gloved hand). Even the politest seemed to have little tact when referring to the delegation's diverse population. They were freely referred to as the 'barbarian lords', as though this was some sort of compliment.

With an indignant ruffle of his feathers, Sallowpad pushed the thought aside and determined to think of other things. He had known that the Calormene people would react with distrust to himself and the other talking beasts, and they were used to such a reaction when visiting foreign lands.

Instead of gazing upon the city, Sallowpad spread his wings and flew to the roof of the building. After finding a suitable perch upon the roof, he turner his eyes from Tashbaan to stare out far to the north-east at the desert. It spread before him like a golden sea, as it had long ago in his youth. If he squinted carefully, he was just able to make out the dark shadow which was Mount Pire.

Slowly he retraced the journey he had taken as a young bird, heading straight for Mount Pire and then following the Winding Arrow River all the way through the first the foothills and then the forest of Archenland to Anvard. It seemed a lifetime ago but he could remember the route as though it were yesterday.

Gradually the stars disappeared from the dark expanse of the heavens and gave way to the paler grey of the dawn. If they had been in Narnia, a chorus of birdsong would have welcomed the new day. But in this arid climate, a single bird trilled its sweet melody. Unable to help himself, Sallowpad joined his own cry to the bird's song, adding almost a percussion of croaky cries to its tune.

The talking raven was so immersed in their duet that he missed the pacing figure for a while. Eventually, it was the release of an obviously human sigh that drew him from the song.

He glanced down and saw a silhouette, standing against the backdrop of the city below. Instantly recognising his old friend, the raven spread his wings and flew soundlessly to where the Narnian lord stood, leaning upon the wall.

If Peridan was surprised by the arrival of Sallowpad, he did not show it. He continued to observe the city with a pensive expression. The raven had found a comfortable perch on a nearby branch and observed him closely for a long moment.

"What troubles you, my friend? You seem troubled. Have you had any rest this night?"

Peridan returned the talking bird's gaze with a sombre one of his own. "Negligible, my friend. My mind has been too preoccupied."

"Peridan, you know as well as I that Prince Corin is just as capable at removing himself from scrapes as he is at getting into them. I never met a child more prone to mischief in my life."

"But her grace, the queen, has been distraught over his disappearance."

"He will return, as well you know."

The man nodded and returned his gaze to the city. His expression had not altered.

Sallowpad flew closer and settled himself upon the wall, though it was not such a secure perch. He approached close enough that Peridan was forced to look at him.

"My friend, may I be candid?"

The knight nodded.

"I do not think that you should use the prince's disappearance as an excuse for your current mood. We both know the real reason for your preoccupation and inability to rest."

The man sighed.

The raven waited patiently. He knew that Peridan would eventually speak.

His patience was finally rewarded by Peridan's frustrated exhalation.

"I cannot speak of it, Sallowpad!"

"You can, my friend and you must."

He clutched the wall in aggravation. "I _can't!_ "

"Why not?"

"Because what I wish for is wrong. I cannot say it. It isn't right to want it when a solution has been put forward that solves every problem …"

"Why aren't your wishes right?"

"She won't be safe …" Peridan whispered these last words and raised his hands to his face as he finally admitted the truth.

"Miss Karna?" the raven prompted.

His friend nodded.

"You wish for her to come to Narnia with us?"

Again the man nodded.

"Why do you think this desire wrong, Peridan?"

"Don't you see, Sallowpad? She has the chance of a new start here. A new family, a new home and security for life. Her step father will never see her again and she will be able to start over in safety."

"Why would this be better than coming with us?"

"Because we don't know if we will even make it out of this forsaken country alive!" Peridan paused after he spoke, the blood draining from his face.

He was instantly contrite. "I apologise my friend. I should not have used such language in front of you. I did not mean to misspeak about our gentle queen's judgement."

The raven shook his head. "I do not blame you, Peridan. We have all marvelled at her majesty's decision at some point during this visit. But as we have said before, we must trust in her highness' judgement. It is after all, her choice and not our own."

The knight nodded, though he did not look comforted. He started to pace and wrung his hands distractedly.

"I cannot promise her a future that she might not have, Sallowpad. It is logical and wisest to encourage her to leave with Tarkheena Menelay."

The raven let out a sharp cry that made Peridan stop his pacing. "Now you listen to me, my friend and please listen well. I sometimes feel as though I am speaking to a child, not a man of six and twenty!"

Peridan stared at his friend, it was rare for Sallowpad to ever raise his voice above a gentle croak. Earnestly, he listened as the raven continued,

"When I first laid eyes upon Velvetplume I knew within the first couple of minutes that I would never meet another hen like her. She became my mate that day and we have never looked back."

"I have watched human courtship and mating rituals for the past fourteen years and they still confuse me. You see another human who obviously attracts you and you feel drawn to. I have then watched you humans dance around the issue for sometimes months if not even years. From the moment you first saw Miss Karna she intrigued you. Now you have finally realised that you care for her. Where is the confusion in that?"

"You need to tell Miss Karna how you feel and allow her to decide. If you at least make your feelings and wishes known, then she can at least make a decision while fully understanding her position."

Peridan was quiet for a long time after his friend finished speaking.

This was one of the reasons that he trusted the raven so implicitly; he could always be sure of hearing the undiluted truth. Ravens did not flatter, they called a spade a spade and beat you round the head with it, as Lucy would say. Eventually, he forced himself to speak.

"Sallowpad, it is not that simple."

"It is!" the bird exclaimed with an impatient flap of his wings. "Stop wasting time and be honest, my friend."

"But I am not you and Miss Karna is not Velvetplume."

"Do you care for her?"

"Yes."

"Do you love her?"

Peridan swallowed and made himself form the words. "I think I might."

"Then _fight for her Peridan!_ Don't allow yourself to let go of the one woman you might ever love. You've had to come half the way across the world to find her."

The knight nodded, finally he was starting to see. "I will do it," he agreed. "I will tell her how I feel and invite her to come to Narnia. Of course it will be her decision, but at least I can tell her how I feel and let her know my wishes."

The raven nodded, finally satisfied. "That's all you can do, my friend. And do it sooner rather than later. Who know how much longer we will be here?"

Peridan nodded and rose. He inclined his head deeply to Sallowpad. It was a gesture of great respect among the talking birds and was one that the raven returned with equal gravity.

"I cannot thank you enough for your help, old friend," the man stated. "Your wisdom has served me many times before, but something tells me that this might be one of the most important conversations of my life."

Unexpectedly, the raven cackled in amusement. "Then I hope you will follow through and not miss the obvious again, my friend!"

Peridan grinned and took his leave.

* * *

Karna had woken early. She had spent the hour before dawn pacing her small chamber, unable to switch off her mind.

Normally, she would have spent the morning with her hands busy, sewing or cleaning or cooking. Even with her broken arm she had been able to help Karlis around the house with the odd spot of scrubbing. As it was, she was trapped in this chamber, always in danger of being seen by one of her old friends among the servant girls.

Yet despite her inaction, she had plenty to ponder as she paced. Yesterday's events buzzed through her mind along with the truth about her parentage and her mother's early life. It had given her real comfort to know that her parents had truly loved each other, but at the same time it made life seem so very unfair.

But then, hadn't she already discussed such things with her sisters and Peridan? She recalled the conversation they had shared just after she had realised her mother was dying. Neither Peridan nor her sisters had had an answer as to why Hezal had died, but they had all been able to accept it in a way that Karna had struggled to.

There was an acceptance in Calormene society, a stoicism that she definitely lacked. It was a tolerance that had enabled her mother to marry Tarneesh, that had let Tarlana accept her lot in life without complaint.

The truth was that her sister faced a future of drudgery as her mother's replacement until Kanzeesh took a bride. Even then, she would be sold off to the highest bidder and forced to be a housekeeper and broodmare for her own husband …

Karna mentally chastised herself.

 _Broodmare?_

Who was she to criticise the life choices of her sisters? What other prospects did they have in life? How dare _she_ criticise them in such a way? Did she have half of Tarlana's patience and maturity? Or even a quarter of Karlis' generosity?

Ashamed at herself, Karna took a seat by the window and stared down at the side passage it looked over. She saw the Watch passing by, their spears raised in an aggressive manner. Idly, she wondered who they might be pursuing, probably some thief or pick-pocket.

A knock drew her from her pondering.

She stood quickly and straightened her hair. "Come in!"

She was greeted by Flora's infectious smile. "Good morning Miss Karna, I'm to bring you to Lord Peridan's study. They thought it would be best for you to meet their excellencies in relative privacy."

"Thank you, Flora. Have they found the prince yet?"

The hand maid's face fell. "No. Her majesty is so concerned for his well-being. The poor lady wept all night."

Karna nodded sympathetically. "I hope he is found without delay."

"We all do. Now come, we must make haste. It would not do to keep his lordship waiting."

Karna was shown into the now familiar room and smiled at the sight of Peridan and Timeon.

"Good morning, my lords," she greeted, "I trust you both slept well?"

Both men nodded and Karna was shown to a chair at the table. A simple meal had been laid, one that was much more to Karna's liking than the sweet deserts of the previous evening.

"We were wondering if you would you like some company when you speak to the Tarkhaan and Tarkheena, Karna?" Peridan said, offering her a platter of dried fruit.

Karna took a handful, considering his question. "Thank you, my lord. I believe I would."

The knight nodded.

"We think that would be most wise," Timeon interceded. "You must not feel friendless, Karna. It is important to remember that there are other paths open to you."

She stared. "What paths, Master Timeon?"

"Coming to Narnia with us," the physician replied. "You would be most welcome to join us on the voyage back."

Peridan stared at the healer and felt his mouth drop open at the same time as Karna's. _Timeon was inviting Karna to Narnia?_

Karna was actually gaping at him with her mouth open. It would have been funny if he had not been so shocked himself. Quickly he gathered his composure.

" _Come to Narnia?"_ Karna exclaimed. "But Master Timeon, why would you invite me to Narnia? You don't even know me!"

In all the years he had known Timeon, Peridan had very rarely seen the older man betray any emotion. But now, his lined face held a gentle and almost tender expression.

"Karna," he said, "I know you are brave. I know you are courageous. I know you stand up for what you believe. I know many members of the Narnian delegation including their majesties have come to admire you. I know you have a good heart … and I know that you remind me of my Gwen."

Karna's gape turned into a full on gawp of disbelief. "Gwen?" she queried in a tiny voice.

"My daughter," the healer explained. "My beautiful, brave little girl. She was very like you. Brave, stubborn to a fault, always thought she knew best …" He smiled. "Always telling me the right way for things to be done."

Karna's surprise softened to a smile. "She sounds wonderful."

Timeon agreed. "She was, and only eleven when the sweating sickness took her and my dear wife one dreadful winter. You see, I was a physician in Archenland before I came to Narnia. I was a broken man, had been for six long years … and then I heard about the death of the White Witch. I came to Narnia and slowly … their highnesses, the talking beasts, my friends in Cair Paravel … they reminded me what it means to actually live, instead of just existing."

Karna and Peridan listened intently to every word Timeon said. The older man took a long draught of watered-down ale before continuing.

"I wanted you to know that you can come to Narnia. I have a home outside of Cair Paravel. A small holding with a few animals, and you'd be very welcome to live with me. I am aware that the Tarkheena has made you an offer, but know that it isn't your only option."

Not for the first time in the past week, Karna felt overwhelmed! She managed to nod, her appetite now gone. Part of her wished that things would slow down and give her time to properly consider her options. But she knew that time was not a luxury she had.

Eventually, she forced herself to speak.

"I cannot express enough how grateful I am, Master Timeon," she said. "Ever since I first spoke to Lord Peridan, I have dreamed of Narnia. For you to offer me a place in your home … I simply have no words. Thank you, so very much."

She smiled at the older man and touched by the warmth in his face. This good man was not only offering her an escape, but offering was her a life with him, a home.

"The truth is … I feel very overwhelmed. This week has changed my life so completely. My mother is dead. I have been pursued for my life and now I have been offered two courses that my life can take. I can only request that you give me time to consider what course is the right one for me. I have been amazed at your hospitality and the welcome I have received. I have much to think about."

The two men nodded.

"Of course," Timeon agreed. "It is a big decision and one not to be made lightly. We will leave you now in peace."

Peridan nodded and turned to follow the healer out. It was only once they were out of ear shot that Timeon spoke.

"Did you not have something to add, Peridan?"

The knight stared. "I beg your pardon?"

"Why did you not speak to Karna as well?"

"If we are discussing this, may I ask why you invited Karna to come and live in Narnia without first telling me?"

"I only spoke of it with King Edmund early this morning and he whole-heartedly agreed with me. I didn't have time to inform you before Karna entered."

Peridan nodded. "So you really wish to have her live with you?"

Timeon nodded. "If anyone deserves a proper home and love it is that poor girl."

"I can't argue with that."

"Then why did you not add your invitation to my own, Peridan? Have you spoken to Karna of your feelings?"

The Narnian lord grimaced. "Are they that obvious to everyone but myself?"

Timeon actually smiled. "That is often the way, my friend. But I repeat what I said, Karna deserves to know that there is not just a home, but a man who loves her, wanting her to come to Narnia. I would surmise that Sallowpad has already made this point and probably far more succinctly than I."

Peridan smirked. "He compared my powers of observation to that of a child."

"He is not wrong," the healer agreed.

The sound of approaching feet caused them both to look up. Tarkheena Menelay and her husband Tarkhaan Abramman were being led towards them by the butler. Master Mardeesh bowed them deeply through the doorway, his nose almost level with the door handle.

The Tarkheena approached Peridan smilingly. "Lord Peridan of Narnia, I believe you have met my husband, Tarkhaan Abramman of Tashbaan?"

Peridan bowed, noting the posture of Menelay's husband. He carried himself with the assurance of one who is used to having their orders obeyed. His expression and stance both show how comfortably he held his wealth and power.

"In the name of Tash, the irresistible, the inexorable, I greet you, Lord Peridan."

"And in the name of Aslan, the son of the Emperor over the Seas, I return your gracious greeting, Lord Tarkhaan," he replied.

Tarkhaan Abramman inclined his head courteously.

Timeon was similarly introduced and they moved towards the door.

Peridan pushed it open and but before moving further.

Karna was sitting facing the open window, her chin leaning upon her fingertips. She seemed deeply in thought, and he wished that he could give her more time to rest. But they were here and there was nothing he could do. The decision would be hers and hers alone.

He stepped decisively through the door, startling her back to reality.

"Miss Karna, may I present Tarkhaan Abramman of Tashbaan?"

The Tarkhaan strode through the door before his wife. He seemed very tall and broad next to Karna's slim form. She paled slightly at this impressive entrance but gathered her wits enough to curtsey in the Calormene way.

The nobleman regarded the peasant girl critically. There was more of curiosity than warmth in his hard face. Karna stood before him, clasping her hands nervously. Peridan noticed her fingers were clenched so tightly that the knuckles were white.

Eventually, Abramman inclined his head to her.

"I greet you in the name of Tash (may he be praised!), Miss Karna of Tashbaan."

Karna also inclined her head. "I thank you for your courteous greeting in the name of Tash, the inexorable, the irresistible, my Lord Tarkhaan," she replied. "I am honoured by your visit. Thank you for your condescension in coming to see me."

The Tarkhaan nodded. "My wife can be quite persuasive and she is convinced that you are her old friend's daughter. Come, let us be seated."

Karna perched on the edge of the futon as the Tarkhaan observed her shrewdly from the plush sofa opposite. She didn't dare to look away.

"My husband was very curious to meet you, Miss Karna," Tarkheena Menelay said kindly. "He insisted upon this meeting."

"I think such a request is to be expected, oh my wife," the older man stated, "given your wishes."

"I am myself assured of Miss Karna's parentage," Peridan interjected. "She was able to provide information of her mother's life and corroborate her identity before I had even revealed what Tarkheena Menelay had shared with me."

The Tarkhaan nodded. He seemed to be looking at Karna very intently. It made her uncomfortable.

Eventually, he spoke. "I can see what my lady wife was speaking of. There is no doubt that you are your mother's daughter, Miss Karna. You are the picture of her when she was your age. The resemblance is striking." He paused. "But you have your father's height."

Karna cast down her eyes. It was the first time her father had been mentioned by anyone but her mother or Menelay. She would have loved to ask questions about him … if she had dared.

"Now I have been told by my wife how you came to be under the protection of the Narnian delegation, but I would like to hear your version of what happened."

Karna looked up.

The Tarkhaan's eyes were dark and calculating. His expression gave nothing away. Though at the same time, there was no judgement there. Just simple command.

This was not a man who pretended to be something such as Master Tirshan did. This was a nobleman who was used to one thing – complete obedience.

Suddenly Karna was afraid.

What would he think of her actions? Would he accept her stubbornness and rejection of Lavarin as Peridan had done? Or would he consider her a wilful, ungrateful wench? Disobedience from women was seen as one of the greatest slurs against a man's honour in their culture.

"Karna."

She looked up to see Menelay smiling kindly. "Just tell Lord Abramman what you told me. We ask nothing more."

The girl nodded, gathering her composure. Taking a deep breath, she started.

"I was raised in the house of my stepfather, Tarneesh. He was not fond of me and resented having to raise a traitor's child beneath his roof. I noticed from a young age that he treated me differently to my siblings. I only found out my true parentage a few months ago when I worked up the courage to ask Mother about who my real father was. I noticed seen how much taller I was than the rest of my family. I worked in the employ of Master Tirshan the house builder and it was through my work that I came to first make Lord Peridan's acquaintance."

Karna chanced a glance at Peridan and received a reassuring smile. Emboldened, she continued,

"My stepfather arranged my betrothal to the local blacksmith and I tried to accept the match but … I couldn't …"

She trailed off. She didn't know how to explain her reasoning to this powerful lord.

"Why could you not accept the marriage which would have freed you from your stepfather's dislike?" Tarkhaan Abramman asked.

Karna struggled to find the words, but she knew that she had to speak.

"I … I … I would see Master Lavarin with my sisters on the way to work. My lord … he … his looks frightened us. He was not a controlled man. He allowed … he allowed his appetites to show. I feared him. I feared to be married to such a man."

"He showed carnal interest?" the lord prompted.

Karna nodded and ducked her head. She flushed in shame and could feel tears threatening. If there was one thing that she knew that she must not do, it was cry.

"I see," Lord Abramman eventually remarked. "And what did you do?"

"I … I expressed my disinclination for the match," she replied, choosing her words with care.

"You rejected the marriage? Publically?"

She nodded ashamedly. "I did."

"And your stepfather ..?"

"He was furious, my lord Tarkhaan. He beat me and broke my arm. I fled to my brother-in-law's house and lived there until I heard of my mother's illness …"

She bowed her head, knowing that she could not speak any more. A long silence followed before the Tarkhaan eventually spoke.

"I see. You need say no more, Miss Karna."

Karna nodded gratefully and waited for him to cast judgement. She knew that the final decision would come down to Tarkhaan Abramman. For all Menelay's assurances of help, it would always be the husband's final decision.

In a similar way, the kind noblewoman might speak of loving her husband, but theirs would never be a marriage of equals. While Karna was sure that Abramman must love his wife, she knew that he would never allow her to make large decisions without his permission. It was certainly true that a marriage like Ahoz and Karlis', one of real love and partnership, was a rare thing indeed.

Eventually, the Tarkhaan spoke. Karna forced herself to look up and saw that the calculation had left his eyes, though they still held no warmth.

"I can see that you have not had an easy life, Miss Karna. Though I would question the judgement behind some of your actions, I can understand why you have acted as you have. My wife has reminded me of a promise she once made your mother, and I am willing to uphold that promise. So, I invite you to join my household as my wife's companion. We plan to travel to Jazeera as soon as Prince Rabadash is married to the barbarian queen. We think it would be best for you to depart soon, so as to avoid detection by your stepfather."

Karna swallowed the lump in her throat and forced herself to say what was expected. "I thank you, my lord Tarkhaan for your kind offer."

The nobleman nodded and rose. "We must depart. But my wife will send word about your journey."

They all rose and bowed. Karna caught Menelay's kind smile and felt her heart falter as their honoured guests left the room. It was only once the door had closed that she allowed herself to collapse once more into her chair.

One thing was now clear. She had a choice to make and it needed to be made very soon!

* * *

Author's note:

I am sorry for the delay! I actually wrote ¾ of this a fortnight ago but work and migraines have stopped me finishing it! I know there is a lot of discussion in this chapter, but I wanted to realistically show what Karna's going through and the reality of the choices she faces. I can promise far more action and excitement in the next chapter though as things start to happen!

I would be interested to know your opinion of Abramman, I made a character change for him beyond what I originally planned and I'd like to know what you think!

As always, thank you for reading and please let me know what you think.

Thanks again,

Breeze.


	22. Kairos

Daring to Dream

Chapter Twenty One

Kairos

 _Kairos -_ _an_ _ancient Greek_ _word meaning the right or opportune moment (the 'supreme moment')._

* * *

There is a moment in everyone's life when they face a choice. A choice that will determine what path their future takes.

No-one can know when this choice will come or where that decision will lead.

None can know the judgement they will make at such a moment until they are there.

And now, she was face to face with a decision she felt incapable of making.

Throughout of her life, Karna had dreamed.

As a child, she had longed for acceptance and some approval from her then father. At the failure of this dream, she had fantasised about finding magical lands in her mother's pantry. Every time she had entered, she had pretended to be in another strange country, filled with the peculiar creatures that the poets spoke of.

When this had seemed impossible, she had dreamed about the day she would one day marry and have a home of her own. She had played endlessly with Karlis and Tarlana, always being the mother to her two little girls as she ordered them around and instructed them about the tasks of a Calormene woman.

Then Lord Perian had entered her life. With him he had brought tales of Narnia, of magic and talking beasts. Never in her life had she heard such tales. Before she had realised it, her heart had started to yearn after the most impossible of dreams.

More than anything she had ever wanted, Karna dreamed of visiting this barbarian land.

But then, like all her other imaginings, this had been a fantasy. No dreams ever came true. They were insubstantial and fleeting, like a mist in the early morning. There one minute and gone the next.

However, this time it wasn't.

In this moment, she had a choice. A decision that would define her future.

To one side lay the safe and logical reassurance of what she knew. Calormen. Far from Tashbaan. Security for life.

On the other lay uncertainty, risk and the possibility of fulfilling her greatest dream.

In this moment, this defining point of her existence, did she have the bravery to take a leap of faith? To dare to dream and chase the deepest yearning of her heart?

* * *

The front doorstep of Master Tarneesh the carver's dwelling had become the bane of his eldest daughter's life.

It had now been three days since Tarlana's father had called her into his carving workshop, a place that she was very rarely welcome. Briefly, Tarneesh had explained that since her mother's death, she would be given the household responsibilities and be leaving her employment immediately.

Tarlana had not been surprised by his words, had in fact been expecting it. But it had still slightly depressed her to know that she would no longer be able to enjoy the camaraderie and distraction of her work place. It was likely that she would continue to fulfil her mother's until Kanzeesh took a wife.

In a way, she welcomed the distraction of the constant work because it brought a much needed distraction from the painful throbbing in her chest, which had become her near constant companion. It would intensify at the oddest of times. When she found a familiar cooking implement. When she stoked the fire messily and embers flew on to the floor and she expected to hear her mother's gentle chiding. Of course, it never came.

She felt her mother's absence most painfully during the long, lonely hours of the day when she was left alone. Despite the amount of effort she might expend in the sweeping of the floor or the scrubbing of the table, she would always feel the ache's dull throb.

So had the doorstep had become the bane of her life – always needing a brush, but never remaining pristine. It was her constant bugbear, seeming symbolic of the pain in her heart. No matter how hard she worked, it never went and always needed more work to force away the pain.

The evenings were easier, when she had the welcome distraction of caring for her father and brothers. Though even then, she missed the gentle conversation of her mother.

Her father and brothers always left for the tavern after the evening meal, leaving Tarlana alone to clean up. Such moments had been precious before her mother's death, a chance to laugh and relax with her sisters. But now the time seemed endless and lonely as she sat by the dying fire, dwelling upon how much their home had changed in the past few months.

If she was being honest with herself, she knew that she did not just miss her mother. She missed Karna. Dreadfully.

Tarlana had always been the logical one, lacking the imagination of her sisters. But then, even Karlis had only dreamed about falling in love and playing house. It had always been Karna who had turned them into thieves or princesses, pirates or birds. She had always enlivened conversations and been able to see other possibilities beyond what was presented.

By comparison, Tarlana had always accepted life and what was expected of her. She had never been disappointed because she did not expect anything else to happen. She knew her place in this world and she accepted it.

Excepting the one time she had seen Prince Rabadash and become infatuated with him, she had never been a daydreamer or fantasised in any way. That silly fascination had been firmly swept aside when she had seen the consequences of Karna's rejected engagement.

In her head, she knew that the sister's imagination and penchant for dreaming had often led to stubbornness and distraction from her work. But at the same time, it was Karna's conversation that had lightened up the tedium of long work days and enabled her to see things from a different perspective.

Though she knew it was foolish, Tarlana had a desire, deep within her heart. She _had_ to see her beloved sister, just once more. The fear of not knowing what had happened to her had kept not just herself, but also Karlis awake many nights.

Gathering her resolve, she placed the scrubbing brush firmly back in its bucket and closed their front door. She would visit Karlis and between them, they _must_ be able to find a way to meet with their sister a final time.

* * *

At the insistence of Lord Peridan, Karna had remained in her room for the evening, contemplating her choice with a very troubled heart. At one point she had been certain about her resolution, but then after an hour of certainty a doubt had crept into her mind and she had once more been back to square one.

She had awakened feeling refreshed. After a quiet morning meal she had been hoping to speak with Master Timeon at some length, when she became aware of a commotion outside her room. Many doors were being opened and there was a definite babble of voices inside the normally tranquil house.

Curiosity getting the better of her, she pressed her ear to the door and was able to make out some phrases.

"Finally found!"

"Dressed like a Calormene slave, apparently."

"States that he can't remember where he's been."

Prince Corin! Oh praise Tash he was safe! Karna said a silent prayer of thanks before returning to sit by the window once more. She had taken to watching the action in the street during her hours of contemplation, but she knew that she must make a decision soon.

Tarkhaan Abramman had mentioned coming for her in only three days yesterday. Which meant that she had just two days to decide. But then Master Timeon had offered her a home and an entirely new life with him on his farm. He had offered to care for her, even love her as a daughter.

The sweetness of this offer had deeply touched her. To finally have a man treat her like a daughter and show her how a father was meant to act … but would he be able to? Timeon had spoken so fondly of his daughter Gwen. Would he expect her to act as Gwen would have? Was he looking for a substitute for his daughter in her?

Would it not be better to be Tarkheena Menelay's companion and enjoy a life of ease and security?

Karna stood up in frustration and returned to her established habit of pacing. She kept going around in circles. If only she could speak to someone outside of this … her sisters. How she longed to see them, to speak to them one more time and discuss the wisest decision for her future.

Though she was not sure how long she had paced for, it seemed quite a length of time has passed when a knock stopped her in the middle of a circuit.

"Come in!" she called.

Peridan entered with a strange expression on his face. He was clearly experiencing a strong emotion, but seemed to be unsure whether he was excited, fearful or anguished.

"My lord!" she exclaimed, "Are you well? I thought that I had heard Prince Corin's return?"

The Narnian lord sighed. "Yes, that is true enough Karna. His highness is safely within our care once more. We found him in the market of all places, dressed like a common slave."

"Then why are you so distressed?" she asked, stuck for a better word.

Peridan actually laughed and rubbed his forehead nervously. "There is much to do and say, Karna. I am afraid you will need to make a decision sooner than expected, but it must be made in the greatest of secrecy."

He gently asked her to sit down and requested a beverage as he gathered his thoughts. Struck by his obvious concern, Karna hurried to do as he bid her and brought a cooled glass of ale.

She listened in silence as he related the conversation that had just been had between the king and queen. Though it slightly surprised her to hear of the queen's decision, she did not blame her and listened earnestly to their plan.

"So you mean to sail in secrecy with the evening tide?" she qualified.

Peridan nodded.

"And you will leave and never return?" her voice broke at the last word and turned her face.

She struggled to maintain her composure as the reality of her words sunk in. She would _never_ see him again. The Narnians would never be able, or wish, to return to Tashbaan after this. To do so would risk open war.

"Karna?" Peridan's voice was quiet but heavy with emotion. "Please, look at me."

She forced herself to look up and was torn apart by the pain in his eyes. She noticed for the first time what a strange colour they were. Part blue, part grey and part green. But now they were dark with longing and pain. She could see his inner turmoil so clearly.

"I don't know what to do," her voice cracked. She felt tears starting to threaten. "I'm so afraid, Peridan."

"I know," he whispered. "I know how confusing this must be and now we've even taken the relief of a few days' rest from you."

"What should I do?" she begged. "Please tell me what I should do. I don't know. I just don't know anymore. I keep going around in circles. I wish …"

"What do you wish?"

"I wish that I could speak with my sisters. I know that they could advise me. They know me better than anyone on this earth."

"Would it help you to speak with them?"

Karna paused at the change in topic. "Could you arrange that, my lord?"

Peridan considered. "It would take planning, but I believe that I can sort a meeting. Would this help you to make a decision?"

"Yes. I am sure it would."

He nodded. "Then I will arrange it at once. Please, stay here and do not leave. I will speak to you as soon as I have made arrangements."

Without another word, he strode off, only realising that he had not answered her question when he was half way down the corridor.

* * *

For the rest of that day, the Narnian delegation had to pack subtly. Much time was spent in either making obvious gestures such as visiting market stalls or speaking of entertainments. Or in the quiet sorting of belongings.

King Edmund had been forced to attend a wrestling match that he had already agreed to observe with Prince Rabadash. It took all of his skills as a courtier to maintain a placid façade and act the part that was expected of him. When the truth was that his mind was awhirl with plans and stratagems for that night.

"I understand that you are preparing a great feast in my honour, King Edmund?" the prince commented as they shared a glass of wine during an interval.

"Indeed, my lord prince," Edmund replied. "Master Tumnus wished to throw a great banquet in your honour on our ship, the _Splendour Hyaline._ "

"Dining on board is certainly a novelty," the prince agreed. "Is there any special reason for this great feast? Might I expect to hear some news that will be pleasurable to my hearing?"

"I cannot answer that question, prince," the Narnian king carefully replied. "You must wait for the banquet. It will be splendid."

"I understand that many entertainers have been employed for the occasion."

"Indeed. How did your highness come to here of this?"

The prince smiled slyly. "Let us just say that I have ears and eyes throughout this city, my lord king," he replied cryptically.

While he maintained an outward calm, Edmund had not missed the veiled threat and felt an iciness grip his heart.

"I would expect no less from the crown prince, your majesty," he replied with a tight smile.

Thankfully, he was spared any further conversation by the recommencement of the wrestling.

Every minute of that morning had dragged as Karna sat, waiting in anticipation of Lord Peridan's return. She had remained quietly, her heart jumping at every noise.

She could hear a great deal of conversation and loud banging coming from the house as furniture and possessions were moved in "preparation" for the great feast.

Every second she expected the prince to come charging in, fully aware of the plan that was being hatched by the Narnians to deceive him.

Her heart felt full as she waited, knowing that Lord Peridan would fulfil his word. He _always_ did. He had never failed her.

Would she fail him?

She paused. He had never told her his opinion, but she believed that she knew it.

The knocking was so quiet that she didn't hear it at first. It came again and she spun to look at the door.

"Come in," she called.

The door opened with a loud creak. A small face peered round and Karna felt her insides contract. "Tamara!" she exclaimed.

Her old friend beckoned. "You must come at once Karna," she whispered. "I have a shawl to hide your face. We must hurry so you are not seen."

Karna nodded and allowed her friend to slip the shawl over her head so that is covered her. They made their way swiftly through the house, avoiding the hurrying figures of servants and nobility alike. Tamara led her down a flight of stairs that opened to the gardens and out a side door. It was a rougher part of the garden where the gardeners kept their tools and equipment.

Lord Peridan was waiting.

He nodded his head to Tamara by way of thank you. She bobbed a quick curtsey before turning to Karna, her expression pensive.

"May Tash guide your steps, my friend," she whispered. She hugged Karna quickly before hurrying up the steps and back into the house.

Karna approached Peridan eagerly. "My lord?" she prompted.

He nodded and led the way to a deserted outbuilding. He gestured her to enter and Karna obeyed.

She had only glanced around at the dusty interior before two figures flung their arms around her. Immediately Karna returned the embrace of her sisters, feeling tears start to roll down her cheeks. She eventually pulled back to stare into their beloved faces. Karlis was also crying. Tarlana smiled softly at her.

"Oh my dear sisters, oh delights of my eyes! I thought I would never see you again!" she exclaimed, hugging them both.

They both returned the embrace. Karlis held her face in her hands for a time, wiping away the tears.

"We are here, oh my sister," she replied. "We had to see you one last time."

"Have the Narnians welcomed you?" Tarlana asked.

Karna nodded. "They have sworn to protect me. I have been fed, protected … they have even offered me shelter."

"You mean they will take you to Narnia?" Karlis gasped.

Karna nodded. "If I wish it."

Her sisters stared at her.

"But Karna, do you have any other choice?" Tarlana stated, "What life will you have here if you remain?"

Their older sister explained Menelay's offer as clearly as she could. They were both silent as the choice she faced sunk in.

"So you either leave with the Narnians or travel to Jezeera with your godmother?" Karlis summed up.

Karna nodded. "I have so very little time," she said, "I have been going round in circles for hours. Ever since I have known of my two alternatives." She started to tremble slightly. "I am so afraid, my sisters. What if I make the wrong decision?"

"Karna, what is your heart telling you?" Karlis demanded. "If there was ever a time to listen to the deepest desires of your heart, it is _now_."

"But what if I'm wrong?" Karna exclaimed. "What if all I dream for turns out to be smoke and mirrors? Has the poet not said that "To follow one's heart is to end in ruin"?"

"The poet has also said that, "To follow fear is to follow the path to destruction", Tarlana interjected dryly.

Resolutely, she took Karna's hands and forced her to look into her face. "My sister, I need you to listen to me. I am the logical daughter. I always have been. I have done my duty and never complained. I have always known my place in life. I know where I belong. Karlis has found where she belongs. She has a husband who loves her and a future." She exchanged a knowing look with their younger sister that mystified Karna.

"But you, my sister, have never fit in. You have never belonged here. You have too much heart, too much spirit and passion to live the life you want, not the one your upbringing was meant to prepare you for. You have brought such colour and vibrancy to our lives because of who you are. If you remain here, you will lose yourself, Karna. You belong in Narnia with those who have accepted you and offered you a home. Remember what Mother said, "Live the life that you have dreamed of". My sister, you know where your dreams will lead you. Go to Narnia. Leave this place and dare to fulfil your dreams."

There was a long pause when Tarlana finished speaking. Karna stared at her kind, gentle face and saw the strength beneath her care-worn expression. Before her stood one of the only people who truly understood her. These two, dear girls who were now women. Showing a wisdom that she knew she at times lacked.

She glanced over at her younger sister and saw the same strength, the same love.

"Do you agree with Tarlana, Karlis?"

The young wife nodded. "I do, my sister. I have done ever since I spoke to Lord Peridan on that dreadful night. I saw his face when he thought that he might have lost you. He was haunted. I don't just think that you will find a new life in Narnia, I think you will find love and a future."

Slowly, she moved her hand to her belly. "As I have with my Ahoz."

Karna's eyes widened. "Karlis, are you with child?"

Her sister's delighted grin was all the answer she needed. Unable to restrain herself, Karna gave a whoop of joy and hugged her sister, who couldn't help laughing.

"How long have you known?"

"Only a few days. Ahoz has been treating me as though I'm fragile."

Karna's delight softened to a smile. "I am so happy for you."

"Thank you, Karna."

Slowly, their joy faded as they realised that their time was running out. Tarlana glanced over her shoulder.

"We must shortly depart," she said. "Have you made your decision, Karna?"

Their older sister nodded. "I know my choice."

"Then you will go?" Karlis prompted.

Karna looked at her for a long time. "I will."

Both her sisters smiled gently and walked forward.

Karlis hugged her first. "You will be so happy," she said. "I know you will. Just know, my dearest sister, we will never forget you and we will always love you."

Karna held Karlis' face in her good hand and kissed her forehead gently. "I will, dear one," she replied. "Please thank Ahoz for saving my life, I don't have the words …"

"I would do it again tomorrow," Karlis replied fiercely.

With a final hug, she stepped away.

Tarlana and Karna embraced for a long time before they finally pulled away.

"I will miss you so much," Tarlana stated. "You have given me hope, Karna. I know that I can accept my life and find contentment, but you have helped me to see that there is always another side to situations, there can be joy and happiness."

"Never stop looking for it, my sister," Karna agreed. "I will miss you too. I love you and I am sorry that I will not see you married. But I know you will be."

Tarlana sniffed and stared at Karna's face for a long time before she kissed her cheek.

"Good bye, my sister," she murmured before turning and leaving. Karlis followed, glancing back once more before she also left.

Karna was alone.

Suddenly bereft, she sat upon a wooden barrel and sobbed. She was now sure of the decision she was making, but her heart yearned for the family she would never see again. She wept bitterly, oblivious to her surroundings until she felt a pair of arms pulling her to a warm, strong chest.

Peridan simply held her, giving her strength as she grieved for her lost family.

Eventually, he smoothed a gentle hand over her dark hair. Karna closed her eyes, soothed by the gesture.

"I am so sorry," he said. "But did the meeting help?"

Karna nodded as she gathered her composure. Embarrassed, she wiped her eyes and managed to meet his concerned gaze.

"Yes," she replied. "I have made my decision."

Peridan looked at her for a long moment. "What is it?"

"Would you answer a question before I tell you, my lord?"

"Of course."

"What would you have suggested I did?"

He hesitated before he replied. "Does my opinion matter so much to you?"

Karna gasped. "How can you even ask that, my lord? Of course your opinion matters! You are the one who has protected me and been the truest friend I have ever known. It was you …" She swallowed hard. "It was you who first showed me what it meant to properly dream. Not only that, it was you who encouraged me to never give up on my hopes for the future."

Peridan found it hard to speak as he took in her words. "I never want you to stop dreaming, Karna," he stated. "It's your vibrancy and imagination that first … that first drew me to you. Promise me you will never change, whatever your decision."

Karna nodded, wondering what he truly meant. "What … what was your advice going to be?"

"I want you to come," he said simply. "I have fought with myself and for what might be better for you by the world's standards, but I cannot give that advice. Please come to Narnia, Karna. Please come … with me."

She stared at him. "With you, my lord?"

"Aye, with me."

Finally, Peridan could stand it no longer. He gathered her to him and kissed her hair. "I love you, Karna. I wasn't willing to admit it to myself for a long time, but finally I know the truth. I love you and I cannot bear the thought of leaving you behind. Please, come home with me. Come home to Narnia."

Karna gently drew back and stared up at this man. This strong, wonderful man who had once seemed so strange and exotic. This brave knight who had protected and sheltered her. Sworn to look after her when he barely knew her. This courageous lord who had risked so much to ensure she was safe and well.

This extraordinary man who was now staring at her as though she was a precious jewel. With such tenderness and love.

"Yes," she said. "I will come with you, Peridan. I have never met anyone like you and … I love you too."

When she spoke these simple words, Karna finally understood why she had been so troubled. She had been fighting, her head against her heart and now it seemed her heart had well and truly vanquished.

With incredible gentleness, Peridan cupped her chin in his rough palm and raised her head. Karna had never been kissed before, but she was certain that nothing would ever compare to the feel of his lips against hers. It was only a soft touch, but she felt her heart skip a beat as his hand stroked her cheek.

Eventually, they drew back and smiled at each other. Peridan was beaming in a way she had never seen. She was struck by how well heart-felt delight became his features. He seemed years younger.

Peridan stepped forward to drop a final kiss on her lips before drawing her hand to rest it in the crook of his arm.

Finally at ease for the first time in days, Karna allowed him to lead her from the garden.

* * *

Author's note:

Sigh! Well folks we finally got there! I knew I had to include this or I would've had pitchforks pointed at me (well maybe metaphorical ones, but still!). Was it worth the wait?

I hope it was! This was still hard to write, but I found that once I got into the groove it flowed much better than the 'Peridan realising feelings' debacle of a few chapters ago! By the way, cannot recommend classical writers enough to get inspiration for this type of writing - Miss Austen, Mr Dickens and Mrs Burney really helped me with the wording and ideas!

Also, re-reading the 'Shasta with the Narnians' chapter in HHB would be very helpful to put this chapter in place chronologically. This was more focussed on the Karna/Peridan romance/choice angle. The action will recommence next chapter I promise!

Also, wanted the title to focus upon that key moment in a person's life when they have a life-changing decision to make.

Please let me know what you think! (I am dying to know!)

As always, thank you SO much for reading and reviewing,

Breeze.


	23. Making Good, One's Escape

Daring to Dream

Chapter 22

Making Good, One's Escape

Prince Corin of Archenland had had a very peculiar day. After finally managing to escape from The Watch for the night, he had scaled the side of the house they were staying in and tumbled into the large communal drawing room on the first floor.

It was there that he had had the greatest surprise. A boy had been lying upon one of the sofas. Dirty, scrawny and dressed in rags, but undoubtedly very similar to himself. He had stared at the boy for a full half minute before being asked by his apparent twin if he was Prince Corin.

In bemusement, he had stated that he was and then discovered that this boy had been mistaken for him! In truth, he hadn't been at all surprised because the more he stared at this stranger, the more he was struck by how great the resemblance was. But then, instead of staying to have some fun, the boy had been most urgent to leave. Corin had only had time to explain how he had entered through the window, before the boy had departed, leaving only a row of dusty foot prints as proof that he had ever been there.

Corin had only just taken a seat upon the sofa when Mr Tumnus came in carrying a change of clothes and a jug of something. He had just started sorting the items he had brought when he took a good look at the prince's face.

"Your highness!" he exclaimed. "How did you come by that black eye? I am certain I didn't miss it when I brought you your meal."

Corin couldn't help laughing. "It wasn't me that King Edmund found, Mr Tumnus! It was my twin! You just missed him."

The faun stared. "Your twin, Prince Corin?"

"Yes. I'm not surprised King Edmund thought that he was me. We do look very alike. But he told me that he was raised in Calormen and is escaping across the desert with a talking horse called Bree."

"A talking horse called Bree? Raised in Calormen?"

Poor Mr Tumnus was very confused as he tried to take it all in.

"So it wasn't your highness that I brought the meal to?"

Corin shook his head. "No, it was a Calormen boy who looked like me. Could you please bring me something to eat, Mr Tumnus? I haven't eaten since yesterday luncheon you know."

Quickly, the prince shared his own experience of the past twenty-four hours and was surprised by how grave the normally merry faun grew at the news.

"I say, Mr Tumnus, is everything alright?"

The faun smiled distractedly at the prince before rising. "Everything is fine, my prince. You just lie here and rest. I'll have one of the servants bring you another tray. It would be a good idea for you to wash and change out of those clothes as well, we will be travelling sooner rather than later."

After leaving the prince to his ablutions, Mr Tumnus quickly made his way to the king's chamber. He found King Edmund in the middle of a conversation with Master Tirshan and waited for them to finish.

It had been a difficult twelve hours as excuses had been made for missing that day's activities. As well as trying to put on a decent enough show to convince every Calormene that they were indeed planning a great festivity on board the _Splendour Hyaline_ the following day. Edmund was currently in discussion about the number of dancing girls required.

"Your highness, I would recommend that you order at least twenty."

"I believe that you think our ship to be larger than it truly is, Master Tirshan. We do not have a large enough space below decks to accommodate more than ten dancers comfortably, twelve at the most."

"Why not have the spectacle take place on deck, your majesty? Has the poet not said that diversion for the eye should always be appreciated to the greatest extent?"

The king sighed. "Very well, Master Tirshan. But please, order no more than fifteen dancing girls. We will arrange to have their performance on deck alongside the jugglers."

Their host bowed deeply, unable to hide his smug smile. "To hear is to obey, my lord king. I shall make the arrangements."

He swept from the room in a flurry of expensive silks and a strong waft of musky scent. After taking a moment to wipe his eyes with a handkerchief, Mr Tumnus approached the king.

Edmund gave a knowing smile. "It seems that Master Tirshan can never resist the temptation to haggle, regardless of the situation. What is wrong, Tumnus?" He had noticed the faun's frown.

As quickly as he could, Mr Tumnus shared his conversation with the prince.

The king was deeply concerned. "Do you think he is a Calormene spy?"

The faun shrugged. "I do not know, my king. But I believe that we must make as swift a departure as possible. In truth, I do not believe he can be. Your meeting was so by chance; he also spoke of wishing to escape across the desert with a talking horse."

Edmund nodded. "I agree, but we must step up our plans. Please be so good as to inform her majesty the queen and Lord Peridan about this turn of events. We must move with every possible speed to depart."

Tumnus bowed and quickly left.

* * *

"Truly, your lordship, you will find no sweeter delight this side of Mount Pire," the confectioner fawned as he once more bowed low before Peridan.

The Narnian lord was at his fifth stall of the day, this time sampling sweetmeats and an array of confectionary. The stall owner was cloyingly obsequious as he suggested various samples for him to try.

"No feast would be complete without a large selection of miniature pastries, my lord," he stated.

Peridan thanked him and sampled a mouthful of several delicacies. They were all a variation of sugared nuts and honeyed fruits. Far more palatable to him than some of the proffered treats which had oozed syrup and proven sickeningly sweet.

"How much for a hundred of each sample on this tray?" he inquired.

The confectioner named his price. Peridan knew it was exorbitant but agreed. It would be just as well to recompense the common Calormene folk for their efforts, regardless of whether the event was to take place.

After leaving the bowing confectioner behind him, Peridan decided that he had made his presence obvious enough that day. He had placed several large orders and made the down payment. Now he was eager to return to the house and finish the preparations for leaving.

Although he abhorred artifice like all his kinsman, he also understood the necessity and was able to put of a more believable performance after years as an ambassador. He had long perfected what Edmund called his 'courtier's mask'. The ability of keep a pleasant smile on his face when his inner emotion was very different. It was a skill that had many times enabled him to escape from embarrassing and uncomfortable social situations.

It was for this very reason that he had been sent out to visibly 'make orders' and add to the illusion of their 'great feast' which was to place aboard the ship. He turned to his small group of followers and stated his intent to return home. The relief was palpable, though not clearly visible if you had not known. He nodded to the guide who went ahead of them, crying loudly for space to be made in the crowd for "the barbarian lords of the North".

Peridan followed with an inward sigh. He would certainly not miss being referred to as a 'barbarian' and it would be a relief to walk amongst others without be stared at.

In fact, what he most anticipated was walking through the forest once more and hearing the waves on the shore. He smiled with pleasure at the thought of sharing these things with Karna and showing her his homeland.

She had not been far from his thoughts that day. If possible, she had seemed more alarmed than the rest at the discovery of their plan. Every moment convinced her that she would be seen by a friend of her stepfather's.

The thought cooled the smile on his face and caused a lengthening of stride as he moved towards the house. Every moment making his more urgent to leave this land.

Once within the cool of the entrance hall, Peridan privately chastised himself for growing alarmed and strode of to find King Edmund. He found the him and Mr Tumnus deep in conversation and was soon told of Prince Corin's revelation. The warning was enough to concern them and plans were immediately made to move all the womenfolk and Prince Corin to the _Splendour Hyaline_ at once.

"I will explain the need for urgency to her majesty," the king said. "I believe Miss Karna is with her, if you would like to come?"

Peridan nodded and they quickly entered the queen's chamber. It was a relief to find that the only occupants were the queen, her maid Flora, Karna and the panther guard Dell. Susan was sorting jewellery when they entered and looked up in alarm. Relief flooded her face at the sight of her brother.

"Oh Edmund!" she exclaimed. "I have been so fearful. We aren't sure how to make it seem as though we are only leaving the house for a night. Do you think it wise to leave a few items in the cupboard as a ruse?"

The king considered, "I believe that would be wise, Su. What think you, Peridan?"

The lord nodded. "I would think it a wise move, your highness. Have you two of three gowns that you would not mind leaving?"

The queen nodded. "I have a few. Flora, would you please see to it?"

The maid nodded in reply, her face lacking its normal merriness. It seemed that even Flora's unquenchable positivity was affected by the same dread that held them all.

Peridan glanced at Karna and saw the fear in her face. She had a cloth in her hands that she kept twisting. She almost seemed to be staring into space.

He approached quietly and touched her arm. Karna jumped slightly at the unexpected touch but looked up with undoubtable relief. He took her hand.

"Are you alright?" he murmured.

Karna's fear softened at the concern in his eyes and she managed a weak smile. "No more than anyone else," she replied. "I think we will all feel more at ease when we have left this place."

He nodded. "We will be moving you all within the hour. You will be travelling in the queen's litter."

She nodded but did not reply. Peridan saw the lingering fear in her face and touched her cheek.

"What is it, Karna?"

"How will I be able to travel safely, Peridan? You know every eye will be upon the queen when she leaves. If she has a Calormen attendant, it will make me all the more obvious to the public eye."

"What if the curtains were drawn?"

"None would draw the curtains on such a day."

He frowned. She had a point. Gently placing her hand in the crook on his arm, he led her to join the others.

"My lord king, we have a problem."

The king turned with a frown. "What is it, my lord?"

"How are we to get Miss Karna out of the house and on to the ship without her being seen? She cannot attend Queen Susan, because her majesty's train is always watched and carefully observed wherever she goes."

"What if Karna was to travel incognito?" the queen suggested.

"How do you mean, Su?" her brother enquired.

"I understand that Master Timeon has offered her a home with him?"

They all nodded.

"Then why doesn't she travel by Master Timeon's side to the ship with her face covered and make her way aboard when no-one else is looking? She will be easily missed in the flurry of my departure."

Peridan was unable to help himself as he strode over to hug the queen. "Susan, that is brilliant," he stated. "Thank you."

Surprised, the queen laughed and hugged him back. "I have been known to have good ideas occasionally, Peridan," she replied.

The lord flushed and made to apologise but was quickly waved off by the laughing young woman. Karna stared opened-mouthed at the easy familiarity with which they interacted. They seemed more like siblings than a queen and her ambassador at that moment. She had never seen nobility act in such a manner.

King Edmund took in her shocked expression and laughed. "I'm afraid you have shocked poor Karna with your familiarity," he said.

Peridan and Susan both turned to Karna with a smile.

"You must forgive our informality, Karna," the queen stated. "But you must remember that we have been together since we were youngsters. Our interaction in Narnia is very different to the formal manner with which we conduct ourselves on formal state occasions."

"We have even been known to address each other without our titles during dinners of state," Peridan interjected. The queen smiled but Karna was amazed. She had barely even had such familiarity with her mother and sisters, but to see it between royalty! It seemed that Narnia was a _very_ different land to Calormen indeed!

The rest of the hour was one of careful orchestration as Queen Susan's trunks were carried down and preparations made for her departure. Karna was permitted to change back into her old dress (which had been cleaned) and was pleased to have Master Timeon's company for the final journey.

The older man smiled kindly at her and reassured her that she would come to no harm in his company.

"I have a better knowledge of the back streets thanks to our wanderings," he reassured her. Karna nodded. "I can't tell you how happy I was to hear about your decision," he added gruffly. "I'll have to set about clearing out a room for you."

"A room?" she queried.

"A young lady needs her privacy, Karna and I have two spare rooms beside my own. You can have your choice of which you will prefer."

Karna stared. "A room of my own?" she queried.

Timeon nodded, "Aye. A room and bed of your own."

She was silent for a long moment as the reality sunk in. She was to not only have a new home, but her own bed and ever a _room_ of her own. She was so overcome that she didn't dare to speak. Timeon watched her quietly, allowing her to gather her composure.

When she did speak, however, it was not what he was expecting. "Why?"

He raised an eyebrow. "What, lass?"

"Why, Master Timeon?"

"Why what, Karna?"

"Why are you doing this for me?"

The older man was quiet for a long time before he answered her.

"For many reasons, lass. Firstly, for you, but also for me and lastly for my Gwen."

"But Timeon, I'm not your daughter."

"I know that Karna and I'd never want you to think that I'm trying to make you into her or replace her. But you remind me of her so much. I miss having a young life about the house and I'd appreciate the company, lass. Also don't think that you have to live with me. We'll have a trial when we get to Narnia. It might be that you prefer the company of the young folk up at Cair Paravel over my simple way of living."

Karna smiled. "Simple is the only way I know, Master Timeon."

"Best to cut that 'Master Timeon' out of your vocabulary then, lass. If simple is the only way you know then I'll only ever be Timeon and you'll only ever be Karna. How does that sound?"

"Ideal, Timeon," she replied. The older man nodded and gave her a quick pat upon the shoulder.

Karna waited quietly in the study as the household bustled about, moving possessions and belongings. Eventually, Peridan came and ushered them quickly down a side entrance. He handed Karna the shawl and wrapped it securely around her shoulders. For an endless moment, he held her in his arms and stared into her face.

"I'll see you in a couple of hours," he promised. "Timeon will keep you safe. Just promise me that you'll keep your face hidden and _never_ leave his side."

"I promise," she whispered.

He cupped her face in his hand, unable or unwilling to look away. Karna too was incapable of breaking eye-contact.

"You _will_ be careful," she murmured.

"I will," he assured her. She held her hand against the one that held her cheek. They might have stood there for a long time if Timeon had not cleared his throat.

"We must leave," he stated.

Peridan nodded and kissed her forehead tenderly. Karna reached up a hand to stroke his cheek. He closed his eyes at the contact.

"I'll see you soon," he said as Timeon led the way out on to the street.

Then, they were gone.

* * *

Karna's head was awhirl as they moved quickly through the backstreets, passing from one crowd to the next as they wove steadily through the city towards the river. She had never been to the main docklands of Calormen and her curiosity was active. At the same time, she could still feel the touch of Peridan's lips upon her forehead, the stroke of his hand upon her cheek. It was all so new and … thrilling.

Timeon said little as he led the way. He was intent upon their destination and his mission to try and pass as unsuspiciously as possible through the streets. He also had his face covered by the hood of his cloak and tried to act as naturally as possible as they moved across a more open market square. His main concern was how to get Karna past the guards that monitored the traffic heading to and from the port.

He was still undecided about what he would say when they paused to let a great procession through.

"Way, Way for the Tarkheena Lasaraleen, noblewoman of Tashbaan! Wife of Captain …"

He stopped paying attention as the retinue passed, but he made sure to clasp Karna's hand tightly and lead her away from the curious eyes of a stall holder opposite. They were now about half way to the docklands and he was unsure of the turning. He took them to a passageway and stopped a passing urchin.

"Which direction to the docklands?" he demanded.

The child stared at him before holding up a grubby palm. Timeon quickly placed a copper coin into it.

"Follow me, sir," the boy said and started to lead the way. "For another copper I can get you past the guards, sir. Seems as though you wish to keep your identity hidden."

"Do you know a way, boy?"

The boy regarded him shrewdly and nodded. "Owner of a tavern lets me use her back yard as a passage, master. It backs on to the docklands and you can sneak through a gap in the fence."

Timeon exchanged a glance with Karna. "What do you think?" he asked.

Karna regarded the boy carefully. "What's your name, lad?" she asked.

"Mushta, Miss," he replied.

"If you fulfil your word we will not only give you another copper but buy you dinner at the tavern for a week if you promise that you will not speak a word about our transaction to anyone. Do you agree?"

The boy's eye bugged out. "Agreed, Miss."

Karna nodded and the boy joyfully led the way to the tavern. It was a rickety building that had a scrubby yard that backed on to the docklands. The owner was a sallow-faced widow who greeted them with a knowing look and showed a mouth full of yellow and black teeth when she grinned at the money Timeon gave to buy her silence and Mushta's meals for the next week.

With a final word of thanks to the boy, Karna slid easily through the hole in the fence and followed Timeon out along the docklands.

It was an impressive sight, with many vessels swaying in the ever-moving water of the great river. Timeon led Karna to a large white vessel with the carved head of a white bird at her prow. She marvelled at the size and elegance of so large a vessel. Large silken sails rose up to the mast head and large lanterns sat upon her stern, waiting to be lit. Two men at arms guarded the gang-plank and challenged them to reveal themselves as they approach.

"Lower your hood, friend," the larger of the two men stated. He was older than many of the Narnians, with a full dark beard and heavily tanned face.

Timeon lowered his hood. "Tis I Captain Felsted."

"Timeon! Well met indeed, my friend. It has been many days since we saw you. Who is this young lady?"

"Captain Felsted, may I introduce Miss Karna of Narnia. She is coming aboard as a guest of their majesties."

The captain nodded. "Well met, Miss Karna. It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance. Please come onboard. I have heard from their majesties about the planned entertainment. There are many preparations to be made."

Karna smiled at the captain and moved quickly past the two men and on to the deck. She could not help staring about her in wonder.

Timeon could not repress a smile but ushered her below decks quickly.

"I am sorry to stop your perusal, but it will be much safer for you to remain out of sight until we have departed."

Karna nodded and allowed Timeon to lead her to a small cabin. It had two bunks and a small porthole that looked out upon the port. Timeon left her to help with the stowing of the cargo.

* * *

Susan had always found the Calormen mode of transportation complicated and overly-formal for her tastes, but she had been happy enough to accept it as a visitor in this strange country. On her final day in this foreign place she was glad for the curtains in the litter that allowed her to have a little privacy from the curious eyes of the common people. Flora sat quietly by her side, holding her hand.

"Do you miss riding, Your Highness?" she asked quietly as they drew nearer to the docklands.

The queen managed a tight smile. "Very much," she whispered. "I cannot wait to return to Roe's back."

They had agreed that nothing incriminating was to be said on this journey, for fear that one of the litter bearers might overhear. But Susan could not resist this quiet comment. Flora patted her hand as they approached the entrance gates and were finally set down.

The curtains were drawn back and Susan recognised the stooped figure of the Grand Vizier awaiting her arrival by the gangplank. He held a small box in his hands and wore his usual sycophantic smile.

"Oh lady queen whose beauty does eclipse the sun," he began, bowing so low that the hump on his back was visible. "My master the powerful Prince Rabadash, son of his most royal highness the Tisroc (may he live forever!) has asked me to deliver a gift and a request to your most royal personage."

Susan curtsied slightly. "I thank you for bearing the gift and expressing your task with such eloquence, my lord vizier," she replied. "What request does his highness ask of me?"

"Oh most beauteous and pulchritudinous queen, my master the high Prince Rabadash does request that you accept this gift from your humblest servant and sleep well in the knowledge that his highness highly anticipates tomorrow's feast and celebration."

Susan nodded and accepted the box with a deep inclination of her head. "I thank you for delivering the prince's message and please assure him that I return his wishes for a good night of slumber. I also anticipate tomorrow's celebration with much enjoyment. If your excellency will now kindly excuse my departure, we have many preparations to oversee for the great event."

With that, the Narnian queen made her escape and did not release a sigh of relief until she was safely within the privacy of her cabin. Flora followed her in with a smile and offered her a glass of small ale. Susan nodded and grinned at the entrance of her cat guard.

"Was I convincing enough, Dell?" she asked, taking a sip from her goblet.

"Very believable, Your Majesty. You were your usual courteous and polite self."

"Was the lie obvious?"

"Not at all, Your Highness," Flora reassured her. "You handled the Grand Vizier with your usual eloquence and skill."

The young queen allowed herself a smile. "I think he might have overdone it with his praise on this occasion. Have you ever heard pulchritudinous used in a sentence?"

Flora giggled. "No, my lady. I did wonder at that word, what is its meaning?"

Susan laughed. "Beautiful or comely to look at, so he was, in fact, repeating himself."

Even Dell snorted at that. "Well it does seem to be the Calormene way to use ten words rather than one to express yourself."

The queen smiled. "Flora, would you be so good as to fetch Miss Karna? I do not want her to feel herself abandoned in your cabin. She will face a frightening afternoon and it would be best for her to be amongst company."

The handmaid curtseyed and left. She soon returned with Karna and the rest of the day was spent in sorting belongings and the making of "decorations" for the following day's festivities.

Subtly, the Narnians brought as many possessions on board as they dared. A point was also made of hanging the garlands of greenery from the masts and sails so that any who were looking from the shore would see preparations being made. Various stall owners and tradesman also visited throughout the afternoon and into the evening to discover delivery times for their wares. Between them, both Edmund and Peridan were kept busy sorting the timings of the following day.

What was not seen by the lookouts on the shore was the removal of all spare sailing canvas from lockers beneath deck and the exchanging of the heavy harbour anchor for a light and easily removable one. Captain Felsted was doing everything within his power to prepare his ship for her departure without making it obvious. The sailors were well drilled and every step of their escape was planned and timed.

As darkness fell, Karna was invited to share a light dinner with the Narnian delegation, but found that she lacked any appetite. Mr Tumnus regarded her kindly and offered to order something lighter for her.

Karna smiled, touched by his kindness. "I thank you, sir. But I doubt my appetite will return until we have reached Narnia."

"Too true, my lady," the faun agreed. "I think we will all feel far more at ease when we are safely returned."

Peridan squeezed her hand lightly and pressed her to drink something.

"Might I finish your meal, Miss Karna?" Prince Corin inquired.

Karna could not repress a laugh as King Edmund chastised the prince for indelicacy.

The prince was confused. "But why is it bad manners, Your Highness, if Miss Karna does not wish to finish her meal? I have finished mine and still have space."

"It is not polite to take a lord or lady's food from their plate until the whole table has finished, Corin," Queen Susan explained gently. "You must wait until all are done before you enquire."

"Yes, my lady," the prince replied, though his forlorn expression spoke volumes. Peridan empathised and remembered his own confusion with table etiquette when a young lad. Karna also felt sorry for him and made a point of scraping her remaining meat and vegetables on to his plate when all cutlery was put down.

Eventually the evening meal was finished and she was given a tour of the ship by first Captain Felsted and then Corin (who felt he had discovered many hidden places on their voyage over). Though she could not go on deck until darkness had properly fallen.

At sunset, Karna sat quietly by the porthole in her cabin, watching the sun sink in a glory of pink and gold, her mind lost in memory. This would be her last Calormene sunset. The final time she would see the sky ablaze in the way that only came with the desert's arid climate.

In her mind, she saw the many sunsets that she had watched with her sisters, seated upon the steps by their home. Heard their mother's gentle voice calling them in for the evening.

Now her mother was dead. Her youngest sister was to be a mother and Tarlana was to keep home for her father. So much had changed in such a short space of time.

It was fully dark by the time she heard a knock on the door. She turned and saw Peridan standing there.

"It's time," he stated, his expression gentle. "I thought you would want to be up on deck when we leave, but you must be completely silent."

Karna nodded and allowed him to pull her up from her seat. She followed him silently on to the deck and took a seat towards the stern, out of everyone's way but from a position that would enable her to see the action.

Almost like a choreographed dance, Captain Felsted's men silently cast off the mooring ropes and pushed the _Splendour Hyaline_ away from the dock. She cut effortlessly through the water and started heading out to sea. Noiselessly, her great silken sails climbed up to the mast as they started to catch the wind.

"Quite a sight aren't they?" Peridan murmured in her ear as they left Tashbaan and her port far behind. Karna nodded but was still nervous.

Fearfully, she watched the departing shore for any signs of warning. But not a light, not a voice could be heard in that sleeping city as the Narnians made their escape. All lights on the ship were carefully shrouded as they sailed away, using only the moon's light as a guide.

Slowly, Karna rose from her seat and stood, staring back at the sleeping city that had been her home for eighteen years. She felt a gentle hand on her shoulder and looked up into Peridan's face. It was black and white in the moonlight, drained of all colour. But she could see the tenderness in his eyes. It warmed her heard.

"How are you feeling?" he asked.

She pondered his question for a moment. "Nervous, scared, excited, happy …" she replied. "That's all I've ever known." She gestured to Tashbaan. "I don't know what lies ahead or what may happen in the future … I've never felt so directionless …"

"I know it's frightening," he said, gently drawing her to him. "But you know something of what is to come. A life of freedom. No-one forcing you to marry against your will. A life of plenty and, I hope, happiness."

Karna smiled in the darkness, settling back into the warmth of his embrace. "Definitely happiness," she agreed. "And excitement. I feel as though I can breathe for the first time in five days."

"Me too," he murmured, resting his chin on her head. "But we must still be cautious, we aren't back in Narnian waters yet."

"We will make it," she said, certain. "I know we will."

Peridan smiled, burying his faith in her hair for a moment. "Then I will trust in your faith … my love."

Karna felt her heart warm at the endearment and kissed the arm that held her too him.

 _Finally_ she was starting to feel as though she might actually achieve the dream she had held for so long.

* * *

Author's note:

Bit of a tense chapter but they got out! (As you probably guessed they would, given I am keeping this accurate to canon.)

I hope Corin provided the comic relief he was meant to, he is really fun to write and I thoroughly enjoyed writing what I call "Corin moments".

Hope the development of Karna and Peridan's relationship was also believable (they are easier to write now I've done all the feeling confession bit!).

I also cannot believe this but I have got the end in sight. We still need to sort the battle, drama and Rabadash, etc. also Karna needs to land in Narnia, be shocked, etc. But I believe that Chapter 25 will be the last!

Also, I am planning to finish this by the end of the summer. As you will probably have guessed I have lots of weeks of holiday ahead for writing so we will see. Hopefully I can finish this by 1st September!

Again, HUGE thanks to Mel, AshenSing and I'm guessing Anyabar (?) or Kilgharrah (?) for reviewing the last chapter. PLEASE let me know what you think because I would love to know your opinion now they are finally together.

As always, thank you for every favourite, view, review and people who put this story on their alerts list, it means the world!

Breeze.


	24. Homeward Bound

Daring to Dream

Chapter 23

Homeward Bound

As the sun rose above the horizon, Lord Peridan of Narnia watched it with a contemplative gaze. He had been up for most of the night, pacing the deck and taking in large lungfuls of salty sea air, trying to convince himself (and his stomach) that he did not feel nauseous.

He was failing.

By way of a distraction, he had sought conversation with those also on deck. But as all were either on duty or suffering from a similar ailment, the attempts had not really helped.

He had taken Karna to her cabin about an hour after Tashbaan had vanished from view and had been walking about the ship ever since. He had only paused now to watch the sunrise, which was shrouded in cloud and more of a lightening of the darkness than anything else.

He cast his mind back, marvelling at the difference a week could make. Just seven days ago, Queen Susan had still been seriously considering the prince's suit. Karna had simply been a Calormene servant girl that he was helping. Her mother had been alive.

Now they were several leagues out to sea, fleeing for their very lives.

In truth, he wasn't certain about what this act of fleeing meant for Narnia's political future. Any forthcoming trade agreements between the nations would be impossible and they had certainly offended and enraged the future monarch of a very powerful neighbour. It was true that they had the desert and Archenland as a means of protection, but he would be lying if he did not admit to being concerned about what Rabadash's next action might be.

They had discussed the danger of their situation at length, but in the end it had been the queen's safety that had forced their hand. The very notion of their fair queen being forced into marriage was abhorrent to all the party and so they had been left little choice. Peridan and Edmund had both agreed that being the wife to such a man would have crushed Susan's gentle heart.

Yet, despite the danger of their situation, he could never regret this visit. Without it, he would never have met _her_.

Peridan sighed, marvelling at the journey he had been on over the past six weeks.

He had come to Calormen as a learned and knowledgeable diplomat, clear and certain about what the trip would entail. In that time, his world had been turned upside down by Karna and he knew that his life would never be the same again.

He had never looked to fall in love, had never experienced such emotion before. In the end, it had taken Sallowpad's urgings for him to even realise the turn that his feelings had taken. But now, he was bewildered and amazed by what she inspired in him. And most unbelievably of all, she felt the same way.

He wanted nothing more than to show her all the special places in Narnia. To introduce her to Lucy and Peter, to Mr and Mrs Beaver and all his friends. To even take her to Archenland and introduce her to Per and show her the place he had been born …

Peridan marvelled. He had never been especially close to his older brother and certainly not since the death of their father. In truth, he had fled from the memory of their father's estate and Archenland when he had died. But maybe it was time for him to face his demons and return.

He pondered many things as he watched the sky lighten. His childhood in Archenland. His journey to join the young monarchs of the newly freed Narnia twelve years ago. His life since at the Narnian court. This new phase of life now that Karna was returning with them … to the question he knew he would one day ask her …

"Good morning, my lord."

Peridan jerked out of his daze.

"Good morning, Timeon. I trust you slept well?"

"Yes, I thank you. Yourself?"

Peridan sighed. "As well as I can, given our current mode of transportation."

Timeon nodded, slightly amused. "I expected as much, my friend. I have brought you some tea. It contains a herb that will help with the sea sickness."

The lord accepted the cup gratefully. "Thank you, Timeon. I had forgotten your magic remedy. We ran out on our voyage over."

"I stocked up in Tashbaan. I am afraid you are not the only person to suffer from the affliction. I have just come from Karna."

Peridan's heart lurched. "She is ill?"

Timeon nodded. "I just saw her. Rest and plenty of liquids will be her cure; I have told her as much."

"I should go to see her."

The older man stayed him with a hand. "You saw her last night, Peridan. Allow her to sleep. That is all the cure she needs."

The lord nodded, though he was not convinced.

They spent the better part of an hour discussing the likelihood of pursuit with Captain Felsted and were relieved to hear that none of the Tiscroc's ships could compare to the _Splendour Hyaline_ for speed.

"We'll beat them, right enough," the seaman assured them. "Even if they started first thing this morning they'd have no hope of catching us with such a good north westerly wind as we have."

"That eases my heart, Captain," Peridan replied. "I will inform his highness."

He went carefully down the ladder and found Edmund studying a chart in his study.

"Good morning, sire."

The dark-haired king glanced up. "Good morning to you, my lord. I trust you bring me good news of our voyage?"

"There is no way they could catch us with such a wind," Peridan assured him.

"That is well," Edmund replied. "I have been working out how long it would take to attack over land and we have at least three days by my calculations."

"Surely they would be waylaid in Archenland by King Lune, Edmund? He would never allow a large force to charge unchallenged across his lands."

"That is true, but my heart warns of some manoeuvre of Rabadash's we have not yet foreseen."

"We can know nothing until we have arrived safely. Speculation is fruitless."

The king sighed. "That is true. But it is hard not to guess after leaving in such secrecy."

"Her majesty is safe, that is all we need be concerned with."

Edmund again nodded, but his mind was elsewhere.

"Tell me honestly, Peridan. In your opinion, what will be the consequences of this action?"

The ambassador took a seat and they began a frank discussion of the likely political ramifications.

* * *

 _She was walking through the back streets of Tashbaan. On her right, she passed their local well and knew that she must be on her way home from work. But where were Tarlana and Karlis? With quickening steps, she approached the door, anticipating her mother's warm welcome. Eagerly, she opened it._

" _Mother? Have you seen Karlis and Tarlana?"_

 _The first room was empty. A stew bubbled on the fire. The table was set for seven._

" _Mother?"_

 _She pushed through to the bedroom and stopped._

 _Mother lay upon the mattress, obviously dead. Karlis and Tarlana knelt beside her, their faces streaked with tears. Karna fell to her knees and reached for a cold, withered hand._

" _You did this." Tarlana stared at her accusingly. "You killed our mother."_

" _Why did you have to be so selfish, Karna?" Karlis demanded. "If it wasn't always about you, Mother might be alive."_

" _But I couldn't …" Karna exclaimed. "You nursed Mother, Tarlana. You know how ill she became."_

" _Only because you bought in those foreign men. They gave her a strange disease."_

" _But it wasn't my fault! I couldn't do anything!"_

" _Oh yes you could, you bastard." Karna turned and saw Tarneesh standing in the doorway. His face was blank and his fists were raised. "It's all your fault. If only your mother had allowed you to be drowned as she should have, she would still be alive. It's your fault!"_

 _He slapped her across the face. Karna fell._

" _It's your fault!"_

"NO!" Karna sat bolt upright, knocking her head upon the bunk above her. She was soaked in sweat and so wrapped up in her blankets that they were like a net around her legs. Fearfully, she looked about the cabin, taking in the carved walls and daylight dancing off the swinging lantern.

The door slid open and she saw Flora watching her with concern.

"Are you alright?" the maid asked, "I was only gone for a few minutes to get you some water." She knelt down and offered Karna a plain goblet. "Would you like some?"

Karna nodded and gulped the liquid greedily, still shaken from the dream.

"Did you have a nightmare?"

She lowered the goblet and looked at the floor. "My stepfather and sisters were blaming me for Mother's death. They said it was my fault …" Hastily, she wiped away that tears that came to her eyes.

Flora took her hand and smiled at her gently. "Karna, you must not blame yourself. This whole thing is no more your fault than it is the queen's. Things happen and we have to deal with the consequence of our choices. But who knows if events would have turned out for the better if we had chosen to act differently?"

She nodded, feeling slightly better.

"Now, how are you feeling?" Flora asked more briskly, all business again.

Karna considered. "I am no longer sick, but my head is hurting and I feel dizzy."

Flora felt her forehead and frowned. "You're very hot. I'll send for Master Timeon. Lie back down and I'll fetch you some more water."

Karna did as instructed and felt a little better, though the dream still haunted her.

Was she, in part, to blame for her mother's death? The rational part of her refuted this allegation entirely, but a small part of her did question her actions.

Wasn't it fair to consider her actions driven by selfishness rather than the passion that Peridan claimed it was? If she had married Lavarin, rather than pushing her own selfish agenda, would her mother now be alive?

And what if Narnia wasn't what she hoped it would be? What if she was seen as a strange outsider who had no place at their court? What if Peridan came to regret his decision and didn't love her anymore?

For the next few minutes, Karna allowed her panic to overcome her better reason as the fever took hold. While Flora searched for Timeon, his patient was becoming more and more hysterical as every irrational fear become real in her growing delirium.

By the time Timeon arrived, Karna was out of bed and half way to being convinced that her mother's death was her fault. He recognised the symptoms of the fever at once and forced Karna back into the bunk, ignoring her rambled confessions and panic.

"Pay her no heed," he instructed Flora. "The fever is making her delirious. Would you please pass me my satchel?"

Soon, he had brewed a calming draught and managed to make Karna drink it. She eventually fell into a more peaceful sleep and was left to the handmaid's able care.

He quickly made his way to the king's cabin and explained her condition. Peridan was quick to rise, saying he would see her.

"There is no point, my lord," Timeon stated. "She is delirious and in need of rest. Flora is taking good care of her."

"What has caused this illness, Timeon?" the queen asked.

The healer sighed. "I am afraid that the sea sickness weakened her immune system enough to allow the infection. She will be fine after several days of rest and plenty of fluids."

Peridan privately glowered at the wall. As though there was not enough to be concerned about already, he now needed to add worry about Karna's health to the list.

"She will be fine, my friend," the king assured him. The lord nodded, but he was not convinced.

In the end, the fever did eventually break and Peridan was allowed to visit her (though only every few hours). She was diligently cared for by Susan and Flora, who took it in turns. Gradually she became strong enough to come up on deck, though only for a few minutes at a time and she always had to be carried (invariably in Peridan's arms).

However, though Karna required constant care, the distraction seemed helpful rather than a nuisance to the queen. But, though she would not admit it, Susan's eyes were frequently searching the sea behind them, seeking for any sign of pursuit. Neither was her sleep as restful as it would be when they had landed safely at Cair Paravel. So, caring for Karna enabled her to focus her attentions and energies upon something far more productive.

They had long discussions about Cair Paravel and the surrounding countryside. Susan could speak for long hours about her home and Karna seemed particularly entranced when she spoke about the various characters and creatures they were likely to meet.

"I have only met Mistress Dell," Karna replied. "I am not certain how to speak to the other talking beasts of Narnia."

"If you address them with the same respect that you address Mr Tumnus or myself, you cannot go far wrong," the queen assured her. "Every race of talking beast has a particular role that they are happy to contribute to our life in Narnia. For example, the large cats such as Dell serve in the army or as body guards. The moles are very gifted in gardening and were helping in the cultivation of an orchard before we left. I imagine the trees will all be planted and thriving by now."

"How large is the human population, your highness?"

"Not very large. Only about a quarter of our court's population is human."

"But I understand that none are Narnian born?"

"No, the majority of our human population come from Archenland or the islands in the Great Eastern Sea. Myself and my siblings came from another land outside of this world."

Karna's eye widened, "Another land, your majesty?"

"Yes. I do not remember it very well, but we came through Ward Robe and Spare Oom."

The Calormene maiden marvelled. She had not realised just how magical the Narnian monarchs were. To come from a land outside of this? Who knew what strange magic ran through their blood?

By the third day of their voyage, Karna managed to ascend the stairs herself and enjoyed the satisfaction of being able to look out over the sea. Peridan had remained watchfully by her side but was pleased to see the gradual improvement in her strength.

"There is Terebinthia," he said, pointing to a dark lump off their starboard side. "We passed it a few hours ago."

"Passing Terebinthia means we're within a day's sailing of Cair," Captain Felsted stated with satisfaction.

"What is Terebinthia like, Captain?" Karna asked, trying to picture the island.

"Very green and covered in hills, Miss," the seaman replied. "You can always be sure of a ready welcome on Terebinthia. Great fishermen they are. No-one knows the seas quite like them for predicting the movement of shoals."

She nodded and watched the distant isle pass, marvelling at how little she had actually seen of the world.

The rest of the day passed in a pleasant mixture of conversation and watching the shoreline pass. Karna had observed the changing landscape as the sandier steppes of Calormen gradually changed to the more wooded plains of Archenland.

As the dusk was starting to fall, she was distracted by a shout from above.

"Your highness, you should not be up here!"

Far up in the crow's nest, she watched a figure that could only be Prince Corin emerge and shimmy down the shrouds with alarming speed, closely followed by a sailor. Unable to withhold a giggle, she watched the boy descend the rope ladder with the agility of a monkey and come to a grinning (albeit slightly guilty) halt at the bottom, right in front of King Edmund. The sailor dropped by the prince a few moments later and placed a heavy hand on his shoulder.

"Your majesty," the seaman stated. "I cannot be expected to keep a proper look out when his young highness insists on climbing the rigging as though he were a monkey. This ship is not a playground for children!"

"But sire I only wished to measure the distance to Cair …" the prince began, but was silenced by a look from the king.

"By the mane, Prince Corin! You have to learn that while courage is an estimable virtue to have, it must be paired with sound judgement. What would I have told your royal father if you had fallen and broken your neck?"

"But I can climb well."

"I do not doubt that. But for the sake of the crew's (and my) sanity, you are hereby confined to the deck for the remainder of the voyage, do I make myself clear?"

The prince lowered his head contritely.

"I am sorry, sire."

The king's anger softened somewhat. "I know you are. But it is better to think before you act, Prince."

" _Cair Paravel in sight!_ "

Every eye turned to the shoreline and for the first time, Karna felt her heart leap with excitement. They had finally arrived!

The nearer they were to Cair Paravel, the further open Karna's mouth fell. Though she had seen many splendid buildings in Tashbaan, nothing could prepare her for the stately beauty of the castle. Its snow-white walls shone in the late evening light, as it stood majestically above the long bay of golden sand far beneath it. Numerous towers rose above the main building, dotted with a hundred lights glimmering through the windows.

"In all my wildest imaginings, I could never have dreamed of such a place," she marvelled.

She felt a hand on her shoulder and glanced up to see Peridan smiling down at her.

"Is it all you hoped?" he asked.

She returned the smile warmly. "More than I could have imagined," she replied.

"Well we're just entering the harbour now." As he spoke, all the sails started to fall as they were carefully lowered by the crew. "I suspect the beavers will have seen that dinner was prepared."

"Beavers?" she queried.

He laughed. "Mr and Mrs Beaver, the true hearts of Cair Paravel. Nothing goes on within its walls that they don't know about."

Gradually, Captain Felsted eased the _Splendour Hyaline_ into the harbour and moored her comfortably against several fenders (set up to protect her paint from being scraped). All on deck were just allowing themselves to breathe a sigh of relief when hooves were heard rattling against the wood of the dock.

The next moment, a magnificent, lordly stag was in sight, his dappled flanks heaving from his run.

"I must speak to King Edmund!" he shouted, "This moment!"

"Is that Chervy?" the king enquired. "What news, friend?"

"Enemies at Anvard, Lord king!" the stag exclaimed. "Prince Rabadash is riding with two hundred horsemen to overrun it."

"When did you hear news of this, Chervy?"

"Just this very hour from a boy, my king. He was sent by King Lune himself!"

Without another word, King Edmund went to action. He started ordering men and supplies to be disembarked and made ready for a march at dawn the next morning.

"Has anyone seen her grace, Queen Lucy?" he enquired. "Please ask her to come as soon as she is able. I must have counsel with herself, Queen Susan, Mr Tumnus, Mr Beaver and Lord Peridan without delay."

As though in some carefully choreographed dance, the men started to empty the ship with a will. Karna found herself oftener in the way than out of it and was just trying to stand when she felt a strong arm supporting her weight. Peridan was troubled.

"I am so sorry to ruin this moment, my love," her murmured. "It is not how I envisaged showing you Cair. But our friends need us and we must hasten to their aid."

Karna nodded, though she felt a lump forming in her throat.

"May I carry you straight up to the castle? It will make things much quicker."

She nodded and soon found herself comfortably cradled in his arms. Peridan headed steadily for the gangplank and only paused to ask the queen where she thought would be the best place for Karna.

"You mustn't move out to Timeon's small holding until you are quite recovered, Karna," the queen decreed. "I would suggest taking her to the Great Hall. Mrs Beaver will undoubtedly have a meal prepared and we can decide on the best chamber for her after the council of war has been convened."

So it was that Karna got her first view of Cair Paravel, not walking but being carried in Peridan's arms. She looked about her as they travelled towards the castle. First along the side of the dock, then up a flight of stairs and then into the main castle courtyard.

They had just entered the main square when a young woman came flying down the steps to meet them. Tall and merry-faced, she so resembled her brother and sister that Karna had no trouble in identifying her as Queen Lucy.

"Welcome home Peridan!" she exclaimed, leaning up to give him a light kiss upon the cheek. "I am delighted to see you, despite the dreadful circumstances surrounding your arrival."

"Well met, your highness," Peridan replied with a smile. "May I introduce Miss Karna of Tashbaan? We brought her back with us. She is to live with Master Timeon."

"Welcome to Cair Paravel, Miss Karna. I am Queen Lucy."

"It is an honour to make your acquaintance, your majesty," Karna replied timidly. "I apologise for not being able to curtsey properly."

"Have you been unwell?" the young queen surmised, now alarmed.

"I am afraid so," Peridan replied. "She was dreadfully seasick and developed a raging fever. Thankfully she is over the worst of it now, but lacks strength. Where do you think would be the best place to help her rest, Lucy?"

"I would recommend the Great Hall," she replied. "Mrs Beaver is organising the evening meal for everyone. She was about to ring the gong when the _Splendour Hyaline_ was sighted."

Peridan readily agreed and the young queen led the way into the castle. They passed through a large entrance hall and then moved through a heavy pair of oak doors into a huge hall. Before she knew it, Karna was seated upon a great chair before a roaring fire and having a blanket tucked around her by a female beaver who could only be described as "motherly".

Peridan and Lucy had been quickly dispatched to the council as soon as the kindly creature understood what was happening. She had a brisk, gossipy way of chattering while she worked that Karna instantly liked.

"Can't believe what the world's coming to. Can you, my dear? You've all only just landed after that dreadful voyage and now we're faced with yet another battle. As if there isn't enough going on already with poor High King Peter up in the freezing north routing those terrible giants. He took half the army and General Oreius with him. I do hope that there'll be enough left to take on that terrible Rabadash. By the mane, such a dreadful thing, and in time of peace as well!"

Karna found a cup of hot tea pressed into her hands at this point and took a grateful sip.

"What did you say your name was, my dear?" Mrs Beaver asked after she had finished sorting the crockery for the evening meal.

"Karna, Mrs Beaver."

"And you've travelled all that way from Tashbaan? Dreadfully hot place I've heard and awfully sandy. Never an easy thing to get sand out of your fur, believe me."

"Yes. Master Timeon has been so kind as to invite me to live with him."

The female beaver stopped at that. "Did he now? Well that was kind of him, but I daresay you very much deserve it. He's never been one to make rash decisions, has Master Timeon."

Karna nodded and found herself being presented with a bowl of stew unlike any she had ever seen. It had a rich dark gravy and a strange white root-type vegetable swimming in it.

"Eat up," Mrs Beaver urged, "It'll do you the power of good."

She complied and found the stew very tasty and filling. It warmed her from the inside out. Several bowls were soon dispatched to the council of war and Karna was pleased to see the entrance of Flora.

"Where have you been, young miss?" Mrs Beaver scolded. "Sorting out your mistress' gowns before you've even got a bite of food in you?"

Flora grinned. "I can't deny it," she agreed, "But at least I feel like I've earned it after my work is done."

Soon, she too was seated by Karna and they were enjoying a quiet dinner together. Eventually though, the day's exertions caught up with Karna and she was soon nodding off.

This led to the inevitable discussion about where she would sleep and Mrs Beaver soon settled upon a guest chamber just down the corridor from Queen Susan's. With some help from Flora, Karna was able to climb the grand staircase and eventually found herself in a pleasant, airy chamber with a large window and comfortable furnishings. Flora turned back the covers of the bed with a smile and helped her in.

"I'm just down the corridor if you need me," she assured her and with that, Karna found herself finally there. In Narnia. Safe. At last.

That night, she slept peacefully for the first time in days. It might have been the feeling of safety that came from having finally arrived. But whatever caused it, she was still deeply asleep when a figure stole into her room at first light. Quietly, they seated themselves upon the edge of her bed and simply watched her for a minute before they were forced to act.

A gentle touch upon her cheek eventually roused Karna, though she was still very sleepy when she heard her name being whispered.

"Karna, my love, are you awake?"

She opened her eyes to find Peridan sitting next to her.

"Peridan," she murmured.

He stroked her cheek again before leaning down to kiss her hair.

"Karna, I must go. I have come to say good bye."

Suddenly, she was very awake as yesterday came back to her in a rush.

"Are you going to war?" she asked.

He nodded.

Karna swallowed hard. "What if you don't come back?"

Instantly, she was in his arms. He held her close, stroking her hair.

"I will, my love."

"Promise me, you'll come back."

Without hesitation, he promised. "How could I not come back to you, now that I finally have you safe and with me?"

She looked down, unable to meet his eyes. Gently, Peridan coaxed her face up. "Karna, look at me." She forced herself to.

"I promise you. I will come back to you. If Rabadash is allowed to take Anvard, there will never be peace. We won't ever be truly safe."

Karna took Peridan's face in her hands and nodded. "I know you will come back," she stated. "You would not be the man I loved, if you did not go to war for the protection of the innocent, Peridan. I will wait for you. Just come back safely."

He nodded a final time before kissing her. It started out as a tender touching of lips, but was less careful than their previous and became more passionate as their separation became more real. Eventually, Peridan pulled away and rested his forehead against hers.

"I love you," he stated. "And I will come back."

Karna held his face for a few seconds before replying, "I love you too."

With that, Peridan left for war.

* * *

Author's note:

Gasp! She's updating twice in one WEEK? Yes folks, pigs do fly and I have managed to get this written very speedily! It comes down to one simple word – holidays!

I have drafted out the last few chapters and we will have two more proper chapters and an epilogue.

I wanted this to be a realistic portrayal of what it was like to go to a new land and it couldn't be all smooth sailing. Sea sickness really does suck (or so my dad tells me!) and can lead to other illnesses like fever.

I had to do a lot of re-reading to make the timeline of this accurate and worked out that it took them roughly four days sailing to get back to Cair Paravel. I have made one slight change in that I had them arriving during the evening, not in the morning as Corin states in the book. This simply worked better with the timings I had worked out so I hope I am forgiven for taking this one liberty!

The reviews for the last chapter really touched me when several of you lamented the finishing of this story. I have one or two projects in the works and wanted to know which you would more like to read. One is a Peter/OC romance. Please do not throw fruit and veg at me and say "It's been done to death!" I KNOW it has, but this fic is my attempt to do a Peter romance properly and show myself that I can create a realistic character and decent storyline that explores life in Narnia during the golden age. The other is retelling the story of Lord Bern and how he comes to stay in the Lone Isles rather than travelling on with the other six lords in VODT.

Which would you prefer to read? Feedback would be really appreciated and is very necessary to help me pick one!

Thanks again so much for the wonderful reviews. You guys have made this journey so fulfilling and worthwhile.

Thank you for every review, favourite, follow and reading of every chapter.

Breeze.


	25. Freedom from Fear

Daring to Dream

Chapter 24

Freedom from Fear

The pale light of dawn was just creeping over the eastern horizon as Lord Peridan of Narnia made his way quietly towards the western pasture. It was that time of day when he normally felt most at ease. But then, most days did not hold the prospect of an imminent battle.

On similar occasions in the past he would have been as equally pensive. However, his farewell with Karna was foremost in his mind as he remembered the smell of her hair, the touch of her cheek. When he had previously left for battle, it had been without having someone to come home to. He had always bidden fond farewells to his friends, but there had been something particularly bittersweet about his parting with her.

It was probably the vague possibility of his never returning, but he swept this consideration aside before it was given any time to take root. He had learnt to avoid such thoughts on the eve of battle long ago and was not going to return to such a childish mistake now. It was only the prospect of leaving Karna behind that had awakened such a consideration.

But immediately he realised what a foolish, pessimistic opinion this was. Karna was by no means friendless in Narnia and under the care of Master Timeon. Even if he were to fall, she would have a future and life in Narnia. She was not only under his protection … though maybe he wished her to be?

This gave Peridan pause.

Eventually he thrust this thought aside as well as reality reasserted itself and he forced himself to focus upon the task at hand. This was not the time to consider such life decisions.

With a renewed energy, he strode through the side gate and toward the stable-yard. A few horses nodded over their gates but he had a feeling he would not find his own charger among them. He turned to a dun stallion that was drinking from a nearby trough.

"Good morning, Wheelm," he said.

The stallion raised his head and nodded a greeting. "Good morning, my lord. I assume you are looking for Telden?"

Peridan nodded. "Have you seen him?"

"He was put out in the western pasture by Master Meldor yesterday. I assume he will still be there."

He thanked the talking horse before heading towards the pasture. It had been seven long weeks since he had seen his horse and it seemed a lifetime.

When Telden had first been introduced to him, he had been a three-year old colt that his father had thought his son could learn to break in. As a fourteen-year-old lad with two years of battle-training under his belt, Peridan had been convinced that he would soon have his own charger and had been keen to leave behind the gentle ponies of his boyhood. As so often with these things though, the reality had been very different.

At only three years old, the young stallion had been far more interesting in chasing mares than being ridden and the young Peridan had soon learnt (the hard way) that pride comes before many a fall from a horse! However, after several months and much patience, he had gained Telden's trust and from that had come a thirteen-year partnership. Together, they had crossed the border into Narnia and had since gone through many battles, always working together as a team.

As he rounded a bend in the lane, Peridan came to the gate and saw the shape of several horses grazing far away. He gave a loud, shrill whistle and couldn't help grinning at the reaction of his stallion. Telden immediately looked up, his ears pricked and galloped over to his master with the enthusiasm of a colt.

Peridan laughed and came quickly through the gate, putting his arms around the horse's neck. Telden dropped his head over his master's shoulder and starting lipping affectionately at his hair. For a moment, they simply enjoyed their reunion, before the animal starting sniffing hopefully at Peridan's belt.

The Narnian lord laughed again as he gently pushed the horse's nose away and offered him the carrot he had bought. Telden accepted the offering eagerly, gladly crunching it as Peridan slipped on his bridle and led him out.

He met Lucy approaching with her own bridle and saw her smile. "He missed you," she stated, stroking the bay's neck. "I came to see him every day when you were away and he often had this forlorn look. It was as though he was asking when you would come back."

"It's the longest we've ever been apart," Peridan replied. "I was just marvelling that I've had him thirteen years."

"Well you beat Mist and I by three years," the young queen replied with a smile, referring to her own charger. "But we can still beat you in a race."

Peridan smiled. "We'll have to test that after today."

She sobered instantly. "Yes, we had best prepare."

Within an hour the entire army was assembled and ready to set off. Peridan took his place at the head and proudly lead the way, holding the great banner of Narnia. He spent the majority of the morning leading the column whilst in discussion with a leopard named Anver who paced beside him, remembering previous battles.

They had just paused for a midday repast when Prince Corin came up, dragging a boy who could have been his twin. The resemblance between them was so great that Peridan could not forbear staring. It even turned out that _this_ lad was the one who had met them in Narnia!

"No great wonder," he remarked to Anver as they walked off to water Telden. "I have never seen a greater resemblance. I wonder …"

A memory stirred as he pondered their similarity, but he had little time to consider it before the leopard replied,

"It is indeed striking, my lord. Though I grow concerned by his young highness' lack of judgement. He is very young to witness a battle."

"But there would have been a greater grief if he had been left behind. It is, after all, his home that is under attack."

Anver's concern was soon proven right as the prince's temper led him to fight with and twist a dwarf's ankle. Glad for once that the prince was not his responsibility, Peridan allowed King Edmund to deal with him and was soon deep in discussion with Queen Lucy about the battle.

Their road was a perilous one as they were required to take a single-track over the mountains. A path so narrow that they would at times only be able to travel one at a time.

"But the trees will give us cover once we are over the summit," Peridan replied. "We will be able to spread out in a full formation once we have crossed the pass and can view all of Archenland. That would be a sensible position from which to properly assess the battle."

The plan for the battle were soon in place as the fighters were divided and different possibilities discussed.

"But what if King Lune and his people were unable to reach Anvard in time and it was overrun?" Queen Lucy wondered aloud.

"We can only surmise at this point," her brother replied. "Let us react to what we can see from the open ground that stretches beneath the trees. We will not have long."

They passed over the mountain in almost silence as each rider carefully guided their steed and every talking beast and giant was careful with their footing. Eventually, they emerged from the trees and were able to see all of Archenland spreading before them. It was soon clear (to their relief) that Anvard had not fallen and Rabadash had fifty men using a great trunk as a battering ram against the gate.

King Edmund gave his orders clearly and concisely. Peridan and the other riders took their place at the centre. After saying a silent prayer to Aslan, he tightened Telden's girth and put his helmet on with care. There was always a moment of anticipation before a battle when the adrenalin fills the limbs and gives a heightened awareness of your surroundings. He felt it momentarily as he tightened his grip upon his sword and then, the trumpet sounded.

Afterwards, Peridan almost felt as though he was watching the battle from afar as they plunged down the hill to meet the main Calormene army. There wasn't time to think as he drove Telden into the line of cavalry, striking to both sides with his sword, cleaving through armour and bone.

Without thought, he followed his king, heading straight for the Calormene lords. Several he recognised from their visit. Now heavily armoured and crying for their blood. All about him, swords flashed as men and horses cried out in a mixture of fury and pain. Swiftly, he dispatched a Calormene aiming for his neck and stabbed him in the chest. He had only just removed his sword when he heard a terrified whinnying and knew that the cats had killed the spare horses.

He saw that King Edmund had reached the Calormene lords and urged Telden forward to support him. The charger responded to his master's will and galloped off, bringing his hooves down upon the skull of one Calormen foot soldier. In the corner of his eye, Peridan saw a flash of red and ducked as an axe came soaring past his head. To his right, he saw a Calormene lord with a crimson beard bearing down upon him, sword raised.

Peridan turned Telden quickly and raced to meet the Calormene whose name escaped him. Their fight was swift and deadly as they fought, trying to find each other's weaknesses.

"Fight me properly, barbarian!" the Tarkhaan spat, jumping from his horse. Peridan acted immediately and dismounted in one swift move, fighting hand to hand with his enemy. The clang of steel rang in his ears as they sparred. The Calormene attacked with all his might, forcing him back. Peridan took a step when a thought struck him. He allowed one particularly fierce volley to knock his shield sideways, giving the Tarkhaan a false sense of winning. On purpose, he stumbled to the side, as though clutching an injury. The triumph of victory made the Calormene lord careless.

"Die, barbarian scum!" he yelled, raising his sword to give the killing blow, before staring down at the dagger which was now protruding from his chest. Without pausing, Peridan stabbed him through the heart with his sword and quickly pulled both weapons from his enemy. He turned in time to see King Lune strike down Azrooh. The Calormene army were severely depleted as many had turned tail and sprinted for the woods.

After striking down one Calormene he caught a glimpse of bay flank and whistled loudly. With relief, he saw Telden leap over a dead Calormene and canter towards him. He had just mounted and turned to help his king when he realised that the majority of the fighting had ceased and only King Edmund and Chlamash were still in combat. The next moment, the Tarkhaan had surrendered and the battle was ended.

Peridan gave himself a moment to breathe in relief and pat Telden's heaving neck. He dismounted and hugged his stead before heading over to the castle where King Edmund and King Lune were shaking hands over the battering ram. He was about to greet the king when he became aware of the ridiculous spectacle of Rabadash hanging from the wall like a piece of washing!

Unable to help himself, he burst out laughing with the rest and observed the prince's humiliation as he as bound and led in by several Archenlanders. Then, the most extraordinary thing happened as Prince Corin was made to stand by the boy Shasta and they realised the boy's true identity as none but the lost Prince Cor!

Amazed at the number of incredible occurrences happening that day, Peridan was just turning to deal with Telden when he felt the thump of a hand on his shoulder.

"Well met indeed, Peridan. It has been many years, my friend." He turned to see Lord Darrin smiling upon him, his brother not far behind him.

"Well met, Dar, Darrin," he replied. "It is good to see you both. You are right, it has been many years."

"Too many, my friend. It is good to see that you still have the same skill you showed with the sword as a boy."

Peridan thanked them before following to greet many old friends from his boyhood. It was particularly gratifying to greet Cole and Colin, with whom he had trained.

"Is Per here?" he asked, glancing around for his brother.

At the mention of his name, Col's face fell slightly. Colin's was a mask.

"He chose to protect the people, Peridan," Col stated.

Peridan didn't speak for a moment as this sunk in. "He stayed on the estate?"

"There was very little warning, Peridan."

"Was he among the hunt that met Prince Col?"

The brothers shared a look and Peridan asked no more. He knew the truth of his brother's character but had never wished to speak of it openly, as his friends now did the same. Even when they were growing up, Per had always been more farmer than warrior, preferring to learn about crop rotation rather than combat. But in time of war, every man had to fulfil his duty …

"Come Peridan." Cole interrupted his thoughts. "Let someone else care for Telden and greet the king."

With a final glance, Peridan allowed himself to be led away from the battlefield and any other unpleasant recollections.

* * *

After a few minutes of tossing, it was soon clear to Karna that she would not be getting back to sleep. Her head was too full.

Slowly, she rose from her bed and moved towards the window. It looked out upon the vast Eastern Ocean and reminded her of their voyage over the past three days.

Unable to remain quietly in her room, Karna dressed quickly and peered out into the deserted passage. It was still very early so it was dark, the wall torches unlit. Cautiously, she made her way along it and paused at the top of a staircase. It was also dim, so she took her time to descend, clutching a wall. Eventually she reached the bottom and found herself in a larger corridor that she thought was on the ground floor. She was just turning to the right when she heard a husky voice.

"Miss Karna?" Glancing up, she saw the panther Dell padding towards her. "Are you lost?"

Karna coloured and admitted that she was. "Lord Peridan came to say good bye and I couldn't get back to sleep so I thought I would get up and …"

"Watch the army depart?"

She nodded. "But I can't find my way."

The panther also nodded. "I understand. I am on my way to join Queen Susan in the courtyard if you would like to accompany me?"

Karna smiled gratefully.

"I sometimes forget that humans cannot see in the dark," the panther commented. "I am used to humans who know Cair like the back of their hand."

"It seems such a large place."

"Do not worry, you will soon grow accustomed to it. Cair is a wonderful place to live."

Karna nodded. "I am starting to see that. All the creatures I have met so far have been so kind."

"It is a very different society to Calormen, Miss Karna," Dell replied. "Everyone does their bit to help in Narnia. We do have kings and queens and lords and ladies, but they help with the running of the castle as much as any servant."

"They do?"

"Oh yes. Her majesty, Queen Susan is a keen gardener and often assists the moles in its cultivation. Queen Lucy is a keen archer and frequently aids with the fletching of arrows and cleaning of armour. Even High King Peter has been known to take a trip to the farm to sometimes relieve stress."

Karna had had a hint of this non-hierarchical way of living in Tashbaan but seeing it acted out was something different altogether. Soon, Dell and she were walking towards the stable-yard.

A small crowd were standing beneath an archway, watching the army depart. Queen Susan, Flora and Mrs Beaver were among them.

Karna followed Dell to a point where she could see the column but then held back, suddenly feeling shy. There were many faces that were new to her and she found her confidence suddenly gone. Thankfully the crowd were waving farewell and did not notice her reluctance.

Protected from view, Karna watched Peridan's back as he departed, looking so strong and brave upon his charger. He rode confidently with the Narnian banner held in his hand, proud and noble. A true knight.

For the first time, Karna was struck by a sense of inadequacy.

Peridan was a _lord_. He was of _noble birth_. Educated. Brave. Accomplished. Highly born. And what was she? A bastard. A peasant. Outspoken. Head strong. Stubborn. A servant girl.

Suddenly, the impossibility of her situation hit her. _Why had she come here? Why had she chosen to come to this alien land, instead of accepting a safe home with her godmother? Why had she thrown her future into the hands of a man she barely knew?_

Karna slowly allowed the doubts to creep in as her fears overcame her. Looking again, she took in the strange, frightening scene. A queen, regal and beautifully gowned was standing on a dusty step, her hand holding that of a talking beaver. Her maid, who should have had downcast eyes and been five steps behind her, was actually standing next to her, her hand resting comfortingly upon the queen's shoulder. It was all _wrong!_

Unable to suppress her worries any longer, Karna turned and ran from the strange scene. She moved as silently as she could and headed to the only thing she recognised. The sea. It was the ocean that had brought her to this strange land, maybe she could take it back?

Carefully, she crept through the castle, wanting to reach the beach rather than the harbour. Eventually, she discovered a gate that led directly to the golden shore.

It was only once she was kneeling, watching the gentle to and fro of the waves, that Karna realised her folly. She could _never_ go back. She had made a choice and now she must stick to it. Even if it terrified and frightened her beyond belief when faced with the truth of her decision.

But it was just so … different.

Not exactly knowing why, Karna felt tears stinging her eyes. Bewildered, she simply let them fall.

She didn't know how long she sat there. But it was a long time before she realised she wasn't alone.

Gradually, she became aware of another sound beside the lapping of the waves. It was a deep, low rumble. So quiet that it was barely audible above the splashing repetition. Eventually, she did hear it.

A quick glance was enough to make her heart leap into her mouth and her blood freeze. The rumbling was coming from the chest of a creature she had only seen in her dreams.

He was beautiful, but terrifying.

The lion sat, about five metres away from her. He was huge. His shaggy fur was a yellow brown. His claws long and deadly. But it was his eyes that held her. Golden and ageless.

"Child," he asked, "why are you crying?" His voice was deep and yet soft, holding the resonance of the purr that still rumbled in his chest.

Karna stared at him. Unsure whether she was still in a dream.

The lion turned to her fully now and repeated his question. "Child, why are you crying?"

Unbidden, more tears stained Karna's face. "I don't belong, sir," she choked out, her voice barely a whisper.

"You don't belong where, child?"

"I don't belong anywhere."

"Why do you say that?"

"I don't understand this land. It's … so different. I'll never understand …"

"Why do you think this?"

"I … I don't know … I just felt so alone …"

"Karna." Her name was a caress in his voice. It was the first time he had ever said it. "My daughter, you are not alone."

She stared at him, spellbound.

"You have never been alone. I have always been with you, through every joy and every sorrow." His eyes were suddenly very sad.

Karna felt the tears returning. "You were there when … when Mother …"

She started to sob and buried her face in her hands.

A soft, warm breath touched her face and she slowly felt calm enough to raise her face. His gentle tongue licked away her tears, comforting and giving her strength.

The lion was very close now, his expression anguished. "I was there, dear one," he stated. "I was there when she married your father. I was there when you were born. I was there when he died. I was there when she sacrificed her life to save yours. I was there to heal your wounds when your stepfather beat you. And I told you in the garden that on the path to joy you would face a great and terrible sorrow."

"Mother."

The lion nodded his great head. "You will see her again."

Karna felt her heart lurch. "I will?"

"In my new country. But it will not be for a long time, my daughter."

She nodded, calmer now. "Sir, might I ask you a question?"

"Ask anything you wish, child."

"Are you Aslan?"

"I am."

"Why did I see you in Tashbaan?"

"So you would come to know me, as you will."

"You knew I would come here?"

"I did and I can sense the fear that you have allowed to enter your heart. Karna, let go it. Fear robs us of our peace. You have no reason to be afraid."

"But everything is so different …"

"Only for now. Take time and trust in the kind souls you will find here. You belong in Narnia, my daughter. You always will."

"With Peridan?"

"With all my children. Trust me. Let go of your fear and heed my words. You are home."

In that instant, Karna allowed herself to believe. She looked into the wise, depthless eyes of the lion and trusted him. She saw her fear for what it was – left over pain about her stepfather and uncertainty about herself. Aslan's words washed through her, taking it away.

She. Was. Home.

"Thank you, dear Aslan," she whispered. His eyes softened and without thinking, she threw her arms about his shaggy neck and hugged him. His fur was warm and smelt of something she couldn't recognise. But beneath it, she felt his strength and great power.

This lion was compassionate, yes. However, there was also a power that reassured and slightly awed her.

She pulled back and stared once more into those depthless eyes. Very gently, Aslan touched his tongue to her forehead. "Be at peace, dear one," he stated. "We shall meet again."

With that, he turned and bounded away.

* * *

Author's note: This is a chapter of two sides – Peridan and Karna.

I wanted to explain the detail about Peridan's horse. Firstly, if you've read my profile you might have noticed that I love horse riding and I am a bit obsessed. If you read _The Idealist_ (another fic of mine) you will have a closer explanation of the relationship a person can have with a horse. I chose not to have Peridan or any of the Pevensies riding a talking horse because C.S. Lewis states that talking horses only do their duty "in time of war" and in my head that meant that it wouldn't be considered proper for humans to ride them in everyday life (regardless of Edmund riding Philip in the film of LLW). So in my head a dumb horse made more sense because they could ride them every day and develop a life-long bond as Peridan has with Telden. Also, in medieval times, knights rode unsnipped (unneutered) horses called destriers that were as much a weapon as their swords because they would get something called bloodlust in battle and help their rider attack the enemy. So this is why I took so long talking about that back story.

I hope you liked the battle from his perspective – I have done a lot of re-reading to keep the events canon-accurate. Even the timings of the day! Anradin in the only Tarkhaan's whose killer isn't mentioned so I thought I'd let Peridan have the credit! Also a little family drama with his brother was mentioned because that MIGHT make an interesting character piece a little later if I want to come back and do a one-shot companion piece … we'll see …

I know Karna got a little angsty but the poor girl has been through an awful lot and she needed Aslan's reassurance to put everything back into perspective for her! I mean it has only been about a week since her mum died! I hope the second half made sense but I was partly inspired by the concept of a culture shock that many face when moving to a new country, Narnia is VERY different to Calormen.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this. We are looking at one more chapter and then the epilogue. The aim is to complete by 1st September, we will see! Also many thanks to Mel, Marianne 16 and Kilgarrah for voting, though the next project is now at:

Peter/OC – 2

Bern – 2

Sorry for the long author's note but I am getting pretty sad that this journey will soon end. This was published a year ago on 31st July and I am two chapters away from the end!

Anyway, hope you enjoyed this chappie, please let me know what you think!

Thanks,

Breeze.


	26. Getting There in the End

Daring to Dream

Chapter Twenty Five

Getting there in the End

Dedicated to TastyasitGets and Penny Caird who believed that much in Karna's journey.

* * *

Mrs Beaver was having a very busy morning. She had had to scold far more people than usual and kept being distracted from the duties that she had been expressly told not to fulfil. Well, at least, the High King has expressly ordered that no fuss should be made – but then when did anyone ever listen to Peter when he was being what his youngest sister referred to as "too altruistic for his own good"?

It had all started with the return of Swiftmane.

He was the youngest of Oreius' sons and was proving to be a reliable messenger (though he was still considered too young to actually fight in the wars). The centaur had brought word of the High King's triumphant defeat of the giants and expected return in approximately a week. Swiftmane had also shared that King Peter had expressly forbidden any special feast of celebration to be held at their return.

It was a well-known fact among his subjects that the High King hated a fuss being made. However, when one had known said king since he was a boy, Mrs Beaver thought that one had the right to countermand such decrees.

So she did.

With alacrity!

The preparations had begun the very day of Swiftmane's return as men and beasts had been sent out to acquire the necessary provisions. The whole court was in a whirl of fishing, hunting and gathering.

Mrs Beaver would have been satisfied with the pace of preparation had it not been for the frequent interruptions that kept affecting her schedule. That very morning she had already had to shoo several of the sheep dog puppies out of her kitchen and away from the fresh meat pies, wasted at least an hour convincing the Lords Peridan and Marken that the High King really _would_ be delighted with the surprise and had almost had to bully the moles into providing the vegetables for the stew, despite what the Foremole had stated about "unnecessary depletion of their winter surplus stores".

With an irritated twitch of her whiskers, the female beaver set about working the pastry with slightly more energy than was probably needed, muttering under her breath.

However, one good thing that had come from the recent battles was undoubtedly the arrival of the sweet Miss Karna to their ranks.

From the moment of their first meeting, Mrs Beaver had warmed to the quiet, gentle Calormene girl. She had proven polite, attentive and very keen to help about Cair Paraval in any way that she could. It had only taken a day for her culinary skills to be recognised and she had since become an almost permanent feature in the kitchen of the castle. Mrs Beaver was particularly impressed by her dedication to her work.

However, there was also a reserve about Karna that she did not think was natural. The girl walked around the castle as quietly as a mouse, seeming constantly in awe of everything around her. She supposed it was only to be expected, given her upbringing as a servant girl in Tashbaan. But there was seldom any burst of feeling from her, except when she was with certain people that she trusted. She observed her now, carefully forming the loaves for the evening meal, and wished that she knew how to bring about more than a polite smile.

Flora was also present, and Karna did seem comfortable with her …

"How do you find, Cair Paravel, Miss Karna? You have now been here two weeks," the beaver asked, smiling at her.

Karna looked up and returned the smile politely. "It's so very different and wonderful, Mrs Beaver," she replied.

"It's certainly _different_!" Flora agreed with a giggle. "I don't think you ever find a moment's peace, what with everyone running about."

"It is busy, but it's a good busy," Karna offered.

"How so?" Mrs Beaver queried.

"In Tashbaan, it was always busy, but people went about with an air of mystery that was considered fashionable. There's none of that here. To quote a Calormene proverb, people call a spoon, a spoon. There's no mystery, they just say what they mean and laugh if they are amused. It's a wonderful busyness."

"Do you miss Tashbaan at all?" Flora asked.

"Only my family. I'll never miss the work or future I would have had."

"So you're happy?" the maid pressed.

Karna blinked, slightly confused at Flora's pushing. "Yes, very."

"Then why are you always so _careful_?" the other girl asked, almost as though she had been reading Mrs Beaver's mind.

"What do you mean, careful?"

"We mean, almost nervous around us, my dear," the beaver confided. "I was wondering the same thing myself, before young miss here bludgeoned her way in." She shot a hard look at Flora, who shrugged, unapologetic. "Do you fear us?"

The girl coloured and shook her head. "No, dear Mrs Beaver, I could never fear you. I was just afraid of doing something wrong."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know how to act around talking beasts and other creatures who live here. I've met so many these past few weeks! Dwarves, fauns, satyrs, centaurs, naiads, dryads, giants … I've been afraid I might misspeak and offend someone. All my life in Calormen it was frowned upon to speak your mind and I was silenced almost every time I spoke. It is so very different here and I didn't want to upset anyone …"

She petered off in embarrassment and turned her face to hide it. Touched by her confusion, Mrs Beaver left her pastry and walked over, placing a paw on Karna's arm.

"Karna?" The young woman glanced down. "Just listen to me and heed my words. You have been nothing but polite and helpful since your arrival and you could not be more welcome. Narnia is now your home and we want you to be yourself. Don't ever be afraid to laugh or speak your mind. Aslan said you were home, did he not?"

Karna nodded.

"Then do as the High King over all Kings has said and be at home. Speak your mind. Laugh. Be happy. We want to see the real you."

Deeply touched, Karna hugged Mrs Beaver and received a kindly pat upon her back.

"There you go," finished the kindly creature. "Now you return to those loaves before they burn or good dough will have been wasted."

After sharing an amused glance with Flora, Karna returned to her baking, her heart feeling strangely lighter.

* * *

One of the first differences that had struck Karna about Narnia was the way she woke every morning.

In Tashbaan, she had been surrounded by the breathing of her family and normally awoke to Tarneesh's kick, or some sound from the street such as a bark or shout. In Narnia her slumber was interrupted by the chorus of morning birdsong or the noise of the cows in the yard. She would wake in her own chamber with only the sounds of Timeon knocking around in the main room.

There would be a flurry of activity in the morning but it involved them working together, rather than bumping into each other.

After two weeks of Timeon explaining how life worked in the small holding, they had fallen into a comfortable routine of morning chores. He would always draw the water and bring in the wood, while Karna made the tea and baked their morning loaf. She was a skilled enough cook and had taken great pleasure in cleaning their home from top to bottom when she first moved in.

But there had proven to be other skills that she had little knowledge of, such as how to care for lifestock or tend a garden. Some chores, such as caring for the chickens and goats now came naturally. But other tasks, such as how to milk their two cows, still eluded Karna. She was able to get a steady spray of milk from the younger cow, Aster, but still lacked the ease with which Timeon would carelessly milk her mother. It had become something of a standing joke that he could milk Gracie (the older cow) and muck out the goats in the time it took Karna to simply finish milking.

The start of the day was always spent in the quiet little home before they both walked up to Cair Paravel to fulfil their daily duties. Timeon was always in the infirmary or collecting herbs. Whereas Karna's time was often split between many occupations. Whether that was in helping to clean the castle, or swapping cooking tips with Mrs Beaver in the kitchen. She enjoyed a daily riding lesson under Peridan's patient tutelage, as well as learning how to care for the beasts.

The residents of her new country had also proven very welcoming and accepted her as one of their own. Something all the more reassuring since her conversation with Mrs beaver.

She had spent many a happy hour sewing with Queen Susan and the other few ladies of court after lunch, all of whom were young and merry. Flora had become a good friend and would often spend time showing Karna the castle and explaining how things ran.

But Karna's closest companion besides Timeon and Peridan was undoubtedly Queen Lucy. From their victorious return to Cair after the siege of Anvard, the valiant queen had taken time to not only befriend, but also get to know Karna personally. They had spent long hours together walking and discussing her life in Tashbaan, as well as Queen Lucy's memories of her old life. They possessed a similar imagination and would share endless stories from their childhoods. Karna had even told the young queen of her meeting with Aslan and listened in wonder as Lucy related her own interactions with the lion.

"Do you see him very often?" Karna had asked.

"Not regularly, but he comes when he is needed," Lucy replied. She had been teaching Karna archery and it was proving to be another skill that she found hard.

"You just need to practise," the young queen comforted as Karna missed the target for a sixth time.

Her companion sighed. "Along with so many other things."

"How is your milking?" Lucy enquired with an impish grin.

Karna laughed. "Still slow, but Aster is patient and I am making progress! Have you ever milked a cow, your highness?"

The blond queen pulled a face. "Once or twice. But I am much better with horses."

"I envy you your relationship with Mist. I hope that I can one day have such a way with the beasts."

"You have to remember Karna; I've been riding since I was eight. Mist and I have been together for ten years."

"And Peridan broke Telden in when he was fourteen. I had no idea that humans could have such a bond with animals."

"I suppose you had no need for them in Tashbaan?"

Karna shook her head. "We went to the market for our food and my stepfather always carried his carvings in a bundle. Only farmers and stall holders had need of a horse or mule to pull their cart."

"What of hens' eggs or goats for milk?"

"We never drunk milk, it would sour quickly in the heat and we rarely ate eggs. Narnia has a very different climate to Calormen."

Lucy nodded. "That's true. I would miss the greenery of Narnia. I could never live near a desert."

"The desert does have a beauty of its own, but it is so vastly different to Narnia's deep forests and rolling hills. I do love the trees."

The younger queen smiled. "So do I. Have you danced with the dryads yet?"

Karna shook her head.

Lucy grinned. "Come with me tonight. There is a particular grove of birch trees whose dryads always dance at the full moon, it's glorious. Now, mind back on why we are here. Show me your stance and remember to take your time."

Karna avoided an eye-roll at the change in focus. After taking in a breath, she took up her stance and raised the bow carefully. It was rather hard to focus when her mind was upon dancing fauns …

"Try to relax your shoulders slightly," Lucy instructed. She did. "Lower your right arm. That's it. Now breathe out and release as you do."

Karna slowly let out her breath, felt the arrow release and was rewarded with it sinking into the bottom right corner of the circle.

"I did it!" she exclaimed.

Lucy grinned. "It's all in the preparation," she replied. "Speaking of which … aren't you due at the kitchens very shortly?"

Her companion flinched and stared at the sky in dismay. "Blast! I was meant to be there at high sun, I promised to help with the vegetable preparation for dinner."

Lucy nodded and quickly jogged to retrieve the arrows. They were just walking past the vegetable garden when they heard a cry from above. A large raven landed near them, his plumage glossy in the bright sunlight.

"Good morning, your majesty, my lady," he greeted them, bobbing a quick bow.

"Good morning, Master Sallowpad," Lucy replied, returning the gesture. "Would you care to accompany us back to the castle?"

The raven nodded. "I should be delighted, but I did wish to have a moment's discussion with Lady Karna, if I might?"

The merry queen smiled. "Of course. I will return our bows to the armoury. I shall see you later, Karna."

Karna smiled as her friend left, marvelling at the sunniness of Lucy's outlook. It seemed that nothing could affect her cheerfulness.

Once the queen had departed, she smiled at the raven.

"I hope Velvetplume was well this morning, Master Sallowpad?"

"She was very well I thank you, Miss Karna," he replied. "I suppose you know why I wished to speak to you?"

The young woman's face sobered and she nodded. "About Peridan?"

"Indeed."

"Before you do, I have wished to say something for a long time. Peridan has told me of the role you played in helping him to realise what he felt for me and … I cannot thank you enough, Master Sallowpad. If it had not been for you I might have chosen so differently …" She paused as the pictured the other decision and could not repress at delicate shudder.

"I require no thanks, Miss Karna. Peridan is one of my oldest friends and I simply helped him to realise the truth of what he felt. The reality is that he had never experienced such feelings before and could not identify them. Even when it was obvious to all those about him."

Karna managed to laugh at this. "He was that oblivious?"

The raven cackled. "I believe I compared his judgement to that of a child in this particular matter."

That elicited a giggle and she actually found herself smiling. Eventually they both sobered and Sallowpad continued. "All joking aside, my lady. I wanted to reassure you that Peridan does feel very deeply for you, although he may not be very good at showing it."

More temperate now, she nodded. "I had thought that once we were in Narnia …" She paused as she tried to find the right words. "Might I be blunt, master raven?"

"I wish you would, Miss Karna,"

"He was so … so earnest and gentle when he left for the battle. He told me that he loved me and even kissed me." She blushed slightly at the memory. "I had thought that all was now sorted between us but since their return from the battle …"

"He has pulled back?"

She nodded. "He is courteous and kind. But, more as he used to be before my life was threatened. It is as though …"

"As though he does not care for you as strongly as you thought in Tashbaan?"

Karna sighed. "I was anxious that now he is back in his homeland, he might be feeling as though he has made a mistake …"

"He doesn't," Sallowpad was quick to reassure her. "Please believe me, Miss Karna. Peridan still loves you as much as ever. He is just struggling with how to express his feelings in the court and … I think that he wishes to give you the opportunity to experience your new life without the pressure of expectation."

"The expectation of what?"

"To express feelings that, in his opinion, might possibly have been expressed through a sense of gratitude."

Karna flushed, suddenly angry. "He _doubts me?_ He actually doubts that I love him?"

"No, not doubts!" the raven assured her. "But he wants to give you time to adjust to life in Narnia. To find your place and feel at home, to be sure of how you truly feel before he acts upon his feelings again."

Amazed at how deluded one man could be, she shook her head. "Why has he not spoken to _me_ about this? I could have spared him (and myself) two weeks of distance."

Sallowpad actually smiled slightly. "I am afraid Peridan is still a complete novice when it concerns matters of the heart."

"Aren't we all?" Karna muttered. Forcing herself to calm down, she turned to the raven with a smile. "Thank you for your words, Master Sallowpad. You have reassured me greatly. I now see that it is I who must act. If we waited for Peridan we might still be here in five winters."

The raven cackled and bowed to the young woman. "I believe you might be right, my lady."

With a smile Karna left, now dreadfully late for her shift.

* * *

It was the sighting of the huts that first made the High King's heart leap. They were on the fifth day of their march homeward and he had been growing daily wearier of the passing stones and grey, barren grasslands. But with the first sighting of a marsh-wiggle's hut came the certainty that they had finally left Ettinsmoor and the giants far behind.

Unable to withhold a grin, he cantered his horse forward so that he was level with Oreius (who bore the standard at the front of the column).

"One day's ride until we are home, my friend," he stated with satisfaction.

The centaur nodded. "It will be good to see Cair Paravel once more," he agreed.

"I look forward to hearing about the siege of Anvard," Peter replied. "I am very curious about what Rabadash's fate was. The scoundrel's actions deserved death, but I doubt King Lune would have taken such extreme measures."

"I believe he will have released the prince under strict conditions. Though I would not trust him to keep them, sire."

The High King nodded. "We must keep even more regular contact with Archenland to ensure their desert border is quiet. I fear the prince will not take Queen Susan's refusal with a good grace." Oreius heartily agreed and they discussed plans of defence extensively for the rest of the day.

By sunset they had just reached the banks of the River Shribble and all considered it a good enough place to camp. Both Peter and Oreius agreed that the army deserved a rest after the exertions of an extensive campaign.

Their location also offered the luxuries of running water for a wash and plentiful fish for the evening meal. So, when they did lie down to rest that night it was to the comforting feeling of full bellies and a proper wash for the first time in weeks.

It was only after an early rise the following morning that the High King started to question the likelihood that all of his orders had been obeyed. He had a horrible feeling that they might have prepared a celebration for their return. Oreius did little to assuage his concern upon the matter.

"I would think it likely, sire," he added. "They need little excuse to plan a celebration."

"But would they go expressly against my orders?" Peter pressed.

The centaur shrugged. "I am no more certain than you, your highness. We can only see what awaits us upon our return."

The High King had to be satisfied with this. He tried to let the passing countryside distract him, but he could not avoid a nagging feeling at the back of his mind that they would face a celebration on their return.

They made excellent time and were soon entering the woodland to the north of Cair Paravel. Soon, many talking beasts were coming out to bow and greet their High King, delaying their return somewhat. But Peter was very glad to see them and spoke to each creature politely.

Eventually, they passed through the last of the trees and were greeted by the clear blowing of a horn. Peter sighed as he took in the assembly of the entire population of Cair Paravel awaiting them on the slope at the front of the castle.

"So much for low-key," he muttered. He earned a single smile from Oreius before leading the way towards the group.

Once at the main group he dismounted to greet his siblings with a sardonic smile.

"It's nice to see that _every_ command was obeyed," he commented drily.

Edmund smirked. Susan laughed. Lucy sprang forward to hug him.

"It was Mrs Beaver's doing!" she exclaimed with a chuckle. "But you _are_ too altruistic for your own good Peter."

"She does have a point," Susan agreed as she stepped forward to hug her brother. "Welcome home Peter, we have missed you."

Peter gave a real smile as he hugged his sisters. "I suppose I shall have to forgive the force of nature that is Mrs Beaver," he agreed, grinning at the kindly beaver who beamed up at him.

"Well what else would you expect, sire?" she chided. "You've achieved a great victory and you don't even want us to celebrate it?"

"She is right, Pete," his brother agreed. "You do need to occasionally take some credit, especially after routing an entire population of giants."

"You're one to talk!" the High King replied, "Defeated any Calormene armies recently?"

Edmund merely grinned and the brothers shared a warriors' embrace of clasping arms and thumping each other on the back. The greetings continued and though he would never admit it to anyone, Peter very much enjoyed being welcomed home by his friends and family.

Eventually though, Mrs Beaver would not allow any more hellos and shooed himself and the entire army off to bathe and have a small meal.

"There's a feast tonight," Lucy confided, "And I believe dancing was mentioned."

Peter smothered a groan. Susan grinned in response, "At least there are no visiting princesses you'll be required to dance with. You can remain seated for the whole night if you wish to."

He perked up at this and moved away with more of a bounce to his step.

Lucy turned to Karna with a smile,

"He never will, he likes dancing too much! He just enjoys making a public reaction."

Karna returned the smile and watched the departing king with interest. He was still a young man. No more than seven and twenty. Tall, broad-shouldered and strongly built. He had a regal bearing and yet there was something almost boyish about him when he interacted with his siblings. She looked forward to being introduced and getting to know him better.

"Well, that was High King Peter."

She turned to smile at Peridan.

"Indeed and apparently very displeased with the prospect of dancing."

He laughed and she was pleased to see his grey eyes warmer than they had been in weeks.

"It is only his way. We would be concerned if he did not react in such a way."

"Why?"

"The High King is very popular with visiting ladies of noble birth. He seldom manages to escape from their clutches because he is far too polite and charming."

Karna laughed. "Well I hope he feels amenable to dancing tonight. I am sure he will enjoy it."

"Oh? Are you hoping to be honoured with his hand?"

She paused before answering. There was subtext to Peridan's question that she could not disregard. Remembering her earlier resolution, Karna dared to be more forward that she normally would.

"I would be honoured if he asked me, but there is another lord whose hand I am more keen to accept for the first dance."

"Who?"

Peridan's expression was openly curious but also a little guarded, almost as though he were … jealous?

"Who do you think, Peridan? You, of course!"

He blinked. "Oh. I see."

Karna sighed. "I hope so, because I would very much like to dance with you tonight. If you will _ask_ me."

Peridan's embarrassment was palpable. He clenched his hands so hard that his knuckles turned white.

"I'm sorry Karna," he stated with chagrin. "I never meant to hurt you …"

"Why have you been so distant?" she pressed, more relieved that they were now finally talking.

"I wanted to give you a chance to settle in …"

"Did you imagine that your distance made it _easier_?"

He frowned. "I suppose not. I am very sorry."

"I accept your apology, now may we please move on?"

"I would very much like to."

"So, you still love me?"

Peridan looked horrified. "How can you even ask that? Of course I do!"

"Then will you show it? I have been feeling horribly isolated from you. I am very fond of Timeon and Flora and Lucy have become very dear friends, but the person I most wanted to speak to was treating me as though I was a distant cousin rather than the woman he loves."

"Karna, please forgive me." Peridan took her very gently in his arms, cradling her to him. "And may I make amends by asking you for the first dance tonight?"

Karna smiled then, relief making her almost giddy. "Of course you may, my lord."

Peridan returned the smile with a real one of his own. "I've been a fool."

"Well now it is water under the bridge. Shall we agree to never speak of it again?"

"You are very understanding, my love."

"I try to be. But now I must depart to get ready for tonight. Lucy informed me that I was expected in her chamber without delay."

"Do you know why?"

"I believe she wishes to lend me a dress."

"Then I will let you go. Heaven forbid that I get in the way of beauty's call."

Laughing, Karna started to pull away. But not before Peridan caught her hand and placed a kiss upon the palm.

"I shall see you later," she promised, before fleeing.

Peridan watched her go, marvelling that he could have been such a fool for so long. Sallowpad had indeed been right, he was a complete child when it came to matters of the heart!

* * *

It began as the sun was setting. Delicious smells had been emanating from the kitchens all day, but Mrs Beaver would not allow the diners to enter until the long table was set exactly to her satisfaction. So they were all mingling in the entrance hall and the throne room as they waited to be allowed entry.

Peridan had changed into one of his finer tunics and was talking quietly with Peter, Edmund and a group of knights that included Mister Tumnus and Marken. They had related the main events of the siege of Anvard and were just discussing the likelihood of any further action from Rabadash, when they heard a voice calling from the grand staircase.

"Lords, ladies, friends and fellow Narnians. May I introduce the ladies of Cair Paravel?" Dell was acting as voice piece and did not seem to mind the duty.

The ladies of the court descended in a group, all smiling and laughing. They were dressed in their finest and looking very lovely. Susan was striking as always in a gown of lobelia and Lucy looked very pretty in a red and golden dress.

But there was one lady in particular that Peridan could not look away from.

The only time he had seen Karna finely dressed, it had been during the dance at Master Tirshan's house. Then, she had been dressed alluringly in the golden outfit. Tonight, she easily surpassed her beauty upon that night. It was in the way she carried herself. Now, there was no fear, no distance in her smile. She was completely at ease as she descended the staircase amongst her friends.

She wore a gown of pale green silk, with embroidery of a darker green around the neckline, sleeves and bodice. The colour made her skin appear golden and perfectly set off her exotic beauty. Her long dark hair was mostly loose, but partly braided away from her face. Small white flowers decorated the braids and a delicate silver chain graced her throat.

Peridan swallowed hard. She was beautiful … and she had chosen _him_.

He could not take his eyes off her and it was not missed by those standing near. Edmund nudged Peter and Peridan was even oblivious to their shared smirks.

"Peridan?"

He turned to the High King.

"Would you introduce me to Miss Karna now? I haven't yet had the pleasure."

"Of course, sire."

Hastily, Peridan gathered his senses and led Peter over.

"Miss Karna, may I introduce High King Peter of Narnia?"

Karna curtseyed deeply as the king bowed.

"I am honoured to meet you, your majesty."

"Nay, the honour is mine, Miss Karna," the High King replied, bowing over her hand and kissing it gallantly. "I have heard much of your bravery and courage. Might I also add; you look very beautiful tonight."

Karna blushed deeply and thanked him. The conversation that followed was easy and comfortable as the King asked after her family and life in Calormen. Karna found him very charming and easy to talk to. She could see why so many young noblewomen fell in love with him on such a regular basis!

Eventually the gong sounded and Mrs Beaver allowed them to finally enter the dining hall. King Peter bowed and absented himself to lead Susan into dinner. Not wanting to miss his chance, Peridan quickly offered her his arm. Karna took it happily.

"I am disappointed that Peter beat me to the punch," he confided.

Karna stared at him, not understanding.

"He got in ahead of me," he explained.

"How so?"

"I wished to tell you how beautiful you look this evening and he said it before I could."

She laughed, feeling her blush returning. "It is simply the dress, Queen Susan very kindly leant it to me …"

"Nay, Karna, it is not just the dress. _You_ are beautiful tonight. I have not said this before; I probably should have much sooner … you are always lovely to me. But to see you coming down that staircase, smiling and utterly at ease among the other ladies of the court … I have never seen you more beautiful. I cannot believe that you love me …"

Unable to speak at such words, Karna managed a squeeze of his hand and allowed her eyes to speak for her. Peridan himself felt overcome and kissed her hand before leading her into the hall for the meal.

The whole evening was one of uncommon delight to all who were there. The food was excellent, the wine plentiful and delicious. The company better.

Once the tables had been cleared, a small band started up and soon they were all dancing. Karna started off following Peridan carefully and allowing him to lead her, but she soon realised that the basic steps were similar for every dance. After the end of her third she was having a wonderful time, laughing and swinging arms with many partners. She danced with everyone – Peridan, Marken, Tumnus, Edmund, Peter, Felsted and even Timeon got in on the act, whirling her around in a lively number. She skipped with the fauns and kicked with the dwarves. It was a time of unbridled delight for all who took part.

Then came the storytelling and great tales were told. Of distant battles and adventures in Calormen, Narnia, Telmar, the Lone Isles … the list went on and on as first one and then another storyteller was called on to relate a good tale.

It all ended with Queen Lucy retelling the story of how she and the other monarchs had first come through the doors of the wardrobe and entered Narnia. Karna listened with open mouth as she heard the tale of the defeat of the White Witch and of Aslan's great sacrifice for the first time.

The feast finally ended and the Narnians left for their beds, weary but happy. Karna had just bidden Lucy, Flora and Susan good night when she saw Peridan walking towards her. There was a determination in his face that surprised her. She met him with a smile.

"Could I walk you home?" he asked.

"Timeon can take me …" she began.

But Peridan shook his head. "I just spoke to Timeon and he will be a little late. He said to go on ahead."

Karna nodded. "Alright."

The journey back to the small holding turned out to be a slow one as they made their way through the quiet castle. The only sounds were those of Narnians bidding each other good night.

"Did you have a good time?" he asked once they were out of the main building.

Karna smiled. "It was the best night of my life, Peridan. I had no idea that life could hold such possibilities and joy. That is, until I met you."

He paused for a moment, seeming to make a decision. Abruptly, he pulled her away to the left, when they should have gone right.

"Peridan, where are we going? The small holding is …"

"I just want to show you the beach in the moonlight."

Not wanting to argue, Karna allowed herself to led down the sandy path and they were soon on the beach. The clear moonlight bleached all colour, making the shore a mixture of blacks and whites.

"There is one thing that is always the same," she commented. "Even from a back street in Tashbaan the moon was as bright and beautiful."

"You do know that I am not responsible for bringing you here, don't you, Karna?"

The seriousness of his tone struck her. "What do you mean, Peridan? Of course it was because of you!"

He shook his head. "No, my love. It was _you_ who had the bravery to hope for such a thing. You were the one who helped me to see the world differently. It was _you_ who showed me that true faith can overcome any adversity, any situation. It was _you_ who taught me what it is to dare to dream for things to be better. That's one of the reasons I fell in love with you."

She couldn't speak. Completely overwhelmed. _Was what he said true?_

Neither could speak for a long time, both overcome. Eventually though, Karna found her voice.

"Only because of the one who encouraged me to. Do you remember the first time we met? I was entranced by your description of Narnia and you told me to never stop dreaming, to keep hoping for good things. It was because of _you,_ Peridan. You gave me hope. You were the first man to ever care about me in my living memory. I didn't understand why you were so willing to risk everything for me and I couldn't help loving you for it. I've never known anyone like you."

Peridan smiled tenderly at her. Very gently, he cupped her chin in his hand.

"Then, may I ask you a very important question?"

Karna felt her heart skip a beat. She could only nod.

"Karna, daughter of Harradin, will you be my wife? Will you marry me?"

It is hard to explain the wave of emotion that overtook Karna at that moment. She had never known such joy, such happiness. Unable to speak, she merely nodded and flung her arms around his neck.

Peridan drew her tightly to him and swung her around joyfully, causing her to squeal and laugh. Karna begged him to put her down. He did so gently before adding,

"Please, say it out loud Karna."

"Yes, I will marry you, Lord Peridan of Narnia. With all my heart."

Again, he drew her too him, but this time he was gentle. He kissed her, tenderly and long. Karna kissed him back, pouring all of her love into it.

When they drew back, each was beaming at the other.

"Shall we go and tell the others?" Karna asked.

Peridan grinned. "We had better, I know Timeon was expecting it."

Karna smiled. "And Aslan knew all along."

Peridan's grin warmed to a smile. "He always does, that's why we trust him."

She nodded, "Always."

With that, they left the beach and headed back to the castle. Both knowing that throughout the rest of their lives, whatever might come to pass, they could trust Aslan for the rest of their lives.

And they did.

* * *

Author's note:

Wails! I can't believe it! I just can't believe it! (Get that film quote and I'll be impressed!)

We actually got here! I also have a small confession to make which I have been putting off telling you for months …

I first started writing _Daring to Dream_ over ten years ago. It was first posted in 2005 and I got to chapter 11 and … well I got writer's block and gave up. It was because of the encouragement of one author that I kept writing it. Her name is Tastyasitgets. She doesn't write actively on here anymore, but she asked me to submit me story to her website back in 2006 because she loved the original idea and that amazing woman beta'd the whole story for me.

It then sat on my computer for nine years until my dear old mum said, "Daring to Dream deserves to be finished"! and because of a case of appendicitis last summer I started down this writing road and now here we are a year later. 115,000 words and I have finished Peridan and Karna's journey, as well as my first ever full-length novel!

I still have to post the epilogue and I will write some personal thank yous to specific people then. But I want to say a HUGE thank you to every single person who has read, favourited, reviewed or put this story on their watch list. Every review has been written by people who love and care about the wonderful world Lewis created and have appreciated the care I have tried to take when using his wonderful characters.

The words of the reviews have been wonderful and so encouraging for me as a writer. So thank you from the bottom of my heart. Also, this is very much not the end. I am going to be starting work on the next project within the next couple of weeks after the epilogue is published, so keep your eyes open and again.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart. You all mean so much to me.

Breeze.


	27. Epilogue

Daring to Dream

Epilogue

The main heat of day had just passed into later afternoon when the squeals were heard. Two little girls came racing out of a low doorway, one brandishing a stick and the other with her arms raised, almost as though she had antlers. The older of the two charged away, roaring loudly. Her younger sister raised her stick.

"Die barbawian lion of Naria!" she shouted, pointing her stick.

Her older sister dived behind a barrel and roared once more.

"Never you evil witch!" she replied, racing ahead.

The smaller girl followed. "I will turn you to stone. I am Jagis, Queen of Naria and you will not steal my kingdom!"

The girls chased around the alley for a while, the older always managing to stay a few steps ahead of her sister. That was, until she had to dodge to the side to avoid one of their neighbours and was cornered by her sister.

"Now die, barbawian!" the little girl cried, pointing her wand directly at her sister's heart. However, instead of falling down as was expected, the older girl sprinted away.

"I'm a magical lion!" she called, roaring for affect. "I can't be turned to stone!"

Her little sister suddenly howled. "That's not _fair!_ " she exclaimed, tears rolling down her face. "I caught you _fair and square! Mama!"_ She ran to their open doorway and buried her small face in the calico apron that had just appeared there.

With her sleeves rolled to her elbows and wet hands, it was obvious that their mother had just been cleaning, regardless of her heavy belly. She sighed in resignation and reached down to lift her youngest daughter on to her hip.

"What's wrong, my delight?" she asked, wiping the tears from her daughter's cheeks.

Her daughter pointed a finger at her eldest sister, who was now trying to climb on to the barrel. "Hezal wouldn't die when she was _supposed_ to!" the little girl exclaimed. "She's Alsan. In the story, Alsan gets stabbed by the witch and comes back to life. It's only after the bakkle that Alsan kills the witch Jagis. She didn't play _fair!_ "

Again, the three-year-old dissolved into tears and had to be rocked gently by her mother. Lifting her youngest daughter higher on her hip, she walked over to the barrel that her eldest had failed to climb on to.

"Hezal, would you come here please?"

All freckles and flying hair, her older girl trotted obediently over, giving her mother a guilty smile.

"Yes, Mama?" she asked, innocently.

"Why did you change the rules of the game?"

"Because Alsan is a _magical_ lion! He shouldn't be turned to stone!"

"Well, As-lan was stabbed in the story. Why didn't you die like you were supposed to?"

"Because I'm magical Mama, and I have the best roar!" Hezal replied, capering around her mother and roaring for dramatic affect.

"Be that as it may, if you agree to a set of rules, you must stick to them or it isn't fair. Now, what do you need to say to Karna?" Hezal pouted slightly.

"Hezal?" her mother pressed.

"I'm sorry," the older girl stated. Her little sister wiped her eyes and stared at her for a moment.

"Karna?" her mother prompted.

"In the name of Tash, I accept your apowogy," Karna replied, struggling with the long word.

"Good, now why don't you both come in? You need to finish your chores before your Father comes home."

Karlis led her two girls into their home and they were soon settled at their chores. Hezal peeling turnips and Karna tidying away their toys. She returned to scrubbing the floor.

"Where did you hear that story, anyway?" she asked.

"Aunt Tarlana told it to us when she visited on rest day," Hezal replied. "She told us that she had been told it by Aunt Karna."

Karlis paused, allowing herself a smile. "I should have guessed. It's the type of story your grandfather wouldn't approve of you hearing. He'd rather you heard some moral poetry."

She didn't miss the face Hezal pulled. "But Aunt Tarlana is such a good story teller. Is it true that Aunt Karna went to live in Naria, Mama?" Her eyes were wide.

Her mother nodded. "Yes. She left Tashbaan six years ago. Her husband saved her from being hurt and they went to Narnia together."

"Why do we never see her, Mama? We see Aunt Tarlana and Aunt Lamarla all the time."

"That is true, but Aunt Karna lives many hundreds of leagues away, my delight. Grandfather would also be angry to see her."

"Why?" Hezal asked.

Karlis chided her for asking so many questions, but answered nonetheless.

"Because she wished to marry your Uncle Peridan and your father wished her to marry someone else."

"Like Aunt Tarlana and Uncle Dareesh?" Karna piped up.

"Yes. Just like Aunt Tarlana and Uncle Dareesh.," Karlis agreed, unable to help smiling.

It had been a great private source of joy to her when she had heard that their father was finally going to allow Tarlana to marry. She had kept his home for two years until Kanzeesh had married Lamarla. Even then, it had not been until Lamarla was pregnant with their second child that Tarneesh had relented at last and allowed Tarlana to marry his fellow carver. Dareesh was several years older than her sister, but he was a good man and Karlis had never seen Tarlana so happy.

"Do you think there will be another wedding soon, Mama? I want to wear my orange dress again." Hezal had particularly enjoyed the wedding last year.

"I don't know. Maybe your Uncle Andur will take a wife soon."

"Will they live with Grandfather and Uncle Kanzeesh?"

"No, my delight. Homes pass to the eldest son. He will be given his own home when he marries."

Peace reigned in the small home for a time.

Karlis finished scrubbing the floor. Hezal completed her turnips and even Karna had stacked her blocks by the time their mother started to think about dinner. She was just turning to the fire when there was a knock upon the door. Curious as to who it could possibly be at such a time when most women were expecting the return of their husbands, Karlis opened it.

She gasped.

The man who stood before her had hair that was greying at the temples. His face was lined. But his back was still as straight, his eyes the same grey and his expression as kind. He bowed deeply to her.

"It is a great pleasure to see you again, Mistress Karlis. In the name of Aslan, the son of the Emperor over the Seas, I greet you."

Karlis forced herself to act and dipped a curtsey.

"In the name of Tash, the irresistible, the inexorable, I greet you, Master Timeon. Please, come in."

She stood aside and motioned to their most comfortable seat.

"Would you care for some tea?"

"Yes, thank you," he said, inclining his head. It was only after he was holding a cup of tea that Karlis allowed herself to speak.

"It is such a surprise to see you, master. But I am delighted."

The healer smiled. "And I, mistress." He glanced at the children. "Are these your daughters?"

Karlis nodded. "This is Hezal, my eldest." She motioned her forward. She was being unusually shy. She was normally so forward with everyone, but she kept to her mother's side and stared at the stranger. "And this is Karna, my youngest." She pulled the little girl around from where she was hiding behind her and lifted her on to her lap.

" _Karna?_ " Timeon queried.

She nodded. "Yes, I named her after Karna. It was actually Ahoz's idea."

The Narnian smiled, creases fanning out around his eyes. "She'll be honoured to hear it."

"My lord, how is it that you are _here_ and in _Tashbaan_ , of all places!"

"I am part of a trade envoy from Narnia who are visiting Tashbaan. The Tisroc thought that six years of sulking from his eldest son was enough and sent envoys wishing to recommence trade negotiations for our lumber. High King Peter sent a delegation to open discussions with the Grand Vizir and I was among them. I could not be in this city and not pay you a visit. Though of course, it must be kept secret from your father. I have a letter to you, from Karna."

Karlis' eyes widened. "Karna can write?"

Timeon's answering smile was one of pride. "She is a talented young woman. She has gained many skills since coming to Narnia. She can now ride and use a bow and arrow. She is also a wonderful mother."

"A mother?" Karlis exclaimed in joy. "Am I an aunt?"

He laughed. "Twice over and I am a grandfather."

"How many children?"

"Two boys, the twins Har and Harradin and a baby girl last winter. She was named Evelina after Peridan's mother. The boys in particular are bundles of energy and frequently run myself and Peridan ragged. Mrs Beaver has taken a particular shine to them and is always chasing them around the castle."

Karlis laughed. "Are she and Peridan happy? Did they marry soon after your return?"

"They were married the following spring and are very happy, I thank you. We all live on a small holding together."

Karlis felt her eyes growing wet as she learned of her sister's life. "I am so happy for her," she stated.

Timeon squeezed her hand kindly. "Shall I read you her letter?"

Karlis nodded.

He drew a roll of parchment from his cloak and unrolled it.

"Dearest Karlis. I'll warrant that you were astonished to see Timeon arriving at your door. I hope he found his way, though he did assure me that he still remembered how to get there! I told him that Calormene homes remain within the family. So I was sure that you and Ahoz would not have moved.

"My dear sister, I hope you are well and happy in Tashbaan with your husband and I do not doubt, a growing family. I was overjoyed when Timeon told me that he was to be part of the delegation heading to Calormen. He is still the most experienced healer at the Narnian court, though he has several apprentices who are also learning the craft.

"Peridan and I were married the Spring after coming to Narnia. It was a beautiful ceremony held in Cair Paravel. I cannot believe that it has been five years since we were wed! I am sure Timeon has already told you, but we have two boys called Har and Harradin. It is the tradition in Archenland to name brothers in such a manner, so we named our youngest son after my father. Our little Evelina arrived last Spring and I have never seen Peridan so protective!

"I have found more happiness and friendship here in Narnia than I could have ever expected or deserved. Timeon is now my stepfather and he treats the children as his own. Thank you for advising me to go, my dear sister. If you had not, I would never had travelled to what really is my true country. I have so many cherished and true friends. Queen Lucy and I are especially close and spend every day together (she is Evelina's godmother).

"I feel in my heart that we will never meet again in this life, but I will look for you in the next. I want you to know how happy and full my life is. Thank you for all your love and support. I hope that you and Tarlana have both found the happiness you deserve.

"Know that I think of you every day and send all my love to you from across the desert. Your sister, Karna."

Karlis was moved beyond words and could only squeeze Timeon's hand gratefully. He passed her the letter and she kissed it lightly.

Little Karna ran a small finger over the ink and looked enquiringly at her mother,

"Is it a letter, Mama?"

"Yes, my delight," Karlis managed, wiping her eyes.

"Who is it from, Mama?" Hezal asked, stepping forward to look.

"Your Aunt Karna," she replied, lightly stroking Karna's hair. "The Aunt Karna you were named for, sweeting." She nodded towards Timeon. "This is your Great Uncle Timeon."

Hezal thought for a moment. "Like Grandfather?"

"Yes. But unlike Grandfather, I think he'd like to meet you. Would you Timeon?"

The older man's face was very gentle. "Very much." He crouched down to the girls' height and smiled. "How old are you girls?"

"I'm five, nearly six," Hezal replied, her shyness forgotten.

Timeon smiled at her sister, "and what about you?"

Karna hid her face in her mother's skirt, shy.

Karlis gently coaxed her up. "Tell him how old you are, Karna."

Eventually, the little girl looked up. "Three," she whispered.

He smiled at her. "My grandsons are both three."

"Grandsons?" Hezal queried. "You mean two boys?"

"Yes," he agreed. "And Harradin is just as shy as you Karna, but do you know what always makes him laugh? When I make him fly."

"Fly?" Hezal exclaimed, "You mean like a bird?"

The healer nodded. "Yes. I guarantee you will giggle if I make you fly."

"Please make me fly!" Hezal cried.

So began an hour of play as Timeon tossed first Hezal and then Karna into the air until they giggled. Karlis watched him with pleasure, seeing the ease with which he interacted with her daughters. He obviously played with his grandsons a lot.

Eventually, the light began to fade and he turned to her sadly.

"I must go," he stated. "But it was an absolute pleasure to see you again, Karlis. To meet your lovely daughters."

Karlis nodded and kissed his cheek. "May Tash watch your travels and keep you safe, Timeon. Thank you. For everything."

Slowly, Timeon kissed her cheek and crouched to hug both girls. "May Aslan guide your steps in safety all your life," he replied. "Good bye."

He left as he had come, like a shadow, melting into the evening dusk.

THE END

* * *

Author's note:

*Wails again and sighs heavily*

Well folks, that as we say, is that. I wanted to end Karna's journey with a wrapping up of loose ends. It might be a little cheesy but I wanted poor old Tarlana to have her happy ending.

I just want to say a MASSIVE, HUGE thank you to you, my wonderful readers for every hit, review, favourite, follow and message. I was discouraged at times on this journey, not knowing where to go, but your reviews often kept me going. I cannot express my gratitude enough. It meant SO much to have people appreciate the time I wanted to take to build the working-class world of Calormen. To have reviewers who found the development of the romance believable and the intertwining with the HHB story believable.

I will miss these characters but am proud of how far we have come. Again, I cannot thank you enough and hope to see you again very soon.

Many thanks, and hugs,

Breeze.

Now, a few personal thank yous to some incredible people:

Zoey Rain – My first ever reviewer back in the summer of 2015 and someone who has read this since the beginning, I cannot thank you enough for all your support and encouragement in sticking with me. Your delight and frustration with the characters often made me feel so happy that I was doing something right. So thank you SO much Zoey.

Calyn – You have read so many of my fics and are always SO encouraging. To call my writing "the real treasure" encouraged me so much. It confirmed to me that I was doing something right and helped my confidence immeasurably as a writer.

Anyabar1987 – You also have been around throughout this writing adventure. Thank you so much for every review and all your support. You reviewed almost every chapter and encouraged me so much to keep going.

Meldahlie – Mel I have few words to express what your reviews have meant to me. Thank you for your honesty, your honest reactions, your humour and for making me laugh out loud more times than I can count with your reactions to my characters (especially Corin!). Your praise means so much to me and the detail with which you review has given me such a joy that you enjoy and appreciate the way in which I write. I'm running out of words, but just thank you SO much for being you and being so faithful in your reviews. I promise to read more of yours when I find some time!

Narniac4aslan – Thank you for every review. Your encouragement has meant a huge amount to me and your great enjoyment of Karna and Peridan's story has been really evident. Your enthusiasm has really helped me as times, so thank you so much.

Kilgarrah – (Is your penname taken from the dragon in Merlin?) Thank you so much for your reviews. Your enjoyment and love of my characters came out in every review and encouraged me so much. Reviews like yours gave me the courage to keep writing when I thought I might be long-winded and started to doubt myself. Thank you so very much, I can't express how grateful I am and what your support has meant.

Sorry if I missed anyone, but your reviews have proven to me the value of having reviewers who appreciate detail and a more novel-like approach to a fanfic. As I cannot seem to do any other kind, my next project may take another year, but never mind! Every review has meant the world and is treasured by me.

Again, for the last time, thank you and hopefully see you soon,

Love,

Breeze.


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